"Tell Diprovan h.e.l.lo."

"Nick . . ." Ellen shook her head, unamused. She turned back in the doorway. "I'm sorry about the dinner. It was a nice thought." Then she looked at the sunflowers on the counter. "You're such a romantic."

Chapter 8.

FOR A WHILE I just stood there. Popeye, my new dinner partner, purred against my leg.

I guess, like some spurned high school kid, I was hoping that Ellen might have second thoughts and come back. I had this feeling that the weight of our relationship was suddenly hinging on a hope no stronger than that.

But there was no sound on the stairs. No saving key in the door. I was thirty-eight, head of a major anticrime task force, a big shot in the FBI, and here I was scooping out a container of pasta meant for two-a stranger in my own home.

The silence was suddenly orchestral.

I went into the bedroom and took off my tie and jacket, then checked in the study for a fax. There was a long brick wall covered with bookshelves. Most of the books were from my days at school, and there were a few of Ellen's medical texts. The desk was piled high with briefs from Cavello's trial. On the wall there was a large framed black-and-orange banner: PRINCETON 1989 IVY LEAGUE FOOTBALL CHAMPS.

I had bones that still ached just thinking of those days.

I took the pasta and some wine into the living room and sat there with my feet propped up on an old steamer trunk that acted as a coffee table. I picked up the book I'd been reading, Clinton's My Life, My Life, and found the page where I'd left off, on the Camp David Middle East peace talks. I thought about turning on the Knicks game. After a few minutes I lifted my eyes without reading a single page. and found the page where I'd left off, on the Camp David Middle East peace talks. I thought about turning on the Knicks game. After a few minutes I lifted my eyes without reading a single page.

Did I love her? Was this going to work? Ellen was terrific, but right now we were just going in different directions. And this trial wasn't going to help.

Are you going to fight for this, Nicky?

I reached for Popeye. "C'mon, you look like you could use a date."

I grabbed my old college alto sax from the corner and, with Popeye in hand, went up to the roof. This was where I worked it out sometimes.

It was a cold, clear night. The stars were out over Manhattan. The Empire State Building was lit up red, white, and blue. Across the river, Jersey City might've been Paris, it so dazzled with lights. So I sat there, a few days before the most important trial of my life, Ellen's cat purring at my feet, and played.

Clarence Clemons's riff from Springsteen's "Jungleland." A clunky version of Coltrane's "Blue Train." I came to the conclusion that there was a hole in my life, and no matter how long I put Cavello away for, I wasn't going to fill it.

You either fight for it or you don't, Nick. You fought for everything. So why won't you fight for Ellen Jaffe?

Chapter 9.

I TOOK MY PLACE in the front of the courtroom on Monday morning. My blood was pounding. It always did on the first day of a trial, and this one was huge. huge.

The lawyers for both sides filled up the first two rows of the courtroom. Joel Goldenberger was the government's lead prosecutor. He was younger than he looked, maybe thirty-three, tall, self-a.s.sured, with light, bushy hair and an agreeable smile. But inside he was a fighter, a real believer. Everyone was talking about him as a future star in the Justice Department. He had already won three well-publicized Wall Street trials.

On the other side sat Hy Kaskel, paging through his notes. The Ferret stood no taller than five five in lifts, with short boxer's arms, but he resembled his nickname in every way when it came to discrediting a witness. Today he wore a dark navy pinstripe suit and striped club tie, a pair of fancy gold cuff links peeking through the sleeves.

In the front row of the gallery I saw Cavello's family. A plump, pleasant-looking woman in a plain but tasteful suit, needlepointing away. And a grown daughter, with wavy, long blond hair, sitting loyally by her mom. Security at the courthouse was tighter than I'd ever seen it before. h.e.l.l, I was probably responsible for half of the fuss. Every bag was being opened, every juror's pa.s.s double-checked, every press credential checked back against a photo ID. Armed cops were manning the barricades all over Foley Square.

Cavello was being brought through an underground pa.s.sageway from the Manhattan County Jail two blocks away, where he was being held in his own wing on a maximum security floor. From there, he was transported to the seventh floor in a guarded elevator.

I only wished we had sequestered the jury. This was the biggest organized crime trial in years. But the judge wanted to make a name for herself. Miriam Seiderman had her eye on the state supreme court. She had a.s.surances from the lawyers, from the defendant himself. She wanted the trial conducted in the open light of day.

