"Oh, I didn't see this. Look what she wrote." She handed the card to Spencer.

Elena had scribbled a few words of encouragement and a warning: Hang in there, Spence - we're working on it. No contact is best for now.

"I knew it! She's already on it. What'd I tell you?"

"I can see why you trust her. There's something about her that gives off confidence and authority. And she sure did seem glad to hear from you." Ruth resumed her shoulder massage.

"How could you tell?"

"I don't know exactly. It was like her shoulders relaxed and her voice got softer."

Spencer chuckled. "I can't believe you picked up on that. I've seen it before too, just like you're describing. That's when I first realized that her tough girl stuff was an act."

"I don't think it has anything to do with not being tough. I think she just cares for you, and she's probably been pretty frantic herself about all of this." In her voice was a trace of admonition. It was clear that the agent's feelings for Spencer were genuine, and if Ruth had to bet, she'd say they went beyond the friendship Spencer described.

"I'm sure she has. I'm really lucky to have her on my side. And you can see now why I wanted you to put all this other stuff in her hands. If there's a way to fix things, she'll find it."

After meeting Elena for herself, Ruth found herself nursing a glimmer of hope after all. "Even if she can't, I do trust her now not to turn me in."

Unexpectedly, Spencer reached up and covered a hand that worked her shoulder. "Listen Ruth, no matter what happens, I really appreciate what you did today."

She liked the familiarity of Spencer's hand on hers. "You know, you've got to stop calling me that. You're going to confuse my daughter, and Viv's going to start asking questions."

"Sorry, but you're just not a Karen," Spencer said sheepishly. "And Jessie's not a Megan, either."

"I know, but if Elena can't help us on this, we have to be Karen and Megan Oliver from now on...Dolly."

"That was low."

Ruth grinned at the tall woman's pout. With no warning at all, the most peculiar feeling came over her and she found herself fighting the urge to lean down and kiss Spencer Rollins full on the lips. Where the hell had that come from?

Ruth laid awake that night thinking about what had come over her earlier. Spencer was lying beside her, the slow, deep breaths a sure sign that she was asleep. Ruth had never been drawn to a woman before, not emotionally and certainly not sexually. All of her sexual urges up to this point had been for men. One man, actually, and that was Skip. But she'd never really been attracted at all to Skip when it came to emotions. In the four years they'd spent together, they hadn't really connected at all.

What she felt for Spencer was such a contrast to all of that. It was definitely emotional; and it wasn't like any of her other friendships. When her friends were sad or happy, she could easily share that with them; but with Spencer, she did more than share, and none of it was conscious. When this woman beside her felt something, she felt it too. It didn't matter if it was anxiety, relief, frustration, or hope. Ruth took it on, and in her mind, it drew them closer. Whether Spencer felt that way or not was anybody's guess, but she'd never given off any kind of warning for Ruth to keep her distance.

Now, the sexual thing...well, that was new. If she were honest with herself, she'd have to admit that she'd gotten her very first flicker of that the moment Spencer told her she was gay. But was it really sexual? The urge to kiss someone like she'd wanted to do earlier was definitely tied to her libido, which hadn't been sparked in almost three years. That was when she first learned that Skip was getting his sexual needs met elsewhere.

Whatever it was that was jolting her now, it was kind of exciting to think about. And when she considered what the enigmatic woman had said jokingly about her willingness to share a bed, she wondered if maybe Spencer felt the same little spark.

On the other hand, maybe all of these strange feelings were just stress and anxiety, and concern for Spencer's safety. After all, the programmer had been practically at death's door just a week ago, and today's meeting with Elena had brought all of that danger to the forefront of her thoughts again.

Or maybe she was just analyzing everything to death and she should just go to sleep.

Spencer awoke to the strangest feeling - pain. In the night, Ruth had migrated across the center of the bed to rest her hand and cheek on her injured shoulder. The wound was over a week old and had been feeling better for the most part, but the pressure was definitely unpleasant.

Carefully, she pulled away, hoping not to wake her companion. Ruth would probably be mortified to find herself sleeping like this, she thought with a chuckle. But Spencer had to admit, it was kind of nice to get a cuddle from her pretty friend, even if it was unintentional.

