" Why?" He smiled.

" I've heard they'll gonna go to Daba to rescue Amado's Señorita, don't go with them."

" But...they need me too, anyway, we'll not formally use weapons. There's a plan already set and it's never that risky. It just need backups so I must go with them."

" No." She insisted.

" But, Mag. it would just be three days. What's three days if someone like Amado could see his - woman.

" No. The team were all combatants too so you don't need to worry, okay?"

" Hmm...it's up to you." Then she turned her head on the other side of the bed.

" Hey, are you mad? My job...this is how a soldier thinks when it comes to their jobs. I must work and serve this land, we're at war with the j.a.ps." Then he moved closer to her, pacifying her inner complaints.

" Why should I. I don't have any reason. Go! You go now. If your travel would be tomorrow, better leave today. Daba is 100 kms from here, that's the reality since you can't go across the sea by boat. You'll gonna be spending a month with your team, you may start your travel today, from here." Then she stood up and went to room number #5. He worry too much and followed immediately.

" Mag, why you're here. This isn't be the place for you. We're supposed to talk first of something more important, let's go back there in our bedroom. Come, hold my hand."

" But she knelt in front of the handguns, took some ammos and sword from the wooden boxes and brought those stuffs back to the bedroom. She just pa.s.sed him by. Then he followed her towards their bedroom.

" And I'm seeing you now, really , really mad at me. Look at me."

" I cannot speak any word to defend my pointless reasons in front of anyone. Supposed I'll argue, it breaks patience and time. If you'll do, it works either. I better choose to stay on guard with my sanity. Period."

" But...I'm a soldier, Mag."

" Did I label you as a Doctor? or a Teacher? Good that you're always mentioning that you're a soldier. You internalizes it more and more. So now, I'm done listening that you're a soldier, it's actually after several times. Yes, you are a soldier. Do you want me to cry? No. I won't. This is the reason why I never wanted to marry early. But you all polluted my mind. You all told me to marry this soldier in front of me to keep me safe, my protector. I'm pregnant. My baby needs a protector, but you will rescue someone so far, protect them. And tomorrow, my protector will leave for miles away. I was a victim of broken promises. Don't expect me to cry. This is it. Go."

He was silent and just say beside the bed then spoke.

" Our house is very safe. Amado had long been suffering over this, he's part of this team. We have to be of service to anyone."

" Then go."

" But you're angry. How can I leave you when you're flaring. I...I just wanted you to understand, Mag, please."

" I said you may leave. Go now, I need to cry, it's already hurting my brain. My oxygen is getting empty. Go! I said, go. I don't like you to see me cry. Go!"

He wasn't moving but waited until when she would release her catharsis. But still she never cried and even finished loading ammos to her handgun. She was also done checking her sword.

" What are you thinking. Why you're exposing all these weapon, don't tell me you can go there, no!"

" George, it's wartime. My country needs me. I am a guerrilla. If I stay alone inside for a month, I might die of guilt looking to the needy. I was just very silent for several months because you all overhauled my mind. You all convinced me that marriage can help me then I was an *diot, poor self, huh!"

" You can't go, you're pregnant, that's too risky. You can't."

" I will not go attack the j.a.ps' den now. I'll do it when all of you will leave today or tomorrow. Isn't it clear?"

" No. I said, no!" He insisted.

" You can't control me because I'm very upset. You don't know how I feel. I'm a woman, weak, in fact you all call me frail. But if I go to Hakanori and tell him to free all the captives in exchange of me, you all will not be bothered. Family members meet again, reunited. I'm one of the reasons why there we're captives, that j.a.ps announced and used my name so that the families of the captives would hate me and find me. Don't you find pain in that? I am bribed, trapped, imprisoned and underestimated. Who knows if Amado will just being you there and consider a trap. You are not immortal. Once you all killed, he'll go back and will search the house, and one day could see the secret door going here in the granite house. He could not open the door so he will call the j.a.ps or use anything to destroy the door, could open it. He could kill or do anything against me and my baby, why not. So that's a possibility. I better empower myself to kill before being killed. That's just my contribution for this war, George. I will rip all my names in your journal. I can die in peace, I'm not afraid. All I know is I'm upset with this war and the j.a.ps. They curtailed my dreams. I never dreamt of being left by my husband. Ina Lolita suffered during giving birthday before, there was never any husband who took good care of her. The last child she gave birth with was never attended by anyone, she was alone and I was traumatized by how she a.s.sisted herself. Now, I couldn't blame her for being strict, nagger and a strong woman. That's my inner reason if why I'm afraid of marriage during wartime because if my husband would die before I give birth too, I tell you! I don't know to stay awake and conscious while exhaling and pulling a baby at the same time, cutting the umbilical cord with open eyes. Indeed! that's a sad story of a poor woman I knew. Now, go! I'll go away and think on how to give birth. but before that I would kill some enemies, so noisy enemies who used our house, destroyed my library, and they're the reason why I stopped from studying. I lost my future." She ended, sweating and teary eyed.

"