In case you guys forgot, ‘eat’ is probably the most common euphemism for ‘s.e.x’ in j.a.panese.

Ladies(レディース) is a term in j.a.panese that can refer to all-female delinquent biker gangs.

“By the way, Tilea-chan?”

“What is it?”

“This time it’s my turn to wonder… What is that stick that you’ve been carrying around?”

“T-, This is――”

“Hmph. Garbage. This is a weapon called the Killer Nunchaku, used to unleash techniques far beyond anything you could ever accomplish. A divine artifact created by Tilea-sama herself.”

Ah-, idiot!? Loser(Bizef) isn’t a chuunibyou, so if you say something like that…

“Pfft-, AHAHAHAHA! K-, Killer Nunchaku!? And what’s more, a weapon that Tilea-chan created is a divine artifact? Y-, You’re killing me!”

Dammnit!

He burst into laughter at me, just like I thought. Apparently the Killer Nunchaku was hilarious.

Loser(Bizef) rolled about on the ground, guffawing as he held his sides.

“Tilea-sama. I believe we should kill this garbage after all. Part of your strategy though he may be, this is too disrespectful!”

“Niel, I told you, didn’t I. For the sake of the great plan, we need to endure.”

“As expected of Tilea-sama. Treating everybody without haughtiness, no matter how diminutive they might be. In other words, we need at least this much mettle and prudence in order to succeed in taking the world, correct?”

“Yes, yes, exactly as you say. For the sake of spreading my banner across the land, you need to behave, okay?”

“Understood! Even you are bearing with this humiliation. I shall also bear with it.”

And so, just as I managed to stop Pervert(Nielsen), Loser(Bizef) slowly got up from rolling about in laughter.

“Hahh~ That was a good one.”

d.a.m.ned Loser(Bizef). Looks like he’s finally stopped laughing. But that grin is still on his face. You don’t need to laugh that much…

“Bizef-san, you laughed too much.”

“Sorry, sorry. Pfft-, K-, Killer Nunchaku, was it? Did you create it especially for today, Tilea-chan?”

“Y-, Yes.”

Uu~ I’m starting to feel even more embarra.s.sed now. So this really is how normal people are supposed to respond. Because Pervert(Nielsen) praised me so much, I ended up getting ahead of myself.

“Aah~ Tilea-chan, you don’t have to blush so much. I won’t laugh at you anymore. As an apology, I’ll enchant your weapon.”

“Really!?”

Ooh~ Well this is a windfall. It’s true that I’d still be nervous with just a metal rod. It’d be great if it he gave it some dignity with a magic enchantment.

“Hey, pa.s.s it over for a moment.”

“Here.”

I handed the nunchaku to Loser(Bizef) and he began to chant some kind of incantation. Then, the nunchaku was wrapped in some kind of magical light in its entirety.

“Phew~ Alright. I gave it an attack enchantment so it should add to your attack power. Only, maybe I got a little too into it. The destructive power has gone up quite a bit, so be careful how you use it, okay?”

“Garbage, just how helpful are you saying such a level of support magic will be! Before Tilea-sama’s mighty power, it is naught but dregs. Nothing more than adding one to a million!”

Aah~ Pervert(Nielsen) is picking a fight again. Even though I warned him so much. Or could it be that this already counts as enduring it for Pervert(Nielsen)?

“Tilea-chan, I got it. It’s true that getting angry at a guy like this would be immature. Honestly, I already have no idea what he’s on about anymore.”

“Please don’t mind Niel. More importantly, thank you very much for the magic enchantment.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine. More importantly, you really need to be careful when you use it, okay?”

“I know. Unless it comes down to it, I won’t be using this weapon.”

“Heh! Tilea-chan. As long as I’m here, it never will.”

S-, So annoying…

Even after that, Loser(Bizef) continued boasting about his skill. And Pervert(Nielsen) being Pervert(Nielsen) picked a fight with Loser(Bizef) whenever he could.

Well, it seems that Loser(Bizef) won’t respond in kind anymore, so it probably won’t turn physical but…

Huu~ Seems like I’m exhausted even before facing the dokyun. The two of them recklessly quarrelled like we were going to a picnic or something. We’re going to pick a fight with some dokyun, you know. Even though the chance that things will get violent is plenty high, you guys are…

Don’t they understand how serious this is?

Anyway, while I was worrying like that for a while as we were waiting, I suddenly heard the earth tremble, DO DO DO DO.

What is that? What’s that sound?

What’s this sound that feels like the earth is rumbling…?

I strained my eyes and looked in the direction of the quaking.

TOBYYAAAAAAAAH!

