Chapter Five.

Pearl I stared at him through my open window. Days had passed and I avoided him with outmost care. Our last conversation in the car didn't end well. I didn't like his responses. And I didn't like the words that left my mouth either.

But I missed him.

Now I stared at him through my bedroom window, watching his powerful shoulders fill out his suit was masculinity. He walked with his hands in his pockets, owning the vineyards and everything beyond.

A woman walked beside him. She wore a pretty dress with a hat. Her face wasn't easily distinguished but I could tell she was beautiful. Perhaps she worked with him. Or maybe she was someone who tended to his fields during the harvest. I wasn't sure.

She stopped in her tracks and her hand moved to his arm.

A bolt of jealousy washed through me but I quickly let it die. It was stupid to feel any attachment toward him, especially at such an innocent touch. I'd hugged Lars before. It would be absurd if Crow became jealous.

And jealous wasn't in my vocabulary. I was screwing a man so cold he couldn't feel the fire when he stood right beside it. The instant his fingertips began to thaw he shut me out. He convinced himself the sensation never occurred to begin with.

He may not be the best man in the world but he wasn't the worst. He convinced himself he was evil but I had yet to see a hideous act. He whipped me and spanked me but that was consensual. He never did anything against my will.

So where did his self-loathing come from?

I continued to watch him tower over the woman, his dark hair perfectly styled with his five o' clock shadow coming in. I missed his lips all over me. I hadn't been satisfied in days and I was annoyed when he didn't come for me. My mind may not be attached to him but my body certainly was.

I wanted him between my legs.

I wanted the leather to mark my skin with every snap. I wanted his palm to smack my ass when he fucked me from behind. I wanted his fingers to twist my nipples so hard I cried.

I missed him more than I cared to admit. I was far too proud to make the first move. I was far too stubborn to be the first one to make the move. All I had to do was use my fingers to satisfy myself until he caved. Knowing his sexual appetite, he would surrender very soon.

My eyes watched her move in and press a kiss against his mouth. It was soft and full of desperation. Her hand remained on his arm, touching him like it wasn't her first time.

Rage shot through me.

Unbridled anger like I'd never known exploded inside me.

I saw red.

My blood boiled and murder was on my mind.

Jealousy like I've never known swirled inside me and burned every nerve. I just convinced myself I didn't feel anything for this man. He was just my captor, someone I'd grown fond of. But out of nowhere my body ignited in a terrible blaze. I was jealous-more jealous than I've been in my entire life.

I told him I was his. He made love to me on my bed and I gave him what he wanted. The connection between us burned me alive and made me feel like I belonged somewhere. This place felt like home. It was vulnerable and terrifying. But I went to the place where he took me and let it happen. I allowed him to conquer me.

And he was off with other women.

I was pissed-to say the least.

Hours later I was still pissed off. The passage of time hadn't dulled my hatred. I wanted to slap him across the face and make his skin turn deep red. I wanted to kick him right in the nuts and watch him cower underneath me.

My rage even terrified me.

A few hours after dinner a knock sounded on my door.

I eyed the doorknob, feeling my anger rise like heat in a cold room. If it were him I wouldn't be able to hold my tongue. Profanities would fly out of my mouth quicker than air.

He knocked again when I didn't answer.

If he were smart, he would just walk away.

He cracked the door open and saw me sitting on the couch. He was in his sweatpants and t-shirt, the clothes he wore a few hours before bed. Judging the darkness in his eyes he wanted me. He gave into his desire and finally made the first move. Scotch was on his breath even though I couldn't smell it. He had to drink in order to find the courage to face me.

Coward.

He slowly approached the couch then kneeled at my feet. He separated my knees then inserted his torso in between. His hands moved to my thighs, gently squeezing them before he looked me in the eye. "I miss you." He pressed his forehead to mine and eyed my lips.

"Really?" I couldn't keep the derision out of my voice.

He met my gaze when he noticed the ferocity.

"You fuck some skank and then miss me?" I asked incredulously. "You're such an ass." I shoved him hard in the chest so he fell back onto the carpet.

He fell with the momentum because he hadn't expected the attack. He quickly sat up, not reacting or even seeming like he was in pain.

"Get out of my room. Now." I stormed to the door and threw it open. "Unless you want a hard kick in the nuts. And I know how much you like those." I didn't feel an ounce of fear for this man. I could go head-to-head with him and win.

He finally rose to his feet, his powerful arms tensing by his sides. "I didn't fuck some skank."

"Don't lie to me." That was more insulting than what he did with that slut. "Do whatever you want but don't pull that shit on me."

"What the fuck is going on?" He slammed the door so our voices wouldn't carry to the rest of the house. He grabbed me by the neck and threw me against the wall, pinning me down so I couldn't move an inch.

"Why don't you tell me?" I tried to knee him but he blocked it.

He slapped me hard across the face, catching me off guard. "Spit it out."

I recovered from the hit, hating myself for being aroused. "I saw you with your girlfriend outside."

His eyes shifted to the window before the turned back to me. Realization followed the blank look a moment later.

"Yeah. You've been caught. Maybe next time you should shack up at a hotel."

"Shut up." He threw me against the wall again.

"No." I kicked him in the shin.