The door finally opened near the rear. A buzz of antic.i.p.ation rippled through the air.

Two burly-looking marshals led the defendant inside. Cavello's hands were cuffed in front of him. He was dressed in a brown checked sports jacket and a restrained olive tie, his graying hair nicely trimmed. He didn't look like the animal everyone was expecting. More like a normal, everyday citizen you might see riding next to you on the train.

Cavello took a look around and nodded, as if impressed with the crowded room. The marshals took him to a chair next to his lawyer. They freed his hands. Kaskel leaned over and whispered something in Cavello's ear that made the defendant smile. Our gazes met for a second. His eyes lit up, and he smiled again as if to say, Good to see you here, Nicky. You really think you can beat me? Good to see you here, Nicky. You really think you can beat me?

Sharon Ann Moran, the judge's clerk, stood. "All rise."

Through the side door, Judge Seiderman entered the room. She was a smallish, attractive woman with graying hair, a pleasant face, and a tastefully short skirt beneath her judge's cloak. This was the biggest case of her life, too. She took her seat behind the bench and motioned everyone down.

"Mr. Goldenberger, is the government ready?"

"We are, Your Honor." The prosecutor stood and nodded.

"Mr. Kaskel?"

"Yes, Your Honor. The defendant is ready too, and eager to prove his innocence." The Ferret arched his eyebrows. He looked like he was itching for a fight.

"Then, Ms. Moran"-the judge nodded to her clerk, who headed over to the jury room-"you can bring in the jury now."

Chapter 10.

ANDIE DEGRa.s.sE was fifteen minutes late that morning. That morning of all mornings. How could it have happened? Well, easy . . .

First, Jarrod couldn't find his math book. Then the IRT was backed up, signal switches down. Then, when she finally reached the City Hall station, the two blocks to the courthouse were barricaded off, all because of this d.a.m.n trial.

It took her fifteen minutes just to get herself through security. A heavyset female guard in a blue blazer went through her purse like it had al Qaeda emblazoned on the buckle. They checked her cell phone like it was a WMD. Finally, Andie said, "You know that big Mafia trial up on the seventh floor?" The security guard nodded. "Well, it's not starting without me."

By the time she had burst through the jury-room doors, everybody was sitting around the large conference table, looking nervous and tense.

"Sorry." Andie sighed loudly, acknowledging a few familiar faces. "You don't even want to know."

"Ms. DeGra.s.se," Sharon Ann announced, checking off names, "it's really good you could make time for us in your busy schedule."

Already in trouble. Andie sat down sheepishly. She found herself next to Rosella, the Hispanic woman she had been next to during jury selection. Andie sat down sheepishly. She found herself next to Rosella, the Hispanic woman she had been next to during jury selection.

"That leaves only Mr. O'Flynn." Sharon Ann looked at the list, unamused.

A couple of men were reading or doing crosswords. Two of the women had brought paperback novels. There were bagels and m.u.f.fins and coffee on the table, courtesy of the judge.

"Here," Rosella said, pa.s.sing her the tray.

"Thanks." Andie smiled, delighted to shift the attention off herself. She took a m.u.f.fin in a napkin. "No latte, I see."

There were a few chuckles. She looked toward Sharon Ann for at least a hint of a smile. The clerk was as tight as a drum this morning.

The door swung open, and in burst John O'Flynn, red-faced and sweating profusely. "Jeez, guys, it's like a jungle out there, a zoo. The L.I.E. at rush hour. Unbelievable."

"O'Flynn," Sharon Ann confirmed derisively, "I was starting to think I was going to have to put out an APB on you. Nine-thirty tomorrow, Mr. O'Flynn." Sharon Ann tapped her pencil.

"Aye, aye, ma'am." O'Flynn saluted. He plopped himself on a chair next to Andie.

"Nine-thirty tomorrow?" Hector, a cable guy, groaned. "You mean this trial's gonna last that long?"

"Eight weeks, Mr. Ramirez," Sharon Ann replied. "Something better you have to do for the next two months?"

"Yeah, maybe earn a living," the cable guy replied glumly.

Sharon Ann went to the door. "I'm going to check on how things are going. I want to remind you to observe the judge's instructions not to talk about the case."

"Sure." Everybody nodded. It took about two seconds after the door had shut for that to change.

"This Cavello guy"-Winston, the mechanic, still in his work clothes, looked around at the others-"I was reading up on him. Sounds like a pretty creepy dude."

