"Somethinglikeit,yes."

"Icouldbuildapictureofoneoftheotherkidnappers,Ithink.Nottheones inthesiege.Ifyoulike."

"IfIlike!Wheredidyouseehim?Howdoyouknow?"

"I'veseenhimtwice.I'lltellyouabout.i.twhenIcomeinwiththelists."

"Howsoon?"hedemanded.

"Whenthemessengercomes.Anytimenow."

ThemessengerobliginglyarrivedwhilePucinelliwasclimbingintohiscar,soI borrowedtheFiatrunaboutagainandfollowedhimtohisheadquarters.

Fittingtogetherpiecesofheadwitheyesandmouth,chinandhairline,I relatedthetwosightings."Youprobablysawhimyourself,outsidethe ambulance,thenightthesiegestarted,"Isaid.

"Ihadtoomuchtothinkof."

Inoddedandaddedears."Thismanisyoung.Difficulttotell...notlessthan twenty-five,though.Lowerthirties,probably."

Ibuiltafullfaceandaprofile,butwasn'tsatisfied,andPucinellisaidhe wouldgetanartistintodrawwhatIwanted."Heworksinthecourts.Very fast."

Atelephonecallproducedtheartistwithinhalfanhour.Hecame,fat, grumbling,smellingofgarlicandscratching,andsayingthat.i.twa.s.siesta,how couldanysanemanbeexpectedtoworkattwointheafternoon?Hestaredwith disillusionatmycompositeefforts,fishedoutathincharcoalstick,andbegan performingrapidmiraclesonasketchpad.Everyfewsecondshestoppedtoraise hiseyebrowsatme,invitingcomment.

"Rounderhead,"Isaid,describingitwithmyhands."Asmoothroundhead."

Theroundheadappeared."Whatnext?"

"Themouth...afractiontoothin.Aslightlyfullerlowerlip."

HestoppedwhenIcouldthinkofnomoreimprovementsandshowedtheresultsto Pucinelli."ThisisthemanasyourEnglishfriendremembershim,"hesaid, sniffing."Memoriesareusuallywrong,don'tforget."

"Thanks,"Pucinellisaid."Gobacktosleep."

Theartistgrumbledanddeparted,andIsaid,"What'sthelatestonLorenzo Traventi?"

"Todaytheysayhe'lllive."

"Good,"Isaidwithrelief.Itwasthefirsttimeanyonehadbeenpositive.

"We'vechargedthetwokidnapperswithintenttokill.Theyareprotesting."He shrugged."Sofartheyarerefusingtosayanythingaboutthekidnap,though naturallywearepointingoutthatiftheyleadustootherarreststheir sentenceswillbeshorter."Hepickeduptheartist'sdrawings."I'llshowthem these.Itwillshockthem."Afleetinglookofsavagepleasurecrossedhisface: thelookofabornpolicemanpoisedforakill.I'dseenitonotherfacesabove otheruniforms,andneverdespisedit:andhedeservedhissatisfaction,after thestrainsofthepastweek.

"Theradio,"Pucinellisaid,pausingasheturnedaway.

"Yes?"

"Itcouldtransmitandreceiveonaircraftfrequencies."

Iblinked."That'snotusual,isit?"

"Notvery.Anditwastunedtotheinternationalemergencyfrequency...whichis monitoredallthetime,andwhichcertainlydidnotpickupanymessagesbetween kidnappers.Wecheckedattheairportthismorning."

Ishookmyheadinfrustration.Pucinelliwentoffwitheagernesstohis interrogations,andIreturnedtothevilla.

Alessiasaid,"DoyoumindifIaskyousomething?"

"Fireaway."

"IaskedPapabuthewon'tanswer,whichIsupposeanywayisananswerof sorts."Shepaused."DidIhaveanyclotheson,whenyoufoundme?"

"Agrayplasticraincoat,"Isaidmatter-of-factly.

"Oh."

Icouldn'ttellwhethertheanswerpleasedherornot.Sheremainedthoughtful forawhile,andthensaid,"IwokeuphereinadressIhaven'twornforyears.

AuntLuisaandIlariasaytheydon'tknowhowithappened.DidPapadressme?Is thatwhyhe'ssoembarra.s.sed?"

"Didn'tyouexpecttohaveclotheson?"Iaskedcuriously.

"Well..."Shehesitated.

Iliftedmyhead."Wereyounaked...allthetime?"

