"Yeah," I murmur.
He nuzzles my cheek then neck. "Will you stay the weekend?"
"Yes." I'm about to tell him I'll stay forever but fear his reaction. "Oh, god. I forgot to tell Todd where I was."
"I told him."
"Oh. That I slept on your floor?"
"Nah. He's a teen boy. He would've seen through that. I told him if he needed us, we're in my room."
I smile. Todd is growing up. Petr and me being together will make him happy.
"Ready for breakfast?" Petr asks. "I went to grab it and came back to find you in the shower."
"I'd love breakfast."
He kisses me intensely once more before easing out of my body and stepping back. I lower my legs. He steadies me, and we leave the shower.
Petr dries me off then hands me one of his t-shirts. I pull it on while he tugs on his sweatpants. My eyes move hungrily over his muscular torso. He catches the look with a wink.
"I can guess what we're having for dessert," he says and catches me around the waist. He hugs me to him, and I melt. "C'mon. Breakfast is waiting." Stooping over, he lifts me and carries me out of the bathroom and to the bed and sets me down. A breakfast tray is on the bench at the foot of his sleigh bed. He lifts it and brings it to the bed beside me. "We have strawberry crepes, sausage, bread basket and coffee."
"It smells amazing."
Petr climbs behind me and sits, straddling me. I lean back against his chest and sigh. He hugs me.
"Can I ask you about what you were running from?" he murmurs. "I know there's no good time to discuss it."
"But you're worried I'll flip again and change my mind," I guess.
"I don't think it's possible for either of us to walk away after last night."
"No," I agree softly.
"I want there to be nothing between us. I want to know what scared you, so I can help protect you from it. I want ... us, Claudia, and everything that entails."
My eyes water at the words. With mixed feelings, I debate what to say. I fear discussing the past only because of all the horrible memories and emotions it contains. "Okay," I whisper hoarsely. "And then you're making love to me again to cheer me up."
"As many times as it takes," he replies and squeezes me.
I lean forward to grab a piece of toast and nibble on it. "I met Jake when I was eighteen. He was everything a girl that age dreams of: smart, sexy, and charming. I was naive and gullible and totally enamored by him. I fell hard, and I didn't know how unhealthy our relationship was for about a year. He slowly curbed what I did, where I went, who I spoke to. Who I looked at. He would fly into jealous rages at the drop of a hat then apologize profusely later. I learned the best way to keep him happy was to do what he wanted.
"I stopped seeing my friends, stopped going to college and talking to my mom. I became really lonely, and whenever I confronted him, he grew increasingly upset until the day he hit me for asking if I could go to my brother's elementary school graduation. He told me if I didn't behave, he'd take it out on Todd next time. I thought love meant I needed to sacrifice, but I couldn't deal with the fact he hit me. At that point, two years in, I realized there was an issue but not how to get out. I couldn't talk to anyone, and he went through my computer every day so I couldn't google how to get help. I was afraid to leave the house ..." I stop, eyes blurring as I recall the horror of my life at that point.
Petr kisses my temple and whispers something I don't catch, because I'm too deep in the memories.
"Anyway, things got worse. One day, after he'd hurt me more than usual, I just left and went to the police. They took a report, told me I needed to get help and spoke to him. That's it. Told him I talked to them. That did not go over so well. I couldn't walk for a couple of days after that round. I'd always had a love-hate relationship with my mom, but she knew something was up. She slipped me a note during one of my supervised visits where Jake was with us. The next time we met, I gave her a note telling her what was going on.
"Jake, of course, eventually found out, and I wasn't allowed to see her anymore. He started picking up Todd from school and telling my mom if she did anything to help me, Todd wasn't coming home one day. Four years ago, I just ... snapped one day. He went to work. I took my car, my cash and what clothes I could carry, went to Todd's school, and drove away as fast as I could. Called my mother a month later. She was certain we were dead. She gave me the number for an old attorney friend of my father's, Simon." I pause, regretting the whole mess and wishing I'd had a better plan or way out. I'd done what I knew to do, which was simply to get away.
"Is your mother okay?" Petr asks. There's a note of controlled anger in his tone. He's holding me gently, but he's tense, too.
