Jim nodded. "Yes, sir." His heart somersaulted with joy and pain. "Alex isreally staying here?"

"Waiting to see you."

If only he could see Alex one last time. "Sir, could you let her know I'm atthe MASH unit gettin' patched up?"

A slight thaw came to Breckenridge's narrowed eyes. "She's at the same unityou're going to. I'll make sure she knows you've arrived."

"Thank you, sir." Jim had spent a year with Matt Bieckenridge and his reconteam. He knew the officer was an honorable man with clear-cut values. "I'm sorry to put you in this jam, sir."

Breckenridge smiled briefly. "Don't be."

Jim stared at the officer. "I refuse to pick up a rifle again, sir."

"I know that." The lieutenant's mouth compressed. "We each have our limit. Youreached yours with Kim. Someday, I'll probably reach mine, too."

It meant a lot to Jim that Breckenridge didn't see him as a deserter or acoward. "Thanks for understanding, Lieutenant."

Breckenridge slowed and opened the door that led to the emergency-roomfacilities of the MASH unit. His gray eyes narrowed with intensity. "I'm goingto do everything humanly possible to help you. But I'll tell you right now, Idon't think it's going to be enough. I'm the one who's sorry. You're a goodmarine, and you don't deserve the way they're going to use you as ascapegoat."

Jim understood only too well. The corps had a proud tradition to uphold, andwith the war starting to escalate in earnest, they didn't want a black eye inthe media with a marine refusing to bear arms against the enemy. As he hobbledinto the facility, greeted by nurses in green shirts and slacks, Jim knew hisfreedom was at an end. All he wanted-all he needed- was to see Alex one last time. He was about to ask, when Breckenridge gripped his shoulder.

"I'll go find Miss Vance for you."

Tears stung Jim's eyes and he quickly looked away from the marine officer.Breckenridge was the kind of man Jim would have died for, if necessary. Thefact that the officer would put his career on the line to defend Jim wa.s.simply amazing. Breckenridge understood why Jim could never pick up a rifleagain. And so did Alex. But they were the only two people in the world whoever would.

The brig guards remained at the tent entrance, never taking their eyes off Jimas a doctor and nurse maneuvered him around on a gurney. He lay quietly,knowing the medical team would x-ray his leg, make a cast for it and patch upthe various other wounds he'd gotten in the past couple days on thatG.o.dforsaken hill.

Tiredness lapped at him. As they wheeled him down the hall to the X-ray room,he closed his eyes. Like everyone else, he'd only gotten s.n.a.t.c.hes of sleep inthe last forty-eight hours. In moments, Jim spiraled into an exhaustedslumber, oblivious to the building storm that surrounded him.

Chapter Eight.

Jim was jolted awake as they wheeled him out of X ray and back to theemergency room. To his surprise, he saw Alex waiting for him, draped in along, light blue cotton robe, her left arm in a clean white sling. Jimcouldn't hide his reaction to her. Even though the brig guards were watchinghim, disgust written on their every feature, and his skipper was there, too,Jim couldn't control the gamut of emotions rushing through him.

Alex's gray eyes shone with love, the welcome in them undeniable. Jim sat up.He wanted to protect her from himself, from what he knew was going to happento him.

"Jim?"

He winced inwardly, the quaver in her low voice tearing at him. As she drewnear his gurney and held out her hand, he took it.

A lump formed in his throat. "How you doin', gal?"

"Okay. I was worried sick for you. I heard the VC almost took back the hill."She choked back a sob. "I had these horrible dreams that you might be killed."

The ache to sweep her into his arms was overwhelming. Just the femininestrength of her fingers made him want to cry. Clearing his throat, Jim forceda slight, one-cornered smile for her benefit. "I made it back alive, that'sall that counts. Look at you, all gussied up. Your hair's washed. I didn'trealize it had gold threads of sunlight in it."

Jim sat up on the gurney, still dressed in his filthy, foul-smelling clothes.Alex realized that he was beyond exhaustion, his eyes red-rimmed and dark. Hedesperately needed a bath, some sleep and some food. His face appeared evenmore gaunt than she recalled. She rallied beneath his teasing. She wantedbadly to reach over and kiss him but didn't dare under the circ.u.mstances.

"What are they going to do with you?"

Jim glanced over at Breckenridge. "After they make a cast for this leg ofmine, they're taking me to the brig."

"No!" It was an animal-like cry. Alex whirled around and pinned Breckenridgewith a pleading look.

"How can they do that, Lieutenant? Jim saved my life! Doesn't that count foranything?"

Matt walked over to where she stood. "I'm doing everything I can to help him,Miss Vance," he a.s.sured her.

"But," she whispered distractedly, "his leg."

"If he walked in here under his own power, the major figures he can walk overto the brig and stay there instead of here at the hospital," Breckenridge saidunhappily. "I'm sorry."

