Chapter 14: The Origin of the Pan Family’s Ridiculous Names

“Tian’er, I’ll talk to you about my family members’ names. It is a simple history of China’s development. I will only talk to you about it because if other people knew, I’ll be killed by my uncle.”

In order to be liked by Tian Yuan, he must hand over all of his family to him. Don’t think that as soon as he reached 30 years old, he had already matured. He is now just a boy who’s trying his best to obtain a favorable impression.

At this point, Pan Lei wants to expose his household’s ‘shameful matter’ to Tian Yuan. He believes that his entire family will understand him for doing this.

He wants to see Tian Yuan laugh. Tian Yuan is simpleminded so when he smiles thoughtlessly, he looked so adorable. How can there be such a person whom he loves from the bottom of his heart but he still can’t get enough of him? Every move he makes like when he sighs and frowns, he thinks it is charming, even when he’s only drinking soup, he still thinks it is charming, and even when he smiled when he sprayed the tea, it still looked charming!

Tian Yuan revealed a “want to know very much” expression. He wants to know about the Pan family’s three generations of poor peasants who currently hold a prominent family background. Tian Yuan, at first, wanted to hide far away from this bandit, but he can not stop his heart from wanting to gossip.

Pan Lei took a paper and pen and drew something. First, he wrote his grandfather’s name, Pan Jianguo. “Probably, my great grandfather was also hoping for China's unification. He hoped that my grandfather will become a man with lofty ideals. So he gave him the name, Pan Jianguo.” {T/N: Jiànguó – to build a country}

Pan Lei placed his grandfather’s name at the top of the paper and scored four lines downwards, that is to say, his grandfather has four children including his father.

"My big uncle is called Pan Kangri. {T/N: kàngrì – means to resist j.a.pan; anti-j.a.panese} He was born in the Anti-j.a.panese Era. My second uncle, Pan Neizhan, was born during the Chinese Civil War. {T/N: nèizhàn – means civil war} I told my grandma that I wanted to call my second uncle Pan Communist, which means **, but of course I got reprimanded.”

{T/N: ** was originally written like that in the raw so I left it as it is since I do not have any idea on what the author meant.}

This time, Tian Yuan was not able to endure, and the last mouthful of rice sprayed out. Pan Lei, with a deadpan expression, was earnestly explaining to him the meaning behind the names of his close relatives from the previous generation.

Tian Yuan can’t help but slap the table while laughing without restraint. Pan Lei’s grandfather was truly a genius and really talented. The history of new China’s development had grown too personal when he had used them to name his children.

“My dad and my aunt are twins. My dad is called Pan Yuanchao and my aunt’s name is Pan Kangmei.”  {T/N: yuán – means to a.s.sist, while cháo – means government; kàngměi – means anti-Americas or to resist the USA}

Then under each elder, he drew four lines each. Now, they have reached Pan Lei’s generation. “My eldest brother’s name is a little strange. His given name is Pan Zhan, but his nickname is very odd. Because of this nickname, he left home. Now, if someone dares to call him by his nickname, it is estimated that he will kill.” {T/N: zhǎn – means to open up}

“My eldest brother’s nickname is ‘broken four children’.”

Tian Yuan reached for his neck and thought, broken four children? Is it some kind of old folk customs in the countryside?

“The year he was born was the second year when the Gang of Four [1] was crushed and disintegrated. In order to celebrate this vindication, my grandfather wanted the first grandson to be called as Pan Posi’er.” {T/N: pò – means broken/destroyed; sì – means four; and ér – means child/son}

Tian Yuan almost choked himself, so he didn’t drink anymore. He felt that he needed to meet this ‘grandfather deity’. He was just too brave. No wonder his eldest brother would leave home. This is worse than a dog’s cleverness.

“My second brother, Pan Ge, was born at a good time which was during the reform and opening up. {T/N: gé – means to reform} My elder sister’s name is Pan Yue which was inspired by the Great Leap Forward [2] movement.” {T/N: yuè – to exceed/surpa.s.s}

Pan Lei finally wrote his own name with a look of gladness written all over his face. “During the time when I was born, things were comparatively better. That time, Hong Kong and Macau did not return to China. Otherwise, I would’ve been called Pan Gui. {T/N: gui – means to return} According to my grandma, when I was born, it thundered and so, I was named Pan Lei.” {T/N: léi – means thunder}

It is indeed the history of the development of China. This is a manifestation of the awkward persistence of the older generation to name their descendants after the country’s progress over times.

