Lover's Love Diary

Year XX Month XX Day XX

He can't remember anything. He's broken from drinking.

G.o.d knows if I can, I really want to beat him and go to the f#cking drinking section. Lu Ran, you are such a jerk!

He forgot everything, that is my first time, a.s.shole!

I was really angry with Lu Ran, but I can't bear to beat him, I can't bear it...

He said that he will be responsible, but I don't want his responsibility. I don't want our relations.h.i.+p to be just because of responsibility. I love him. Even if he said he likes me, I don't care if the love between us is not equal. I just want to make myself more motivated.

Forget it, don't think about it. It's all over.

I hope we can do it in a sober state next time. I don't want to encounter this kind of thing anymore. It's like he gave me a candy. But when I eat this candy, I bite it and find that it's all gla.s.s crumbs inside. It's really uncomfortable.

Year XX Month XX Day XX

I'm really very happy. Lu Ran called me baby. I don't know if it means that he began to like me.

It doesn't matter. What matters is that I like what he called me.

Lu Ran, I am greedy. You are so kind to me. The better you are to me, the more greedy I am. I will want more and more.

But to be honest, we've been getting on with each other more and more recently. It's a good feeling.

...

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Year XX Month XX Day XX

My happiest thing is to have a birthday with Lu Ran. This year's birthday wish: I hope Lu Ran can tell me that he love me.

Lu Ran I love you, every day I love you more than the day before yesterday. When can you understand my love for you?

I love you, loving you has become my instinct, my habit, it's engraved in my blood, I love you with all my strength, and I look forward to and wait for the day when you love me, I really hope that day will come soon.

...

Year XX Month XX Day XX

I think the problem between us is getting bigger and bigger. I'm so tired, really tired. I've tried to give up many times.

I miss home. I want to go home. Lu Ran, if I can, I want to pack you and take you home.

I want to tell everyone.

Look, this is the person I like. I love him for a long time. I can't be happy without him for a long time.

He is a very good person, he is my salvation, my faith, my G.o.d.

Because of him, I also become better and better, because I am afraid that if I do not do well one day he will not want me.

Love makes people worry about gain and loss, love makes people humble, but I am reluctant to give up, although I am a coward, although I often feel very painful and uneasy, but when I think of the idea of being with him, I will stick to it.

There are so many people in the world that I like. There is only one I love. I want to be good to him and I do not want him sad, because his sorrow makes me feel worse than his own...

His name is Lu Ran. I love him. If I can, I hope he can love me.

Qu Yang said to me, since the love so strained then find someone else.

But I can't do it.

[Because it's not him]

TN:

[0] Gu Qingyan's diary can also read as "Male Lover's Love Diary" or "Mistress's Love Diary"