"Will you take my friendships from me as well as my----? Oh, I won't endure it!"
She had given him his hint in the midst of what seemed her greatest wrath. His frown persisted, but a smile bent his lips again.
"Mr Dale," said he, "it is hard to reason with a lady before another gentleman. I was wrong to bid you go. But will you suffer me to retire to that room again?"
I bowed low.
"And," he went on, "will you excuse our hostess' presence for awhile?"
I bowed again.
"No, I won't go with you," cried Nell.
"Nay, but, Nelly, you will," said he, smiling now. "Come, I'm old and mighty ugly, and Mr Dale is a strapping fellow. You must be kind to the unfortunate, Nelly."
She was holding my hand still. The King took hers. Very slowly and reluctantly she let him draw her away. I did what seemed best to do; I sighed very heavily and plaintively, and bowed in sad submission.
"Wait till we return," said the King, and his tone was kind.
They pa.s.sed out together, and I, laughing yet ashamed to laugh, flung myself in a chair. She would not keep him for herself alone; nay, as all the world knows, she made but a drawn battle of it with the Frenchwoman; but the disaster and utter defeat which had threatened her she had averted, jealousy had achieved what love could not, he would not let her go now, when another's arms seemed open for her. To this success I had helped her. On my life I was glad to have helped her. But I did not yet see how I had helped my own cause.
I was long in the room alone, and though the King had bidden me await his return, he did not come again. Nell came alone, laughing, radiant and triumphant; she caught me by both hands, and swiftly, suddenly, before I knew, kissed me on the cheek. Nay, come, let me be honest; I knew a short moment before, but on my honour I could not avoid it courteously.
"We've won," she cried. "I have what I desire, and you, Simon, are to seek him at Whitehall. He has forgiven you all your sins and--yes, he'll give you what favour you ask. He has pledged his word to me."
"Does he know what I shall ask?"
"No, no, not yet. Oh, that I could see his face! Don't spare him, Simon. Tell him--why, tell him all the truth--every word of it, the stark bare truth."
"How shall I say it?"
"Why, that you love, and have ever loved, and will ever love Mistress Barbara Quinton, and that you love not, and will never love, and have never loved, no, nor cared the price of a straw for Eleanor Gwyn."
"Is that the whole truth?" said I.
She was holding my hands still; she pressed them now and sighed lightly.
"Why, yes, it's the whole truth. Let it be the whole truth, Simon. What matters that a man once lived when he's dead, or once loved when he loves no more?"
"Yet I won't tell him more than is true," said I.
"You'll be ashamed to say anything else?" she whispered, looking up into my face.
"Now, by Heaven, I'm not ashamed," said I, and I kissed her hand.
"You're not?"
"No, not a whit. I think I should be ashamed, had my heart never strayed to you."
"Ah, but you say 'strayed'!"
I made her no answer, but asked forgiveness with a smile. She drew her hand sharply away, crying,
"Go your ways, Simon Dale, go your ways; go to your Barbara, and your Hatchstead, and your dulness, and your righteousness."
"We part in kindness?" I urged.
For a moment I thought she would answer peevishly, but the mood pa.s.sed, and she smiled sincerely on me as she replied:
"Ay, in all loving-kindness, Simon; and when you hear the sour gird at me, say--why, say, Simon, that even a severe gentleman, such as you are, once found some good in Nelly. Will you say that for me?"
"With all my heart."
"Nay, I care not what you say," she burst out, laughing again. "Begone, begone! I swore to the King that I would speak but a dozen words to you.
Begone!"
I bowed and turned towards the door. She flew to me suddenly, as if to speak, but hesitated. I waited for her; at last she spoke, with eyes averted and an unusual embarra.s.sment in her air.
"If--if you're not ashamed to speak my name to Mistress Barbara, tell her I wish her well, and pray her to think as kindly of me as she can."
"She has much cause to think kindly," said I.
"And will therefore think unkindly! Simon, I bid you begone."
She held out her hand to me, and I kissed it again.
"This time we part for good and all," said she. "I've loved you, and I've hated you, and I have nearly loved you. But it is nothing to be loved by me, who love all the world."
"Nay, it's something," said I. "Fare you well."
I pa.s.sed out, but turned to find her eyes on me. She was laughing and nodding her head, swaying to and fro on her feet as her manner was. She blew me a kiss from her lips. So I went, and my life knew her no more.
But when the strict rail on sinners, I guard my tongue for the sake of Nelly and the last kiss she gave me on my cheek.
CHAPTER XXV
THE MIND OF M. DE FONTELLES
As I made my way through the Court nothing seemed changed; all was as I had seen it when I came to lay down the commission that Mistress Gwyn had got me. They were as careless, as merry, as shameless as before; the talk then had been of Madame's coming, now it was of her going; they talked of Dover and what had pa.s.sed there, but the treaty was dismissed with a shrug, and the one theme of interest, and the one subject of wagers, was whether or how soon Mlle. de Querouaille would return to the sh.o.r.es and the monarch she had left. In me distaste now killed curiosity; I pushed along as fast as the throng allowed me, anxious to perform my task and be quit of them all as soon as I could. My part there was behind me; the prophecy was fulfilled, and my ambitions quenched. Yet I had a pleasure in the remaining scene of the comedy which I was to play with the King; I was amused also to see how those whom I knew to be in the confidence of the Duke of York and of Arlington eyed me with mingled fear and wariness, and hid distrust under a most deferential civility. They knew, it seemed, that I had guessed their secrets. But I was not afraid of them, for I was no more their rival in the field of intrigue or in their a.s.sault upon the King's favour. I longed to say to them, "Be at peace. In an hour from now you will see my face no more."
The King sat in his chair, alone save for one gentleman who stood beside him. I knew the Earl of Rochester well by repute, and had been before now in the same company, although, as it chanced, I had never yet spoken with him. I looked for the King's brother and for Monmouth, but neither was to be seen. Having procured a gentleman to advise the King of my presence, I was rewarded by being beckoned to approach immediately. But when he had brought me there, he gave me no more than a smile, and, motioning me to stand by him, continued his conversation with my Lord Rochester and his caresses of the little dog on his lap.
"In defining it as the device by which the weak intimidate the strong,"
observed Rochester, "the philosopher declared the purpose of virtue rather than its effect. For the strong are not intimidated, while the weak, falling slaves to their own puppet, grow more helpless still."