'No,no.Itisnotthatatall.It'sacaseoftheroutinehabitsofthehumananimal.Thatisveryimportant.AndthedeadM.Gascoignedoesnotfitin.Itisallwrong,yousee.'
'Ireallydon'tunderstand.'
HerculePoirotmurmured:'Thetroubleis,thereistoomuchsauceoverthebadfish.'
'Mydearsir?'
HerculePoirotsmiled.
'Youwillbehavingmelockedupasalunaticsoon,MonsieurleDocteur.ButIamnotreallyamentalcase-justamanwhohasalikingfororderandmethodandwhoisworriedwhenhecomesacrossafactthatdoesnotfitin.Imustaskyoutoforgivemeforhavinggivenyousomuchtrouble.'
Heroseandthedoctorrosealso.
'Youknow,'saidMacAndrew,'honestly,Ican'tseeanythingtheleastbitsuspiciousaboutthedeathofHenryGascoigne.Isayhefell-yousaysomebodypushedhim.It'sall-well-intheair.'
HerculePoirotsighed.
'Yes,'hesaid.'Itisworkmanlike.Somebodyhasmadethegoodjobofit!'
'Youstillthink-'
Thelittlemanspreadouthishands.
"I'man.o.bstinateman-amanwithalittleidea-andnothingtosupport.i.t!Bytheway,didHenryGascoignehavefalseteeth?'
'No,hisownteethwereinexcellentpreservation.Verycreditableindeedathisage.'
'Helookedafterthemwell-theywerewhiteandwellbrushed?'
'Yes,Inoticedthemparticularly.Teethtendtogrowalittleyellowasonegrowsolder,b.u.t.theywereingoodcondition.'
'Notdiscolouredinanyway?'
'No.Idon'tthinkhewasasmokerifthatiswhatyoumean.'
'Ididnotmeanthatprecisely-itwasjustalongshot-whichprobablywillnotcomeoff!Goodbye,DrMacAndrew,andthankyouforyourkindness.'
Heshookthedoctor'shandanddeparted.
'Andnow,'hesaid,'forthelongshot.'
AttheGallantEndeavour,hesatdownatthesametablewhichhehadsharedwithBonnington.ThegirlwhoservedhimwasnotMolly.Molly,thegirltoldhim,wasawayonaholiday.
ItwasonlyjustsevenandHerculePoirotfoundnodifficultyinenteringintoconversationwiththegirlonthesubjectofoldMrGascoigne.
'Yes,'shesaid.'He'dbeenhereforyearsandyears.Butnoneofusgirlseverknewhisname.Wesawabouttheinquestinthepaper,andtherewasapictureofhim."There,"IsaidtoMolly."Ifthatisn'tour'OldFatherTime'"asweusedtocallhim.'
'Hedinedhereontheeveningofhisdeath,didhenot?'
'That'sright,Thursday,thethird.HewasalwayshereonaThursday.TuesdaysandThursdayspunctualasaclock.'
'Youdon'tremember,Isuppose,whathehadfordinner?'
'Nowletmesee,itwasmulligatawnysoup,that'sright,andbeefsteakpuddingorwasitthemutton?-nopudding,that'sright,andblackberryandapplepieandcheese.Andthentothinkofhimgoinghomeandfallingdownthosestairsthatverysameevening.Afrayeddressing-gowncordtheysaiditwasascausedit.Ofcourse,hisclotheswerealwayssomethingawful-old-fashionedandputonanyhow,andalltattered,andyethehadakindofair,allthesame,asthoughhewa.s.somebody!Oh,wegetallsortsofinterestingcustomershere.'
Shemovedoff.
HerculePoirotatehisfilletedsole.Hiseyesshowedagreenlight.
'Itisodd,'hesaidtohimself,'howthecleverestpeopleslipoverdetails.Bonningtonwillbeinterested.'
b.u.t.thetimehadnotyetcomeforleisurelydiscussionwithBonnington.
Armedwithintroductionsfromacertaininfluentialquarter,HerculePoirotfoundnodifficultyatallindealingwiththecoronerforthedistrict.
'Acuriousfigure,thedeceasedmanGascoigne,'heobserved.'Alonely,eccentricoldfellow.Buthisdeceaseseemstoarouseanunusualamountofattention?'
Helookedwithsomecuriosityathisvisitorashespoke.
HerculePoirotchosehiswordscarefully.'Therearecirc.u.mstancesconnectedwithit,Monsieur,whichmakeinvestigationdesirable.'
'Well,howcanIhelpyou?'
