Qiong Dafang relied on eating, drinking at Zhen Xiaoqi's house and getting pocket money from him. He finally survived the week.

Today was the day he got his salary. He had long promised Zhen Xiaoqi that he would pick Xiaoqi up from work in the evening, then go to the supermarket to buy some fruits and seafood, and have a good meal.

On the phone, Qiong Dafang's voice was filled with joy. "I can get 10,000 yuan this month with basic salary and bonus. Don't you like to eat mangoes? At night, I will buy you a few thin-skinned big mangoes imported from Thailand."

Zhen Xiaoqi put down his account book, took off the gold-rimmed gla.s.ses, a pair of eyes were exposed, and there was a smile hidden in the eyes, "No, that's expensive ah, just buy a few apples."

"Just buy big mangoes, I'll buy it for you." Qiong Dafang lowered his voice. "Don't I still owe you that debt? During the lunch break, I go to the ATM to take out the money, and I will pay it back to you at night. You don't need to feel heartache now, right?"

"Alipay transfer is fine. Why do you go withdraw cash? Isn't it troublesome?" Zhen Xiaoqi unconsciously pushed his gla.s.ses here and there, his voice was very gentle. A coworker in the same office looked up and looked at him in surprise.

Zhen Xiaoqi didn't notice it, slightly tilted his head, and focused his ear on the phone.

On the other end, Qiong Dafang's voice picked up slightly, with a hint of teasing him, "Don't you like red notes the most? Every time you get Grandpa Mao, you smile very sweetly!"

"Nonsense!" Zhen Xiaoqi blushed suddenly, whispered, and hung up the phone in a panic.

After Zhen Xiaoqi got off work, he waited for a long time for Qiong Dafang's call, saying that he had arrived at Zhen Xiaoqi company's entrance. Zhen Xiaoqi picked up his bag, rushed down, and ran all the way to Qiong Dafang before stopping.

He was like a kid, with both palms facing upwards and arms extended, looking at Qiong Dafang with antic.i.p.ation, "Will you give me a red note?"

Qiong Dafang's expression was a little strange. He said to Zhen Xiaoqi in a low voice, "You get on first."

Zhen Xiaoqi's smile stagnated, turned around behind Qiong Dafang, sat on the back seat of his electric scooter and hugged Qiong Dafang with both hands.

Qiong Dafang drove slowly, and Zhen Xiaoqi asked him behind him, "Are we going to the supermarket or the wet market now?"

Qiong Dafang did not reply. Just when Zhen Xiaoqi a.s.sumed Dafang did not hear him and wanted to ask again, Qiong Dafang held the hand that was placed on his waist and said, "Let's go back first."

Zhen Xiaoqi felt that Qiong Dafang was acting weird. His voice was sterner, and different from usual. He did not say anything further and stared at the back of Qiong Dafang's head in doubt.

Qiong Dafang brought Zhen Xiaoqi back to his house. When the two of them sat down on the sofa in his living room, he opened his mouth to Zhen Xiaoqi with great difficulty, "Xiaoqi, don't be angry. That.. I can't give you your red note for the time being."

He was in turmoil the entire way, unsure how to tell Zhen Xiaoqi about this. Now that he said it out, he felt like a piece of his heart was dangling in the air. "I lent the money to a colleague and I can't pay you back for the time being."

Zhen Xiaoqi was speechless two seconds, a feeling of disappointment rose in his heart. He was immersed in the happiness of getting that small amount of money all day. He even planned it out. He could take out a portion to buy delicious food and make a scrumptious dinner for Qiong Dafang. Now that Qiong Dafang suddenly told him this, his plan was foiled and the happiness he was looking forward to the entire day was gone.

Zhen Xiaoqi was not very happy and said, "What is wrong with you ah, why do you not keep to your words?"

Qiong Dafang defended himself. "My colleague needed the money in a hurry. Since I am not in need of money urgently, I lent it to him first."

Zhen Xiaoqi murmured, "Right, you don't need it urgently, you can't even afford to eat."

He asked Qiong Dafang, "Why did your colleague need it urgently? Did he say when he will pay you back?"

Qiong Dafang's tongue stuttered a little. "This.. this… I did not ask. We are all colleagues, I did not see a reason to.."

At first Zhen Xiaoqi was only a little disappointed, but now he really started to get angry. "Just because he is a colleague, there isn't a need to ask? Usually when you helped this or that colleague to buy things, did they return you the money?"

"It was me who did not want the money back."

"Yes, you are generous, you want to keep your face. Let's not mention those that you paid voluntarily. How about those that borrowed money from you before, have they paid it back?"

Zhen Xiaoqi was getting more and more angry as he talked. Qiong Dafang always did this, as long as he has the money, whether it was a colleague or a friend, he would just give it so casually.

Dafang's income was not considered small, but he every time he could only eat instant noodles before the month ended. Fortunately, he was strong and healthy. If he was not healthy, he may not have enough money to even buy medicine for a cold or fever!

Zhen Xiaoqi became angrier as he criticised Qiong Dafang, "Can you have some sense of responsibility? After working so long, how much money have you saved? Is there even 20 dollars?"

