I wanted that. A mother like her-someone who looked at me like I was the only thing that mattered.

I hadn't known what that felt like until I'd met him. Even when he hadn't said the words, I had known. Some things can be felt without having to hear the words "I love you." He treasured me and never made me feel cheap.

Still staring at the photo, I jumped when I heard his raspy morning voice.

"Angel."

"Jesus," I said, flinching and putting my hand over my heart. "You scared the h.e.l.l out of me."

I laughed at how silly I had been. Who else would have called me that but him? I hadn't heard him walk in, so I needed to learn the sounds of the house. Every place has them-the small squeaks and creaks that make you feel at home instead of on edge.

I stared back at the photo, feeling my cheeks heat from embarra.s.sment. He wrapped his arms around me, the mint of the toothpaste ticking my nose as his warm breath skimmed my neck.

"Whatcha doin' down here alone?"

"I didn't want to wake you up. I just thought I'd make us some coffee," I lied. I was nosy. Wanting to see the house and get to know the man by seeing what he had surrounded himself with.

As he squeezed me, his soft laugh vibrated against my ear. "I'll make us some. I think Izzy stocked the pantry."

"Izzy is-" I remembered her name that he whispered in his sleep.

"She's my sister, babe. Don't worry. There's no one but you in my life. Unless you count my extremely nosy and pushy family."

I sagged against him, a feeling of relief washing over me. "Is this your mom?" I asked, pointing at the photo I had been admiring.

"Yeah. It's my favorite childhood photo with her. I can't wait to see her."

"I can see how much she loves you. She has to be excited to see you." I stroked his arm, feeling the hairs move under my fingertips.

"She doesn't know I'm here. I wanted to surprise her." He slid his hands to my waist, turning me in his grasp.

"Why would you do that to her? She's probably worried sick." I rested my cheek against his exposed chest, nestling my face between his pecs. I could hear his heart thumping inside.

"If she knew I was coming home, there would be a house full of people. I want to spend time with my parents and my siblings. The others can wait. My mom loves to throw a party. You'll see."

"She's going to have a heart attack when you walk through the door."

"Maybe. Want to come find out?"

I bit my lip, not wanting to hurt his feelings but not ready to do the entire family thing just yet. "Not today, baby. Give me a couple of days and I promise I'll go with you." I brushed his back with my fingertips, feeling his body quake in my arms.

"Okay," he said before kissing the top of my head.

"I want this day to be about you. There's plenty of time for them to get to know me." I hugged him, wanting to never let go.

"Will you be okay here today by yourself for a while?" he asked, holding me by the shoulders and looking down at me.

"I will," I said with a smile. "I'm going to snoop through your s.h.i.t while you're gone. I figure that will take a couple of hours, easy." I bit my lip to hide my laughter.

"Don't be too naughty. I'll have to spank you if you do."

"Thomas, you know I love when you're rough. I may be bad just so you give it to me good."

"Babe," he growled, his voice growing deeper. "I'm going to f.u.c.k you so hard later you won't be able to walk for a week."

"Promises, promises," I teased. "If I don't get coffee soon, I'm going to be real grumpy." I pouted, batting my eyelashes.

After he made a pot of coffee, he ran around the house, getting ready before saying goodbye and heading to see his family. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little jealous that someone missed him, but I told myself that Thomas missed me when we were apart. I wasn't alone anymore.

Chapter 13.

I stood outside the door. Cracking my neck, shaking my fingers at my side, I took a deep breath before I walked inside. My mom would lose her s.h.i.t. h.e.l.l, the entire family was about to lose it when I came through the door. I had to ready myself for the ear-piercing screams and blood-curdling shrieks of happiness that only the Gallos could deliver.

The house looked the same. Life had marched on without me. Sunday dinners had gone on as planned since I had been a child, whether I'd been in my chair or not. Nothing had changed but me. I was the wild card, the different one. My life had been forever altered through my actions undercover. Didn't matter if the s.h.i.t was justified or not-I was no longer normal. I had become a criminal like the others, just as guilty for my actions as they were. The only difference was I wore a badge and they wore a cut.

