I was naked now, completely naked, completely exposed to this man I barely knew.

"You're absolutely beautiful, I'm going to f.u.c.k every single inch of you completely senseless," Mark murmured, and I could practically feel my legs weakening.

"Oh G.o.d yes, give it to me, right now," I begged. "I want you so bad!"

"I'll give it to you when I'm good and ready," he growled into my ear, his low, hoa.r.s.e, manly voice driving me insane. I couldn't understand why I was reacting like this, why I absolutely loved the way Mar was completely dominating me with only his body and his words.

The next thing I knew Mark had picked me up and hoisted me over his shoulder like I weighed absolutely nothing. He carried me into the bedroom of his suite before placing me half-gently, half-roughly onto the bed, throwing me back into the comfortable mattress. The bed was quite high up, it must have been around waist high, and I instantly knew this was one of the more expensive suites in the hotel. It took me a second before I realized how exposed I was with my legs splayed open, Mark standing over top of me, looking at my most sensitive parts, parts that hadn't been looked at by a man in so long.

Instinctively, I closed my legs.

"No, open them for me, Caroline," Mark ordered. I paused for a second. I didn't know what to do. Then, as though my body was operating as a completely separate ent.i.ty from my brain, my legs opened once more, displaying the folds of my s.e.x to him. I could feel my face burning, and yet, something about him made me obey.

"Good," he told me. "G.o.d, you have a s.e.xy p.u.s.s.y."

Tingles ran through my body. I looked down at his pants. I could see his erection bulging, straining against the fabric, desperate to be released. I could tell he was big, but just how big I wasn't sure.

"Now turn around, give me a look at the other side."

This time there was no hesitation. I did exactly as Mark asked, even if I didn't know why. I could hear him unzipping his pants, taking off his shirt, and after a few seconds I couldn't help myself, I looked back.

When I saw his erection, I gasped. I could tell from his pants he was big, but I hadn't expected him to be quite as big as he was. I briefly wondered if he was going to be able to fit inside of me, but before I got the chance, he moved over to the edge of the bed, sliding in between my legs, his thick member pressing against the folds of my s.e.x.

"You're like a furnace down here," Mark murmured as his fingers found my s.e.x. I gasped, wanting more from him. I needed more. His fingers roamed carefully, softly, his every touch like velvet against my skin. I threw my head back as fire ran through me. I had never experienced anything like this before. It felt so good, and yet it was never enough. I wanted more! I could feel pressure building inside of me. I had a primal need to have Mark inside of me, and with every inch he moved his fingers in between the folds of my p.u.s.s.y, I was all too aware that as good as it felt, it wasn't the stiff shaft that I wanted in me.

Suddenly he stood up once more, rubbing his shaft in the juices that were practically spilling out of me.

"Good girl, now here's your reward," Mark told me with a grin as he pressed up against my entrance. I gasped inwardly as Mark slipped inside of me. It had been so long since I'd had s.e.x and he was so huge that it was a tight fit, my walls stretching to accommodate him. Mark was patient, allowing my body to conform to his girth for a minute before he began to slide in and out of me.

I closed my eyes and threw my head back as he started off slowly, tantalizingly, every movement of his hardness inside of me obviously designed to elicit pleasure, and holy s.h.i.t did he succeed. As he picked up the pace, Mark moved like a piston, every thrust bringing me to new heights of pleasure I never would have fathomed.

This was exactly what I had expected, exactly what I had hoped for since I'd first laid eyes on him. These feelings, this pleasure running through me, it was like nothing I'd ever experienced on this earth. Yes, I'd had s.e.x before, I'd had boyfriends before, but this was different. It had never been anything like this. This felt like I was giving up control completely, like I was giving myself to Mark entirely.

I could feel the pressure inside of me building. I knew I wasn't going to be able to take it for much longer. And sure enough, with one final thrust, my body exploded with pleasure, the o.r.g.a.s.m overtaking me completely.

