On Monday morning, I stared glumly into my locker, looking for the motivation to go to English. We were studying The Scarlet Letter and I couldn't think of anything less interesting than a bunch of colonists blathering about a woman who got knocked up. My bad mood was intensified by Mamie's departure back to Helena. Already feeling hollow and discouraged at facing another week at school, I shoved my books into my backpack without enthusiasm and closed my locker door, wishing Mom would relent and let me move to D.C. There wasn't much left for me here. The "real world" had faded to a dull gray and I realized with a start that the only time I felt alive anymore was while on the hunt.

Not sure I liked what that said about me, I started toward class. Will met me, wearing the predatory smile I'd come to recognize as "that's my next girlfriend, bro." He pointed down the hall. "Who's the new girl?"

I turned to catch a glimpse of a tiny girl with curly golden-brown hair and the most gorgeous brown eyes I'd ever seen. Seriously, her eyes rivaled Ella's and I couldn't give higher praise than that. Except where Ella was tall with an athletic build, this girl was as delicate as a living, breathing china doll.

I turned to Will, frowning. "Dude, really? She's barely five feet tall, and if she weighs more than ninety pounds soaking wet, I'd be shocked. You'd break her inside of two minutes."

"Maybe she needs a big, strong guy to protect her," he said, standing taller. "Watch and learn."

I dropped my face into my hands, but couldn't make myself look away, so I peeked between my fingers to see how this went down.

Will sauntered up to the girl. "Hey. I'm Will, head of the new student welcome association. Need some help finding your next class?"

She craned her neck to look up at him. "Good Lord, they make *em big in Billings."

My best friend, being a jackwagon of the first order, flexed his biceps by crossing his arms across his wide chest. "In more ways than one."

Pixie-girl rolled her eyes skyward. "Well, that's good to know." She started to walk away, but Will trailed along behind, which elicited a very annoyed sigh. "Look, big guy, I don't take in strays, so stop trying to follow me home."

That did it; I cracked up. If I had any cash on me, I'd lay twenty that Will was about to crash and burn for the very first time.

She stopped right in front of me. "You got a problem, too?"

I choked back another laugh. "NoaI'm just enjoying watching my best friend make a fool of himself."

"You belong with this one?"

I glanced at Will, who looked pretty shocked by her reaction to his charms. "Unfortunately."

She nodded. "Figuresayou're ginormous, too. Well, y'all can move along. I'm competent enough to find my class without a guard dog."

"Wait," Will said as she made her way down the hall. "I didn't get your name."

Without glancing back, she said, "Just so long as you promise not to follow meait's Penn. Penn Stoyer."

Will followed her a few steps. "Penn? That's unusual."

"It's short for Penelope." Penn paused and turned to point a finger at him. "But if you ever call me Penelope, you're dead to me."

She started down the hall again and made it about ten yards before Will called, "At least tell me where you're from? I can't place that accent."

Penn threw her hands up. "Oklahoma. Now, Giant-Will-from-Billings, please excuse me. I'd hate to be late on my first day."

Then she disappeared into the crowd.

Will stood stunned, his jaw slack and I grinned. "That was awesome. I've never seen a girl shoot you down like that."

"Listen close," he said, his voice reverent. "I'm swearing off all other girls until Penn agrees to go out with me. That girl is my Everest."

"I know you like a challenge, but you might be getting ahead of yourself. People die trying to climb Everest," I said. "Look, you don't even know her. What if she's not actually worth the effort?"

"Oh, she's worth it. I can just tell." He grinned at me. "How long do you think it'll take for me to convince her to say yes?"

"Last time I checked, a woman has to like you enough to talk to you as a pre-requisite to scoring a date. Come on, we need to go," I said. When he didn't move, I shoved him. "You're going to be late for first period, Mr. Romance."

I steered him toward his Chemistry class, then I went on to English thinking Penn Stoyer might be the very best thing ever to happen to Will.

Super-power failures were character building.

