I was trying to make a statement, get something out of the case that I somehow got myself into. Dad had ordered me to get back, department will rea.s.sign me to the force. Needless to say, doing that would result me abandoning everything here.

And by 'everything' I now also include a new addition of a 7 year old boy whose sudden appearance knocked me down with a feather.

When I got back from Barry's I didn't expect anyone to be in the apartment as Shen was supposed to be at his part time job. But those loud commotions coming out of my room could be heard all the way down from the hallway made me realise I was wrong. It mainly consisted the voices of Shen and a woman. Just as I was about to get inside the conversation went into a direction which I never could've imagined or had any clue about.

-And we just continued to throw fake smiles to each other's face every morning after those nights as if nothing happened...G.o.d...

-Listen, I know okay!! This is...messed up...I, I can't believe...

-Wow..now it's all messed up to you!? YOU COWARD!! Do you know how much I had to sacrifice? How much was I ridiculed?

-...

-It...it wasn't until too late I became aware of...my pregnancy. Rather, I had known everything but refused to believe it. But reality started to crumble over me. This was something I had to face all by myself. Moments I spent in despair, not knowing what I should do. Sulking, isolating myself...I didn't have anyone to turn to. And where were you? You just disappeared!

-I had no intention of leaving you particularly. I just wanted to be free. Somewhere...that feels like a home.

-And what about me?? What about...him?

-Can you please stop now? We should talk later...rather we shouldn't actually, ever.

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-d.a.m.n you!! Shou! Let's go.

-c.r.a.p! Hey? Wait! That's not what I...just listen to me?

-Why did I even bother to find you? Shou? Come on.

I was standing right there outside of my room, trying to get a grasp over the situation in my mind. From a general perspective I could a.s.sume the obvious but then again I couldn't think of it as simple as that cause it couldn't be that I belonged to that general category after being together with him.