I solemnly said, “Nier, I still want to go . ”

Nier sat up from the ground and, hopeless, she sighed: “Did you go see Lucia? Why is that that you randomly get excited every time after seeing her? Dear, do you really want to go?”

I affirmatively nodded: “Ah, I do . I won’t let you go alone . I’ll come with you . Nier, I really want to go . I want to witness this . I want to kill the wyrm for myself; not for Ying and Xia . Just for myself . Nier, I really want to go . I really want to go!”

Nier let out a heavy sigh: “I shall choose to do my best, since you have made your decision . Dear, we shall go, as you want to slay it, but you must keep yourself safe . Don’t let anything happen to you . ”

I nodded, and then walked up to Nier’s side to give her a gentle hug . She didn’t speak or hug me back . She just stayed in my embrace . I gently stroked her back then softly asked, “What’s wrong, Nier . Are you angry?”

“Mm,” responded Nier, in a m.u.f.fled voice . She chose to be forthright: “I’m truly very angry . I’m not angry at you but myself, and I’m jealous . I’m jealous of Lucia . I’m the same as her . I’m your wife, as well, and you promised to not be bias, but I’m still very jealous of her . ”

“Why?”

That was what I afraid of most when it came to my wives . I treated Lucia and Nier the same way . I was afraid of one of them would say I was bias towards one of them . I, therefore, did my best to spend the same amount of time with each of them and split things evenly between them . I felt that was treating them equally .

“Because…” replied Nier, hesitant .

Nier raised her head . She had emotionless eyes in the past . This time, she revealed a strong reluctance this time, nonetheless . Her jealousy was strong enough to turn to hate . She took in a deep breath as though she was doing her best to stop herself from crying .

“I’m jealous . Too jealous . Why? Why is Lucia is able to raise your spirits every time…? Why do you seek her out whenever you can’t think things through? She can definitely raise your spirit, too . Why can she raise your spirit, yet I am forever stuck making you feel troubled…? I’m honestly  jealous of her . Very jealous . Why…? How can she… understand you so well…?”

Nier’s tears started to slowly course down her face . Some say that tears taste sweet if they’re tears of joy, while tears taste salty if they’re tears of sadness . I suppose tears of despair and jealousy must taste as bitter as bile . She grabbed me tightly . In a shaky voice, she elaborated, “I’m honestly very jealous of her . Lucia understands you so well, while I don’t understand you at all… I don’ know… what you want to do and why you want to do things…”

I gently stroked Nier’s back . Voice quiet, I explained, “It’s all right, it’s all right, Nier . Lucia understands me, for we’ve been together for a very long time . Lucia and I are childhood friends . We’ve been together, since we were young . That’s how Lucia knows me so well . Lucia knows what I want to do and what exactly I want . ”

Nier tightly gripped my chest and loudly shouted, “That’s why I’m jealous of her!! She’s far too high above me! Lucia spent too much time with you before I knew you . I thought time didn’t matter; I thought I could catch up, but I now finally understand that it’s not the case . Lucia grew up with you, so she understands you . You’ll always think of her whenever you’re at a loss . Why don’t you come to see me? Why…? Why…? I feel I’m s inferior to Lucia… But you only feel that Lucia can provide you with direction when you’re a t a loss… Why do you trust her so much…? Why can’t you reach out to me the same way?”

I had no argument, because Nier was right, for that was how I saw Lucia and Nier . Unlike my love with Nier, my love with Lucia didn’t comprise of a nightlife . We sometimes wouldn’t even be intimate, even during the day, but I’d seek out Lucia when someone tries to stop me and when I didn’t know what to do . It was probably because I trusted Lucia, and she always knew what exactly I wanted .  Lucia knew what I wanted and thought better than myself . Moreover, she always stood by my side, regardless of what I said or wanted to do . She wouldn’t complain and protected me whenever I was in danger .

I think the time advantage in my relations.h.i.+p with Lucia was what made our relations.h.i.+p deeper than my relations.h.i.+p with Nier . Lucia and I didn’t need to cling together to share the same thoughts . Lucia and I weren’t a sweet couple, but the sort of couple that was comparable to a tranquil lake, and we had absolute faith in each other .

I believed Lucia would protect me, and I trusted her to support me . Similarly, Lucia would trust me and walk side by side with me .

I gave Nier a light hug, and then comforted her in a soft voice: “It’s all right, Nier . The only reason Lucia and I consult each other often, is because we were always together before, not because I love her more than you . I love you, too, Nier . My love for you is the same as my love for Lucia . I can’t say that I can give you exactly what you want, but I can guarantee I’ll give you my best the same way I do for Lucia . Nier, I spent a very long time with Lucia . In the past, we were together, but that’s fine . We don’t have a past, but we have a future . As long as we’re together, we can be the same, as well . ”

Nier softly sobbed and rested her head on my chest . I didn’t continue to say anything . I, instead, hugged her tighter and slowly stroked her back and long black hair . She tightened her arms around me and quietly replied, “We will definitely have a future me . We will definitely have a future . I hope there will come a day where you can be by my side when you’re confused and lost . I won’t make you feel troubled again . I promise to do my best to understand you . I promise… Dear, in the future…”

“There won’t be ‘in the future’, Nier . I’ll always be by your side in the future . I promise . This is the last time I’ll be wilful . Believe me, Nier . I’ll be by your side in the future . I promise to be by our child’s side . I won’t endanger myself again . I promise…”

I solemnly said, “Nier, I still want to go . ”.