My C in History would be hard to explain to Mom when report cards came out, but the reason for it was clear. Ella sat two rows over, in the perfect spot for me to stare as the fluorescent lights caught the highlights in her auburn hair. Today it was pulled back into a ponytail, and I swore I could smell her vanilla shampoo from nine feet away. Then there was the awkward moment when I met her eye for the first time after my not-drunk-dial. With that kind of distraction, who could concentrate on a lecture over the Mexican-American war?

Just seeing her was like being stabbed in the guts by a dart of ice. I knew pain: I'd been slashed open, suffered broken bones, had fallen off cliffs and out of trees. I knew grief: men had died protecting me and children had died because I hadn't been fast enough to save them. This pain? The kind of pain where your heart's been ripped out and is walking around on someone else's sleeve? Pretty freaking unbearable.

Once, about halfway through class, Ella looked back at me. Even now, after everything, those green eyes held me captive. She broke eye contact first, and it was like being abandoned all over again, especially since I knew she still cared about me. I glared down at my desktop, wishing I could cut myself free from Tink for a little while, but that was impossible. Maybe Will was right; maybe I needed to find a new girl and snap out of this funk. But even if Tink would let me, how could I date someone else when I couldn't erase the thought of Ella from my brain?

Better that you focus on the job, Tink said. Girls only serve to distract you.

I glared at my desktop, wondering how she knew what I was thinking since I didn't say anything aloud. Probably because I'd been staring at Ella for the last twenty minutes. Tink liked to lecture me at schoola"because she knew I couldn't argue for fear of looking crazy for talking to myself in the middle of class. So my retort of, "You're a girl and what are you doing right now, if not distracting me?" went unsaid. But I clenched my fists under my desk, hoping she would get the message and shut up.

The bell rang and I left as quickly as I could, having absorbed no new knowledge in the last fifty-five minutes. I pushed my way into the crush of people in the hallway, determined not to make eye contact with Ella again. Walking fast, with my head down, I collided with a girl. I didn't even see her standing there, and I bumped her so hard that her books spilled across the floor in a sweeping arc. Without even looking up, I ducked to help pick up the mess, mumbling, "sorry about that."

"No worries," a sultry voice said. "You looked preoccupied."

I tilted my chin up, coming face-to-face with Sami Webbera"aka, the reason God created cheerleader uniforms. Blond, gorgeous and built in a way only Michelangelo could duplicate, she was the lone girl who ever made Ella jealous. Sami's crush on me had been a sore subject with her last spring. The funny thing? I hadn't even noticed Sami's attention until Ella mentioned it.

Well, I noticed Sami now. It was very hard to ignore the way she was bending to get her booksagiving me a prime view down the front of her top while her mini-skirt rode high across her thighs. She seemed to be doing that on purpose, coveringa"or, uncoveringa"her bases to make sure I saw what most interested me.

It worked.

Somehow I choked out, "I wasn't looking where I was going. Really sorry."

I grabbed her last book and stood. Sami smiled up at me, telling me she knew more than she let on aboutawell, everything.

Sami brushed a strand of blond hair off her shoulders, her eyes crinkled at the corners. "It's not a big deal. Thanks for helping me with my books." She took a few steps closer, until I was pressed against the wall and she was mere inches away.

My body went core-of-the-earth hot. Yeah, her crush was still alive and well and right in my face. "Um, you're welcome."

Sami ran a manicured fingernail across my chest. "Nice shirt. Blue's a good color on you."

Danger, danger, meltdown in progress. I had to get out of here. Sami was cute, but not my type; I needed to get away before I did something stupid.

I was about to say thanks and try to move on, but a flash of auburn caught in my peripheral vision. I turned to spy Ella watching us with a weary expression on her face. That one glance lit a fire in my gut, flaming up every bit of anger and frustration I'd carried the last four months.

To hell with types. Will was righta"it was time to forget.

I handed Sami her books. "So, Sami, I was wonderinga.you doing anything this Saturday?"

