I DO:.

Powerful two-letter word that actually means, 'I will love you, take care of you, serve you, protect you for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for as long as we both shall live.'

Before I joined my parents, I looked at Ryder and said, "Thank you, Ryder. You've been very kind to all of us. I guess this is the last, huh? I'll call my parents after a week to tell them that it's over. Don't worry. I'll make sure nobody blames you. I'll tell them that I want to stay single for a while. To... date around..."

"Do you?" He asked soberly.

I raised a brow. "Do I what?"

"Want to date around?" He asked.

I laughed... to cover up the pain that I feel inside... and to hide the truth behind the lie that I'm about to say.

"It's been a while, hasn't it?" I turned away because I couldn't bear to lie to him anymore. I joined my family for the pictures. Ryder took a picture with us too.

I tried to laugh, dance and chat with as much of my relatives as I can. I was avoiding Ryder. I didn't know what to say to him. More than anything, I don't want to feel any more pain. I have gone from one major heartbreak to a love unrequited in less than one year.

In truth, when he asked me if I really wanted to date around, what I really wanted to tell him was... No. I just want to date you... for real.

The evening wore on. I haven't spoken another word to Ryder again. I managed to evade him. We didn't even dance a song.

It was time to go. Most of my relatives have gone home. I said my goodbyes to my parents. Bryan had a smirk on his face in one corner. When I looked at Geena, she had a wistful smile on hers. I knew I couldn't stay mad at her forever. It was pointless. Bryan is nothing to me now anyway. So I gave her a slight nod... to give her hope that forgiveness would come... in time. She took a deep breath and it seemed to me like she was on the verge of crying.

I felt Ryder stand behind me. I finally turned around to face him. The look on his face was sober and cold, like he was bottling up all his anger, sadness and frustration until he is in the clear to let hell break loose.

"You can't avoid me forever." He whispered.

"I wasn't..." I started. But what's the point of denying the obvious?

He raised a brow at me. I met his gaze evenly. "Let's go home. Say your goodbyes to my parents. It will be the last you'll see of them."

He narrowed his eyes. Then he walked towards where my family is. He shook my father's hand and he gave my mother a hug.

On our way to his car, my father called out to him, "I will hold on to your word, Ryder."

Ryder nodded. "Yes, Sir."

When we climbed into his car, I glared at Ryder. "What was that?"

"Nothing." He answered and then he started the engine.

"You have to tell me!"

"No, I don't." He said.

"Why not?"

"Because it's just between your father and me." He replied.

I sat back on my seat, fuming by the second. How could Ryder make a private conversation with my father? What did he tell him? Why is my father asking him to keep his word? Is there a secret that my father told him that Ryder promised to keep? Is this about money or some investment that my father will make that Ryder agreed to help him with?

I'm going to call my parents to tell them that Ryder and I are over. I will have to break this fake engagement. It doesn't help if Ryder continued to rub elbows with my father. I already know and admit that I'm in love with him. I wanted this engagement to be over and done with so I can begin another journey into the healing process. It may feel worse this time around, but I've been here before and I survived it. I'm a rock!

What do they say? "Everyday is a test. If you wake up alive today, it means that you got an "A" for yesterday!" I got over Bryan. I'll get over Ryder too.

Ryder didn't betray me when he slept with Alizia, or if he tried to start things with her. He's absolutely free to do whatever he wants with his life. He actually held up his own life in lieu of the big favors I asked of him and I don't think that was fair.

I owe almost a hundred percent of my recovery to him. He helped me hold my head up high during that wedding, and because of him, my family doesn't think I was unfortunate and heartbroken. They thought I was a lucky girl who was better off with a better man. Because of Ryder, I wasn't a jobless bum who lived off Adam's charity. I manage a company that I love with all my heart.

In truth, I really was happier! I was happier with Ryder than I ever was with Bryan. Ryder did turn my world around, but I was... a coward. I was afraid that life with him was too perfect it didn't happen in real life. That I couldn't hold him long enough. That we lived in opposite poles and trying to make it work would only mean more chaos and heartbreak.

I was so bent on thinking that he and I could never be that I didn't even notice what was happening to me... that I was falling in love with him for real. I was stealing moments of heaven with him thinking that they only happen in dreams, that I forgot the fact that you cannot cheat your heart and my heart didn't know it was just a game... my heart thought that we were for real... that I can have him for my 'ever after'.

Had I figured this out before, I would probably have tried to confront my feelings and see if I can try existing in Ryder's world... even though I was scared. Now that Alizia had officially entered the picture, it reminded me that if I really do love Ryder, I should let him be happy... with one who's fit to be the wife of a tycoon and can raise future tycoons in accordance with the norms of the upper class society. One who would be easily accepted by his family.

That's Alizia. Ryder deserves Alizia. For all the good things that he is, he deserves to have a perfect life, free of complications of geography or status in life.

We reached my home. I know I can't force Ryder to tell me what his deal with my father was, but I can always pick up the phone and call my Dad. When I tell them that Ryder and I are over, my father will tell me the deal with Ryder and hopefully not pursue it anymore. Ryder need not be tied down to do favors he shouldn't be obliged to do.

I turned to him. "Thank you, Ryder." I whispered. He was looking at the road, his expression sober. He didn't say anything. "For everything. From the beginning... you have done more than your part and you've done it beautifully well. It was... a great 'fake' relationship." I giggled humorlessly. "But you know... it's gotta end some time."

