"It fits." Rankil scowled after one too many adjustments for her liking. "Thank you."

"I think you need mitts, too." Myrla stepped back. "Maybe some red ones." She thought of how they would match Rankil's blush. "Yes, definitely red."

"I don't need them, but thank you anyway." Rankil rolled the gift into a neat ball and returned to her seat, her shoulders slumped.

"We all need winter mitts." Myrla moved her mat closer, unsettling Rankil all the more. "And red is a good color for you. Snowberries will be ripe soon. You get the best color from them. I'll dye the yarn and knit you some in the next moon cycle or so."

Swayed by Kaelan's critical gaze, Rankil accepted Myrla's offer, her crimson blush fading as the conversation steered in other directions. Kaelan had let Rankil's ill moods go unchecked for too long, a situation she remedied the next day as they mapped.

"I know things are difficult for you right now." Kaelan held her voice to a gentle but firm tone. "But there's no reason for you to mistreat Myrla. She's only being kind."

"It's just that I'd rather be alone as of late." Rankil curled on a low boulder. Kaelan scribbled their position onto a heavy hide scroll, the torch's orange glow dancing high and back as she inked the small chamber's position.

"A need for solitude is one thing. Demanding it by way of hatred is quite another." Kaelan blew on the ink. "Manners are important throughout your life. My progenies will not be known for being lax in them."

"Yes, Kaelan." Rankil was quiet for a moment then tilted her head in a confused fashion. If anyone understood what was going on right now, she supposed it would be Kaelan. "Have you ever had so much going through your head you thought it might burst?"

"All the time. I've found it's preceeded by a period of no thought at all."

"That's what gets me." Rankil was relieved she wasn't alone. "It's all or nothing, empty or full. Why can't it be one thing at a time?"

"Anger, fear, joy, frustration and pain in one giant burst and then a blank. Hard to control, impossible to express so someone else might understand." Kaelan rolled the map and slid it into her sling. "Let's see what's down that right hand corridor." They proceeded in silence, Kaelan almost inaudible as she measured the paces to the next chamber.

"Kaelan?"

"Don't make me lose count." There remained silence until they reached their destination, and Kaelan had recorded the distance. "You were saying?"

"Never mind."

"You sure?"

"No, I'm not."

"Then tell me."

"Myrla."

"What about her?" Kaelan stopped estimating the chamber's size and turned to Rankil.

"I like her."

"I know that."

"She's always nice to me."

"That's because she likes you, too."

"But-" Rankil's face scrunched. "I think I'm scared of her."

"I know." Kaelan finished her estimation, dipped her stylus and noted her measurements.

"You do?"

"Perfectly normal at your age."

"It is?"

"Yes. So are the thoughts I'm sure you're having from time to time."

"You?"

Kaelan glanced up with a grin. "They cannot be outgrown."

"Don't think I want to." Rankil drew a lingering breath and tucked her chilled fingers into her underarms. Red mitts would be appreciated. "The thoughts are nice most of the time, almost sweet until I see"-she couldn't bear saying Tisph's name-"his face and then I get scared again but in a different way."

"Then angry?" suggested Kaelan.

"Furious!"

"Memories can hurt, daughter, and you have some bitter ones to work through." Kaelan picked up the torch and motioned Rankil to follow. "The nightmares will likely worsen before they get better, so will the anger. It's your mind's way of purging itself. It's all right to cry about it. It's all right to scream. But, it's never appropriate to take it out on others."

"Like I do Myrla?"

Kaelan's tools were now away, and her attention centered on Rankil. "To some extent you've done it to us all."

"I guess I'm jealous she had love and support when I didn't."

"You have it now."

"So I could cry, and you wouldn't be ashamed of me?"

"Not in the least." Kaelan could see the emotion welling in Rankil's eyes. "Here is probably the best place."

"Why?" Rankil gulped back the lump in her throat.

"Myrla isn't here to scare it back in you."

"Oh." First one, then a shrill line of angry wails escaped Rankil's shuddering insides. Kaelan was there when her security was needed, wary but close when the fury threatened. The two sides of Rankil fought bitterly, her still dominant child clamoring for position against the adult presence that cried outrage, swearing revenge for what she had endured. It was good to scream, to bellow, curse and spit. She told Kaelan of the abuse, the ridicule. How she had been made to feel less than alive, left dirty until she knew no other way to be. She shed tears for the burns from the fire irons when she wasn't quick enough, and sputtered how she'd avoided the barn at all costs, Tisph's name unable to cross her lips. She would make them all pay. Somehow, some way, she would be vindicated.

Kaelan listened, asked a few critical questions but primarily listened, letting Rankil ramble and sob until she was spent. As one torch burned low, another was lit until only one remained in their sling. By then, Rankil sat in silence, her billions of thoughts expressed, her head empty once again.

"Did it help?" Kaelan's question echoed in the nothing.

"Kind of."

"Want to come mapping with me again?"