Alex saw the genuine regret in the officer's eyes. She turned back to Jim, hergrip on his hand tight. "I'm going to help you, Jim. I swear I will."

"Listen to me, gal, no one can help me now. The best thing you can do is boardthe next freedom bird out of here and go Stateside. Go back to the real worldand forget about me." It hurt to say those words, especially when he didn'tmean them. The stubbornness he saw in Alex's face told him she wasn't going tolisten anyway.

"No! The way they're treating you-treating this whole situation-is inhumane! Iwon't stand for it, Jim."

Reaching up, desperate now, Jim placed his hands lightly on her smallshoulders. "Listen to me, Alex. The corps deals with men such as myself in itsown way. There's no use trying to defend me. It won't work."

Tears glimmered in her eyes. "Like h.e.l.l it won't," she quavered unsteadily."I'm not giving up on you, Jim. You may have given up on yourself, but Ihaven't!"

Desperation fueled his unraveling feelings. "Alex, go home! Forget about me,about what happened here in Nam!"

Alex pulled out of his grasp, breathing raggedly. Glaring at the lieutenantand then back at him, she rasped, "You don't forsake the one you love, JimMcKenzie! You're stuck with me! I'm not going to abandon you!" She whirledaway, walked toward the double swinging doors and disappeared through them.

Jim glanced over at his skipper. "Can't you convince her, sir?"

Breckenridge shrugged and came over. In a low voice, he ordered the brigguards to wait outside. When they were alone, he asked, "Is it true? You twolove each other?"

Hanging his head, Jim worked to stop the feelings he wanted so desperately toown and, more importantly, to share with Alex. The whole situation wasimpossible. "Sir, I do love her. I don't know when or how it happened, it justdid." Raising his head, he held the officer's saddened eyes. "You know as wellas I do that it won't work. They're gonna throw me in prison. It doesn'tmatter what my story is, the corps is going to punish me. She's fallen in lovewith the wrong person. Do you understand that, Skipper? I've gotta stop herfrom ruining her life by loving me."

Breckenridge nodded and stepped aside as the doctor, dressed in a green topand pants, swung through the doors with X rays in hand. "I understand, Jim.First things first. Let's get this leg of yours in a cast."

Alex finished dressing in a newly purchased pair of white cotton slacks and apale gold blouse. A private tent had been loaned to her while she remained atthe base. Since seeing Jim the other day, Alex had taken things into her ownhands. Luckily, she'd left her purse and other valuables behind in Da Nangbefore climbing onto that fateful helicopter flight. She had money to remainin Vietnam for some time.

Her father was in Saigon, conferring, she supposed, with the military leaderson political issues. Alex had left her address and phone number with his hotelin case he wanted to get hold of her. Until then, she was moving ahead withher plans. She opened the tent door.

"Miss Vance?"

"Hi, Lieutenant Breckenridge." Alex stepped aside and smiled. "Please, comein."

Breckenridge took off his utility cap and halted just inside the door. Hesmiled tiredly. "This place looks a lot better than the hospital. Glad theywere able to put you up here."

Shutting the door, Alex motioned the recon marine to sit down on a metalfolding chair. "It is," she agreed.

Matt sat opposite her. "Jim's been back two days now, and I've got to tellyou, all h.e.l.l's starting to break loose."

Alex halted and stared down at the officer. "Because I gave the U.S. reportersmy story of how Jim saved my life?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"If it will help Jim, I'll continue to give interviews to bring attention tohis case, Lieutenant."

"I think it's helping already. At least CID has dropped the desertion chargesagainst him. That was the worse of the two charges-the one that could put himbefore a firing squad."

Relief made her dizzy, and Alex whispered, "Oh, thank G.o.d." She saw thehappiness in the officer's eyes, too. "I suppose they want me to shut up anddisappear so they can get on with trying to hang Jim on insubordinationcharges, then."

Moving the utility cap slowly through his scarred, callused fingers,Breckenridge watched as she paced back and forth. "They'd probably breatheeasier, Miss Vance-"

"Call me Alex, please." She halted and tried to smile but failed. "I'm so gladyou're on Jim's side, Lieutenant."

He nodded. "Alex, Jim asked me to come over here and talk some sense intoyou-his words, not mine."

Her heart began pounding painfully and she sat down on the cot.

"McKenzie and I both know he's going to be in for a rough ride for refusing topick up a rifle. The corps will hang him on that, even if they can't make thedesertion charges stick. Jim's worried about you, what this press might dobecause your father's a congressman."

Alex touched her aching brow. "It's just like him to be worried for me and notfor himself." She glanced up at Matt. "That's why I love him. He's honest andsincere-not like so many other guys I've met."

"Yes," Breckenridge agreed, "McKenzie's all of that. Look, he wants you to get on with your life and forget him."

"How can I?"

Breckenridge shrugged. "I don't know. I can see you love him. But..."

"What?"

