"And do you remember what an a.s.s you used to make of yourself over that precious silver watch of yours?"

It did one good to hear the laugh with which Charlie greeted this reminder.

"I'd give my repeater, and a ten-pound note besides, to get back that old watch," said he. (If he had but known!) "But there's no knowing where it is now; poor Tom Drift must have parted with it years ago."

With such talk the meal proceeded, and presently the conversation grew more general, and branched out on to all sorts of topics. George, having got over the first strangeness of finding himself in society, found it not so bad after all; and, indeed, he very soon amazed himself by the amount he talked. It was a new world to him, the hermit of the "Mouse-trap," to find himself exchanging ideas with men of his own intellectual standing; and he certainly forgave Jim his persistency in compelling his company this morning. He forgot the patches in his clothes among such gentlemen as Clarke and Charlie, and for the first time in his life felt himself superior to his natural diffidence and reserve. Who could help being at his ease where Charlie was? He kept up a running fire of chaff at his old schoolfellow, for which occasionally the others came in; and if it be true that laughter is a good digestive, Jim Halliday's breakfast that morning must have agreed with the five who partook of it.

"Who's this coming?" suddenly exclaimed the latter, as there came a sound of footsteps slowly ascending the stairs.

"Two of them!" said Charlie. "Perhaps it's your tailor and your hatter with their little bills."

"Whoever it is, they're blowing hard," said Clarke.

"They don't enjoy my `Gradus at Parna.s.sum,'" said Jim. "Come in, all of you!" he shouted.

The door opened slowly, and there appeared to the astonished eyes of Jim and his party a grave middle-aged gentleman and still more grave and middle-aged lady.

"Oh, my prophetic soul! my uncle and aunt!" groaned Jim.

CHAPTER TWENTY THREE.

HOW JIM'S UNCLE AND AUNT SPENT A DIFFERENT SORT OF DAY FROM THAT WHICH THEY HAD EXPECTED.

The apparition was indeed none other than Jim Halliday's dreaded uncle and aunt, and the object of their visit was easy to guess. They had, in fact, taken the long journey from Cornwall as fast as express trains could bring them, in order to remonstrate personally with their depraved nephew on the error of his ways.

They were evidently as astonished to find Jim's room full of visitors, as Jim on his part was to see them, and they looked so taken aback and disconcerted that the party at once rose, and offered to take their leave. Clarke and his friend actually did depart, but Jim still had presence of mind enough left to groan out an entreaty to Charlie and my master that they would remain--an appeal so pathetic that there was no resisting it.

Charlie politely handed the good people to chairs, while Jim, under cover of preparing a second edition of breakfast, hastily arranged his plan of defence.

"Reader," he whispered to my master, "whatever you do, keep the talk going, old man, or it's all U P." Then turning to his relatives, he broke out,--

"This _is_ a surprise! How are you both? Upon my word, you're looking grandly. How kind to come and see me up here! Will you allow me to introduce my two friends, Ensign Newcome and Mr Reader? My uncle and aunt, gentlemen."

The uncle and aunt bowed gravely, and in a frightened sort of way, in acknowledgment of the courteous greeting of the two young men. It was clear they had expected to find Jim alone, and over a quiet cup of cocoa to reduce him to a sense of his wickedness. It put them out of their reckoning, quite, to find that, if they were to open fire at once, it would have to be in the presence of these two gentlemanly and rather imposing strangers. However, they were too full of their mission to delay, and so the uncle began,--

"It will be as well, James, that I should state to you--"

"Not a word now, till you've had some breakfast," interrupted the wary Jim. "My poor dear aunt must be simply f.a.gged to death. Do take your bonnet off, and come and sit here in the easy-chair. Let me make you some cocoa; I know the way you take it, exactly. Try those chops in front of you, sir, they are prime, as Charlie will tell you. Reader, old man, draw in and keep us company. Well, I declare, this _is_ a jolly family party! And what's the news down in your part of the world?

Have you had a good harvest? My uncle comes from Cornwall, Charlie."

And he gave his friend a lugubrious wink, as much as to say, "Keep it up."

"Do you live near the sea?" thereupon began Charlie.

"Pretty near, that is, about twenty miles off," said the uncle, looking at Charlie under his spectacles.

"My love, the gentleman will laugh at you," said his good lady. "I call twenty miles a long way."

"I perfectly agree with you, ma'am," said Charlie, "Twenty miles is a good distance in this little island of ours. But it's curious how little they make of such a distance in a big country like India, for instance, where I am going. There, I am told, it is quite a common thing for a man to be twenty miles from his next-door neighbour, and yet be on constant visiting terms."

"Dear me!" said the uncle.

"You don't know India, I suppose, sir?" inquired Charlie.

"No; that is--"

"He's only read about it in books," again put in the aunt; "and so, my love, you'd better say at once you don't know anything about it."

"Well," said Charlie, "it depends a good deal on the books. Some books of travel are so vivid one almost seems to be in the country they describe.

"Er--what did you say, Reader?"

Reader was quick enough to take this broad hint, and keep up the talk.

"To my mind, the most interesting books are those which describe, not so much places, as people and their manners. There are a great many books of this kind about India. One I lately read was specially interesting."

And then, to Jim's unbounded delight and grat.i.tude, George began calmly to give a review a quarter of an hour long of the work in question for the benefit of the two old people, who, as they listened, became more and more impressed with the importance of their nephew's friend, and of the impossibility of obtruding their special grievance on the party at the present time. Indeed, the aunt had almost forgotten the speech with which she had come prepared, in her pleasure at hearing the young men talk, and she even joined in the conversation in a manner which showed how she enjoyed it. The uncle was still gloomy, and appeared to be waiting the first favourable opportunity for "coming to the point."

The opportunity, however, never occurred. After a long and lively talk on all sorts of matters, Jim adroitly turned the conversation on to the subject of athletics by appealing to his uncle to add his voice to that of Reader's other friends in rebuking him for never taking any exercise.

"Look at his pale face!" he exclaimed; "isn't it a disgrace?"

George bore this attack good-naturedly, and began to excuse himself; but the uncle, who had not before noticed his looks, interrupted him by saying,--

"Pardon me, sir, but I quite agree with James. If is very wrong to cultivate the brain at the expense of the body."

This observation brought down Charlie's hearty approval, who forthwith launched into a rhapsody on athletic sports--particularly football-- appealing in every sentence to the uncle, who now found himself fairly in the toils.

"If it were for nothing more than the moral training it gives a man,"

said Charlie--"for the pluck, manliness, and endurance it puts into him--we couldn't over-estimate the value of athletics; could we, sir?"

"No--er--that is to say--"

"Why, look at Jim, here! Upon my word, sir, if you'll excuse me saying it, it does you the greatest credit the way he has been brought up to value healthy exercise. Why, there are some parents and guardians who, instead of encouraging that sort of thing, would positively so far wrong their sons as to forbid it. I can't make out that sort of training, can you?"

"Eh? Well, possibly not," faltered the uncle, turning very red.

"Of course not, and you'll have your reward in seeing Jim turn out a far better clergyman than your mollycoddles, who don't know the way to look their fellow-men straight in the face. Jim, old man, you've had my cup up there ten minutes; hand it up."

Jim filled it to overflowing, as a token, perhaps, of the grat.i.tude of his heart towards his champion, and forthwith handed it up.

"And _a propos_ of that," pursued Charlie, having gulped down his coffee, "you are just come up here in the nick of time, for there's a glorious football-match on to-day--"

The uncle groaned and the aunt fidgeted.

"In which Jim is playing, and no one deserves the honour better. You must come and see it by all means. Eh, Jim?"