He pressed his entire body against me so I couldn't move.

"I told you I was yours." The hatred left my voice just for a second, replaced by sorrow. I felt stupid for ever thinking I was the only woman in his life. I felt stupid for caring.

His eyes narrowed. "You are mine. But I never said I was yours." He squeezed my throat so I could hardly breathe. "Let's get that straight right now. I do what I want when I want. I don't owe you a goddamn thing. You're my slave. Slave."

My heart shattered into pieces when I heard that word. My captivity began in the form of slavery but it slowly changed into something else entirely. I could have hoarded all of my buttons and worked toward freedom as quickly as possible. But I sacrificed some of my tokens to be with him in a different way. This whole time I thought he didn't mean anything to me but now the truth was looking at me right in the face.

He gave me a final squeeze before he released me, watching me slide down to the floor while my chest shook with dry coughs. His look was ice-cold, freezing just like the artic circle.

I was the first one to look away, the defeat overruling my body. He didn't just win the battle but he won the war. There was no fight left inside me. My mind may have stayed on the prize but my heart had a different agenda.

I had to get out of there as soon as possible.

I didn't want to stay in this house-with him.

There was nothing waiting for me back at home but it was still better than here. I could start over in a new place. Maybe with enough time I could start to believe in humanity again.

There was nothing for me here.

My only ticket to freedom was my hoard of buttons. I had to collect every single one until the jar was full. Then he would release me. Maybe his promise as false but I had to keep going in the hope he truly was a man of his word.

After three days of silence between us I swallowed the vomit sitting in the back of my throat and dove in. I went downstairs and joined him for dinner-but without the intention of eating.

He looked up from his phone when he heard me into the dining room. His eyes filled with surprise at my presence but only for a nanosecond. He quickly changed the look, seeming as indifferent as before.

I ignored my chair and dropped to my knees in front of his. I positioned myself between his muscled thighs and undid the button and zipper of his jeans. His cock popped out, quickly hardening at my arrival. I pulled my hair to one side and shoved it into the back of my throat.

A breath escaped between his teeth and he dug his fingers into my hair as he enjoyed it. He gently thrust into me from below, pushing further into my mouth. He grabbed the back of my neck to get a better hold and guided me to the pace he desired.

I hated myself for getting wet.

I hated myself for enjoying it.

I hated him. But I still wanted him.

I entered his playroom wearing black lingerie, the kind with block stockings and a tight teddy. I didn't bother with the panties because I knew they would be ripped to shreds anyway. I hit the button on the intercom, the one that connected to his study. "Join me." I released the button and walked to the center of the room. I'd only been inside a handful of times but I knew where most of his kinky apparatuses were.

I grabbed the leather choker and hooked it around my neck, knowing I was about to do something more extreme than anything else. But if I got a huge paycheck out of it I didn't care. It was one more step closer to freedom.

He entered a moment later, his eyes intense with longing. He eyed the leather wrapped around my neck and couldn't hide his surprise-and his desire. His hands immediately removed his clothes, his eyes on me the entire time. Then he grabbed the rope to suspend me.

"Fifty."

His hand was still on the rope but he didn't pull.

"Fifty. Take it or leave it." It was the biggest payment I would ever receive. But now I was aiming high, needing to get the hell out of here as quickly as possible. The connection between us was never there. Every time he said something cold I assumed he was in denial. But now I understood he truly was an empty vessel. I was just one of the many. When I left he would forget about me.

He pondered the offer before he finally nodded. "Fifty."

I closed off my mind just as I did when I was a prisoner of Bones. I just completed tasks without considering the details. I rode his cock when he asked, and I endured things more painful than I could possibly imagine. He always made me come-but that was the only sensation I allowed myself to feel.

Over the weeks I'd accumulated an impressive amount of buttons. I snatched them from his hand and tossed them inside the vase, watching them pile higher and higher. When the depression kicked in, I dumped them out and counted each one.

275.

I had 275 buttons. That meant I only need ninety more. He'd already choked me while he fucked me, whipped me until I sobbed, and fucked me in the ass too many times to count. There was nothing new we hadn't tried. If I just allowed him to choke me two more times I would be free.

So close.

Chapter Six.

Crow I refused to admit it.

I wasn't hers.

I would never be hers.

She had to deal with it and finally come to terms with it.

But I knew that wasn't true the moment I turned Jasmine down. I had every right to do what I wanted but I simply didn't want to. My eyes never ventured elsewhere, and I didn't even consider jerking off. My mind and body exclusively belonged to one woman.

But I would never tell her that.

She could continue to think I screwed some other woman. That would put space between us. We returned to master and slave just as I wanted. Our conversation were at a bare minimum and all we concentrated on was the feeling of our bodies moving together.

But I started to feel empty.

She didn't join me for dinner or breakfast. When I came to her room she hardly looked at me. Not once did she ask me to do something for her. I waited for a request for dinner and a trip to the beach but it never came. Even after weeks had come and gone she kept up her walls.

She didn't let me in.

I knew her buttons were adding up but I hadn't kept track. We fucked around the clock like animals and she did things that made my cock scream in joy. She joined me in the darkness and turned into a beast. She was just feral, carnal, and out of control as myself. I'd been too busy enjoying it to care how much it cost me.