A do-it-yourself romantic picnic: 1 loaf of bread, 1 hunk of cheese, 1 bottle of wine.

A do-it-yourself romantic Sunday afternoon: 1 canoe, 1 lazy day, 2 starstruck lovers.

If some form of romance is not on your to-do list, you may want to reevaluate your priorities.

78 Pay close attention to the subtle signals, the nonverbal clues, the body language and tone of voice that your lover uses.

79 Anticipate your partner.

Is he stressed at work? Would he like a back rub or time alone?

Does she need a dinner out or a movie in?

Does he need extra sleep or a surprise lovemaking session?

Take extra good care of her during the most difficult days of her menstrual cycle.

A great book:.

To-Do Lists of the Dead, by Jonathan Katz.

I DO.

80 Special musical selections for a "Wedding Day Playlist" for your iPod, for you to share with your bride or groom on your wedding day: "Life Is Wonderful," by Jason Mraz, on the album Mr. AZ "Untitled," by Teitur, on the album Poetry and Aeroplanes "You Are So Beautiful (To Me)," by Joe Cocker, on the album I Can Stand a Little Rain "Truly," by Lionel Richie, on the album Lionel Richie "With You I'm Born Again," by Billy Preston & Syreeta, on the album Late at Night "Reflections in a Summer Pond," by Paul Winter, on the album Sun Singer "Overjoyed," by Christine Kane, on the album Right Outta Nowhere.

Chapter Theme Song:.

"I Do (Cherish You),"

98 Degrees.

81 For those of you who do not want a traditional wedding ceremony: Get married on skis-at Heavenly Resort, in Lake Tahoe, California. Call 800-HEAVENLY; or visit www.skiheavenly. com.

Tie the knot on a beach-on the tropical island of Fiji. Call 800-YEA-FIJI; or visit www.bulafiji.com.

Create a truly fairy-tale wedding-at Walt Disney World, in Orlando, Florida. Call 407-828-3400; or visit www.disneyweddings.com 82 Plan ahead-way ahead! Get a friend to buy fifty of the top magazines and newspapers that are on the newsstand on your wedding day. (Everything from the New York Times to the New Yorker; Cosmo and Playboy; TV Guide and Time; Harper's and Highlights for Children; Sports Illustrated and the National Enquirer.) Pack them safely away (in a dark, dry, cool place) and present them to your partner-on your twenty-fifth wedding anniversary!

Get married underwater-at the Amoray Dive Resort in Key Largo, Florida. Call 800-4AMORAY, or visit www.amoray.com.

DOS & DON'TS.

83.

Don't buy roses for Valentine's Day- Do buy flowers that begin with the first letter of her name.

Don't go to the beach on crowded weekends- Do go mid-week.

Don't go to popular vacation spots during their busy seasons- Do go right before or after the busy season.

Don't turn yourself into a martyr- Do make some sacrifices for each other Don't read the newspaper at the breakfast table- Do talk with one another over breakfast.

Don't give him a birthday present- Do give him seven gifts, one for each day of his birthday week.

Don't wait.

Do be romantic.

(I mean now-right now! Put down this book and go do something romantic!).

Don't leave lovemaking until just before sleeping- Do schedule more time for foreplay.

Don't make love the same way every time- Do eliminate distractions for two to three hours.

Don't rush through lovemaking- Do slow down! You'll both enjoy yourselves, and each other, more.

Don't: Negotiate-as if your relationship were a business deal- Do: Learn the gentle art of loving compromise.

Don't try to change your partner- Do accept him or her for the special, unique person he or she is.

Don't act your age- Do wacky things; express your quirkiness; be creative.

DON'TS & DOS.

84 Don't try to have a "perfect" relationship. There's no such thing. Expecting one will only paralyze you. Once you eliminate the goal of perfection, nothing can hold you back! You'll lose your fear of "doing it right." You'll lose your fear of taking risks. And people who take risks, who live life creatively and spontaneously, live more fun-filled, passionate lives.

Chapter Theme Songs (and good advice):.

"Don't Change," Everclear "Don't Stay Home" and "Don't Dwell," 311 "Don't Leave Me Alone," Extreme "Don't Mess with My Love," M2M "Don't Walk Away," MXPX "Don't Stop Dancing," Creed "Don't Shut Me Out," Keith Urban "Don't Let Me Down," No Doubt "Don't Be Stupid (You Know I Love You)," Shania Twain "Don't Make Me Love You," Christina Aguilera "Don't Forget About Us," Mariah Carey "Don't Stop the Love," 98 Degrees "Don't Push Love Away," The Juliana Theory.

85.

Don't buy gifts at the last minute. (You probably won't find a great gift, and you probably will pay top dollar.) Do plan ahead. (Less stress for you, more joy for your partner, less effect on your wallet.) 86 Don't relate to your lover as a stereotype. He's an individual, not a statistic. And she's a unique person, not "just like all women." Today's tabloid topics, talk-show trends, and sex surveys have only limited relevance to you and your lover and your relationship. Take it all with a large grain of salt. You'll never lose by treating your partner as a unique and special person.

DO.

87.

Go out of your way for him or her. Being romantic only when it's convenient is like giving flowers on Valentine's Day-it's expected and, frankly, it's no big deal!

Always pick him or her up at the airport after a trip-no matter what time the flight arrives Offer to stop at the store on the way home from work.

Take care of the kids when it's not "your turn."

88 Decide to fall in love all over again. That's it-just decide. You don't need to read books that analyze your relationship. You don't need therapy. You just need to decide.

Just think of the great opportunity you have: The less romantic you've been, the more dramatic the change will be! I've had guys in the Romance Class simply make up their minds to be more romantic. They've reported that this simple decision led to falling in love with their wives all over again.

89 Accompany each other to doctor appointments. Going along for routine checkups gives you opportunities for quickie coffee dates. And accompanying him or her when there are difficult problems allows you to provide emotional support.

Overwhelm him/her!

Honor him/her!

Woo him/her!

Date him/her!

Stimulate him/her!

Nurture him/her!

Understand him/her!

Support him/her!

Calm him/her!

Surprise him/her!

Delight him/her!

90 Listen! Listen with your ears, mind, and heart. Listen for the meaning behind his actions. Listen for the message behind her words.

DON'T.

91.

Don't gloat when you're right.

Don't sulk when you don't get your way.

Don't worry-be happy.

Don't try to pack too much into the weekend.

Don't over-schedule your vacations.

Don't make the same mistake twice.