"Oh s.h.i.t! Oh Mark, I'm coming!" I cried, unable to contain myself. I squeezed my eyes shut, stars dancing across my vision as my body was racked with waves of pleasure unlike any I'd ever felt before. This was more than an o.r.g.a.s.m, this was the definition of bliss, of heaven. My toes curled and my muscles tensed, every single fiber in my body focused entirely on the eliciting every little drop of pleasure Mark was giving me.

It felt like an eternity and only seconds pa.s.sed simultaneously before I found myself coming back down to earth. As I did so, Mark began to thrust harder and faster, I could tell his own o.r.g.a.s.m was imminent, and a few seconds later he grunted a few times and pressed hard inside of me, his hot seed shooting deep into me.

He lay on top of me for a minute, both of us enjoying the feeling of him lying still inside of me, before he rolled over and collapsed on the bed next to me.

We were both obviously completely spent. A light sheen of sweat covered my skin, I was exhausted, but at the same time, I hadn't felt this relaxed in years.

"I never thought this was going to happen when I got on that plane," I finally laughed, turning to look at Mark. He was so perfect, his hair slightly damp from effort, his smile effortless. The last streaks of sunlight streamed through the room, illuminating his face in a soft light that made him glow, and I suddenly began to regret the fact that I wouldn't see him again after tonight.

"See, it wasn't that bad, was it?" he asked.

"Not at all! You were right," I laughed.

I went into the bathroom to have a quick shower. His suite was pure luxury, with marble everything in the bathroom. And I thought our room was nice, I thought to myself as I got into the large walk in shower.

As the hot water pooled over me, steam fogging up the gla.s.s, I began to suddenly realize what I had done. Oh my G.o.d. I couldn't believe it. I'd just had a one night stand. I'd gone home with a guy I barely knew, let him f.u.c.k me in his hotel room. This wasn't the sort of thing I did, ever. Like definitely not. This was exactly the sort of thing I spent my entire life trying to avoid.

But it felt so good. I couldn't deny that. It had felt good. It had felt more than good, it had felt amazing. However, that didn't matter. The fact was, it was a mistake. A s.e.xy, incredible mistake, but it was a mistake I absolutely couldn't repeat. I didn't have any control over this situation. I needed to have control. I always needed to be in control of my life.

When I got out of the shower, Mark was lying on the bed, wrapped in a towel, watching TV. He grinned at me.

"Coming back for more?" he asked, motioning to the bed next to him.

"Actually, if you don't mind I think I might head back down to my room," I replied. They were among the hardest words I'd ever had to say. I wanted more than anything to accept his invitation, lie down on the bed next to him and let him ravage me for the rest of the night.

"Aw, that's too bad. Do you want me to walk you down?"

"No, thanks though. Seriously, I want to stay, but I... I shouldn't."

"Alright, up to you. Hey, Caroline?"

"Yeah?"

"I really enjoyed tonight."

"Me too."

I didn't understand why there was a sinking feeling in my stomach as I left his apartment. It felt like someone had punched me in the gut. Every part of my body wanted me to go back to him, to enjoy whatever time we could have together, but I knew it was wrong. Mark was a memory now, a happy memory that I knew I would enjoy for the rest of my life, but that I also knew I wouldn't experience again.

When I got back to the room I shared with Lisa, she practically attacked me when I walked in the door.

"Where the h.e.l.l were you?"

"What? I went to my surfing lesson."

"Yeah, like ten hours ago! I thought you'd drowned!"

"Sorry, Lisa. I did actually have an accident on the beach, and this guy saved me, and then he wanted to buy me a drink, and I thought it would be rude seeing as he was the reason I was alive and all."

This realization of exactly what I had been doing made Lisa change her tune instantly.

"Are you serious? Oh my G.o.d, Caroline! And after all your going on about how that wasn't the type of woman you are!"

I could feel the blush rising up my face. Lisa was embarra.s.sing me, and not only did she know it, she relished it.

"Little virgin Caroline, you're a big girl now!"

"Shut up, you know d.a.m.n well I wasn't a virgin."

"You have to tell me everything!" Lisa ordered, jumping onto the bed to sit next to me. "No. Not here. This requires celebration. Let's go down to the bar and then you can tell me everything."

I laughed as Caroline practically dragged me out of the room.

