"Did you not see the junior reporting job? It's in hockey, for crying out loud. Girl, you need to be checking the internal job postings."

This whole situation was too bizarre. It was like getting discovered for a movie while working as a waitress. I saw myself as more of a background person, but I did enjoy the attention that the car commercial had brought. Would even I like to be on TV? Wait, a hockey job? So, I'd get to go to hockey games, talk hockey, and analyze hockey? Well, that would be a dream come true. But I shouldn't get too excited; you never knew what might go wrong.

Too late. I was already pumped.

"Wow, that's a fantastic opportunity!" April was ecstatic. I told her once everything was official. She saw my being on television as a chance for her to pass on all her acting knowledge. "We'll have to shop for your on-air wardrobe. Of course, once you get a higher profile, you'll get sponsored by a local designer or clothing line."

"Really? Someone choosing my clothes and paying for them sounds perfect."

"I think it's better to develop your own style. What do you think of a retro look? Little nipped in jackets and pencil skirts." Leave it to April to turn any happy occasion into a shopping expedition. And I'd never worn a pencil skirt in my life.

"No way. I can't navigate an arena in a pencil skirt. Unless I wear running shoes with it."

April shuddered at that thought. "You're right. I'm projecting. But I have learned a few things being a stylist. We'll find clothes to reflect your personality."

"Which is-?"

"Sporty chic."

"What? Like the Spice Girls?" I didn't think that neon sports tanks and Adidas pants were going to work.

"Not Sporty Spice-it's more a tomboy style. I'll show you in the store, that'll be easier than us discussing fashion."

She forced me to go shopping that weekend, with promises of a nice lunch. April's vision turned out to be something I really liked.

"I love these pants." They were plain black and rode low on my hips and then flared a little at the bottom. Like boot cut jeans but in nice fabric.

"Yup. I'm going with your natural boyish vibe. We need a belt now." She rooted around and came up with something with a square silver buckle. Somehow it perfectly tied together the black patterned shirt with the pants.

"Wow, April. You're so good at this."

"I know. One thing I've learned as a stylist is not to make people look like I think they should-but what makes them comfortable. It's psychological." She kept giving me her x-ray stare. "You need a jacket too-something with unique details. But keep your hair down. You need a feminine look for this to work. A nice boot with a short heel and you're dressed. I wouldn't mind a little jewellery too."

"I have a necklace. It was a birthday gift, and I haven't worn it much yet," I told her. I had broken up with Jimmy shortly after, so I hadn't really wanted a reminder of him. But maybe it was time to take it out of the box.

"Okay, show me when we get home. We need to get another pair of pants, and a few more tops, then we'll be done."

I groaned. Major damages to my credit card were coming, and I was used to thrifty living. But if I did all the shopping now, I wouldn't have to worry about clothes for months.

"Okay, but I have to be home in two hours. I'm coaching tonight."

"Oh right. What are you going to do about your little hockey team when you start your new job?"

"I've taken care of things," I said with regret. I knew my hours were going to be insane, so I had explained to Mark and Henrietta what was happening. They were disappointed, but thrilled for me.

"You can't miss out on an opportunity like that, Kelly," Mark said. "Are we going to be seeing you on the Canucks broadcast?"

I shook my head. "I'll be starting at the bottom." I didn't know exactly what I'd be doing since I had yet to meet with anyone from my new job.

I called up Lily, a friend from my minor hockey days, and she agreed to fill in as coach. I would still come to every game that I could, but they wouldn't be able to count on me.

Henrietta and I discussed what to do about the extra skating sessions. We decided that we had weeded out all the unreliable volunteers, and with a couple of parents to make sure the kids walked the 200 metres from the school to the rink in safety, so the program could run itself now.

"I'm not even sure if we still need the sessions. The kids you've been working with are almost as good as the others now. And maybe Mark should run team practices with everyone," Henrietta said.

"Well, you'll have Lily to help in any case. And she's really nice and a good hockey player as well."

"We're going to really miss you," Henrietta said, and Mark nodded.

