"Big surprise there," Mattie said from over beside Trent.

"Yeah, isn't it?" Ric returned with a shrug. "Anyway, the boss was just steppin' up to the counter with the biggest cup of coke I think I've ever seen. What was it? Sixty-four ounces?"

I nodded and he continued. "So he's standin' there, and this guy runs in the door and sticks what looked like a 44 magnum right into his face..."

"Oh my God!" Kharl interrupted and looked at me, "Did ya put yer finger in the gun?"

"Have you already heard the damn story?" Rictor looked disappointed.

Kharl laughed loudly, and shook his head. "I always wanted 'ta do that."

Prada looked at Kharl with a sad shake of her head and said, "Just knowin' that you raised the man explains so much."

Kyra snorted and said, "There was no way I could even stop it. I tried so hard to prevent the insanity from passing to the child, but I had to sleep sometimes, and I just couldn't stop it."

There was laughter all around the table.

"So there we were with this kid standin' there with his finger in the barrel of a 44." Rictor continued after a moment, "It was just so ridiculous, the cashier was shakin' with her mouth hangin' open, and I racked my brain to find a way to stop the madness..."

"Bullshit!" Prada exclaimed, "You're just as bad as he is! I didn't see any trying to stop anything!"

"What?" Rictor returned.

"I remember that the only thing you did was ask the guy with his finger in a 44 whether he wanted his twinkies with icing or the plain ones."

"That was a ruse..."

"For what?" she asked, "When he said the iced ones you just picked them up, and walked toward the cashier like no one was there."

"I was strategically placin' myself where I could intercede if it was necessary."

"Really? You were behind our fearless leader where you couldn't even see what was happening anymore."

"Well, you know how important it is to get the Boss his twinkies. If he didn't get 'em he might do something crazy. I was just doin' my job."

Lyrica laughed merrily. She was watching memories in both of their auras.

"That's just not fair," Kharl said. "She gets to watch stuff happen while we gotta wait for these slow asses to get on with it."

"Any way," Prada said, "so the Boss stands there with his finger in this guy's gun, and the guy starts cursing, and trying to pull back on the gun, but the finger follows as fast as he can move the gun. Then the guy actually looks at Colin's face where he gets a shot of the Crazy Eye. He just screams, and lets go of the gun, and sprints back out the door."

"Crazy Eye?" Mattie asked, "What's the Crazy Eye?"

"Ahh, it's that look when you can see the Soulfire burning inside of them, and you start to think he might just rip your spine out or something equally unsavory."

"Yeah I saw that one," Kharl said, "He was still carrying the spine when he got back into the shield."

"Yeah," Prada said, "Right, that's the look I'm talking about. The Crazy Eye."

To be totally honest, I don't know what possessed me to do it but it was so hilarious I couldn't stop myself. I'd pushed a shield out to stop the hammer if he pulled the trigger. There was no danger of him actually doing anyone harm. I had almost forgotten the whole incident, but I'm not allowed to forget anything for long before someone always brings it back up. Usually at one of these grand get-togethers that I tend to be a party to.

"That's awesome," Kharl said with a grin. "God I hope I get the chance to do that someday."

I pointed at his huge hand, "He better bring a twelve gauge shotgun so your finger will fit in the barrel."

"True enough," He laughed and reached for another hot wing from the platter in front of him.

Everyone had their round of laughter at the antics of a Soullord who has seen too many cartoons. When they settled down I looked at Lyrica.

"So I know we've all seen the extremely smelly dog that's taken up residence at the Academy. It seems that it came to the Academy after our esteemed colleagues returned. You know, the ones who were on vacation in Scotland, while we were all workin' so hard here at home. Anyone care to explain the presence of the ugliest, stinkingest creature I have ever laid eyes on?"

"I'm not sure if 'stinkingest' is really a word," Jacobs said, "Smelliest, might be right, or most smelly, odiferous even."

"Yeah," Rictor said. "I've never seen any animals that would get anywhere near a Soulguard, much less follow a group of 'em around."

"And what the Hell is that damn thing?" I agreed. "I mean, I can tell it's a dog but, damn. Its whole body is all wrinkled up. Its wrinkles have wrinkles."

"I think it's adorable," Prada argued.

"Once again," Kharl said in triumph, "Proof positive that all women are crazy. That's probably the ugliest animal I've ever seen."

Trent was snickering and looking at Lyrica, who was trying her best not to pay any attention to the rest of us.

"It happened the other day," he burst out. I think Trent would probably explode if he really had to keep a secret. The man is hopeless.

"We were down on the highway below the Academy giving Lyrica a chance to work on her driving skills. Skills that she doesn't possess at all," He began.

"Humph," Lyrica looked around the room.

"Anyway, we topped a rise, and this dog is a couple of hundred feet from us. It turns around and like most other animals, runs like hell when Soulguards approach. Unfortunately, the car in the other lane hit him, and he flew back out of the road."

"Here's part of the girl's lack of driving skills," Trent said, "She was out the door and running before the dog had even hit the ground. She didn't stop the car; she didn't even touch the brakes. She just stepped out and ran for the dog. Of course, now, we're in a car flying down the road with no driver, and Mattie is screaming in terror..."

"Now wait a damn minute! I recall the screams coming from the back seat, not the front," Mattie interrupted.

"Nope, definitely from the front," He answered quickly, "But regardless, by the time we stopped the car and got out, Lyrica is holding this ugly thing's head in her lap, and we're feeling her Pull through the dog's stream."

"Then it followed us home," Lyrica said, "And now I finally get to have a puppy. A sixty pound, smelly puppy, but a puppy, nonetheless."

"It's a Shar-Pei, by the way," Kevin Graves offered. "They're actually a very expensive breed."