Nier sat up from the ground and, hopeless, she sighed: “Did you go see Lucia? Why is that that you randomly get excited every time after seeing her? Dear, do you really want to go?”.

I affirmatively nodded: “Ah, I do . I won’t let you go alone . I’ll come with you . Nier, I really want to go . I want to witness this . I want to kill the wyrm for myself; not for Ying and Xia . Just for myself . Nier, I really want to go . I really want to go!”.

Nier let out a heavy sigh: “I shall choose to do my best, since you have made your decision . Dear, we shall go, as you want to slay it, but you must keep yourself safe . Don’t let anything happen to you . ”.

I nodded, and then walked up to Nier’s side to give her a gentle hug . She didn’t speak or hug me back . She just stayed in my embrace . I gently stroked her back then softly asked, “What’s wrong, Nier . Are you angry?”.

“Mm,” responded Nier, in a m.u.f.fled voice . She chose to be forthright: “I’m truly very angry . I’m not angry at you but myself, and I’m jealous . I’m jealous of Lucia . I’m the same as her . I’m your wife, as well, and you promised to not be bias, but I’m still very jealous of her . ”.

“Why?”.

That was what I afraid of most when it came to my wives . I treated Lucia and Nier the same way . I was afraid of one of them would say I was bias towards one of them . I, therefore, did my best to spend the same amount of time with each of them and split things evenly between them . I felt that was treating them equally

“Because…” replied Nier, hesitant

Nier raised her head . She had emotionless eyes in the past . This time, she revealed a strong reluctance this time, nonetheless . Her jealousy was strong enough to turn to hate . She took in a deep breath as though she was doing her best to stop herself from crying

“I’m jealous . Too jealous . Why? Why is Lucia is able to raise your spirits every time…? Why do you seek her out whenever you can’t think things through? She can definitely raise your spirit, too . Why can she raise your spirit, yet I am forever stuck making you feel troubled…? I’m honestly  jealous of her . Very jealous . Why…? How can she… understand you so well…?”.

Nier’s tears started to slowly course down her face . Some say that tears taste sweet if they’re tears of joy, while tears taste salty if they’re tears of sadness . I suppose tears of despair and jealousy must taste as bitter as bile . She grabbed me tightly . In a shaky voice, she elaborated, “I’m honestly very jealous of her . Lucia understands you so well, while I don’t understand you at all… I don’ know… what you want to do and why you want to do things…”.

I gently stroked Nier’s back . Voice quiet, I explained, “It’s all right, it’s all right, Nier . Lucia understands me, for we’ve been together for a very long time . Lucia and I are childhood friends . We’ve been together, since we were young . That’s how Lucia knows me so well . Lucia knows what I want to do and what exactly I want . ”.

Nier tightly gripped my chest and loudly shouted, “That’s why I’m jealous of her!! She’s far too high above me! Lucia spent too much time with you before I knew you . I thought time didn’t matter; I thought I could catch up, but I now finally understand that it’s not the case . Lucia grew up with you, so she understands you . You’ll always think of her whenever you’re at a loss . Why don’t you come to see me? Why…? Why…? I feel I’m s inferior to Lucia… But you only feel that Lucia can provide you with direction when you’re a t a loss… Why do you trust her so much…? Why can’t you reach out to me the same way?”.

I had no argument, because Nier was right, for that was how I saw Lucia and Nier . Unlike my love with Nier, my love with Lucia didn’t comprise of a nightlife . We sometimes wouldn’t even be intimate, even during the day, but I’d seek out Lucia when someone tries to stop me and when I didn’t know what to do . It was probably because I trusted Lucia, and she always knew what exactly I wanted .  Lucia knew what I wanted and thought better than myself . Moreover, she always stood by my side, regardless of what I said or wanted to do . She wouldn’t complain and protected me whenever I was in danger

I think the time advantage in my relations.h.i.+p with Lucia was what made our relations.h.i.+p deeper than my relations.h.i.+p with Nier . Lucia and I didn’t need to cling together to share the same thoughts . Lucia and I weren’t a sweet couple, but the sort of couple that was comparable to a tranquil lake, and we had absolute faith in each other

I believed Lucia would protect me, and I trusted her to support me . Similarly, Lucia would trust me and walk side by side with me

I gave Nier a light hug, and then comforted her in a soft voice: “It’s all right, Nier . The only reason Lucia and I consult each other often, is because we were always together before, not because I love her more than you . I love you, too, Nier . My love for you is the same as my love for Lucia . I can’t say that I can give you exactly what you want, but I can guarantee I’ll give you my best the same way I do for Lucia . Nier, I spent a very long time with Lucia . In the past, we were together, but that’s fine . We don’t have a past, but we have a future . As long as we’re together, we can be the same, as well . ”.

Nier softly sobbed and rested her head on my chest . I didn’t continue to say anything . I, instead, hugged her tighter and slowly stroked her back and long black hair . She tightened her arms around me and quietly replied, “We will definitely have a future me . We will definitely have a future . I hope there will come a day where you can be by my side when you’re confused and lost . I won’t make you feel troubled again . I promise to do my best to understand you . I promise… Dear, in the future…”.

“There won’t be ‘in the future’, Nier . I’ll always be by your side in the future . I promise . This is the last time I’ll be wilful . Believe me, Nier . I’ll be by your side in the future . I promise to be by our child’s side . I won’t endanger myself again . I promise…”.

 .