What surprised me, you ask? Well yes, the three of them came. Just as expected, the Demonic Evil Three came. But what was surprising was the mounts they were riding on. They weren’t any normal mounts. Instead they were some kind of scary looking sabertooth tiger-type things.

Could this also be illusion magic? Like, maybe they’re actually just chihuahuas…?

No, that’s wrong. I shouldn’t be optimistic here. These guys are dokyun. In this world, there aren’t any motorbikes. So instead of motorbikes, I bet the dokyun of this world ride mounts. Honestly, I have no idea where the h.e.l.l they got these from, but they’re as dangerous as you can get.

In my past life, dokyun would rampage around on remodelled motorbikes. Then could it be that the status symbol for dokyun in this world is how scary a motorbike(mount) they can get?

This is bad. This is super bad!

If they sic such a crazy pet on me, no matter how many lives I have it won’t be enough.

While I was breaking into a cold sweat, the dokyun got off their mounts and came this way. It seems that they have no intention of siccing them.

――I see!

To these guys, their motorbikes(mounts) are like their precious cars. It’d be terrible if by some chance they got hurt while being sicced on us, right? I was relieved for now.

After that, the dokyun closed in one us, step by step, before finally appearing in front of me.

T-, These guys are the Demonic Evil Three――

I-, I underestimated them…

I really underestimated the dokyun in this world.

I’m stupid. There’s no Sword and Firearms Law in this world.

To begin with… what the heck is that dragonoid?

He’s freaking holding some ma.s.sive blade. Right, almost like an Azure Dragon Crescent Blade. Did he come out here to take the heads of a thousand generals?

ARE YOU GUAN YU OR SOMETHINGGGGGG!

And that beastman…

ISN’T HE BASICALLY A TIGER ALREADYYYYY!

No, seriously, he isn’t something cute like 『Torajirou』. It’s so crazy that he looks capable of swallowing a person whole. Just how relieved would I be if that were just a mask.

And the last person…

Why is she wrapped head to toe in flames? Is she trying to emphasize “I’m a magcian yanno!” or something like that?

And what’s more, she’s kind of cute.

For now I’ll call them “Dragon Dokyun”, “Tiger Dokyun” and “Flame Dokyun” I guess. Each and every one of them seems to be a difficult person with a few quirks. They definitely don’t look like somebody I can beat. It would be best to leave it to the in-name-only Guard Captain.

“B-, Bizef-san, it’s time to redeem yourself. Come, please give them a warning!”

I tried to tap Loser(Bizef)’s shoulder. But there was n.o.body there.

Huu~ I expected this, but…

I looked down.

…So you really did faint.

Loser(Bizef) was once again lying there with his eyes rolled back.

You know, I think you should just change your job already. You could only do your work so far because nothing big happened in a country town like Beruga, right?

The “Demonic Evil Three” certainly had intensity. The dokyun of this world were so intense that it would be no mystery for people to call them “Demons”. I felt like I was going to wet myself. But you know, for a former adventurer to be scared of them…?

――Or rather, you definitely weren’t an adventurer, were you!

He was probably something like a club-manager to a famous adventurer party. I’m certain he never actually headed to the frontlines. There’s no mistake that he just did things like taking care of the paperwork or collecting medicinal herbs, and thanks to the achievements of his friends, he rose to C-Rank.

I had always found it strange that somebody with a splendid t.i.tle like C-Rank adventurer would work as the Guard Captain of a hick town like Beruga, but to think that there was that trick behind it. In a countryside town like Beruga, his actual ability wouldn’t be revealed. If bandits or brigands decided to attack, it would’ve been bad, huh?

…Just lie there and sleep. I’ll take care of the rest somehow.

I moved Loser(Bizef) to the side, before facing off the dokyun.

“Hmph. Human, to lose consciousness due to my press――”

“Yes, yes, you used haki as well, right? I get it already.”

Why do all of these people always give the same reaction? Well, I guess if somebody coincidentally fainted near me in my past life, perhaps I might have said the same thing though…

“What is this ‘haky’?”

“That doesn’t matter, right? More importantly, are you guys the rumoured Demonic Evil Three?”

“Indeed. Are you the Evil G.o.d feared by Hidler?”

“Aah~ Is that the setting we’re going with? Fine then. I am Evil G.o.d Tilea-sama. And so, what’s your purpose in coming here? Timu――or Camilla rather, I bet you didn’t just come here to complain to her, right!”

“Indeed. We desired to eat the rumoured Evil G.o.d, you see.”

“Yes. I came here because I wanted to know what kind of taste the Evil G.o.d had.”

“Haha, we’re gunna eat the Evil G.o.d!”

