"Mama, stop. I can't take your money."

"It's only money-I wish I could give you more. Take something warm for tonight, okay?"

She shoved the roll into my hand. I couldn't refuse without insulting her so I shoved the cash into my bra.

"Thank you. I love you, Mama." She pulled me into an embrace and hugged me.

The sound of heavy boots on the wooden floors alerted us that someone was approaching. I moved away from Mama and grabbed a kitchen knife to help Esme peel the other vegetables on the counter. I didn't want anyone asking questions because I wasn't sure I would be able to keep my s.h.i.t together.

Mama busied herself at the sink, rinsing the dirty cups. And Esme-tears were streaming down her face and her nose was as red as her eyes. In front of her sat a neat heap of finely chopped onions.

Stunned, I looked up when Cobra walked into the kitchen as if it were perfectly natural. Was there nothing this man was afraid of?

"Just checking on you before I say goodbye," he said casually.

I nodded, unable to speak in case my voice gave away how much I was struggling to grasp all of what was happening.

"We could do with some help peeling carrots, if that's what you're asking," Esme answered through her sniffles. Trust her to be the one to save me.

The fact that Cobra bothered to come to check on us tugged at my heart. But what surprised me more was how he didn't come toward me. Instead he stopped in front of Mama, his eyes softening as he looked down at her.

"Mrs. Alvarez-"

"Maria," she corrected him, turning to give him a smile.

I witnessed how Cobra, rugged hard biker to the outside world, gently took my mother's hand in his and held it for a moment. "Thank you for your hospitality. I'm not sure when I will see you again. Please take care of yourself."

I watched as he leaned in and kissed her cheek. Mama patted his hand. "Ride safely. Promise me you will be careful on your journey back home."

Cobra grinned. He looked so handsome that my heart wanted to explode. He'd tied a bandana around his head and on any other man it would look silly, but he completely rocked it. Of course it helped that it was the same blue as his bright intelligent eyes.

"That's an easy promise to make. I will be extremely careful. You needn't worry."

"Thank you, Cobra," she said, leaning in to give the huge man a hug.

This was goodbye. Cobra probably never meant to come back.

More footsteps approached. Papa. I knew by the way he walked. As a child, my father had contracted polio and now one his legs was slightly shorter than the other. Although his shoes had been built up, I'd grown accustomed to the sound of his uneven steps.

"I must go," Cobra said. "The guys are waiting." He turned to me and smiled. "Till later," he said. He got to the door just as my father entered the kitchen.

Papa avoided my eyes. He spoke to my mother as if I weren't in the same room. "Tell the girls they can't go tonight. Esmerelda should give her mother our apologies. Alessandra should be ready for dinner at six. Don Pedro wants to eat early because he's tired. We agreed to leave the big talk for another night if the girl stayed home." The weariness in his voice almost made me feel sorry for him. Almost. If he hadn't made a deal with Don Pedro in the first place, I wouldn't be in this f.u.c.ked up position.

He turned and left the kitchen, going back to his uninvited guest. A moment later, motorcycles roared to life and then drove away.

What is going to happen to me?

"You heard your father," Mama said. "Go get ready for dinner. Esme, I will ask Eduardo to drop you back home."

I left the kitchen with Esme in tow. She closed my bedroom door and locked it.

"Listen to me. Don't worry." She reached out and placed her hand on my forehead, feeling for a fever. "You look sick."

"I feel sick. I want to throw up because I have to stay. Maybe I should poison his food and rid us all of him?"

"That's a great plan, except we don't have poison. But seriously, listen to me . . . when Eduardo drops me off I will go tell Cobra you will be ready to come over tonight. Have a long bath when I go and at dinner eat until you burst, then when he leaves get some sleep until I call you. If Cobra decides to leave tonight and take you with him, you will be up the rest of the night before you cross the border. It's going to be tough on the back of his bike for hours on end."

"Nothing can be tougher than staying here with the old man."

"I know, honey. But there's nothing we can do about that now without angering your father and the Don. So do as I told you and leave the rest to me. Keep your phone close so I can call you as soon as I've gone into the village and spoken to Cobra."

"Are you sure this will work out? I'm scared, Essie."

"The angels will protect you. And so will Cobra and his friends. You need to have faith. You've been so brave up to now-stay strong just a little longer, okay?"

"Okay."

There really wasn't much more I could do but trust in something bigger than me. I hoped my angels were wide awake. I'd be needing them.

Chapter 16 - Cobra.

"You've got to help me, brothers. We've got to get her out of here. I'd rather burn in h.e.l.l for eternity than watch Alessandra get married off to that old p.r.i.c.k." I looked at Razor, then Hammer, and finally rested my gaze on Ryder.