'Itis,Ibelieve,withinyourprovincetoorderdoc.u.mentsproducedinyourcourttobedestroyed,ortobeimpounded-asyouthinkfit.AcertainletterwasfoundinthepocketofHenryGascoigne'sdressing-gown,wasitnot?'
'Thatisso.'
'Aletterfromhisnephew,DrGeorgeLorrimer?'
'Quitecorrect.Theletterwasproducedattheinquestashelpingtofixthetimeofdeath.'
'Whichwascorroboratedbythemedicalevidence?'
'Exactly.'
'Isthatletterstillavailable?'
HerculePoirotwaitedratheranxiouslyforthereply.
Whenheheardthattheletterwa.s.stillavailableforexaminationhedrewasighofrelief.Whenitwasfinallyproducedhestudieditwithsomecare.Itwaswritteninaslightlycrampedhandwritingwithastylographicpen.Itranasfollows: DearUncleHenry, IamsorrytotellyouthatIhavehadnosuccessasregardsUncleAnthony.Heshowednoenthusiasmforavisitfromyouandwouldgivemenoreplytoyourrequestthathewouldletbygonesbebygones.Heis,ofcourse,extremelyill,andhismindisinclinedtowander.Ishouldfancythattheendisverynear.Heseemedhardlytorememberwhoyouwere.
Iamsorrytohavefailedyou,butIcana.s.sureyouthatIdidmybest.
Youraffectionatenephew, GeorgeLorrimer Theletteritselfwasdated3rdNovember.Poirotglancedattheenvelope'spostmark-4.30p.m.3Nov.
Hemurmured:'Itisbeautifullyinorder,isitnot?'
KingstonHillwashisnextobjective.Afteralittletrouble,withtheexerciseofgood-humouredpertinacity,heobtainedaninterviewwithAmeliaHill,cook-housekeepertothelateAnthonyGascoigne.
MrsHillwasinclinedtobestiffandsuspiciousatfirst,b.u.t.thecharminggenialityofthisstrange-lookingforeignerwouldhavehaditseffectonastone.MrsAmeliaHillbegantounbend.Shefoundherself,ashadsomanyotherwomenbeforeher,pouringouthertroublestoareallysympatheticlistener.ForfourteenyearsshehadhadchargeofMrGascoigne'shousehold-notaneasyjob!No,indeed!Manyawomanwouldhavequailedundertheburdensshehadhadtobear!Eccentricthepoorgentlemanwasandnodenyingit.Remarkablyclosewithhismoney-akindofmaniawithhimitwas-andheasrichagentlemanasmightbe!ButMrsHillhadservedhimfaithfully,andputupwithhisways,andnaturallyshe'dexpectedatanyratearemembrance.Butno-nothingatall!Justanoldwillthatleftallhismoneytohiswifeandifshepredeceasedhimtheneverythingtohisbrother,Henry.Awillmadeyearsago.Itdidn'tseemfair!
GraduallyHerculePoirotdetachedherfromhermainthemeofunsatisfiedcupidity.Itwasindeedaheartlessinjustice!MrsHillcouldnotbeblamedforfeelinghurtandsurprised.ItwaswellknownthatMrGascoignewastight-fistedaboutmoney.Ithadevenbeensaidthatthedeadmanhadrefusedhisonlybrothera.s.sistance.MrsHillprobablyknewallaboutthat.
'WasitthatthatDrLorrimercametoseehimabout?'askedMrsHill.'Iknewitwa.s.somethingabouthisbrother,but.i.thought.i.twasjustthathisbrotherwantedtobereconciled.They'dquarrelledyearsago.'
'Iunderstand,'saidPoirot,'thatMrGascoignerefusedabsolutely?'
'That'srightenough,'saidMrsHillwithanod.'"Henry?"hesays,ratherweaklike."What'sthisaboutHenry?Haven'tseenhimforyearsanddon'twantto.Quarrelsomefellow,Henry."Justthat.'
TheconversationthenrevertedtoMrsHill'sownspecialgrievances,andtheunfeelingatt.i.tudeofthelateMrGascoigne'ssolicitor.
WithsomedifficultyHerculePoirottookhisleavewithoutbreakingofftheconversationtooabruptly.
Andso,justafterthedinnerhour,hecametoElmcrest,DorsetRoad,Wimbledon,theresidenceofDrGeorgeLorrimer.
Thedoctorwasin.HerculePoirotwa.s.shownintothesurgeryandtherepresentlyDrGeorgeLorrimercametohim,obviouslyjustrisenfromthedinnertable.