"Please." Rankil became aware Kaelan's arms surrounding her. She had supported her since childhood tears had won the struggle. Those arms had been there only when necessary, and Rankil knew they'd be there again. They had to be again. Her entire being required it. "Can I come tomorrow?"

"You're welcome whenever you feel the need."

Neither talked as they made their way back to the cavern mouth, the nothing in Rankil's head turning into a nauseating headache which forced her to bed the minute they returned.

Kaelan instructed the others to leave Rankil alone, assuring them she would be improved by morning. Only Myrla dared draw near, her eyes a brilliant blue of compassion as she offered a doll.

"She helps."

"She does?" Rankil's eyes fixed on Myrla and the faded, cheery-faced comfort in her hands.

"Yeah, she's the one I always hold when I'm scared." Myrla tucked the doll into the crook of Rankil's arm. "Take her. I bet she'll work for you, too, if you'll let her."

"You think?" It no longer mattered if Myrla knew or not.

"I do care, Rankil."

"I care about you, too. Be my friend?"

"Promise you won't stay so mad at me?"

"I'll try. Promise not to expect miracles?"

"Can I hope?"

"Sure."

"We're friends then." Myrla drifted into slumber in the caress of Rankil's tousled hair, never stirring as Kaelan wrapped a blanket around the sleeping pair and tucked Myrla's other doll in her arms.

"First comes friendship," whispered Kaelan above Archell's snore.

"Then, what we have," Jewel said as she nuzzled a place in her partner's shoulder and slept.

Chapter Nine.

No one steals food for the thrill of anything more than survival.

-Olitti Judalaes Soon after the Pass End Feast, someone began stealing game from Rankil's snares. She followed the thief's tracks again and again but always came back empty handed, the prints so small they all but disappeared. Kaelan's attempts were no more fruitful. Whoever the culprit was, they took extreme measures to remain unseen.

"They're only taking what they need," said Kaelan between bites of leftover hopper leg. "There's always plenty for our eating. But I would like to know who's doing it."

"I find it unnerving," replied Jewel. "What if they're watching us?"

"If they were interested, they'd have contacted us," shrugged her broadback. "I say live and let live. They keep their distance, and we'll keep ours."

Jewel set down her mug. "But they could be the criminal element. Who else would live outside a compound or clan?"

"We are," replied Kaelan, waving the hopper bone her direction. "Are you guilty of some crime I should be aware of?"

Jewel placed one hand on her hip and laughed, "Like I'd tell you." She poured fresh tea and stoked the fire. "Did Myrla tell you the milker is going dry?"

"Archell did. The boy misses his morning cup." Kaelan sipped from her mug and patted the ground mat. "Bring me that last chunk of leg then rest your wearies next to mine."

"Gladly." Jewel took a generous bite of the dark meat and handed Kaelan the remainder. "I don't understand how the creature could be going dry. The evening milking is as much as ever, but the morning"-Jewel scratched under the edge of her head scarf-"there's none to be had. It's almost as if-"

"As if someone is beating us to it?" Kaelan glanced to where the livestock sheltered. "Could you brew me a strong pot before you go to bed?"

"I'll brew for both of us. You're not standing watch by yourself."

"Serpent gentlewomen don't stand watch."

"It's not safe for you to stand alone." Jewel rose to her knees. "I'm sitting up with you."

"This is not your call. I'll take Rankil."

"Oh, take a child over me why don't you?" Jewel filled the teapot with fresh water.

"It's either her or Archell, and he's not a fighter." Kaelan pointed to his snoring form. "He still has night terrors concerning his father. I'll not give him more."

"Rankil has them, too." Jewel added several measures of ground leaves to the pot before she set it on the fire rock.

"Not as often." Kaelan pulled her dagger to sharpen the blade.

"But they're much more violent." Jewel reminded her above the scraping. "Please, let them rest."

"No, Jewel."

"I'll be awake worrying over you anyway."

"No!"

"That's all right, Jewel. I'm awake." Rankil rolled to face the fire. "I can't seem to sleep tonight anyway." She reached for her boots. "Besides, I'm anxious to see who's been robbing my snares."

"You can't sleep again?" Jewel bent to roll Rankil's blanket furs. "If you don't begin sleeping, Mother help me, I'll pin you down and phase you out." She stomped past Kaelan and tossed the bedding in a corner. "Honestly, Kae, I'd think you'd have the sense to let the taller, stronger members of the family do the protecting."

"I am!" declared Kaelan. "That's Rankil and me."

"It's not." Jewel drew herself up proudly. "I'm the tallest next to you."

"Stand next to Rankil." Kaelan arranged them back to back then held her hands on the top of their heads. "Step away and see for yourself."

Jewel laughed when she stepped away. "Bless your soul, Rankil, at this rate you'll outgrow Kaelan. But"-she flexed a lean bicep- "it doesn't answer the question of brawn."

"Oh," replied Kaelan so Jewel might not take offense, "I believe it does. Show her what we've been doing with our mapping time, daughter."