"Yeah. Jake ... liked her. Or maybe he knew I'd always call her someday, and that's how he could find me. He never hurt her, just threatened her against going to the police. He was involved with some really bad stuff, drug trafficking and such. I told Simon everything I had learned about his operations during the time I was with him. It wasn't a lot, but it was enough to tip off the federal authorities that were missing pieces of the puzzle about who was doing it. Long story short, they started investigating.
"I imagine that's another reason why Jake won't just leave me alone. He figured out pretty fast I sold him out. He found us twice the first year and once the second, once the third ... twice this year," I drift off. My breathing is off, and I find myself reaching for my face and the bruises that were there five months ago, before desperation led me out of Jake's comfort zone of the south and here to Massachusetts. "He just won't stop."
"These are defensive wounds," Petr says, taking one wrist and rolling it to display the scars along my forearm.
"Yeah. He used a knife last time. He was trying to get Todd. I don't even really know how we got away ... I was in such bad shape."
"You've been waiting all this time for the investigation to put him away."
"Yeah. I called Simon yesterday, because I ..." I drift off, a little embarrassed.
Petr kisses me on the cheek. "Why?"
"Because I'm tired of running. You make me want to take a chance and live, and I couldn't do that until Jake was off the street," I say in a trembling voice. "Because I really, really wanted to go to dinner with you."
He's quiet, holding me against his strong frame.
"Is that stupid? I wanted my nightmare to be over, so we could go to dinner?" I ask.
"No, Claudia."
With effort, I steady my breathing and stop shaking. Petr is patient and quiet, allowing me time to recover.
"I've never been drawn to someone like I am you, Petr," I say when I'm calm enough once more. "You've been so good to Todd, and you've been so patient with me."
He chuckles. "You're worth waiting for."
I twist in his lap to see his face. A shadow hangs over his features, and there's anger in his gaze. He manages to smile at me. I touch his scruffy cheek.
"I'm sorry if I upset you," I whisper, admiring his profile.
"Thank you for telling me." He touches his forehead to mine. "Thank you for trusting me."
"I want an us, too, Petr. This is the first step."
"I'm sorry for your pain, Claudia. I won't let anything happen to you again. Ever."
I smile at him. I'm raw once more, in turmoil after reliving the nightmare of Jake and so filled with warm, joyous emotion towards Petr, I can't process it. I don't like feeling vulnerable or out of control, but with Petr, I feel safe.
Our relationship is beginning and already feels permanent and too natural not to last.
He holds me for a while longer. I can tell what I've revealed troubles him. I don't know what to tell him to make it better when it disturbs me equally as much. The only victory I have is knowing The Monster will be in jail come Monday, and my life will Petr begins today.
"Can you ice skate?" Petr asks in a lighter tone.
"No."
"I'll teach you."
I start to smile, giddy at the idea of spending the weekend with him.
An hour later, we're out of bed and walking hand in hand through the mansion. He stops me to sneak kisses, and I hug him readily, unable to take my hands off him when we're so close. Some of the houseguests are up while the majority are either still in bed on the snowy Christmas morning or congregating in the common rooms.
We head out back only to find another foot of snow blocking the ice rink. Petr pauses beside a blazing bonfire on the veranda, and we gaze out over the snow-covered backyard.
"I'll never get used to the cold," I complain and shiver.
His arms encircle me instinctively, and I lean back against him, enjoying his warmth. "I feel like I know everything about you and nothing at all. Where are you from originally?" he asks.
"Florida and Texas. Grew up around Dallas and moved to Miami after my father died," I reply.
"You plan on returning there now that The Monster is gone?"
"I plan on being wherever you are. Are you stationed here or ... does it work that way?" I ask.
"Sort of. I pretty much have my choice of assignment," he says. "The military gave me a choice to leave at any point. They don't normally keep guys like me who can't qualify as mission ready. Baba pulled a few strings with old friends for me to remain, and I'm on restricted duty as a recruiter."
"You really love it."
"I do. My family has a history of public service, and this is what I want to do. I love being close to home after about eight years away from home. Baba is getting older, too, so I help out with the family foundations now that Katya moved away to be with Sawyer. I figure I'll stick around here until I retire."
I consider the snow. It's a small price to pay to be near Petr.
"You okay with all that?" It sounds like he's trying to joke, but there's a serious note in his voice.
"Completely. I want you to be happy, Petr, and from what I can tell, you are," I reply. "I ... I guess I have to figure out what to do with my life now. I hadn't thought about it in the past four years."