"People really buy dogs that ugly?" Jacobs asked. "They pay money, real money for 'em?"

"Lots of folks do," The Kid answered.

"Well I'll be damned," Jacobs mumbled, "Who would've thunk it?"

The waitress returned with the check and before she could ask, twenty-one fingers pointed straight at me. I sighed, she laughed and handed me the bill.

"Jesus, you people are gonna put me in the poor house," I mumbled and handed her my debit card.

It would take quite a bit more than that to hurt the money I had squirreled away in the bank. Warren was still doing wonders with my finances. I really needed to take a trip back to Knoxville and see him, and see the Twins, too. I had only seen them once since the whole fiasco in Kansas. They'd really come through with finding more Guards to back us up there.

Maybe I could go in the next few weeks, maybe after the demonstration in Kansas.

Chapter 6.

I awoke the next morning early and decided to go for a run. As I left my quarters I saw a figure exit the room that had been given to Jacobs. With his leg and arm gone, he wasn't made to stay out in the regular barracks. The elevators were closer to one of the rooms in the underground facility.

I recognized the woman as she turned and waved at me with a smile. It was the waitress from Hooters. I smiled and waved back.

"Good morning," I said.

"It's a very good morning," She answered and her aura told me that she didn't lie.

Jacobs rolled out the door with his chair, "Hey Boss."

"Ivan," I nodded in greeting. Out of all the men who had been hitting on the beautiful woman at Hooters, she'd went home with Jacobs.

"Boss, can I talk to ya a couple a minutes?"

"Sure," I stopped beside him, "What can I do for you?"

He turned to the woman, "I gotta talk a bit here, Darlin'. I'll see ya later though?"

She bent down and kissed him quite thoroughly.

"Count on it, Hero," she said with a smile. She turned and headed for the elevators.

"You tellin' your war stories to that girl, Ivan?"

"To be honest, Boss, she knows as much about us as any regular person I know. She recognized me from the news reports on the battle. She says I'm a hero."

"Well, she's right, Ivan," I said, "But if you repeat what I just said, I'll deny it."

He chuckled, "Maybe I should start recordin' conversations so people can't deny the fact that your's truly here is a hero."

"Speaking of hero's," I said, "I have a small project I would like for you to work on for me."

One thing I know about Ivan Jacobs is that he feels useless now that his arm and leg were ripped off. He's always been a fighter, and now he can't do what he's been doing for forty years. It tends to make a person feel lost when their life has such a drastic change.

"As long as it's not typing, I'm up for it."

"If you type like I do, I doubt the Soulguard can afford the time it would take you to type anything out," I returned, "No, what I want is someone to really put some time in to figure out how to imbue a bullet."

"That's not something that'll be easy to do, Boss. Powder is tricky around Soulfire, but I got a couple of ideas I've kicked around over the years. I'll definitely see if I can get some results for ya."

He looked at me for a moment, and I could see the emotions rolling in his aura. He wanted to ask me something very serious, and was almost afraid to do it.

"Just ask," I said softly. "What is it?"

It came out in a flood, "Dammit, Boss, I'm friggin' useless. I can't fight anymore! It's all I know how 'ta do. It's the only skill I have that's worth anything!"

"I know it's hard, Ivan. You'll learn new skills." I placed my hand on his shoulder. "You just have to give it some time."

He was silent for a few seconds before he asked, "Will you make me a Mage?"

This was the question. Somehow I knew it was what he was going to ask, and I knew, also, that this was what he needed. But it was dangerous, very dangerous. Three Guards died when I did that Pull in Kansas, including Patrick Shoffner.

"It's a very dangerous process, Ivan, but I do understand why you want this," I said. "We lost Guards when I did that last time, including Pat. Think another week on it, and if you still wanna try it, then come see me. If your focus slips for an instant Ivan, it's the end. Think about it, and think about your focus skills. Make damn sure this is what ya want. The Source is one unforgiving bitch, and she will burn you down in seconds."

"I've thought for a good bit, Sir," He said. "But I'll wait another week to tell ya the same thing. I'm useless as a Guard, but as a Mage, I can still fight."

"There's no guarantee, Ivan, how strong you can be," I said. "You may be no stronger than a support Mage."

"Boss, a support Mage can still be used in the war, a one armed, one legged Guard can't."

I nodded and gripped his shoulder, "Just come see me in a week if ya still plan on this. I'll have to clear something like this with the Archmage. I could do it and ask for forgiveness instead of permission, but it really sets a bad precedent if I do that. If she supports it, I will try my best."

"Boss, that's all I can ask for. Thank you," he said. "I'll get right on the other thing as well. You know anyone with a gun that is willin' to risk it getting blown up?"

I handed him a credit card, "Buy whatcha need. This is high priority, Ivan. We need it for some surprises I have in mind for the next Kresh visitors."

"A very nasty surprise, I hope?" he asked.

I smiled, "Very nasty."

"That's not surprising," Paige said, "I wondered who would be the first to come forward and request this. I'm a bit surprised it was Ivan Jacobs, though."

"Why?"

"I mean, he's already been through the mill. He's received injuries that would have killed him under normal circumstances. Yet he wants to run right back toward the fight. I would have thought he would be ready to say he's done enough."

I chuckled, "If you spend as much time with the Guard as I do, you'll understand. There is one thing above all else I learned about them. Soulguards never quit. You take his leg, he'll hobble to the fight. Take his arms, he'll hold the blade in his teeth. They fight because it's who they are. There will be a new breed of Guard after this, though. Our Guards are warriors. The new Guards will be soldiers."

"What is the distinction between them?"

"Warriors fight because it is who they are," I said. "A warrior lives to fight and fights to live. He fights for the fight itself."

"And a soldier?"