"Steady, boy, steady," I said, and I went to question Marie rather sharply as to whether she loved Robert or not.

Over the noise of the vacuum cleaner, she gave me coy, equivocal answers. "I feel like I'd kind of created him," she said, "starting with nothing."

"He says you've showed him the savage in himself," I said.

"That's what I mean," she said. "I don't think there was was any savage to begin with." any savage to begin with."

"What a pity," I said, "after they've gone to so much expense keeping the savages out. If you married him, you'd have a very rich savage, you know." expense keeping the savages out. If you married him, you'd have a very rich savage, you know."

"It's just an incubator baby now," she said wickedly.

"Life is losing all meaning for Robert," I said. "You don't know what you're doing to him. He's stopped caring if he wins or loses at tennis and sailing."

As I spoke of another's love and looked into the wide, blue windows of her soul, a rich, insistent yearning flooded my senses. "He can't even manage a smile anymore when somebody p.r.o.nounces Pisquontuit the way it's spelled," I murmured, my voice trailing off at the end.

"I'm very sorry, I'm sure," she said bewitchingly.

I lost my head. I seized her by the wrist. "Do you love me?" I whispered hoa.r.s.ely.

"I might," she said.

"Do you or don't you?"

"It's hard," she said, "for a girl who's been brought up to be friendly and affectionate to tell. Now let an honest girl get about her work."

I told myself that I had never seen such an honest and pretty girl in all my life, and went back to Robert a jealous rival.

"I can't eat, I can't sleep," he said.

"Don't cry on my shoulder," I snapped. "Go talk to your father about it. Let him him sympathize." sympathize."

"G.o.d no!" he said. "What an idea!"

"Have you ever talked to him about anything anything?" I said.

"Well, for a while there, there was what he called getting to know the boy, getting to know the boy," said Robert. "He used to set aside Wednesday nights for that, when I was little."

"All right," I said, "you've got a precedent for talking to him. Recreate the spirit of those days." I wanted him to get off the couch so him. Recreate the spirit of those days." I wanted him to get off the couch so I I could lie down and stare at the ceiling. could lie down and stare at the ceiling.

"Oh, we didn't talk exactly," said Robert. "The butler would come up to my room and set up a motion-picture projector, and then father would come up and run off Mickey Mouse for an hour. We just sat in the dark with the thing grinding away."

"As thick as thieves!" I said. "What brought an end to these emotional binges?"

"A combination of things," said Robert. "The war mostly. He was chief air-raid warden of Pisquontuit, in charge of the siren and all, and it took a lot out of him. And I got the hang of feeding the film through the spools and all myself."

"Kids mature early around here," I said, contemplating a nice dilemma. It was my duty as tutor to make Robert a mature individual. Yet, his immaturity gave me my biggest advantage over him in our rivalry for Marie. After much thought, I devised a plan that promised to make Robert a man and deliver Marie into my arms free and clear.

"Marie," I said, catching her in the hall, "is it Robert or is it me?"

"Shhhhh!" she said. "Keep your voice down. There's a c.o.c.ktail party downstairs, and sound carries right down the stairway."

"Wouldn't you like to be taken away from all this?" I whispered.

"Why?" she said. "I like the smell of furniture polish, I make more money than my girlfriend at the airplane factory, and I meet a very high cla.s.s of people."

"I'm asking you to marry me, Marie," I said. "I "I'd never be ashamed of you."

She took a step backward. "Now, what made you say a mean thing like that? Who's ashamed of me, I want to know?"

"Robert," I said. "He loves you, but his shame is bigger than his love."

"He's glad enough to dance with me," she said. "We have a lovely time."

"In private," I said. "Do you think, for all your charms, he'd dance one step with you at the Yacht Club? In a pig's eye."

"He would," she said slowly, "if I wanted him to, if I really wanted him to."

"He'd rather die," I said. "You've heard of closet drinkers? Well, you've got yourself a closet lover."

I left her with this annoying thought, and was gratified to see a challenging look in her eye when she came to dance late that night. She did nothing unusual, however, until Robert cut in. Ordinarily, she transferred from me to Robert without opening her eye or missing a step. This time she stopped, her eyes open wide.

"What is this?" said Robert, dipping lowly and twisting his toes, while she stood as rigid as an iron post. "Something wrong?"

"No," said Marie in a brittle tone. "Why would you think there was something wrong?"

Rea.s.sured, Robert started to dip and twist some more, but again failed to budge Marie.

"There is is something wrong," he said. something wrong," he said.

"Do you think I'm at all attractive, Robert?" said Marie coolly.

"Attractive?" said Robert. "Attractive? Lord yes! I should say. I'll tell the world."

"As attractive as any girl my age in Pisquontuit?"