I felt so guilty leaving mid-season. "I'm really sorry. I'll still come to all the games I can." I'd try hard to make games and practices a priority, but so much was uncertain right now.

Cheryl warned me to be ready to work my butt off. She said that the television side was more demanding than radio. And once Ross Laurie had decreed I was going to the TV side, everyone treated me with more respect-even Andy and Randy. Cheryl took care of replacing me, and Ruby called to wish me luck. I was getting so excited. I had called my parents to tell them and they were so pleased.

April managed to wrap up the shopping in only another hour. Then we had a late lunch at this little noodle shop on Main Street. We got home with plenty of time for me to get to the kids' game. April came to my room to organize my closet.

"Remember, your appearance is important now. You can't get up five minutes before and throw on anything. Plan your outfits the night before. And iron them." Living with April had given her too many insights into my true character.

I scrunched up my face, which only drew attention to another flaw.

"I'm going to get a pro to give you a make-up tutorial. The camera is very unforgiving."

To distract her, I pulled open a drawer and got out the necklace Jimmy gave me. "Here, April. Will this go with my new shirts?"

She squinted at it. "Oh, a Tiffany knock-off. That's a good one-but I think it may be too glittery for on camera, too distracting."

"Oh, okay." I went to put it back in the box. "It's actually not a knock-off, it's from Tiffany's."

April was beside me in a flash and examined the necklace carefully. If she had a jeweller's loupe, she would have pulled it out. "Where did you get this?"

"Jimmy gave it to me for my birthday. He told me it wasn't expensive though."

"Oh, that explains it. But it is expensive-I would say it's worth four grand at least. These are diamonds on a platinum setting."

I looked at the key necklace, which I had basically stuffed in my drawer and not thought about for months. "No fucking way. Four thousand dollars? That's more money than I make in a month. My whole wardrobe isn't worth that."

"Too true," said April. "But Kelly-it's from Tiffany's. Even you're not clueless enough to think that they're selling costume jewellery."

I flopped on my bed. Jimmy told me it wasn't expensive, and I was that clueless.

April carefully put the necklace back in the box. "He was really into you, wasn't he?"

"I guess." Finding out that the necklace cost so much actually bothered me though. "But you know, if he really got me-he would never give me something like this. Now I can't even wear it without worrying that I need a bodyguard."

"Do you still miss him?" she wondered.

Only every night. "Kind of," I said. "But you know, the fact that I'm getting all these new job opportunities makes me think I did the right thing."

"Work and love don't have to be mutually exclusive, you know."

I knew that. But it wasn't a choice between Jimmy and working-it was a lot more complicated. For me, it was a choice of being myself or getting bowled over by his agenda, no matter how well meaning. While still I wanted to be Jimmy's girlfriend, I really didn't want to be an NHL girlfriend.

34.

The Dream Job

My first day of work felt a lot like the first day at a new school. I was even wearing all new clothes. I looked nice, and hopefully I had removed every price tag.

Everything on the television side was nicer. The reception area was bigger and cooler, there were more people bustling around, and everyone looked slicker here than in the radio area.

The receptionist was a slim redhead who I knew a little from my own receptionist days, but she seemed not to recognize me now. "Kelly, Mr. Williams is ready for you now. Straight down the hall, he's in the corner office."

Brendan Williams was the Pacific Bureau Chief. C2C Sports was divided into four regions, and he ran our television division. None of the offices here were huge, since most people worked in the bullpen when they weren't in the studio or on location. But his office had a real door and a view of the parking lot beside the building.

I walked in. He was busy on the phone and motioned for me to sit down. He was a middle-aged, balding guy who looked like he might have been an athlete at one time, but had since let everything slide.

Finally, he hung up and looked at me over his glasses.

"So, you're my new reporter."

"Yes. I'm Kelly Tanaka." Duh, he knew that, of course. But it seemed weird that we hadn't introduced ourselves.

"I can see here that you have extensive broadcast experience: three months as a radio producer and a car commercial. Am I forgetting anything?"