'I'mnotapatient,Doctor,'saidHerculePoirot.'Andmycominghereis,perhaps,somewhatofanimpertinence-butI'manoldmanandIbelieveinplainanddirectdealing.Idonotcareforlawyersandtheirlong-windedroundaboutmethods.'
HehadcertainlyarousedLorrimer'sinterest.Thedoctorwasaclean-shavenmanofmiddleheight.Hishairwasbrown,buthiseyelasheswerealmostwhitewhichgavehiseyesapale,boiledappearance.Hismannerwasbriskandnotwithouthumour.
'Lawyers?'hesaid,raisinghiseyebrows.'Hatethefellows!Yourousemycuriosity,mydearsir.Praysitdown.'
Poirotdidsoandthenproducedoneofhisprofessionalcardswhichhehandedtothedoctor.
GeorgeLorrimer'swhiteeyelashesblinked.
Poirotleanedforwardconfidentially.'Agoodmanyofmyclientsarewomen,'hesaid.
'Naturally,'saidDrGeorgeLorrimer,withaslighttwinkle.
'Asyousay,naturally,'agreedPoirot.'Womendistrusttheofficialpolice.Theypreferprivateinvestigations.Theydonotwanttohavetheirtroublesmadepublic.Anelderlywomancametoconsultmeafewdaysago.Shewasunhappyaboutahusbandshe'dquarrelledwithmanyyearsbefore.Thishusbandofherswasyouruncle,thelateMrGascoigne.'
GeorgeLorrimer'sfacewentpurple.
'Myuncle?Nonsense!Hiswifediedmanyyearsago.'
'Notyouruncle,MrAnthonyGascoigne.Youruncle,MrHenryGascoigne.'
'UncleHenry?Buthewasn'tmarried!'
'Ohyes,hewas,'saidHerculePoirot,lyingunblushingly.'Notadoubtofit.Theladyevenbroughtalonghermarriagecertificate.'
'It'salie!'criedGeorgeLorrimer.Hisfacewasnowaspurpleasaplum.'Idon'tbelieveit.You'reanimpudentliar.'
'Itis...o...b..d,isitnot?'saidPoirot.'Youhavecommittedmurderfornothing.'
'Murder?'Lorrimer'svoicequavered.Hispaleeyesbulgedwithterror.
'Bytheway,'saidPoirot,'Iseeyouhavebeeneatingblackberrytartagain.Anunwisehabit.Blackberriesaresaidtobefullofvitamins,b.u.t.theymaybedeadlyinotherways.OnthisoccasionIratherfancytheyhavehelpedtoputaroperoundaman'sneck-yourneck,DrLorrimer.'
'Yousee,monami,whereyouwentwrongwasoveryourfundamentala.s.sumption.'HerculePoirot,beamingplacidlyacrossthetableathisfriend,wavedanexpositoryhand.'Amanunderseverementalstressdoesn'tchoosethattimetodosomethingthathe'sneverdonebefore.Hisreflexesjustfollowthetrackofleastresistance.Amanwhoisupsetaboutsomethingmightconceivablycomedowntodinnerdressedinhispyjamas-b.u.t.theywillbehisownpyjamas-notsomebodyelse's.
'Amanwhodislikesthicksoup,suetpuddingandblackberriessuddenlyordersallthreeoneevening.Yousay,becauseheisthinkingofsomethingelse.ButIsaythatamanwhohasgotsomethingonhismindwillorderautomaticallythedishhehasorderedmostoftenbefore.
'Ehbien,then,whatotherexplanationcouldtherebe?Isimplycouldnotthinkofareasonableexplanation.AndIwasworried!Theincidentwasallwrong.Itdidnotfit!IhaveanorderlymindandIlikethingstofit.MrGascoigne'sdinnerorderworriedme.
'Thenyoutoldmethatthemanhaddisappeared.HehadmissedaTuesdayandaThursdaythefirsttimeforyears.Ilikedthatevenless.Aqueerhypothesissprangupinmymind.IfIwererightabout.i.tthemanwasdead.Imadeinquiries.Themanwasdead.Andhewasveryneatlyandtidilydead.Inotherwordsthebadfishwascoveredupwiththesauce!
'HehadbeenseenintheKing'sRoadatseveno'clock.Hehadhaddinnerhereatseven-thirty-twohoursbeforehedied.Itallfittedin-theevidenceofthestomachcontents,theevidenceoftheletter.Muchtoomuchsauce!Youcouldn'tseethefishatall!
