"Tomorrow would've been more sensible," Hope commented.
"None of this is about sense."
"No, it's not. And I'm glad we're going tonight. He may not be there, or the headstones may have been damaged. It may never have been marked."
"Good. Keep up that positive thinking."
"Just preparing for possibilities."
"There's a possibility you'll find what you're after."
"I guess I'm a little nervous that we won't find anything, and a little nervous that we will."
He took one hand off the wheel, reached over to take one of hers in a gesture that surprised her heart into thudding. "Stop, and relax."
Because the abrupt order struck more in line with what she was used to, she did just that.
"This was all farmland," he told her as he turned onto a winding road with homes s.p.a.ced wide enough for some decent elbow room, for sloping lawns, shady trees.
"It must've been beautiful. All fields and rolling hills."
"People have to live somewhere. And they didn't crowd them in, so that's something. We got some work out here during the boom. People adding on, remodeling."
She leaned forward. "Is that-"
"Yeah, the old Ryder farmhouse. The developer was smart enough not to tear it down, to put some money into it-and I bet he got plenty out of it."
"It's beautiful, the stonework, the gingerbread. And it's big. Pretty gardens and trees. They must've added on that solarium, but it's well done. It's a nice spot." She looked at him as they drove past, turned again. "Have you ever been inside?"
"We did some work in it about three years ago. Updated the kitchen, two baths, added on a bonus room over the garage. And that sunroom you liked."
"How did it feel?"
"At the time? Like a job. A good one. Now?" He shrugged. "I guess I get what Mom was talking about. Maybe we should've paid more attention to this part of us, had more respect for it. My grandfather pretty much hated the farm, and it was clear he didn't get along with his old man, so I never thought much of it."
He turned yet again, onto a narrow gravel lane.
"Is this private property?"
"Maybe. Might be Park Service. We'll deal with it if we have to."
"They fought here? North and South, boys and men."
"All over h.e.l.l and back," Ryder confirmed. "See there?"
She saw the little pond he'd spoken of, its water dark and deep in the lowering light. Cattails crowded around it with their brown velvet heads, and ferns green with summer formed a verdant carpet.
Beyond it, before the trees thickened, stood a low stone wall. The sort, she thought, Billy Ryder might have built. Headstones tilted in its center. Hope counted sixteen-small markers, pocked by time and weather, some tipped in the rough ground.
"It looks lonely. Sad and lonely."
"I don't think dead's a party."
He parked, got out with the dog scrambling behind him. When Hope simply sat, he walked around, opened her door as the rest of the family convoy pulled up.
"He's here or he's not. Either way, we are."
She nodded, stepped out beside him.
It felt less lonely with people, with voices. With boys running and dogs sniffing. Still, she felt unsteady enough to reach for Ryder's hand, to be grateful when he linked his fingers with hers.
More than sixteen, she realized as they approached. Some of the markers were hardly more than a stone set flush with the ground.
Not all had names, or if they had once, time had erased them. But she read those she could. Mary Margaret Ryder. Daniel Edward Ryder. And there a tiny one, marking the grave of Susan-just Susan, who'd died in 1853 at the tender age of two months.
Someone tended to the gra.s.s here, she mused, so it didn't grow wild. Still, there was that sense of wild. To offset the infant, she found the grave of Catherine Foster Ryder, who'd lived from 1781 to 1874.
"Ninety-three," Justine murmured beside her. "A good, long life. I wish I knew who she was to me."
"You'll get the Bible, then you'll know."
"How come they can't stay at the inn like Lizzy?" Murphy asked her. "How come they have to stay here?"
"Lizzy's special, I guess." Justine lifted him up, pressed her face to his throat as Hope turned.
She'd thought Ryder stood beside her, but saw now he'd walked off, to the right, stood alone by a trio of graves.
She walked toward him, realized her heart began to thud as she did.
"He's the middle one."
"What?" Her hand trembled as she reached out for his again.
"He was born last, died second. They were brothers."
"How can you-I can't make out the names."
"Light's going," he said as she dropped down to her knees to peer closer.
"Oh G.o.d. Billy Ryder. They didn't put his formal name on his grave. Just Billy. March 14, 1843, to September 17, 1862."
"And Joshua, earlier that same year. Charlie, twenty-two years after. Three brothers."
"It's Billy." It was all she could think at first. Here. They'd found him. "Is she here?" Hope's head came up. "How could she be here?"
"It's not her." Understanding, Ryder gestured. "Honeysuckle. It's about buried the wall behind these graves."
He turned, looked at his mother. As their eyes met, he didn't have to call out to her, to speak. Hers filled as she started toward him.