"More!" said Robert heartily, starting to dance again, and again getting nowhere. "Much more, much, much more," he said, his movements subsiding.

"And do I have good manners?"

"The best!" said Robert, puzzled. "Absolutely the best, Marie."

"Then why don't you take me to the next Yacht Club dance?" she said.

Robert became as rigid as Marie. "To the Yacht Club?" he said. "To the Pisquontuit Pisquontuit Yacht Club?" Yacht Club?"

"That's the one," said Marie.

"What she's asking, Robert," I said helpfully, "is, are you a man or a mouse? Are you going to take her to the Yacht Club dance, or does she go out of your life forever and into the airplane factory?"

"They need a good girl at the airplane factory," said Marie.

"I never saw a better one," I said.

"They're not ashamed of their girls over at the airplane factory," said Marie. "They have picnics and Christmas parties and wedding showers and all kinds of things, and the foremen and the vice presidents and the works manager and the comptroller and all come to the parties and dance with the girls and have a fine time. My girlfriend gets taken out regularly everywhere by the comptroller."

"What's the comptroller?" said Robert, fighting for time.

"I don't know," said Marie, "except he works works for a living, and he isn't any closet lover." for a living, and he isn't any closet lover."

Robert was stung speechless.

"Man or mouse?" I said, bringing the issue back into focus.

Robert chewed his lip, and at last murmured something we couldn't understand.

"What was that?" said Marie.

"Mouse," said Robert with a sigh. "I said mouse."

"Mouse," said Marie softly.

"Don't say it that that way," said Robert desolately. way," said Robert desolately.

"What other way is there to say mouse?" said Marie. "Good night."

I followed her out into the hall. "Well," I said, "it's been rough on him, but-"

"Marie-" said Robert, appearing in the doorway, wan. "You wouldn't like it. You'd hate it. You'd have a terrible time. Everybody has a terrible time. That's why I said mouse."

"As long as there's music," said Marie, "and the gentleman is proud of his lady, nothing else matters."

"Um," said Robert. He disappeared into the sitting room again, and we heard the couch springs creak.

"You were saying-?" said Marie.

"I was saying it was a rough thing to put him through," I said to Marie, "but it'll do him a world of good in the long run. This will eat into him for years, and there's a good chance he'll become the first rounded human being in Pisquontuit history. A long, slow, profound double take."

"Listen," said Marie. "He's talking to himself. What's he saying?"

"Mouse, mouse, mouse," said Robert. "Mouse, mouse-"

"We've lit the fuse," I whispered, "on a spiritual time bomb."

"Mouse, man, mouse, man-" said Robert.

"Couple of years from now," I said, "kaboom!"

"Man!" shouted Robert. "Man, man, man!" He was on his feet, charging out into the hall. "Man!" he said savagely, and he bent Marie over backwards, kissing her hotly. He straightened her up and pulled her after him down the stairs to the second floor.

I followed them down, appalled.

"Robert," gasped Marie. "Please, what's going on?"

Robert pounded on his parents' bedroom door. "You'll see," he said. "I'm going to tell all the world you're mine!"

"Robert-listen," I said, "maybe you ought to cool off first, and-"

"Aha! The great mouse exposer!" he said wildly. He knocked me down. "How was that for a mouse tap?" He pounded on the door again. "Out of the sack in there!"

"I don't want to be yours," said Marie.

"We'll go out West somewhere," said Robert, "and raise Herefords or soybeans."

"I just wanted to go to a Yacht Club dance," piped Marie fearfully.

"Don't you understand?" said Robert. "I'm yours!"

"But I'm his," said Marie, pointing to me. She twisted away from Robert and ran upstairs to her room, with Robert on her heels. She slammed her door and locked it.

I stood slowly, rubbing my bruised cheek.

Mr. and Mrs. Brewer's bedroom door opened suddenly. Mr. Brewer stood in the doorway, glaring at me, his tongue between his teeth. "Well?" he said.

"I uh-up wupp," I said. I smiled gla.s.sily. "Never mind, sir."

"Never mind!" he bellowed. "You beat on the door like the world's coming to an end, and now you say never mind. Are you drunk?"

"Nossir."

"Well, neither am I," he said. "My mind's clear as a bell, and you're fired." He slammed the door.

I went back to Robert's and my suite and began packing. Robert was lying on the couch again, staring at the ceiling.

"She's packing, too," he said.

"Oh?"

"I guess you'll be getting married, eh?"

"Looks that way. I'll have to find another job."

"Count your blessings," he said. "Here, but for the grace of G.o.d, lie you."

"Calmed down, have you?" I said.

"I'm still through with Pisquontuit," he said.

"I think you're wise," I said.