Chapter 5992 Tusa's Anxieties

When Tusa looked back at his academy days, he thought of the central struggle that defined his teenage years.

Mech cadets with C-grade genetic apt.i.tudes were not special at all. They were so common and dispensable that they needed to rely on other strengths in order to earn higher grades.

It was during those days that Tusa learned that being a Larkinson was not so great after all. Every fellow cadet looked at him and the handful of other Larkinsons among them with a lot of expectations.

It was as if the mech cadets were absolutely convinced that Larkinsons such as Tusa would be able to vanquish them in sparring sessions and reach the top of the ranking of their cla.s.s!

Though growing up in the Larkinson Family indeed granted Tusa a lot of advantages, none of that translated into exceptional performance in any of his cla.s.ses.

His fellow cadets soon began to change their faces when they encountered him. Though they did not harbor any ill intent towards a descendant of a notable military family, Tusa did not like their glances in the slightest.

He could guess their thoughts from the faint signs of doubt and content from their expressions.

They thought that Tusa was not good enough to bear the Larkinson name.

They dismissed Tusa as a talentless descendant who would never be able to make the Larkinsons proud.

They began to a.s.sume that the Larkinsons weren't as good as everyone thought. Perhaps the media constantly hyped them up in order to keep up morale whenever the Bright-Vesia Wars flared up again.

Tusa initially did not bear the weight of disappointment well.

His mood deteriorated and he found it harder to make friends with other cadets.

Commiserating with other Larkinsons cadets did not help that much either. It turned out that he was not the only member of the Larkinson Family who had to meet people's inflated expectations.

These were the days when Tusa treated his Larkinson name as a burden rather than a blessing.

Fortunately, the Larkinson Family was not ignorant of this problem. It had built up its reputation over many generations. Many descendants attended mech academies on Rittersberg and elsewhere, and there were always family members who discovered the downsides of bearing a famous name.

His name brought him far more grief than benefits as a young teenager looking to prove himself found himself unable to do as people already cast their judgment based on his disappointing cla.s.s performance!

Fortunately, the Larkinson Family was not ignorant of this problem. It had built up its reputation over many generations. Many descendants attended mech academies on Rittersberg and elsewhere, and there were always family members who discovered the downsides of bearing a famous name.

During his stay at the Larkinson Estate, an uncle approached Tusa one day.

The older man looked down at the mech cadet that was sitting in the back garden of the Larkinson Estate as if he was an abandoned son.

"It is hard, isn't it, Tusa?"

The morose teenage potentate sighed. "Is this what every Larkinson has to endure when they enter a mech academy?"

"Not every Larkinson. Only the normal ones. There are only a few genuinely gifted ones who possess both talent and discipline. In my generation, Ark Larkinson stood out as the leader of us all. With his B+ genetic apt.i.tude, he breezed through all of the piloting cla.s.ses and won almost every sparring session. He also lived up to Elder Benjamin's legacy by being diligent and studious enough to rank at the top of his theoretical cla.s.ses. Ark was a monster who everyone thinks of when they hear any mention of the Larkinson Family."

Tusa twitched his lips. Just like any other Larkinson, he was quite familiar with Colonel Ark Larkinson's ill.u.s.trious track record. The two were nothing alike!

"I can't measure up to that monster." The younger Larkinson said.

"You don't have to." The uncle rea.s.sured Tusa. "A talent like Ark only comes once every couple of generations. Most of us can't replicate his success. Instead of treating him as a role model, you should follow the example of other Larkinson potentates. Do you know that Ark has a younger brother who entered the mech academy a few years later?"

"Uhm"

There were way too many members of the Larkinson Family for Tusa to remember the name of every relative. He only memorized the most important ones. Since he couldn't recall the name of Ark's younger brother, he probably wasn't a big deal.

The uncle smiled at Tusa. "Ryncol performed worse in every conceivable way. His genetic is C+, which is quite decent, but nothing special in comparison to that of his older brother. He is not as smart or diligent, so he scored much less in all of his theoretical cla.s.ses. His discipline also wasn't the best, so he did not make the best use of his practice time. These issues became compounded by the constant looks of disappointment from his fellow cadets. Ryncol never had a chance of getting out of the shadow of his much more impressive brother. Do you think your suffering is any worse than that of Ark's younger brother?"

"No." Tusa admitted. "I don't have an older brother or sister who has set a lot of expectations on my family line. I am the first potentate among the Billingsley-Larkinsons in several generations. I cannot imagine how Ryncol managed to survive the mech academy when he is always seen as Ark's inferior sibling. Did he manage to become a successful mech pilot?"

"He did. Ryncol managed to make it through the academy and enlist in the Mech Corps. He fought and survived the last Bright-Vesia War, which is a better result than most. While he hasn't managed to become an impressive expert pilot and mech commander like his older brother, Ryncol did not let down the Larkinson name in the slightest."

Tusa perked up when he heard his uncle's story.

If Ryncol was able to endure all of the disappointment and go on to become a veteran of the previous Bright-Vesia War, then how could Tusa do any worse?