Sami's smile went from mysterious to promising. Really, really promising. "Not yet."

Refusing to look Ella's direction, I said, "Good. I'll pick you up at seven."

The rest of the week went by like a funeral dirge. Ella wouldn't look at me in History after that. She wasn't rude or anything, justaresigned. In truth, I regretted asking Sami out, but I forgot that every time she showed up at my locker to flirt. If anyone had asked me two years ago if I thought a hot cheerleader would be hanging all over me in the halls, I would've laughed. Now whenever Sami appeared, always wearing something that hugged her figure like a second skin, I became brain-dead. I followed blindlya" nodding, smiling, droolinga"in her wake. Her shampoo smelled like roses; I forced myself to forget that I preferred vanilla.

Still, a hard kernel of doubt, and guilt if I was honest about it, lurked in my chest when I stared at the back of Ella's head every afternoon. Worse, I felt a little bit justified for showing Ella I was moving on, and that pissed me off, too.

Making things even more uncomfortable, every time I let Sami pull me into a hug in the hallway at school, the knife-spirit grumbled in my mind. Tink hadn't snapped me in the forehead like a bad dog yet, but I kept tensing up whenever Sami was around just in case. So far, though, all I got were grating tirades about my inability to behave properly.

Teenagers, she griped after Sami left me grinning like a fool in the hallway on Thursday. No control whatsoever. I should've adjusted your hormone balance while speeding up your growth, but the others were worried that would cause issues.

I stuck my head inside my locker so no one would hear me ask, "What others?"

My brothers. They think they know more about the ways of men and told me to back off. It seems silly that they'd claim to be the experts about you since we're not human, but whatever.

I choked back a laugh. "*But whatever?' Where'd you pick that up?"

Where do you think? I'm trying to learn your language, eradude?

"No. Uh-uh. No calling me dude."

She sighed. FineaMatthew.

Growling inside my head, I went to class feeling like a cosmic joke. I got all the nagging of a girlfriend on the inside, but none of the benefits of having a real girlfriend on the outside.

And I wasn't the only one having trouble.

On Friday, I caught Will trying to talk Penn into sitting with us at luncha"for the fifth day in a row.

"I don't bite," he was saying to her when I passed by. "Unless you ask."

Tiny Penn put her tray down on the closest table and stood toe-to-toe with Will. Her head came up to the middle of his chest, but anybody watching had no doubt that she had the upper hand.

"Oh, great, I can't even say *bite me' without encouraging you," she said, sounding exasperated. "Look, giant-Will-from-Billings, I had to move here in the middle of my junior year, leaving all my friends behind because my dad got a promotion. It sucks, okay? I'm running on empty right now and I need some space. Please attempt to understand."

With that, she grabbed her tray and hurried to the far side of the cafeteria.

I followed Will to our regular table. "You know, I feel kind of bad for her."

"Yeah, but all I want to do is talk to her." Will flopped into his seat. "If she gets to know me a little bit, maybe she'll like what she sees, right? Then moving here wouldn't suck so bad."

"And maybe you're trying too hard," I said, picking at the grey slab of mystery meat the cafeteria was passing off as meatloaf. I thought about taking a whiff to see if it was really made out of road kill, but some things were best left unexamined.

Will huffed out a breath. "Who knows. By the waya"cheerleader inbound, two o'clock."

I turned to see Sami heading over to our table. She smiled and waved when she caught me looking and I half-smiled in return.

"Hey, guys." She leaned against our table, giving Will and me what I thought was an intentional look down her shirt. "I can't wait for our date tomorrow night."

Tink stirred in my head, muttering something about "wanton hussies" and it was all I could do to keep from laughing at the sheer insanity of this moment.

"Yeah," I said, trying to sound more excited than I felt. "See you tomorrow."

Sami stood upa"the show was over apparentlya"and blinked fast, like she hadn't expected me to be so curt. "We're still on for seven?"