Shemovedherthinbodyrestlesslyinthearmchairasifshewouldsinkintoit, outofsight."Idon'twant..."shesaid;andbrokeoff,swallowing,whileinmy mindIfinishedthesentence.Don'twanteveryonetoknow.

"It'sallright,"Isaid."Iwon'tsay."

Weweresittinginthelibrary,theeveningfadingtodark,theheatoftheday diminishing;freshlyshowered,casuallydressed,waitingintheCencihousehold routinetobejoinedbyeveryoneforadrinkortwobeforedinner.Alessia's hairwasagaindamp,butshehadprogressedasfaraslipstick.

Shegavemeshortglancesofinspection,notsureofme.

"Whyareyouhere?"shesaid."Papasayshecouldn'thavegotthroughthese weekswithoutyou,but...Idon'treallyunderstand."

Iexplainedmyjob.

"Anadvisor?"

"That'sright."

Shethoughtforawhile,hergazewanderingovermyfaceanddowntomyhands andupagaintomyeyes.Heropinionswereunreadable,butfinallyshesighed, asifmakinguphermind.

"Well...adviseme,too,"shesaid."Ifeelveryodd.Likejetlag,onlymuch worse.Timelag.IfeelasifI'mwalkingontissuepaper.Asifnothing'sreal.

Ikeepwantingtocry.Ishouldbedeliriouslyhappy...whyaren'tI?"

"Reaction,"Isaid.

"Youdon'tknow...youcan'timagine...what.i.twaslike."

"I'veheardfrommanypeoplewhat.i.t'slike.Frompeoplelikeyou,straightback fromkidnap.They'vetoldme.Thefirstbludgeoningshock,thenotbeingableto believeit'shappening.Thehumiliations,forcedonyoupreciselytomakeyou afraidanddefenseless.n.o.bathrooms.Sometimesnoclothes.Certainlyno respect.Nokindnessorgentlenessofanysort.Imprisonment,noonetotalkto, nothingtofillthemind,justuncertaintyandfear...andguilt...Guiltthatyou didn'tescapeinthebeginning,guiltatthedistressbroughtonyourfamily, guiltatwhataransomwillcost...andfearforyourlife...ifthemoneycan'tbe raised,orifsomethinggoeswrong...ifthekidnapperspanic."

Shelistenedintently,atfirstwithsurpriseandthenwithrelief."Youdo know.Youdounderstand.Ihaven'tbeenabletosay...Idon'twanttoupsetthem...

andalso...also..."

"Alsoyoufeelashamed,"Isaid.

"Oh."Hereyeswidened."I...WhydoI?"

"Idon'tknow,butnearlyeveryonedoes."

"Dothey?"

"Yes."

Shesatquietforawhile,thenshesaid,"Howlongwillittake...formetoget overit?"

Tothattherewasnoanswer."Somepeopleshakeitoffalmostatonce,"Isaid.

"But.i.t'slikeillness,oradeath...youhavetogrowscartissue."

Somemanageditindays,someinweeks,someinyears;somebledforever.Some oftheapparentlystrongdisintegratedmost.Onecouldn'ttell,notontheday afterliberation.

Ilariacameintotheroominastunningscarletandgoldtogaandbegan switchingonthelamps.

"Itwasontheradionewsthatyou'refree,"shesaidtoAlessia."Iheardit upstairs.Makethemostofthepeace,thepaparazziwillbestormingupthe drivebeforeyoucanblink."

Alessiashrankagainintoherchairandlookeddistressed.Ilaria,itoccurred tomeuncharitably,haddressedforsuchanevent:anotherstatementaboutnot wantingtobeeclipsed.

"Doesyouradvicestretchtopaparazzi?"Alessiaaskedweakly,andInodded,"If youlike."

Ilariapattedthetopofmyheada.s.shepa.s.sedbehindmychair."OurMr.Fixit.

Neverataloss."

PaoloCencihimselfarrivedwithLuisa,theonelookinganxious,theother fluttery,asusual.

"Someonetelephonedfromthetelevisioncompany,"Cencisaid."Theysayacrew isonthewayhere.Alessia...you'dbetterstayinyourroomuntilthey'vegone."

Ishookmyhead."They'lljustcamponyourdoorstep.Better,really,toget.i.t over."IlookedatAlessia."Ifyoucouldpossibly...andIknowit'shard...make somesortofjoke,they'llgoawayquicker."