"You've got a terrific skill with graphics. Baba would hire you in a heartbeat to work for our foundations."
A flutter of anxiety, or maybe excitement, races through me. Petr's talking like me being here with him is permanent. I kinda love the idea.
"How about, instead of ice skating, we grab some coffee and fill in the blanks about each other's lives?" he suggests. "Favorite colors, movies, whatever."
"And cuddle," I add.
"Yeah. I don't plan on letting you go anytime soon."
And he doesn't. The next four days are sheer bliss. We talk, mingle with his family and Todd, make love every chance we have, and wake up giggling about the new positions we tried. If I'd ever imagined a perfect weekend, it would fail miserably to stack up to our perfect weekend. Petr rarely leaves my side, and when he's with me, we're constantly touching. The shadow and fear are gone by Sunday night, lifted from a combination of Simon's news and the miracle of Petr.
Monday morning, I get up early to go to work as usual. He appears with a tray of breakfast, his hair tousled and his chest bare. I reach for him automatically after he sets it down, the need to be in contact with his warm skin consuming and far too compelling to resist.
He hugs me. I breathe in his scent and rest my cheek against his chest.
"Todd's up. The driver took him to school," he reports and nuzzles my cheek. "You sure I can't convince you to stay?"
"You can. But you shouldn't," I say with a laugh. I kiss him, a long, lingering kiss. His hands go around me. "I know we have us. I need to figure out a few more things for myself, like ... how I'll transition to doing what I want, whether I should go back to school. That kind of stuff."
"Money isn't an issue."
"I know, Petr." I draw away. "But ... I need my own independence still. I can't rely on you for that."
"I understand," he replies. "Say the word, and Baba can create a spot for you on the payroll doing graphics work."
I hesitate. I know how serious he is, and it thrills me. I also need some space to determine my own fate.
"Think it over." He speaks before I can say the words. He squeezes my bottom and pulls me against his hips. "I'll wait. As long as you plan on coming home tonight?"
Home. I could get used to his home being mine. I'm not sure how appropriate it is yet. Our relationship is just beginning, no matter how incredible it feels. Yet the thought of spending the night anywhere where he's not has absolutely no appeal.
"Yes. If that's okay," I murmur. "I don't think we'll both fit in my twin bed."
"We could make it work." His eyes sparkle. He tucks hair behind one of my ears. "Want me to drive you in?"
I nod. I don't want to go anywhere at the moment, but I'm not leaving my job until I have a better life plan. No matter what, it'll include Petr. He pulls on a sweatshirt. I sigh, missing his chiseled upper body already.
With our arms around one another, we walk through the quiet mansion to the front, where his truck is parked and running already. We hold hands even in the vehicle. Imagining how long my day will feel until I see him again pains me, and I want to laugh at myself for being head over heels for him already.
"This was the best weekend of my life," I say when he stops in front of the diner. "Thank you, Petr."
He kisses the back of my hand. "It's the beginning, Claudia. I hope you know that."
"I do." And I love it. Leaning forward, I kiss him once more. He cups my cheeks with his hands and deepens the kiss. I almost melt then and there at his taste. I crave his flavor, his touch, his scent all over my body.
He leans away, breathing hard. "Can't get enough of you."
"I know." My hand slides down his hard abs to the bulge of his erection. "Tonight," I promise with a grin.
"Damn right." He smiles back. "Go. Before I drive us home and spend another day making love to you."
My god ... I want that so much. Heart soaring, stomach fluttering, and blood racing too fast for me to feel the cold, I hop out of the truck and float to the diner, turning to wave when I reach the door.
He waves back.
I walk in, a grinning happy fool.
Eileen eyes me from her place behind the counter. The normal crowd is present, about four regulars. I don't feel quite capable of my normal concentration anyway and am grateful the Christmas rush is over. My hands tremble when I pull off my coat and swap snow boots for flats in the staff section.
Todd's schedule is in my apron, along with the business card Petr gave me on our first meeting. I check Todd's calendar to see it empty for this evening. Automatically, I calculate what time he should be home after leaving school.
And then stop to debate. Simon said The Monster would be arrested today. I guess I should assume that means by the usual close of business hours, around five or six. Today is the last instance I'll have to time Todd getting home.
It doesn't seem real.
"Have a good Christmas?" Eileen asks when I emerge.