As soon as she extricated her arm, Ruth rolled over, pressing her backside against Spencer. That was impossible to resist, and with little thought at all, the taller woman turned on her side, wrapped her arm around the small body and fell right back to sleep.

CHAPTER 21.

JUST LIKE THE Sunday before, the occupants of the trailer were awakened by a robust pounding on the front door.

"Pancakes and bacon in ten minutes!" Viv shouted.

Jessie rushed into the back bedroom to find her mother and Spencer untangling awkwardly. "Viv is making pancakes again!"

"So we heard," Ruth answered sleepily. "You better go pick out something to wear, don't you think?"

The child happily raced back to her room to get dressed as the grownups pulled themselves from the bed.

"Gee, what shall I wear today?" Spencer teased, picking up her last clean t-shirt and yesterday's jeans.

Ruth grabbed her own clothes and disappeared into the bathroom, embarrassed by just the thought of dressing in the same room with Spencer. Why that bothered her so much, she didn't know, but all of a sudden it was like they were girlfriends or something. She had awakened just before dawn to find the older woman wrapped completely around her, a long leg draped between her own. She'd had no inclination at all to pull away. Lying with Spencer like that just seemed perfectly normal.

Right on time, the threesome walked through the back door at Viv's, Jessie making a beeline to see the puppies. Willy was getting quite a belly, and hadn't yet shown any interest in playing. Viv had said that Labs were like that for the first few weeks, but that they spent the rest of their lives making up for it.

"It's supposed to be pretty today, probably one of the last nice days before it turns cold for good." Viv had laid out a huge breakfast, and everyone was digging in. "I was thinking a picnic might be a good idea."

"A picnic!" Jessie exclaimed. She and her mommy had gone on picnics a lot when they only saw each other on the weekends.

"Yes, a picnic," Viv went on. "It's kind of chilly, so there won't be a big crowd out there."

Spencer shook her head. "I don't think I should go, but you guys ought to. It would be fun."

"Why can't you go?" Jessie demanded.

"Because I don't want people to see me," Spencer answered simply, not realizing the questions that would raise.

"Why not?"

Ruth nervously kicked the brunette under the table. It wouldn't be good to get into a hiding discussion around Viv. Jessie would let the cat out of the bag for sure.

"Because I'm supposed to be at work. But I'm not because I'm...."

"Lazy!"

"That's right."

Viv left the kitchen and returned, tossing a cap and sunglasses on the table beside her tall guest. "You know, I was thinking we could drive down I-66 in the Jeep to Front Royal and then take Skyline Drive south until we found a nice place to stop. There are a lot of pretty lakes out there with picnic tables and trails."

"I wanna go!" Jessie shouted. "Please!"

Even Ruth was a little anxious about being seen, but she knew she had to get past that; the whole reason for running away was so they could have a new life, and they shouldn't have to live it in hiding.

"Okay, I'll go too," Spencer announced, slipping on the glasses and hat.

That sealed it for Ruth. They were going on a picnic.

Spencer sat in the back seat of the Jeep Cherokee with Jessie, the two of them poking each other and laughing until Ruth threatened to have Viv pull over and put them both out. The drive to Front Royal was otherwise dull and uneventful, but things perked up when they reached the parkway. Even with the trees already bare, the lakes and woods were beautiful.

"I haven't been over here in ten or twelve years," Viv said.

"Tell us about the last time," Ruth prodded.

The landlady blew out a deep breath. "It was with Sheila. That's my daughter. We used to come out here when she and Robby were little. Robby's my son. He lives in Richmond now. Last I heard, Sheila was in Kentucky or Ohio or someplace."

"You don't see her anymore?" For Ruth, estrangement from parents was familiar territory.

"I guess it's more like she doesn't see me. I brought her out here for a drive because we'd always had a good time here. I wanted to have a good time with her for a change. We were always fighting about one thing or another." The landlady sniffed and blinked back the tears that threatened to fall.

"So where did you two leave things, Viv?" Spencer asked softly from the back seat.