Shesaidinbewilderment,"Why?"

"Becausegoodnewsisbriefnews.Iftheythinkyouhadareallybadtime, they'llkeeponprobing.Tellthemthekidnapperstreatedyouwell,sayyou're gladtobehome,sayyou'llbebackontheracecourseverysoon.Iftheyaskyou anythingwhichitwouldreallydistressyoutoanswer,blankthethoughtsout andmakeajoke."

"Idon'tknow...ifIcan."

"Theworldwantstohearthatyou'reallright,"Isaid."Theywanttobe rea.s.sured,toseeyousmile.Ifyoucanmanageitnowitwillmakeyourreturn tonormallifemucheasier.Thepeopleyouknowwillgreetyouwithdelight...

theywon'tfindmeetingyouuncomfortable,whichtheycouldifthey'dseenyou inhysterics."

Cencisaidcrossly,"She'snotinhysterics."

"Iknowwhathemeans,"Alessiasaid.Shesmiledwanlyatherfather."Ihear you'repayingfortheadvice,sowe'dbettertakeit."

Oncemobilized,thefamilyputonaremarkableshow,likeactorsonstage.For IlariaandLuisaitwasleastdifficult,butforCencitheaffablehostrole musthaveseemedbizarre,asheadmittedthetelevisionpeoplewithcourtesyand washelpfulaboutelectricplugsandmovingfurniture.Asecondtelevisioncrew arrivedwhilethefirstwa.s.stillsettingup,andafterthatseveralcarsfulof reporters,somefrominternationalnewsagencies,andaclatterof photographers.Ilariamovedlikeascarletbirdamongthem,gailychatting,and evenLuisawasappearinggracious,inherunfocusedway.

Iwatchedthecircusa.s.semblefrombehindthealmostclosedlibrarydoor,while Alessiasatsilentinherarmchair,developingshadowsunderhereyes.

"Ican'tdoit,"shesaid.

"Theywon'texpectasonganddanceact.Justbe...normal."

"Andmakeajoke."

"Yes."

"Ifeelsick,"shesaid.

"You'reusedtocrowds,"Isaid."Usedtopeoplestaringatyou.Thinkof being..."Igroped"...inthewinners'circle.Lotsoffuss.You'reusedtoit, whichgivesyouashield."

Shemerelyswallowed,butwhenherfathercameforhershewalkedoutandfaced thebarrageofflashlightsandquestionswithoutcracking.Iwatchedfromthe librarydoor,listeningtoherslow,clearItalian.

"I'mdelightedtobehomewithmyfamily.Yes,I'mfine.Yes,Ihopetobe racingagainverysoon."

Thebrilliantlightingforthetelevisioncamerasmadeherlookextrapale, especiallyneartheglowingIlaria,b.u.t.thecalmhalfsmileonherfacenever wavered.

"No,Ineversawthekidnappers'faces.Theywerevery...discreet."

Thenewsgatherersreactedtothewordwithalowgrowlingrumbleof appreciation.

"Yes,thefoodwas.e.xcellent...ifyouliketinnedpasta."

Hertimingwasmarvellous:thistimeshereapedafulllaugh.

"I'vebeenlivinginthesortoftentpeopletakeonholiday.Size?Asingle bedroom...aboutthatsize.Yes...quitecomfortable...Ilistenedtomusic,mostof thetime."

Hervoicewasquiet,butrock-steady.Thewarmthofthenewsmentowardshercame overclearlynowintheirquestions,andshetoldthemanopensportscarhad provedaliabilityandsheregrettedhavingcausedeveryonesomuchtrouble.

"Howmuchransom?Idon'tknow.Myfathersaysitwasn'ttoomuch."

"Whatwastheworstthingaboutbeingkidnapped?"Sherepeatedthequestionas ifherselfwondering,andthen,afterapause,said,"MissingtheEnglishDerby, Iguess.MissingtherideonBrunelleschi."

Itwastheclimax.Tothenextquestionshesmiledandsaidshehadalotof thingstocatchupwith,andshewasabittired,andwouldtheypleaseexcuse her?

Theyapplaudedher.Ilistenedinamazementtothetributefromthemostcynical bunchintheworld,andshecameintothelibrarywithareallaughinhereyes.

Isawinaflashwhatherfamewasallabout:notjusttalent,notjustcourage, butstyle.