Shikamaru was in Kakashis office.The Sixth Hokage was surrounded by mountains of documents as always, his hand hurriedly signing papers as if it was just waiting for the time it could go slack with exhaustion.

The window across the room had been thrown open, and you could see the streets of Konoha outside. The city seemed to glow under the sunshine of the bright morning, all wrapped up in a gentle, peaceful atmosphere.

Ive made you wait. Kakashi said as he straightened out a sheaf of papers on his desk. What business do you have with me today?

The Country of Silence.

Ah, that

Shikamaru still hadnt finished his report about the Unions meeting the other day. There wasnt anything particularly special to report, so hed left it alone.

Everythings the same as ever at the Union. Its made up of a collection of capable people, theres nothing to worry about.

Youre one of those capable people too.

Was he really? Was he really someone who was fit to represent Konoha?

Do you really intend to go? Kakashi asked.

Yes.

Kakashi let out a great sigh at his answer.

Is it really necessary for you to go?

Sais been captured. Our village has lost a large number of shinobi, both those who went missing during the war and those who ended up disappearing after. Whether they really left the village of their own free will, or ended up being captured by Gengo is something that we have to verify.

Youre really determined, huh.

Shikamaru silently nodded.

Kakashi closed his eyes and shook his head. He looked at Shikamaru again.

I get it. I wont say anything more. Who are you thinking of taking? Youre not planning on going all by yourself, right?

Could you spare me two people from Anbu?

Huh Kakashi was cradling his chin in one hand, his elbow resting against his desk. There was a serious look in his eyes. Wouldnt Ino and Chouji do?

The InoShikaChou combination can be used for sneak attacks, however I dont think it fits the requirements for this mission.

Because its assassination, right?

Furthermore, infiltration is a great part of this mission. I want people who can hide chakra.

Hmm

Kakashi closed his eyes and thought. He was taking Shikamarus proposal and comparing it to all the other options inside his head.

The one who deals the killing blow wont be you, right?

I intend to use my jutsu to bind the target.

Then youll need someone for the killing blow. Kakashi concluded ahead of any explanation. He understood what Shikamaru was thinking.

Two Anbu

One that could manipulate chakra, and conceal their presence. Another that held a jutsu which could deliver the killing blow.

I have suitable people. Kakashi said.

Thank you.

Ill make the arrangements.

You dont have anything to tell me about my other duties? Shikamaru asked.

None of your other duties are more urgent than this matter. Kakashi said, and you could feel in that moment that he really was the Hokage.

He calmly assessed the relative importance of various matters, and made quick, firm decisions on which were to be carried out. It was because he was capable like this that shinobi could work under him without worry, and give their all for the village. Shikamaru thought they wouldnt be able to function without him.

He didnt have any thoughts like I want to be Hokage. But, it wouldve been a lie to say he didnt feel the slightest bit motivated to grow. In front of a man like Kakashi, Shikamaru was still young and inexperienced, unable to compare to him, and it felt frustrating.

Ill tell the two I have in mind to return quickly. You can wait a little longer, right?

Please do it as quickly as possible.

I get it. Kakashi smiled under his mask and stood up. He turned his back to Shikamaru to gaze out the open window.

You dont have to burden yourself so much, you know. Kakashi murmured.

Shikamaru didnt answer.

Burdening himself

Perhaps he was.

In a way even he himself couldnt understand, Shikamaru had somehow ended up carrying many, many burdens.

Even though he found things bothersome, hed somehow ended up behaving unlike himself, and carrying so many things. Even though all these burdens were getting far too heavy for him to bear, he couldnt throw any of them away, either.

Shikamaru was scared to.

He got the feeling that he could end up throwing everything away, and losing himself in the process. Hed started out as someone who found everything bothersome. If he put down all his responsibilities and burdens for just one moment, then wasnt it highly possible that he wouldnt ever pick them back up?

And when that happened, then wouldnt it be the case that nobody would need him anymore?

The thought alone was unbearably frightening.

Im going to tell you what I really think now. Kakashi lifted his left hand into the air, letting tiny bolts of lightning crackle in and out of existence. Right now, I really want to abandon all my duties as the Hokage and go to the Country of Silence.

Shikamaru could clearly hear the screaming frustration of Kakashis heart: how the man wanted to abandon everything to go and kill Gengo with his own two hands.

But the responsibilities of a Hokages position couldnt be abandoned so easily.

Honestly, Kakashi said, I think its inexcusable of me to burden you with this.

Naruto and me, and every other one of our peers, weve already all attained positions with burdens and responsibilities. Theres no need for you to carry them all by yourself.

Is that so

The lightning in Kakashis left hand melted away into nothing.

Shikamaru. Kakashi looked over his shoulder at the Nara. I wonder what it means to be an adult, sometimes.

Please dont look to me for the answer to that. Shikamaru sighed.

Ill come back again. Shikamaru said to the gravestone. Turning away, his eyes caught on the name engraved into the stone: Nara Shikaku.