'Devotednephewwrotetheletter,devotednephewhadbeautifulalibifortimeofdeath.Deathverysimple-afalldownthestairs.Simpleaccident?Simplemurder?Everyonesaystheformer.
'Devotednephewonlysurvivingrelative.Devotednephewwillinherit-butisthereanythingtoinherit?Unclenotoriouslypoor.
'b.u.t.thereisabrother.Andbrotherinhistimehadhadmarriedarichwife.AndbrotherlivesinabigrichhouseonKingstonHill,soitwouldseemthatrichwifemusthavelefthimallhermoney.Youseethesequence-richwifeleavesmoneytoAnthony,AnthonyleavesmoneytoHenry,Henry'smoneygoestoGeorge-acompletechain.'
'Allveryprettyintheory,'saidBonnington.'Butwhatdidyoudo?'
'Onceyouknow-youca.n.u.suallygetholdofwhatyouwant.Henryhaddiedtwohoursafterameal-thatisalltheinquestreallybotheredabout.Butsupposingthemealwasnotdinner,butlunch.PutyourselfinGeorge'splace.Georgewantsmoney-badly.AnthonyGascoigneisdying-buthisdeathisnogoodtoGeorge.HismoneygoestoHenry,andHenryGascoignemayliveforyears.SoHenrymustdietoo-andthesoonerthebetter-buthisdeathmusttakeplaceafterAnthony's,andatthesametimeGeorgemusthavea.n.a.libi.Henry'shabitofdiningregularlyatarestaurantontwoeveningsoftheweeksuggesta.n.a.libitoGeorge.Beingacautiousfellow,hetrieshisplanoutfirst.HeimpersonateshisuncleonMondayeveningattherestaurantinquestion.Itgoeswithoutahitch.Everyonethereacceptshimashisuncle.Heissatisfied.HehasonlytowaittillUncleAnthonyshowsdefinitesignsofpeggingout.Thetimecomes.HewritesalettertohisuncleontheafternoonofthesecondNovemberbutdatesitthethird.Hecomesuptotownontheafternoonofthethird,callsonhisuncle,andcarrieshisschemeintoaction.AsharpshoveanddownthestairsgoesUncleHenry.Georgehuntsaboutfortheletterhehaswritten,andshovesitinthepocketofhisuncle'sdressing-gown.Atseven-thirtyheisattheGallantEndeavour,beard,bushyeyebrowsallcomplete.UndoubtedlyMrHenryGascoigneisaliveatseven-thirty.ThenarapidmetamorphosisinalavatoryandbackfullspeedinhiscartoWimbledonandaneveningofbridge.Theperfectalibi.'
MrBonningtonlookedathim.
'b.u.t.thepostmarkontheletter?'
'Oh,thatwasverysimple.Thepostmarkwa.s.smudgy.Why?IthadbeenalteredwithlampblackfromsecondNovembertothirdNovember.Youwouldnotnoticeitunlessyouwerelookingforit.Andfinallythereweretheblackbirds.'
'Blackbirds?'
'Four-and-twentyblackbirdsbakedinapie!Orblack-berriesifyouprefertobeliteral!George,youcomprehend,wasafterallnotquiteagoodenoughactor.DoyourememberthefellowwhoblackedhimselfallovertoplayOth.e.l.lo?Thatisthekindofactoryouhavegottobeincrime.Georgelookedlikehisuncleandwalkedlikehisuncleandspokelikehisuncleandhadhisuncles'beardandeyebrows,butheforgottoeatlikehisuncle.Heorderedthedishesthathehimselfliked.Blackberriesdiscolourtheteeth-thecorpse'steethwerenotdiscoloured,andyetHenryGascoigneateblackberriesattheGallantEndeavourthatnight.b.u.t.thereweren.o.blackberriesinthestomach.Iaskedthismorning.AndGeorgehadbeenfoolenoughtokeepthebeardandtherestofthemake-up.Oh!plentyofevidenceonceyoulookforit.IcalledonGeorgeandrattledhim.Thatfinishedit!Hehadbeeneatingblackberriesagain,bytheway.Agreedyfellow-caredalotabouthisfood.Ehbien,greedwillhanghimallrightunlessIamverymuchmistaken.'
Awaitressbroughtthemtwoportionsofblackberryandappletart.
'Takeitaway,'saidMrBonnington.'Onecan'tbetoocareful.Bringmeasmallhelpingofsagopudding.'
TheLoveDetectives
LittleMrSatterthwaitelookedthoughtfullyacrossathishost.