“Is your family very strict? Is your grandfather still alive? Now, is he also controlling you using the family law?” Tian Yuan is getting more and more curious about this ‘grandfather deity’ and really wanted to meet him. He must be a stubborn, troublesome, and serious person.

“Our family law is very strict. Grandpa’s rules are even stricter than those of the army. Being punished is a common affair. If you look at my dad and my uncles, they are all in their sixties, but they still get angry due to these rules. They still had to carry firearms on their shoulders to run ten kilometers. During those times, even a few of our brothers hated it.”

Probably thinking of his father who was punished by carrying a bag while running, Pan Lei looked very happy. His eyes were smiling. These unfilial children… the father tosses his son and the son’s father helps his grandson bully his father back. This family sure is lively.

“Speaking of family law, Tian’er, let’s also set our own family rules. Just like the army, we observe the law, and must not make mistakes; else, you’ll have to be punished. I found out that you have some bad habits and there’s a need to change them.”

Tian Yuan immediately put away the look of gossip on his face and made a smile filled with indifference. “I am not your family’s person. Why should you set the rules? I’m living very well, and I do not need to change. Also, this is my home. I do not need you to dictate me.”

Tidying up the dishes, Pan Lei took a quick step and went to wash the dishes. He swiftly moved and finished was.h.i.+ng once the pattering and cras.h.i.+ng sounds ceased. Pan Lei went to the couch and saw Tian Yuan languidly watching TV.

Pan Lei had prepared everything. With his upright waist and back and the paper and pen laid out, he pulled up Tian Yuan to sit. The entire meeting was similar to the six-party talks [3]. The pair was about to have a serious talk.

Tian Yuan is having some headaches. This outrageously honorable and honest man was still interested in pursuing it. The other guy was so serious that Tian Yuan was already feeling very tired.

“Once again, I am telling you that you are definitely my family’s person. My life depends on my person and my death lies on my family’s soul. Don’t put yourself at sixes and sevens. The military family must have a militarized management, and you must manage this lazy appearance of yours.” {T/N: at sixes and sevens (idiom) – means in a state of total confusion or disarray}

Tian Yuan opened his mouth to oppose, but Pan Lei glared at him. “Shut up. When the commanding officer speaks, the soldier is not allowed to open his mouth. If you have any opinions, we’ll talk about it after we are done.”

“Bandit!” Tian Yuan didn’t want to care about him. He really didn’t take himself as an outsider. He thought that a meal would buy the hearts of people? If that’s the case, he should fall in love with the hospital’s chef because he always eats in the cafeteria. Who does he think he is?

Tian Yuan let his seemingly boneless body lie back down on the couch, and continued to watch the lively variety show.

“The family law’s most important rule is [don’t let yourself get hurt]. This is something that we must do. I will protect you when I’m around you. But when I’m not with you, you should also try your best not to hurt yourself, whether it’d be physically or psychologically. Look at what had happened today, you disregarded the location. You just had to throw a tantrum, like a b**** at such place. No matter if it’s arguing or quarreling, we should go home to discuss about it. You can take all your anger on me and I wouldn’t hit you. Even if you were to wrestle with me, I will still listen. But you can’t make trouble outside. What if you met an accident? If you got injured, I will be distressed. What if the two of us got hurt? Definitely, not worth it.”

Pan Lei was very serious in discussing this issue with him. This is what he’s been wanting to say when Tian Yuan almost had an accident. He can create trouble outside, play crazy, bicker and lose his temper, but with the premise that he must not be injured. Not even a small wound should appear on him. He can’t withstand Tian Yuan having a wound even if it’s small.

Pan Lei’s career made him accustomed to beating, regardless if it was during recruit training or special training. But there shouldn’t be wounds on his person. He couldn’t let Tian Yuan be injured and not even Pan Lei, himself, can hurt him. Today, the driver timely stopped the car. If Tian Yuan was really hit by the car, he would definitely make the bus company unable to open for business anymore.

Tian Yuan leaned towards him. Please, big brother, he is not a two-and-half-year-old child. He is not a little girl but a big gentleman. He does not need to say these deceptive words that’s giving him gooseb.u.mps.

“This is a rule that must be carried out and enforced. Make a mistake and you’ll have to wait for me to clean you up.”

At this, Tian Yuan only gave him a single reply. “Humph!”

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