"You only knew each other for seven days under some very tryingcirc.u.mstances."

"Love doesn't have a time limit," Alex snapped back, getting up and startingto pace again. "Are those his words or your observation?"

"Mine," the officer admitted unhappily.

Alex stopped and stood tensely before the marine lieutenant. "Nothing you cansay will make me change my mind. I'm going to keep giving interviews to anynews reporter who wants the story of Jim's bravery. If not for him, I'd bedead. That's what the Marine Corps is so conveniently overlooking."

"They aren't overlooking it, Alex. What they are focusing in on is the factthat if they don't slap McKenzie with a stiff penalty for refusing ordersunder fire, other marines might get the same idea."

She shook her head. "Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad idea. War is no placefor anyone, Lieutenant."

"I can't disagree," he whispered.

"So what I'm hearing is that Jim's a scapegoat? A sacrificial lamb because hestood up for his own values and morals?"

"Yes," Breckenridge said wearily. "The court-martial board is conveningtomorrow morning, Alex. It's closed to all but key military personnel."

"Don't they want me as a witness?"

He shook his head.

Alex shut her eyes. "My G.o.d, how did the military get such blanket authority?This goes beyond our const.i.tutional laws."

Breckenridge got up and walked over to her. He laid his hand on her shoulder."If it makes you feel any better, the newspaper articles here in country andback in the States will probably force the convening board officers to giveJim a much lighter sentence than Captain Johnson wanted."

Tears swam in Alex's eyes as she looked up at Breckenridge. She realized hewas suffering no less for Jim than she was. "What are you trying to say? Thathis sentence and where they're going to send him have already beendetermined?"

"I believe," Matt said with an effort, "they'll probably reduce him to privateand give him six months in Long Binh jail. It's located near Saigon. I don'tthink anyone wants Jim Stateside where peace demonstrators can march in hisbehalf. If I can read between the lines of the colonel in charge, he wants tosweep this whole thing under the rug and hope it goes away. By keeping Jim incountry, under guard where no one from the media can reach him, they figurethe real world will eventually forget him."

Alex wavered. She felt the officer grip her shoulder, as if to support herafter delivering the news. Alex drew in a ragged breath. "I don't have thekind of money it would take to hire a civilian lawyer back in the States tohelp. I wished I did, but Father and I don't get along very well. He pays onlymy nursing school tuition. I work two part-time jobs to cover my rent andliving expenses."

"Alex, you've done what you can. When this court-martial comes up for review,I believe the decision against Jim will be overturned. Maybe you weren't awareof the required review process, but it's Jim's best chance at vindication. Thelocal command is too close to the fighting, and Captain Johnson'sembellishment of the refusal under fire conditions is hurting Jim's chance ata fair hearing. No lawyer is going to be able to help him right now. Look, Jimwants you to go back home." Matt took an envelope from the pocket of hisutilities. "I managed to smuggle in paper and a pen to him. He wanted to writeyou. You won't be able to see him again."

Alex felt as if her heart was breaking. A sob escaped her. "I won't be able tosee him?"

"No...I'm sorry. Once they sentence Jim, they'll put him in leg irons and flyhim down to Long Binh."

Anger and grief surged through her. "H-how can you handle this so calmly?"

"Because I'm resolved to the fact that this is one case that can be won more easily on appeal than in the present kangaroo-court mentality," Breckenridgetold her grimly.

"Aren't you upset over the unfairness of it?"

"Of course. I have contacted some people who will be able to a.s.sist me in theappeal hearing for Jim."

Alex took the letter. The pages were smudged with perspiration and dust. Whatkind of conditions were there at the brig? Alex was afraid to ask in the wakeof all the bad news.

"I think Jim's wrong about one thing," Breckenridge murmured. "He believesyour love for him is a pa.s.sing thing, created out of the trauma you survivedin the jungle." Matt turned the envelope over. "I took the liberty of findingout the mailing address for Long Binh-just in case you want to stay in touch."

Tears streamed down Alex's cheeks. Pressing her hand against her lips, shenodded. "Th-thank you, Lieutenant. You're a good man. Jim is lucky to have youduring all this."

The officer settled his cap back on his head. "No," he whispered, "Jim islucky to have you. As it stands, the corps is going to treat him like a modelprisoner, knowing that you're out there monitoring his whereabouts, his stateof mind and health."

"D-do you think they'll allow Jim to get my letters?"

With a shrug, Matt said, "I don't know. By law, they have to let him getmail."

"What if I don't get answers? How will I know if he's receiving my mail atall, or if he's just refusing to answer it?"

Matt shook his head unhappily. "There's no way to know. Look, I'll be seeingJim. I'm one of the few people who can get to him with the tight security overthis whole deal. Maybe you'd like to read his letter and write one yourself. Ican at least carry a letter from you back to him."

Dashing away the tears, Alex moved to the small desk. "Yes, I'll do that.Thanks, Matt."