Naturally, hed wanted to visit his fathers grave after his meeting with Kakashi ended.

What did it mean to be an adult? It felt like he could find the answer to Kakashis question here, if anywhere.

In the Fourth Shinobi World War, his father had been with the Five Kage at the alliances headquarters. After the Five Kage had gone to the frontline of the battle due to the severity of the fight, Inos father and Shikamarus father had taken charge of giving directions to the whole army.

Then, Obito had resurrected the Ten Tails and made it send its explosive Tailed Beast Balls in order to cause chaos amidst the Unions army. As the killing blow had approached, Shikakus last moments were spent thinking and conveying further strategies for the army.

He had been a Shinobi to the very end.

No

The truth was that in his very last moments, Shikaku had been a father. Although the only one who knew that was Shikamaru, as his son.

What was it to be an adult?

Shikamaru thought about that for a while.

Saying goodbye to his fathers grave, Shikamarus feet took him to the next person he wanted to visit.

His teachers grave.

Sarutobi Asuma

He was a man who had turned down the path of an elite that hed been entitled to as the Third Hokages flesh and blood, and instead constantly stayed on the frontlines.

After Shikamaru graduated from the Academy, it was under Asumas care that hed been raised into the shinobi he was today. Along with Ino and his best friend Chouji, the three of them had constantly been chasing Asumas back, struggling through missions.

Asuma, whod gone through any crisis with a cigarette in his mouth and his same easy going attitude, had been everything Shikamaru aspired to be.

And yet, that Asuma could no longer be found in this world.

Hed died, in a battle against the Akatsuki group who had been making schemes to take over the Earth.

Hed died for the sake of letting Shikamaru live

Asuma had understood they had no chance of winning against the inhuman abilities of the Akatsuki member they had been faced against, and died while risking his life to protect Shikamaru and his other comrades.

He, too, had spent his last moments thinking of others.

Shikamaru had yet to find anything he would sacrifice himself to protect.

Of course, the people of his village and all his comrades were extremely precious to him. But it felt like those feelings were different from the extent of fierce protection that his father and Asuma had displayed.

Perhaps that meant that Shikamaru still hadnt become an adult.

He thought that in the first place that ambiguous word adult referred to a child whod at some point simply become trapped in their own body.

In that case, even Kakashi was a child at heart.

But Kakashi already had something hed trade his life to protect.

For a Hokage, every person in the village is his child. Those were the words of Asumas father, the Third Hokage Hiruzen.

Maybe when Kakashi chose to become Hokage, hed become an adult.

He wasnt sure about anything anymore

Shika niichan!

Shikamaru was roused out of his pensive thoughts by the sound of that carefree voice reaching his ears.

A plump toddler was tottering towards him. Swaying left and right with clumsy little feet, she made her way towards him step by step.

Mirai. Shikamaru called her name, his voice naturally turning fond and cheerful. His tense features softened, and his mouth moved to turn into a smile.

Gyaa! Mirai finally came to where he stood, and clung onto his legs with her short little arms. Shika niichan!

The toddler looked up at him with dazzling bright eyes, her tiny face splitting into a wide grin. The toddlers smile felt like the sun, and Shikamaru could feel his frozen over heart thawing with its warmth.

Its been a while, Shikamaru.

Kurenai-sensei. Shikamaru greeted the dark haired woman that was Mirais mother.

Im not a sensei anymore, so you can stop calling me that. She said, laughing.

Sarutobi Kurenai

Originally, she was a jounin leader along with Kakashi and Asuma, in charge of a team made of Shikamarus other classmates. But now she was a mother who had devoted all her time to parenting.

You came to visit Asumas grave? She asked.

Yeah.

And your fathers grave?

Ive just come from visiting him.

Listening to their conversation and still clinging onto Shikamarus leg, Mirai smiled and lifted her head.

Shika niichan! Met Papa!

Although the toddler could only manage halting sentences, she was bursting with the need to convey everything she could. Looking down at Mirai, Shikamarus heart warmed up.

To become this childs teacher

It was a promise hed made to both Asuma and Kurenai.

I see, you came to see your Papa, huh? Shikamaru crouched down so he could speak to her eye to eye.

Mirai gave a delighted nod at being understood.

Wow, how great of you, Mirai. Shikamaru said, gently patting her head. The soft feel of the toddlers still downy hair seemed to travel along his arm and all the way to his heart, turning into a calming breeze that soothed his insides.

Grow up soon, okay?

Mm.

You really love your Shikamaru niichan, huh Mirai? Kurenai said.

Mirai nodded so hard she almost pitched herself forwards, and Shikamaru reached out to catch her with both hands.

For the sake of this child, he really couldnt go and die just yet

Right!

Mirai babbled the word with such timing, it almost felt like shed read right into his heart.

Well, thanks for liking me.

Shikamaru picked up Mirai and lifted her into the air. As the two year old shrieked with delighted laughter, Shikamaru thought to himself one more time, much stronger than before:

I absolutely cannot die.