"Murder, extortion, cramming body parts into the trunks of cars. It has a way of blocking the digestion," chortled Marc, the crime novelist.

Rosella put down her yarn. "My huzban's a little scared. He said, 'Whazzamatter, Rosie, you can't get yourself on a nice traffic dispute for a few days? You gotta get on with this wacko mobster?'"

"Hang on," Andie interrupted, "you heard the judge. We don't actually know he's wacko yet. We have to wait until we hear the evidence evidence to determine he's wacko." to determine he's wacko."

A few people laughed.

"More to the point"-Andie looked around the table-"what about the fact that these mob guys know all our names and where we live?" A few jurors nodded, each with the same look of concern.

The door to the courtroom opened. There was a hush. Andie had the feeling everybody's eyes were warning her.

Then Sharon Ann was standing there, her narrow gaze centered directly on Andie. "In my office," she said. Her "office" was one of the two bathrooms, which the other day had been designated for private conversations.

"Huh?"

"In my office, Ms. DeGra.s.se," Sharon Ann ordered her.

Slowly Andie rose and, with a roll of the eyes, followed the dour court clerk into the cramped bathroom.

"Don't think I don't know what you're up to, Ms. DeGra.s.se," Sharon Ann snapped as soon as the door had closed.

"W-what I'm up to?" Andie stammered. "I didn't say anything that everyone in that room hasn't already thought to themselves."

Even her sister, Rita. It had been the first thing out of her mouth. Doesn't it make you a little worried? I mean, they know you, Andie. It's Dominic Cavello. They know where you live. Doesn't it make you a little worried? I mean, they know you, Andie. It's Dominic Cavello. They know where you live. You didn't need to be a mother to be worried. Just You didn't need to be a mother to be worried. Just human. human. The whole selection process had been right out in the open. "Listen, Sharon Ann, I . . ." The whole selection process had been right out in the open. "Listen, Sharon Ann, I . . ."

"You've wanted off this thing from the very beginning." Sharon Ann cut her off. "I'm not having anyone anyone poisoning this jury. You got your wish-you're history, lady." poisoning this jury. You got your wish-you're history, lady."

Chapter 11.

ANDIE RETOOK HER SEAT back in the jury room, blushing, a little embarra.s.sed and hurt. A few minutes later the door to the courtroom opened again, and she found out just what the judge's clerk meant.

Sharon Ann stuck her head in. "We're not quite ready yet." Then she pointed a finger toward Andie, motioning her up. "Ms. DeGra.s.se . . ."

A flutter of nerves went down Andie's spine.

"Can you come with me, please? And you can bring your things."

Andie slowly got up, flashing a resigned look around the table. She was gone!

She followed Sharon Ann into the courtroom, which, to her surprise, was hushed and packed. And all eyes seemed to be centered on her. She felt really embarra.s.sed now, like she was being publicly marched into the boss's office and fired-just for speaking her mind.

Sharon Ann led her through a side door in the courtroom behind the judge's bench. A marshal was guarding the hallway. Sharon Ann motioned flatly. "Go in. She's waiting for you."

Andie stepped inside the large, book-lined room. Judge Seiderman looked up from behind a desk covered with papers.

"Ms. DeGra.s.se." She peered over her reading gla.s.ses. "It's come to my attention you seem to have a bit of nervous stomach of the mouth."

"I beg your pardon?"

"You have trouble keeping your mouth shut, don't you?" The judge looked at her sternly. "It might've been amusing during jury selection, but now. . . . We're about to start an important trial, not a theatrical audition. I can't afford any troublemakers on this jury."

Andie stood her ground. "If you're talking about what I said in there, I actually thought it was a pretty legitimate question."

"What, Ms. DeGra.s.se?" Judge Seiderman looked up impatiently. Ms. DeGra.s.se?" Judge Seiderman looked up impatiently.

"Everyone heard our names during selection. And where we live. If we're married or not. Or have any kids. Anyone in their right mind would be concerned. Certainly, people have raised questions."

"People?" The judge arched her brows.

"I don't know. My sister. My mother. When I told them I was on this case. That can't exactly be a shock to you."

"Why we opted for how we conduct this trial is the court's business, Ms. DeGra.s.se. All you have to know is that if we thought there was the slightest danger to the jury, I a.s.sure you it would be our first concern." Judge Seiderman sat back. She took out an official slip and reached for a pen. "You've wanted off this trial from the beginning, haven't you?"