"Hold on, I'm barely dressed, let me put something decent on first," I begged. Lisa was like a kid who had just been told they're going to Disneyland. I couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm. I couldn't believe I was actually going to tell her what had happened. I wanted to keep it to myself, but she had obviously figured it out, and I knew there was no point in lying to her.

Ten minutes later we were down at the bar and I recounted my entire day to Lisa, her eyes glued to me the entire time.

"If it wasn't for the fact that I know you don't have the imagination to make something like that up, I literally would not believe that story."

"I'm not sure, but I think you just insulted me."

"Probably, but you know what? I don't care. Every woman on the planet wants to be able to tell a story like that, and yet you're the one who actually gets to tell it."

"Maybe, but I didn't really want to."

"You didn't want to have s.e.x with him?"

"No, it's not that. It's more... I didn't want to lose control like that. There was something about him, something really primal, really dominating. None of my old boyfriends were like that at all."

"That's because your old boyfriends were an accountant and a guy who preferred video games to having s.e.x with you. No offense, but your old boyfriends weren't exactly studs."

"Hey, that's mean!" I replied, offended. Sure, my old boyfriends hadn't been the manliest people, but I had liked them at the time. Of course, those relationships had all ended, some of them badly.

"Well, did you like it?"

"Did I like what?"

"Being dominated."

"The weird thing is, I did. It's so unlike me. I didn't think I'd like it at all."

"That's totally normal. Especially since you're a control freak in real life, I'm totally not surprised that you like to give it up in the bedroom."

"Oh my G.o.d, don't say it like that Lisa!" I hissed, mortified at the casual way she was talking about this. She laughed in reply.

"Don't be such a prude. As I said, it's totally normal. Sometimes I get Rob to tie me up and..."

"Ewww, TMI, stop that sentence right now!" I interrupted, covering my ears.

"Oh you're such a baby."

"Maybe, but I don't want to hear about you and Rob's s.e.x life."

"Why not? I just listened to yours."

"Yeah, but you're a pervert."

"One day, when you hit p.u.b.erty, you'll understand," Lisa retorted, sticking her tongue out and ordering another drink.

Despite Lisa's a.s.surances, I lay awake in my bed that night, staring at the ceiling. I had never been so confused about anything before in my life. This wasn't the sort of thing I normally did. I wasn't that kind of woman. It's not like I had anything against people who had one night stands, absolutely not. It just wasn't the sort of thing I personally did.

And yet, I'd done it. More than that, Mark had completely dominated me, and I liked it! Why the h.e.l.l did my body react the way it did? Had it just been so long since I'd had any s.e.x at all that anything would have turned me on? It had to be something like that.

Eventually I told myself it didn't matter. I was never going to see Mark again anyway. We were leaving in less than 48 hours. In two days I'd be back in Minneapolis, back to my predictable life. I could go back to work, back to a.n.a.lyzing stock data. After all, it was what I did best. This had been a great holiday, but it was time to check back in to reality.

Sure enough, as we flew back to Minneapolis, I leaned back in my seat. I hadn't seen Mark since that night, and now I was definitely never going to see him again. h.e.l.l, even if I wanted to, I didn't even know his last name. He was a memory now, a memory that caused a flicker in my nether regions every time I thought about it.

For Lisa's part, she took great joy in my torment about it. She teased me constantly, knowing how uncomfortable it made me. But even so, life quickly settled back in to normal. There was always more paperwork to do, more to fill out. And yet, I still found my mind drifting away in the middle of the day. I'd stare out the window of my little office at the great view of the parking lot and think about Hawaii, think about that night with Mark. I tried to force those thoughts to the back of my head, but no matter what, I couldn't stop thinking about him. You need a hobby or something, seriously. You're acting like some sort of s.e.x crazed maniac I thought to myself as I fantasized about Mark once more.

He was pretty much the s.e.xiest, nicest, best guy in bed I could possibly imagine. There was literally nothing he'd ever done that felt weird, creepy or anything like that. He was perfect. It was too bad I was never going to see him again.