Without knocking, I opened the door and walked inside.

"h.e.l.lo." I didn't see her, but I'd know my mother's voice anywhere. It haunted me in my dreams and comforted me in my times of self-doubt.

"Ma!" I yelled, moving toward the kitchen, where I heard her voice coming from.

"Tommy?" I could hear the shock in the single word.

She flew out of the kitchen, jumping into my arms and kissing my face. "Baby! Oh my G.o.d. You're home!" she yelled in my ear, squeezing me so tightly that I could barely breathe.

"Ma," I repeated, trying to pull in a breath.

She drew back and stared at me. "Is it really you?"

I chuckled, taking in the changes in her appearance. Time had pa.s.sed, and my mother looked older than I remembered, with a few more lines around her eyes and cheeks. A majority of her stress had probably been caused by my absence. Then again, she had an entire family of people who would cause any normal woman to age early.

"It's me, Ma."

Releasing her legs from my body, she placed her feet on the floor but kept her arms wrapped around me. "You look different, Tommy." I smiled and didn't f.u.c.king dare say the same thing to her.

"Tommy!" my dad called out, walking into the foyer.

"Pop," I replied, holding out my hand, since my ma was still attached to my body, squeezing me.

"Maria, let the man go. You have to share him sometime," Pop said without moving from his spot.

"If I do, he may disappear." Her voice was m.u.f.fled, since her lips were against my skin.

Pop walked behind her, removing her arms from my body. Ma took a step back, blotting her eyes and wiping away the tears that had drifted down her cheeks.

"Son." Pop wrapped me into a giant bear hug.

My father, brothers, and James were the only men in my life I'd shown affection to. No one else ever got that from me. That s.h.i.t didn't leave this house. It was grounds to get your a.s.s kicked, and I didn't need an extra fight on my hands. Italian men didn't have an issue showing their love to one another.

"Hey, Pop," I whispered, holding on to him just as tightly.

The man had been my hero when I was growing up. He was larger than life and could make most men in the neighborhood quake. I'd wanted to be worthy of being his son when I grew up. I thought I'd accomplished that goal in his eyes, but inside, I knew the truth. I'd muddied the waters between good and evil.

Over his shoulder while still wrapped in his arms, I saw the entire Gallo crew as they filed into the foyer. Izzy popped out first, a giant smile forming on her face before James came up behind her and placed his arms around her waist. I guessed they were still going strong. Joey pushed James aside, knocking him and Izzy over a bit, and came straight for me. My brother didn't often show emotion, but I could the happiness on his face.

"So f.u.c.king good to see you, brother," he said, tapping my pop on the shoulder. "Mind sharing?"

"Your mother often says I'm greedy," Pop said, laughing before releasing his grip on me.

Izzy gagged. "For s.h.i.t's sake. You two give way too much information."

They laughed as my pop put his arm around her shoulder, and Joey held out his hand and smiled. When I placed my palm in his, he pulled me into a giant bear hug. Joey and I were most alike. We were so close in age that I swear my mother must have wasted no time in getting knocked up again.

"Joe, it's so f.u.c.king great to see you, man," I said, slapping him on the back.

Then a blonde walked into the foyer and leaned against the wall. A giant smile was plastered on her face as she stared at Joey and me. She was wearing a cute, flowery sundress that didn't do anything to hide her belly. She was definitely pregnant, and had to be Suzy, Joe's wife. He grabbed my arm, backing away, and turned to the blonde.

"Sugar, come here." He motioned to her to stand at his side, and she followed his command without protest. "This is Tommy."

She looked up at me, her large blue eyes twinkling. "Tommy," she repeated. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Don't believe a word of the bulls.h.i.t he fed you about me." I laughed, winking at her.

She blushed as her smile widened, and she winked back. "You're prettier than I thought you'd be."

Looking at my brother, I saw his stare go to Suzy and his hawk eyes bore into her, but she didn't care. "You're prettier than I thought you'd be too. Who knew Joe could get such a killer babe?"