"Can you tell me how Ryncol managed to do it, uncle?"

"It is not that difficult when you think about it. His first correct decision is to listen to the advice of his elders in the Larkinson Family. Benjamin had plenty of time to set Ryncol straight. His second correct decision is to stop getting captured by public opinion. So what if you are not a s.h.i.+ning star like Ark? You are you. Instead of letting people's judgment of you drag you down, it is better to ignore it all and focus on your own development. Make your own goals. Set your own pace. Follow it through. This is all you need to do in order to graduate from a mech academy. Don't think about comparing yourself to better mech cadets, even if they are blood relatives."

This was exactly what Tusa needed to hear. He no longer felt as depressed as before. Ryncol's situation used to be a lot worse, but he managed to find his own way as a Larkinson mech pilot.

Tusa did not want to do any worse when his circ.u.mstances were not as bad as that of Uncle Ryncol!

That would be a personal failure that he would never be able to accept!

He was stronger than that! He was a Larkinson! He needed to go all-out in order to make his parents and grandparents proud!

Now that Tusa found a guiding light, he s.h.i.+fted his attention to his most pressing problem. He explained his difficulty in choosing a suitable specialization for himself.

"I am not like those Larkinsons who pick up a rifle or a sword the first time and instantly feel a connection with a weapon." The mech cadet spoke. "I don't have any favorite weapons, and it is difficult for me to choose which ones I like the most. I am so new and unfamiliar with wielding them that I can't make a decision on which ones I should specialize in. I suppose I can wait until I become more familiar with the weapons, but I don't want to end up as a mediocre mech pilot. I want to achieve more in my career. What do you think I should do, uncle?"

"I can understand your difficulty. It is indeed difficult to excel in battle if you spend much of your early academy days on trying out so many different weapons. The only way you can solve this dilemma is to make a choice and hope that you are right."

"Is that it?" Tusa hesitantly asked.

"Part of being a qualified soldier is to know when you need to make a move, even when you are operating with very little verified information. Since you don't have any obvious connection with any weapons, you should settle your choice by using another criteria. What sort of mech pilot do you want to become? What mech type speaks the most to you? Do you have any obvious favorites?"

"Now that I think about it, I don't have a clear favorite. I don't like to pilot a heavy mech, but there are so many good points about light mechs and medium mechs that I can't make up my mind. As long as they are not too difficult to pilot, I am fine with piloting any mech type that falls within those weight cla.s.ses."

The older Larkinson looked at Tusa with greater comprehension.

"You are obviously worried about the ease of piloting a mech. Why not specialize in piloting knight mechs if that is the case? They have the lowest skill floors. It is difficult to do bad when piloting them as it doesn't take much effort to shelter behind a thick and imposing tower s.h.i.+eld."

Tusa thought for a moment. "That makes a lot of sense, but I don't like to specialize in a knight mech just because it is easier to pilot. It feels like a copout to be honest. I do not want to define my career by making a cowardly decision."

"Knight mech pilots are not cowards, Tusa. They are brave and heroic in their own way. They have to face a large amount of enemy attacks head-on. They cannot flinch or move away because there are many comrades who rely on their protection."

While Tusa had nothing against knight mechs and those who specialize in them, he really did not want to shackle himself to a clumsy machine that was characterized by low mobility.

"I want to pilot something that gives me more choice and initiative." Tusa spoke.

"Then what about light skirmishers?"

"What? That is the other extreme! They are much more dangerous to pilot since they are so lightly armored. Besides, they move so quickly that I can't catch up to their speed. I am too slow. My genetic apt.i.tude is not good enough to pilot these fast machines."

The uncle firmly shook his head. "I disagree. You do not understand light mechs as well as I do. There are many C-grade mech pilots who have done well while piloting light skirmishers. They don't have as many parts as larger machines, so the data throughput is not too great. Your genetic apt.i.tude will not limit your ability to pilot a light skirmisher."

"Then what about reaction speed? According to the latest tests, my reaction speed is not poor, but it is not great either."

"Reaction speed can help, but if you look into it deeply enough, you will find that many successful light mech pilots throughout the Milky Way do not score particularly well in this area. There are many other strengths that can make a greater difference. Do you know why I think it is not a bad idea for you to specialize in piloting light skirmishers?"

"No. I don't think I fit the profile for this mech type." Tusa looked utterly confused.

"Forget about profile. What you should be thinking about is your goal and how much you are willing to endure in order to fulfill it. You don't want to become an average mech pilot. You want to become a champion, an expert pilot. To do that, you need to excel in combat, and that is difficult to accomplish with most mech types. You see, each of them require a lot of talent or a strong willingness to train with them day after day. I do not think this is suitable for you because I do not think you are interested in becoming a weapons master."

Compared to other Larkinsons, Tusa indeed found it difficult to muster up the same degree of pa.s.sion when wielding a sword or a rifle.

"Then why tell me that I should think about specializing in light skirmishers?"

"Because it is the best way to transform your life."