Two weeks after I came back from Hawaii, I was settling in for an evening of relaxing in front of the TV. I decided to do some laundry, so wearing my pyjamas I shoved one of those 'healthy' TV dinners in the microwave and started flipping through the channels. I had a pile of work to do in the spare bedroom that had been turned into a home office, but whatever. It was Friday, the work I had to do could totally wait until the weekend. Right now, I was going to catch up on the episodes of CSI I'd missed.

Just as the microwave beeped to let me know my dinner was ready, there was a knock at the door. For a second I didn't even recognize the sound.

"What the h.e.l.l?" I muttered to myself. No one ever knocked at my door. The last time it happened had to be what three years ago, when Mr. Ulstein down the hall had collapsed and his wife needed me to call 911 because she couldn't see the numbers on the phone.

I opened the door, thankful that I lived in a safe enough neighborhood that I didn't need to worry about there not being a peep hole, and my mouth dropped open.

Mark was standing there. Mark, from Hawaii. s.e.xy Mark, with that wavy brown hair that drove me insane and those glistening blue eyes that seemed to look straight into my soul.

What the h.e.l.l was he doing here?

"What the h.e.l.l are you doing here?" I asked, not realizing that my mouth said the words I'd been thinking.

"What, no h.e.l.lo?" he asked with a grin. That was when I realized he had a small bouquet of flowers in his hand. An orchid, some daisies, a few other exotic flowers I didn't recognize. I'd never really been the flowers type of girl.

"No, you don't get a h.e.l.lo until you tell me what the h.e.l.l you're doing, standing here at my door?"

My privacy was enormously important to me. It was something I took very seriously, and I didn't like having a guy who was still pretty much a complete stranger finding out where I lived and showing up on my doorstep.

Mark's smile faded.

"I thought I'd surprise you, that's all," he said, looking a bit dejected.

"Surprises are good when they're not incredibly stalkerish," I replied. I might have been a bit harsher than I otherwise would have been, but this was serious to me. I placed a premium on my privacy. My mother spent years trying to figure out where I was, trying get back into my life, trying to suck the life and soul out of whatever happiness I had created for myself. It was incredibly important to me that I stay as hidden as possible, and a man I'd met one night showing up out of the blue, unexpected on my doorstep was a sign that I wasn't quite as hidden as I liked to imagine I was.

"Look, you're right," Mark replied, opening his arms wide, in a disarming way. "I'm completely out of line here. I'm going to go. Listen, here's my card. It's got my cell number on it. I'm going to be in town for another two days. If you want to meet, go out on a date, I'd love to see you again. If you don't, I understand. Sorry for crossing a line."

He placed the flowers in my arms, and the next thing I knew, he was gone. It was almost like he had never been there in the first place, but the business card and flowers in my hands proved otherwise.

As soon as I closed the door behind me once more I began to second guess my every move. I had never been the most self confident person, my mother spent my entire childhood making sure of that, but I didn't think I was this paranoid about everything.

Had I overreacted? Was that a totally normal thing for people to do? Should I have invited him in? No, it wasn't normal. It had definitely crossed over into the line of creepy.

But still, even if it was a bit creepy, even if it wasn't exactly what normal people did, should I call him? I wasn't sure. I stared at the card that I placed on the table while I got some water for the flowers. I briefly considered checking the flowers to make sure there wasn't a hidden camera in them or something, then scolded myself for being so paranoid and simply put them on the table.

I knew I was a very private person, but was I being too private? I wasn't sure. I tried to give Lisa a call, tried to get her advice, then remembered that she and Rob always went out for a romantic dinner on Friday nights. She would rave about how nice it was on Monday, like she always did. I smiled to myself as I thought about it.

I eventually caught up on those CSI episodes I was meaning to watch, but my brain was elsewhere. I spent the weekend wondering if I should call Mark. A couple of times I even picked up the phone and started dialing the number, but stopped myself. Why was I calling him? He was a one night stand with stalkerish tendencies that lived like six states away. There was no way this could be a relationship. And yet, a part of me kept trying. My body kept trying to get me to contact him. Was I that s.e.x starved, did I really enjoy that night with him so much that I was willing to do it again?