He sighed. "Yes. It has to end."

I bit my lip to prevent a whimper from escaping my lips. That hurts. I know that it has to end, but hearing Ryder say it broke my heart ten times more. It was as if he just put out the last glimmer of hope that I had in my heart.

"I don't want to cause problems between you and... Alizia. I know she won't be happy about this, even if you tell her that you were just doing me a favor."

He didn't say anything. He continued to stare at the road soberly. After a full minute of silence, he went out of the car and opened my passenger door for me.

This is it! This is probably the last time I would see him. The last time that he would exist significantly in my life.

I went out of the car and we headed towards my door.

I turned to him and smiled. I know that smile looked horrible. I was trying my best not to cry. I missed him like crazy already.

"Thank you for coming with me." I whispered. "And thank you for pretending to be my fiance for... more than half a year. You were wonderful, Ryder. You're everything a girl could ever ask for. She's a very lucky girl." And then I tiptoed and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

He didn't say anything. He just stared down at me with that grave expression I cannot read. I stared back at him and I knew he can see the tears in my eyes.

I turned my back on him and headed towards my front door. I know I could only hold back the tears for less than a minute longer.

Then I heard him say, "Alizia and I are nothing."

I turned around to look at him. "What?"

He took a deep breath and took a step closer to me. "When you came to my house that night, she was there to use the bathroom. Said she can't use the toilet in the bar and she had to change her clothes or something. If it was a ploy to seduce me, I want you to know that she didn't succeed at it. Nothing happened. I took her back to her hotel just as soon as you walked out." When I looked up at him, I thought I saw a glimmer of light in his eyes. "You know I don't like aggressive women... and over the years, I've mastered the art of dodging them."

I took a deep breath. "It's actually none of my business. Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I want to know why you came to my house that night." He said. He was staring at me intensely. "The truth, Astrid. I think I at least deserve that!"

The intensity of his look and his voice almost scared me and made me want to run away. But I know he was right. He does deserve the truth. No matter what he decides to do with it.

"I wanted to get my answers..." I said. "I wanted to know what we are... what we could be..."

"You went out on a date." He said, a trace of annoyance still evident in his voice. "Are you opening yourself up to a possibility of a relationship?"

I shrugged. "I don't know." I whispered softly. "I guess I just wanted to prove to myself that... I was single."

"You weren't single, Astrid!" He said agitatedly. I stared up at him. "For months, you were in a relationship... with me!" His voice and his words made my mind go blank. "You were just too stubborn to admit it, Ash! And I put up with it! I waited! Until you'll finally be ready to admit it to yourself!"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It wasn't all fake for Ryder! It was easy enough for him to treat me like a princess, to answer to my whims... because for him it was all real.

Then his expression softened. "And I would never touch Alizia." He said. "Because I would never cheat on you, Ash."

Tears rolled down my cheeks. I was more confused now than a few moments ago. Now, more than ever, I do not know what Ryder and I are anymore. There is a thin line between pretending and reality.

"Maybe it's time we finally settle the score. Here. Now." He said soberly.

I stared up at him. He stepped closer to me and stared at me deeply.

"Are you ready to have a relationship, Astrid?" He asked seriously.

I took a deep breath. I nodded. Because, honestly, I think I am.

"Are you ready to be with me?"

He asked me the question I wanted him to ask. I knew the answer to that question now more than ever. In spite of all my fears, all my insecurities, all my uncertainties, I know what I want now. It may be a dream, but I want it. And I know in my heart, that I have to fight for it. Because Ryder is really worth it!

But when I stared up at him and saw the cold expression on his face, I couldn't find my voice.

"Do you even want to be with me?" He rephrased his question. But still I couldn't answer.

Ryder narrowed his eyes. He looked angry, frustrated and broken all at the same time. He shook his head in disbelief and then turned to walk away. I know I should say something, or this moment will pass and I will regret it forever.

"I want to be with you." I croaked. "Only... you." I added quietly.

He turned back to me. Somehow, something in his expression changed. The cold and angry expression was fading from his face. He took a step towards me. He looked at me deeply, reading every emotion in my teary eyes.

I took a deep breath. "But I'm scared, Ryder..."

He drew a deep sigh of relief. "Oh, God, sweetheart..." He whispered and the next thing I knew, I was enclosed in his warm embrace. The embrace I missed so much. Tears kept rolling down my cheeks.

"I've been burned and deceived in the past. I was scared for that to happen again. I prevented myself from falling in love with you. Because I know we didn't exist in the same world. I didn't want to lose you in my life. And I didn't want to get hurt anymore."

"Why will I hurt you? I, more than anyone, know the hell you have been through." He said.

"Why me, Ryder?" I reminded him. "I have nothing to give you in return."

"I already have everything." He said. "You're the only thing I want."

"I'm not glamorous, I'm not rich, I'm not fit for someone like Ryder Van Woodsen. I'm not what your society or your family expects or wishes for you."

He laughed and hugged me tighter. "On the contrary, you're exactly what my family would wish for me. I think you will dazzle my society without even trying. And maybe you don't know that Ryder Van Woodsen didn't want a rich wife. He just wanted a woman who would love him even if he was poor." Then he pulled away from me so he could look into my eyes. "And that's you, love."