She chuckled, bringing her hand up to cover her mouth.

"You two done?" Joe barked, and glanced between us.

"Just f.u.c.kin' with ya, man."**% She turned to him, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed him. "Oh, Joey, you know you're the most beautiful man in the world. He's your brother, and Gallos don't do ugly. I'm yours and yours alone. I have a mini-you growing inside my belly. Duh."

His face instantly softened and his body visibly relaxed. This girl was good. She knew exactly how to handle my brother. I didn't think I'd see the day when he would become p.u.s.s.y-whipped, but there she was in flowers, blond hair, and blue eyes. She was the boss, just like my mother.

"f.u.c.ker, get your a.s.s over here and kiss me!" Mike yelled out, pushing Suzy and Joey aside. He puckered his lips and held out his arms, and I couldn't stop myself from laughing. Motherf.u.c.ker was still a goofball.

"Only if you give me tongue," I teased, sticking out my tongue and wiggling it.

He gagged, holding up his hands and waving them. "I'm tapping out."

"Come here, ya big pansy a.s.s. I've missed you," I said, moving closer to him and wrapping my arms around him.

This was more man love than I had experienced in a long time. This was my family-all gushy and overemotional-and I'd missed every moment of it while I'd been away.

Mike hadn't changed much, except that he looked happier and more relaxed. Maybe he wasn't spending his life in a gym, taking out his aggression and bulls.h.i.t on a punching bag or Rob.

"It's good to see you, Tommy," he said, holding my neck in one hand and slapping me on the back with the other.

"You too, Mikey. You too. Where's the little lady?" I asked, looking around the room as Mike let go of me.

"Mia!" Mike yelled, and glanced around the room. "She picked the worst time to use the restroom. I swear women are-"

"Women are what?" she hissed as she walked into the foyer.

She was stunning. Her long brown waves trickled down her shoulder and framed her b.r.e.a.s.t.s. She was tall and voluptuous, and I was impressed with my brother's catch. Who knew a beefhead could bag a doctor who looked like her?

"Mia," I said, holding out my hand to her.

"d.a.m.n," she said, placing her hand in mine. "Another s.e.xy Gallo man." She laughed, tossing her head back as her hair followed suit.

"What?" I asked, crinkling my eye and shaking my head.

"Devilishly good looks. Are you as c.o.c.ky as the others?" she asked, smirking.

"Nah. They're the p.r.i.c.ks. I'm a complete gentleman," I said as I brought her hand to my mouth, kissing her soft skin.

"Mia, don't listen to that bulls.h.i.t. He's as bad as the rest. Gimme a kiss, brother." Izzy moved Mia away from me and wrapped her arms around my body. She was tiny, so her head didn't reach my shoulders. Resting her head in my chest, she squeezed me tightly and rocked back and forth. "I'm so happy you're home."

"Are you here to stay, son?" Pop asked, still holding my ma.

"Yeah, Pop. I'm not going anywhere."

"Thank Christ," Ma mumbled, looking at the ceiling and cupping her hands in prayer-always the good Catholic girl.

"This calls for a celebration!" Pop hollered, fist pumping the air.

"Mike, go grab the good stuff from the cellar," Ma said, shooing him with her hands.

"Why do I always have to do the s.h.i.t work?" he grumbled, giving me the stink eye.

I shrugged, laughing as I looked around. Someone was missing. "Where's Anthony?"

"Yo," a voice called out from the family room.

I pushed through the crowd and entered the room his voice had come from. "Yo, douchebag. You don't even get up to say h.e.l.lo?" I looked down at him, my hands on my hips as I blocked his view of the television.

"I figured you'd find me when everyone else was done pawing at you."

This was exactly how my brother was and had always been. He was a c.o.c.ky a.s.shole who didn't believe in public displays of affection. Underneath, he was as gushy as the others, but he very rarely let that side show. Only when he was extremely intoxicated did he get all "I love you, man" and let his Norah Jones side show.

"You better get your lazy a.s.s up and hug me." I kicked his feet, glaring at him.