Wha-!? T-, They’re going to ‘eat’ me!?

I knew they would be sc.u.mbags!

They were thinking about indecent things, just like I suspected.

And eating me? They’re so blunt with their l.u.s.t. I don’t come cheap, you know!

Of course, just picturing it with the men is enough to give me the s.h.i.+vers. My body might be a woman’s, but my mind is definitely a man’s. And it’s a beastman and dragonoid, you know! h.o.m.o, and then b.e.s.t.i.a.lity on top of that? Just how badly are they trying to traumatise me.

Ah, but there was a girl too, wasn’t there. She’s pretty cute, so I might actually want to try being eaten by her…

――Whoa-, not good, not good!

She’s a dokyun. Like a Ladies. Not someone you want to get involved with.

Anyway, I sure was naive. I predicted that they would have ulterior motives, but for them to suddenly tell me straight up that they’re going to “attack” me is…

They really are too blunt with their l.u.s.t. These guys aren’t somebody I can deal with alone. It looks like it isn’t the time to be caring about appearances anymore.

Begin the final strategy!

I’ll get help from everybody in town. I need to have Pervert(Nielsen) run away with Timu, after all.

“Niel, the final strategy――”

“I shall not forgive your remarks against Tilea-sama!”

Pervert(Nielsen) roared that as he struck at the dokyun.

Idiot, don’t be so hasty!

Before I had time to stop him, Pervert(Nielsen) attacked the dokyun but――

“Sluggis.h.!.+”

“Guhah-!”

Just like I thought, Tiger Dokyun took him down in one punch.

As expected, huh…

No, but even so, he got angry for my sake, right? He was a lot braver than Loser(Bizef) to face people like that. I’ve bettered my opinion of you a little.

“Hahh, kuh-, I-, I, can still…”

Despite the damage he took, Pervert(Nielsen) desperately tried to stand. No, I’ll acknowledge your guts, but don’t force yourself. Dokyun have no common sense, so I bet that guy hit him without holding back. Since it was the feeble Pervert(Nielsen), even one punch might have broken his bones.

“Niel, you don’t need to force yourself. Leave it to me.”

“T-, Tilea-sama, my deepest apolo――”

Perhaps relieved by my words, Pervert(Nielsen) collapsed on the spot.

“Ku ku, that guy was 『Iron Wall』 Nielsen, yeah?”

“Who is that? I haven’t heard of them.”

“Indeed. I have no interest in the weak.”

Each of the dokyun sneered at Pervert(Nielsen).

Saying whatever they want, huh. As expected of dokyun. They don’t even hesitate to hit people.

“But yanno, even though I was so lookin’ forward to that Evil G.o.d that scared Hidler…”

“Indeed. Their mana is too feeble. I cannot imagine them to be strong.”

“Suzaku, you see how much mana they have?”

“Let me see. The mana welling up from her is roughly 300. Even if we suppose that she could increase it, I would have to say 5,000 at best.”

“5,000 you say? My belly will not even feel it. Cursed Hidler! Sending us here for a thing of this level!”

“Evil G.o.d-, wait, no, you’re just a normal human, yeah? You sure had bad luck, huh. We’re in a terrible mood right now. You’re in for a rough time.”

“Please don’t expect an easy death. We’re going to have some fun.”

The dokyun gave ferocious smiles as they approached.

“Talking it out――seems impossible now, huh…”

“What? You already desire to capitulate? How dull. It seems that you will not last much of our fun.”

“Yeah. Now that it’s come to this, guess we gotta play with Camilla instead.”

Wha-!? They’re going to lay their hands on not just me, but Timu as well? Timu is still only fourteen, you know. Wait, but in this world without regulations, I guess you can do it as much as you want. This isn’t just some joke anymore. It’s a crime!

“You know, I’ve always wanted to eat that Camilla chick.”

The dokyun gave vulgar guffaws. They’re even going to lay their hands on a child like Timu. No wonder Hidler expelled them. They’re complete sc.u.mbags.

“I’m not going to forgive you guys.”

“Huh? We’re in a bad mood right now. You forget that!?”

“Aah~ Is that so. I’m also in a reallly bad mood. Seems like we’ll get along.”

“Human, do not presume that you will die a simple death after slighting us!”

“Yes. You really need to learn your place.”

“I should be saying that about you guys. Don’t get so ahead of yourselves just because you made Loser(Bizef) faint.”

My provocation met with the dokyun’s bloodl.u.s.t, and the atmosphere turned critical.

“”You’re going to die!””

That shout from both sides served as the signal that raised the curtains on my battle with the Demonic Evil Three.