Ryder took a long drag of the cigarette hanging between his lips. He swatted at the mosquitos surrounding his face, grimacing. It was his second trip to Mexico and it didn't seem as if he were enjoying it much.

"f.u.c.k, Cobra, of all the women in the universe you decide you want this one? Why this p.u.s.s.y? What's so special about her?" He flicked the lighter on and off between his thumb and index finger, something he only did when he was uncertain or had doubts about something. Strange how well I knew him.

I shrugged. How could I explain it to a man who hated women? To Ryder every woman was a b.i.t.c.h who deserved to be treated like one. After what his mother had put him through, I doubted there was a woman alive who could make Ryder change his mind about females. He used them for s.e.x but that was about it.

The irony was that he wouldn't stand for anyone being mistreated-man, woman, child or animal. That was how I knew he had a heart of gold.

How could I tell him that since the first moment a child had touched my arm something had coursed through me if I didn't understand it? I mean, it sounded ridiculous even to myself. Yet it was there. Undeniable. A force so strong I was willing to sacrifice everything to have her as mine.

Crazy. You got the crazy genes that run in your blood.

"I'm not going to try and explain it to f.u.c.ktards like you. You wouldn't get it. But it's what I want. I've never been more certain of anything. So are you going to help me or not?"

"Sounds like fun. We haven't f.u.c.ked up s.h.i.t for a while, brother. I say why the f.u.c.k not?" Razor had that gleam in his eyes he got whenever he knew s.h.i.t was going down and he'd get to be part of the action.

Hammer nodded. "Let's teach these Mexican p.r.i.c.ks not to f.u.c.k with us. I'm in. As always, I have your back, brother."

I turned to Ryder. The scowl on his face didn't bode well. Conflicting emotions ran through his eyes.

"Ryder?" I opened and closed my fists, impatience getting the better of me.

He took a draw of the cigarette between his fingers and blew out a few circles of smoke, avoiding my gaze. After a long silence, he said, "Nah, this isn't what we came for and you know it. Your old man will toast us all for f.u.c.king up the mission. Since when did p.u.s.s.y become more important than the club?"

f.u.c.k. I sucked in air through my teeth. I needed all the brothers to agree on this to make it work.

It was dangerous.

Virtually impossible.

Totally insane.

And exactly what I needed to do. We had to smuggle Alessandra over the border. That was the easy part. Keeping her safe on the other side would be a lifelong mission.

"f.u.c.k, Ryder. One day you're going to find a p.u.s.s.y you are willing to risk your life for. She's going to turn your f.u.c.king world upside down and you'll be helpless to stop it." I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him. I needed him on my side.

"Ain't no p.u.s.s.y alive worth that much trouble. Are you thinking logically here, brother, or are you thinking with your d.i.c.k? You wanna risk all four of us-five, counting the girl-getting f.u.c.king killed because you decide this is the b.i.t.c.h you want in your bed? You're more stupid than I imagined."

I grabbed hold of his shirt and pulled Ryder to his feet. "I'm not asking you to understand. f.u.c.k, Ryder, don't force me to call back the one favor you owe me. I saved your f.u.c.king life, brother, and now I'm asking you this. We'll be even then."

He took a last draw from the cigarette and squashed it under his boot. "Yeah? You think all our lives are worth risking for a girl? You call up that debt and I have no option but to go along. But let me say this out loud and clear . . . no b.i.t.c.h is worth your brothers' lives. You've gone f.u.c.king crazy, man."

"It'll be fun, Ryder. Outsmarting these f.u.c.kers who think they have us by the b.a.l.l.s. Think of that." Razor was looking for a kill; he didn't care about the girl or the club. But at least he was on my side.

Scowling, I ground my teeth together. "Ryder, I was hoping I could count on you. That you'd have my back on this because we are brothers. Not because I call in a debt. You disappoint me."

Ryder smirked. "As you disappoint me. I'd thought if you ever called in the debt, it would be for a worthwhile cause. Not because your p.r.i.c.k has ruled your f.u.c.king head." He turned to Hammer. "Razor being a hothead and l.u.s.ting after action I can understand. But you . . . you're the smart one here, Hammer. Why the f.u.c.k would you have a death wish? You know the chance we'll get away with this is close to zero?"

Hammer took a moment to answer. I could see him weighing up the options in his brain as if he were speaking them out loud. He avoided both my and Ryder's gazes. Poor f.u.c.ker was stuck in the middle of two of his best friends. Choosing sides wouldn't be easy.