"We got along up until the day she left, but both of us were holding back, trying not to go off on each other. Then that last day, all...heck broke loose, and she walked out telling me she wasn't coming back." Viv tried to gather herself; she was driving, after all. "And she hasn't."

"I'm so sorry." Ruth put her hand on the woman's shoulder.

"I'm not," she sighed. "Well, I'm not sorry she hasn't come back like that. I am sorry that she stopped being that little girl who liked picnics, and dogs, and her family. The woman she grew up to be liked drinking and drugs, and any man she could get to pay for it."

The foursome rode along quietly for several miles, Jessie pointing out cows and horses as they came into view.

"What about Robby? Do you see a lot of your son?" Spencer was looking for a way to get the conversation back on something more upbeat.

"He comes up every two or three months. He works maintenance at the Capitol. It's a good job for him. He didn't get blessed with a lot in the sense department, but he works hard and he's always checking in."

"Does he have family?"

"He got married about three years ago to an older woman. She's good for him. But I don't think they're planning on having children."

"You never know," Ruth offered.

"No, I've given up on having any grandkids. You better watch out, though. I'll spoil that one back there if you let me." Viv nodded her head in the direction of the four-year-old in the back seat.

Ruth was so touched by the statement that her own eyes suddenly filled with tears. "That'll mean a lot to her, Viv. And to me, too."

"Somebody's already spoiled her," Spencer piped up. "She's so rotten she smells."

"I do not."

"Do too."

"You're lazy."

After driving an hour on the parkway, Viv pulled off at Otter Lake, where a short walk led them to a picnic table near the water. No one was hungry, but the novelty of eating outside was too exciting for Jessie to put off, so they all had an early lunch.

"Can I go feed the ducks with Viv?" the child asked when she'd finished her chips.

Ruth didn't answer, just cocked her head and raised her eyebrows in question.

"May I go feed the ducks with Viv?" she clarified.

"Yes, you may. That was very good that you remembered."

She hadn't remembered, but Spencer had been mouthing the words behind her mother and that reminded her of what to do. The little girl crawled off the bench and grabbed her bread scraps. Viv had brought a whole extra loaf of bread.

"How about you? You want to see where that trail goes?" Spencer invited.

"Sure." Ruth walked over and told her landlady where they were going, asking if she'd mind watching Megan. Viv just waved her away.

"I really like Viv a lot, don't you?" Spencer started.

"She's great. Just look at her with Jessie. She's so patient and sweet. It's hard to imagine her daughter turned out so badly."

"Well, somewhere along the way, Sheila made the wrong choices."

That comment hit home for the blonde, and she began to shake her head. "I sure wish I could go back and choose over."

"Don't be so hard on yourself. Look at that." Spencer turned and looked back through the bare trees at the four-year-old gleefully feeding the ducks. "That was a good choice."

"Jessie's probably the only thing I did right."

"It's going to work out, Ruth," Spencer assured, draping her arm around the smaller woman's shoulder for a quick hug. Like Viv, she had hoped for a day when they could all set their problems aside and have fun. But some problems were too big to outrun, she guessed.

"So what about you? Did you ever do anything that made your parents pull their hair out?"

Spencer warmed all over as Ruth answered the hug by wrapping her arm around her waist. Something was going on here; she wasn't sure what it was but it felt very nice.

"Probably the worst thing I ever did was to pick State over Duke or Carolina," Spencer answered with a chuckle.

"Why was that such a big deal?"

"My father taught statistics at Carolina, and my mother was on the faculty at Duke's med school. They went back and forth for years about where I'd go, and I blew both of them off."

"So is that really the worst thing you ever did?"

"Mmmm, probably. I was a good kid, and we were pretty close. I liked my parents. We did a lot of things together."

"How'd they handle you being gay?"

"They were okay. College professors tend to be more liberal than most, I think. They both liked Elena a lot. Even after we split up, she'd still come home with me for long weekends at the lake and Mom would trash her for letting me get away. Elena always threatened to pull her taxes."

"That's too funny! It's all just so foreign to me. I can't even imagine having a good time with my family," Ruth said sadly.