Qiong Dafang had a guilty conscience, and when Zhen Xiaoqi scolded him, he did not dare to argue back. However, Zhen Xiaoqi kept saying more and more. Not only did he criticize the things Dafang has been giving away in recent years, including a laptop, Zhen Xiaoqi also began to bring up things that happened in their university days again.

"You do so much for everyone, have they ever thanked you? Last time, the baby in Qian Xixi's stomach was not yours yet you gave her money for an abortion. Qian Xixi did not even say a single good thing about you…."

Qiong Dafang was scolded to the point of frustration. The moment he opened his mouth, he did not hold back. "She was my ex-girlfriend. I willingly gave her the money. What right do you have to care?"

His words shut Zhen Xiaoqi up immediately from his scolding. The room became so silent that if a needle dropped, the sound would be heard.

Zhen Xiaoqi stared at Qiong Dafang as if he couldn't believe what Dafang had just said. But he saw that Qiong Dafang looked regretful at his own words and did not know how to remedy the situation. He realized he did not hear wrongly at all. Qiong Dafang did say those words.

Finally understanding, Zhen Xiaoqi's mouth was drawn down, his eyes cast downwards, a sad expression forming on his face.

Zhen Xiaoqi stood up and said with a dry mouth. "I am going back first." Then, he grabbed his bag and rushed out, ran away quickly.

Zhen Xiaoqi carried his big backpack sadly. Like a snail, he moved slowly on the road.

There was no angry mood in his heart, he just felt empty.

He admitted that what Qiong Dafang actually said was a fact. What rights did Zhen Xiaoqi had to evaluate and criticize Qiong Dafang's lifestyle?

Zhen Xiaoqi, you can't control it and you were stepping out of line. He calmly told himself that friends shouldn't be like this, no matter how long their friends.h.i.+p was.

He always interfered in Qiong Dafang's life unconsciously. As long as Qiong Dafang did not reject him outrightly, Zhen Xiaoqi pretended that he did not know his real thoughts.

But what was fake was fake after all. When he was said by the other person that he had no right at all, he was more humiliated than ever. It felt as though those careless thoughts of his were all exposed out under the sun.

He dragged himself across the street, entered the building habitually and slowly climbed up to the 6th floor. When he arrived at the floor his house was on, he felt exhausted. He sat down in front of the door and did not even have the energy to open the door.

Usually he did not feel that the 6th floor was that high. Old buildings are just not that good. Zhen Xiaoqi thought blankly in his heart, one minute thinking that way, one minute thinking another.

He thought of Qiong Dafang again. Zhen Xiaoqi knew that he was annoying. He would ramble on, criticize non-stop and no one could stand someone like him.

But was his rambling really nonsense? In Zhen Xiaoqi's mind, the name Qian Xixi appeared again. Why did he bring up Qian Xixi this name again? It had happened so long ago. They had already graduated 4 years ago but he had not forgotten about it at all.

He remembered Qian Xixi, a female cla.s.smate of theirs who was Qiong Dafang's ex-girlfriend.

Zhen Xiaoqi still remembered that he himself used to be generous from time to time. Once, he bought movie tickets and wanted to invite Qiong Dafang to watch a movie. It was a literature romance movie.

When he held the movie tickets in his palm and had mustered up the greatest determination and courage in his lifetime, and asked Qiong Dafang if he would go with him…

He had not spoken yet, and Qiong Dafang had asked him enthusiastically if Zhen Xiaoqi could help him with his confession to Qian Xixi.

Qiong Dafang was like many other male university students who did things without thinking through. He bought colorful candles, and without any creativity, formed a heart shape array with the candles outside the girls' dormitory.

That night, Zhen Xiaoqi bent down, helped him to light the candles one by one. He was lighting the candles that Qiong Dafang were using to confess to someone else.

Time pa.s.sed by little by little, and the sky slowly darkened. At the girls' dormitory, a crowd gathered to watch.

It was a clear night. The breeze blew from the playground. It was gentle, cool, and comfortable. There was no danger of the candles being blown out.

Zhen Xiaoqi counted one, two, three, candles. One second, two seconds, three seconds…

The opening time of the movie pa.s.sed by every minute and every second, and the audience that should have been there would never be there.

That was the biggest waste in Zhen Xiaoqi's life.

Qiong Dafang embraced the first relations.h.i.+p in his life surrounded by the sway of the candlelight. The student audience gave out applause and laughter, and everything was so beautiful.

Zhen Xiaoqi stood far away from the scene, in the shadow not reachable by the candlelight, as if all the excitement had nothing to do with him.

Two movie tickets were fifty dollars. He who had always been stingy was stricken with heartache, felt like he was about to die.

He would never pay so much for a movie in his life again.

Zhen Xiaoqi buried his head in his knees, and silently wept in the stairwell in front of the house.

That wishful thinking that had carried on from the days of adolescence, that wishful thinking that has been covered by mud and ashes, that wishful that he has tried many ways but could not be suppressed, was mocking him for not being able to let it go.

I have done my best, really done my best.

But what was the point of doing his best? Even if the writing on notebook was covered with ink, it still left a black mark.

The traces on the heart was covered by tall walls built day by day. But once those walls fell and the bricks crumbled, the foundation below would still reveal its original appearance.

There were only three characters engraved on it.

Qiong Dafang.