It wasn't like I had ever lied about my experience, but I felt instantly guilty. However, I didn't want to back down completely. "I have a university degree in Communications, and I know a lot about hockey. I've played for years."

"Ah yes, a university degree in Communications. Well, let me communicate very clearly with you here. Ross Laurie may have some kind of hard-on for your pretty face and hot little ass, but I actually have to put programming on the air, and I certainly don't appreciate having to hire you over the hundreds of more qualified candidates out there. I have to give you a chance, so I will. But believe me, I will be watching for you to screw up and as soon as you do-you're out-no matter what Laurie may say."

"That seems clear enough," I replied. Wow, only a few minutes ago I was looking forward to this job.

"Okay, that's it for now. Report to Bob Bernhardt, your unit director, and start working. Or as close as you can get to working."

It didn't seem like "thank you" or even "good bye" were necessary here, so I slunk out of his office.

Bob Bernhardt was not around, and since I didn't even have a desk yet, I made my way to H.R. where I knew there would be paperwork. On the way back, I ran into Arthur Kim. He would know exactly what was going on. I pulled him into the stairwell. "Talk to me. Why am I getting shafted on my first day on the job?"

"Oh my God, Kelly, I just found out this morning, or I would have given you a heads-up. Brendan Williams hates Ross Laurie, because they were both up for a job in Toronto. Laurie got the job, and Williams got shipped out here. Laurie's been promoted twice since then and now he's-well, you know what he is."

"So, Williams is taking his resentment out on me?"

"Oh yes. He figures if you screw up, it'll show that Laurie has terrible judgement. Williams told everyone that he's looking for a reason to get rid of you-so watch your back. They've already started an office pool on what day you're getting fired."

"What? You can't be serious."

Arthur nodded. "Most of the bets are under one month. Someone even has today."

"That's cruel. I didn't force myself into this job-it was the network president's idea."

"Kelly, you have to admit-your resume is a little thin."

"I know. But I got the hang of Ruby's job in no time."

"Being a radio producer is not like being an on-air reporter. Lots of people would kill to be on-air."

"Awesome, so half the people want me to get fired so they can have my job, and half want me to get fired so they can win money. Have I got that straight?"

Arthur patted my arm sympathetically. "More than half."

And getting fired wouldn't just mean going back to the radio side. There was a temporary producer in my place, and Ruby was back in two months. Everyone loved Gloria, our adorable new receptionist. So if I got turfed here, I was shit out of luck. I'd have to save every extra penny. Who knew when my rainy day might come? This was Vancouver, after all.

It was pretty hard to believe that things could go downhill after that great start to my job, but they actually did. For the first time in my life, I was typed as a slut. Seriously, a girl who had never even dated until Grade 12, and had biblically known only three guys in her life, was now a slut.

According to the grapevine, I had given blowjobs to Ross Laurie of such high quality that he had vaulted me to my new career as on air talent. Furthermore, I was forced into this job after my career as a puck bunny failed when James Frechette dumped me without the millions I was hoping for, even though I was such a sexpert. Honestly, high school was bad for gossip, but it had nothing on a television station full of frustrated middle-aged men with great imaginations. Apparently women were only good for one thing-two, if you counted the b.j.s.

I was being left to sink or swim-all by myself. Given how little I knew about television broadcasting, it seemed pretty sure that I would sink. I wasn't qualified, but I thought I could do the job if given an opportunity. But all my opportunities would have to be earned by hard work and determination. Good thing I'd always supported lost causes.

Bob Bernhardt, my boss, was almost nice to me. The direction from Toronto was that I had to be on-air, doing hockey. The direction from Williams was to minimize my presence. Since these two directives contradicted each other, Bernhardt decided that I should begin by training. However he didn't have time to invent a training program, so he gave me clerical work or sent me to watch other people doing their jobs. Since these people were stressed out and overworked, being a useless observer wasn't making me popular. I kept offering to help and getting turned down. After all, Williams had already decreed I was shark bait.