I nodded. "Pick you up then."

Will and I watched her walk away, swinging her hips just the right amount to render every guy in a twenty-foot radius mute.

"Man," Will said after she disappeared through the cafeteria doors. "She's hot enough to melt concrete."

I dropped my napkin over my meatloaf. "I guess."

"*I guess?' Did your lunch kill you and I just didn't notice?" he asked, glancing at my tray.

I didn't answer right away; Ella was talking and laughing with her friends halfway across the cafeteria, but even from here I could tell she wasn't really all that happy. Her smile didn't reach her eyes, and she looked tired.

When I turned my attention back to Will, he was nodding. "No, you wouldn't notice Sami, would you? Not when Ella's in the same universe."

"You were the one who said I should go out with someone else." I leaned my elbows on the table and propped my chin on my hand.

"My advice wasn't to go out with someone just because," Will said. "It was for you to move on and forget her. Obviously, you can't do that, because Ella's stuck on a never-ending loop in your brain. So, I was wrong before. What you need to do is fly solo for a really long time. Months, maybe."

That stung, partly because I knew he was right, and partly because the knife-spirit was grating my nerves like she wanted them shredded on a pizza. "Probably, and maybe you should take your own advice. Stop chasing Penna"or anyone elsea"for a while. If you back off, she might be more interested."

Will's gloomy expression made me feel bad for suggesting it, but sometimes the truth hurts. "What's wrong with us? Six months ago, you had Ella and I was totally okay with hooking up with any girl I wanted. Now the only girl I want thinks I'm an idiot, and you're going out with the hottest girl in school, but you look like you're facing a geometry test. And then there's my dad and all his bullshita" Without warning, he clenched his fists on the table. "My life just sucks right now."

"Dude, what are you talking about? So Penn isn't interested? You'll get past it someday." I swallowed hard, not sure my next words would clear my throat. "Andaand I'll get past Ella."

"But what if we don't?" Will asked, his voice rising. "What if I'm destined to follow in my old man's footsteps, never do anything but play football, sell cars and marry the freaking homecoming queen? I want to matter, okay? Right now, I don't. I don't matter! And it's killing me a little bit every day."

"Willawhat's going on? Are things getting bad at home?" Why was he cracking now, in the middle of the cafeteria, when only a week ago he was dodging rock monsters and saving my butt without wigging out? Had his parents finally punched his last button? "Whatever it is, it'll get better. We'll be finea"you'll see."

"If I'm anything, it's not fine!" With that, Will shoved his chair back so hard it banged into the wall. Heads swiveled around to check out the scene as Will slowly stood, grabbed his tray in a death grip and stomped away, leaving me staring at his back with my mouth hanging open. Normally I was the one who suddenly flipped out at school. Will didn't lose it like thisa"he found his Zen by slamming into guys on the football field, and it was typically his job to reel me back to earth when I went Hulk-Smash for no good reason.

Not today, though. Today, it looked like it was my turn to figure out how to keep him from breaking. I was crossing through the cafeteria doors on my way to do just that when a hand landed on my elbow.

"Let him go," Ella said.

A thrill zipped through my body, but I kept walking. I didn't follow Will, though. Instead, I went the opposite direction to an empty classroom and Ella wasn't far behind me. I ground my teeth in frustration; somehow I knew she was right and Will needed a few minutes alone, but it drove me crazy.

What was going through his head right now? Why'd he go off like that? Was Penn now Sacred Ground, or was it something else, something bigger that I just didn't understand?

Worried, I flung the classroom door open so hard it flew out of my hand and slammed into the wall. I waited for Ella to follow me inside, then tugged the doorknob free of the hole it'd made in the plaster and closed it behind her. Unable to stand still, I paced back and forth across the cheap carpet, hoping Will wasn't out driving his BMW into a tree or doing something equally stupid while I gave him space.

Ella crossed the room slowly, like she was trapped with a caged tiger. "What's going on with you two?"