He shifted from one foot to the other before raking his fingers through his hair. "Well, I figure we have Daemon waiting on the other side with a few more brothers. He'll help us make a quick escape."

Ryder glared at him, making Hammer pull up both shoulders in self-defense. "I have a little sister, man. I'd hate to see her married off to an old p.r.i.c.k and become his f.u.c.king s.e.x slave. You know that's what will happen to the girl if we don't save her?"

Ryder dug in his heels. "It's not our f.u.c.king problem. What happens to the girl has been going on for centuries and will continue to happen to others. Saving this one isn't going to make any f.u.c.king difference."

"It will to me." I hit my chest with my fist. It hurt inside and out.

Ryder's eyes widened. "You f.u.c.king mean it, don't you?"

My gaze didn't waver from his. "Yes."

Shaking his head, Ryder said, "Now I've seen everything. It isn't a game to you. This b.i.t.c.h is something special."

Unable to speak, I simply nodded. The thought of Alessandra in that filthy man's paws was making me lose my mind. I was asking something of my brothers that I never thought I would.

"Supposing I agreed, what then? Have you thought further than your d.i.c.k?"

"It's more than my d.i.c.k. It's here." I punched my chest again. "And here," I said, pointing to my head. "And if that's what makes me crazy, I have a feeling I'm not the first man on this planet to go to war for p.u.s.s.y."

Ryder and Razor sn.i.g.g.e.red, as if the idea that a man would want to fight for one woman were insane. A while ago I would've agreed with them. But now I knew differently.

Alessandra was mine. No amount of rationalizing or explaining would change it. I saw it in her eyes. I felt it in her presence. This was it.

Ryder scrubbed a hand over his face, as if he were exhausted. He probably was after the long ride over and the heat, but I wanted a decision from him.

"Let me sleep on it. Of course you can command me to repay my debt if that's how you wanna play it . . . But now I know how much it means to you, I need to think it through."

The northern region of Mexico, bordering on the United States, was dry and arid, with a desert-like climate known for scorching hot summers with cold nights. I'd rather take the cold than the heat any time of the year. And chances of dehydration and exhaustion were lessened if we went in the night. I wanted to be over the border by dawn.

My chest tightened. "There's no time, Ryder. We have to do it soon. We have to make the run tonight if we can. Tomorrow night may be too late. Pedro may decide to take her with him." I ran my fingers through my hair. "f.u.c.k, we may be too late already . . ." Overcome with panic, my breathing became labored and shallow. I closed my eyes for a moment and took a few deep breaths to calm myself.

"I still think you've lost your f.u.c.king mind." Ryder gripped the back of the chair he was standing behind until his knuckles turned white.

"That may be true; I'm not going to argue about that. Esme is bringing Alessandra over after the dinner. I'll talk to her and make her the offer. Then we need to act before it's too late."

Ryder shrugged. He looked tired. "All I can say is that I pray I never get as c.u.n.t-struck as you. That would be the end of me. I'm going to take a nap while we wait."

I watched him pat Razor and Hammer on the back and slide his hands into his jeans pockets as he walked away. Everything hinged on Ryder seeing it my way. My nerves gnawed my guts. I felt sick.

"Listen, brothers, get some shut-eye. If we leave after midnight, it's going to be tough on our bodies. Get some rest."

Razor loved sleeping. It wasn't hard to convince him to have a late afternoon nap. Hammer on the other hand was a night owl and hardly ever napped, but he nodded, understanding the gravity of it all. I watched them go off to their shared motel room.

Was Ryder right? Was I s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g with death to get the woman I wanted? What he'd said about the club and risking our lives was true. Yet, in spite of everything, I couldn't help myself. There was no way I was leaving this place without her.

No f.u.c.king way.

Chapter 17 - Cobra.

I'd hardly slept at all, tossing and turning on the squeaky bed, sweat dripping from my body in spite of having the fan on at full force and causing a mini hurricane in my room.

Every half an hour I'd crank an eye open to peek at my watch. The evening was crawling. It felt as if hours had pa.s.sed, yet each time I checked my watch it was only five or ten minutes later. I wouldn't feel better until Esme brought Alessandra to the motel.

We were lucky to have Esmerelda as a go-between. She'd come to talk to me earlier and we'd had a long chat about her best friend, the Don and the safest way to help Alessandra. I would've preferred to speak to Alessandra myself, but I understood the risks and wanted to cut down both girls' exposure to danger.

Everything that had happened mulled through my mind. And every time I came back to the same conclusion. For me, there was no other option.

Two hours later, with my body aching from rolling around on an uncomfortably hard mattress, I got up in search of coffee. Ideally something stronger would be better, but I had to keep my mind clear.