Passing Thoughts

Translated by LyraDhani

Edited by LyraDhani

When Tsugumi arrived at the hospital, he was made to undergo a physical examination whether he met Chidori or not. He collapsed right in front of the staff, and he kept crying as if he was enduring the pain, so it was a natural step to take. In a way, he was grateful for that, because Tsugumi was not sure how he felt about meeting Chidori in his current state of mind.

By the time he had completed several tests, including blood tests and an MRI, the sun had already set.

Well, there doesnt seem to be anything wrong with your body. Does your head hurt anymore?

The doctor asked him as he looked at the test results.

Yes. It seemed to be temporary, and now it doesnt hurt at all.

Thats good to hear. But if the pain appears again, it might be better to have a government surgeon take a look at it this time instead of a hospital. The effects of witchcraft are often impossible to determine with ordinary medicine. Well then, take care of yourself. I will send a nurse to take you to your sisters room later, so please wait in the waiting room on this floor.

I understand. Thank you very much.

He thanked the doctor and left the examination room. He was just about to leave the doctors office when he saw a girl standing by the door, leaning against it.

Ah, Tsugumi-kun. I heard from the staff that you suddenly collapsed.

Saying that, the girl with a worried faceSuzushiro rushed toward him.

Ah, yeah. Theres nothing wrong with me. Sorry for worrying you.

I see, Im glad!

Seeing Suzushiro patting her chest in relief, Tsugumi gave a small smile. Seeing her genuinely concerned about her friend, he felt his depressed heart lighten a little. At the same time, however, a heavy, painful feeling of guilt also passed through his chest. Suppressing these conflicting emotions, he opened his mouth.

Thank you for everything, Suzushiro. I heard from the staff that Chidori and the other girl were also rescued safely. Im truly grateful.

Tsugumi bowed deeply as he said this. Suzushiro waved her hands in front of her chest, opening her mouth with a troubled look.

You dont need to thank me! Its only natural to help a friend in trouble!

But its true that Im grateful. .Uh, please tell Toono-san that I am grateful. Maybe there wont be another chance for me to meet her.

At least not on this matter.

As he thought about it, he lowered his eyes dejectedly. Tsugumi had a lot of questions for Toono about the memories he had recalled. Why did she know about Tsugumis past or memories? Depending on the answer, he might have to reconsider his future plans.

Now that he had remembered, he couldnt look away from the past.

Yeah. Ill let her know. Ah, by the way, I havent been able to see Chidori yet because of the tests. Do you want me to take you to the hospital room?

Suzushiro asked him that, but he quietly shook his head.

No, its okay. The doctor said that Chidoris consciousness hasnt come back yet. Ill wait patiently in the waiting room for the guide to come. Besides, I am not ready yet.

He still didnt know what kind of face he should make when he met Chidori. The desire to see her face to face and confirm her safety, and a deep sense of guilt that made him want to run away. All of these feelings were clamping down on his heart.

The current Chidori, who had lost her memory, probably wouldnt blame Tsugumi. But what if she regained her memory?

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Her gentle, soft eyes tinged with hatred and piercing him. A voice of resentment spewed out like sand. Calling him a liar and choking him. Tsugumi could imagine such a situation. Just thinking about it made his hands shake uncontrollably.

Even if they were not related by blood, Chidori would still be more important to him than anything else. Even without Gods words, even without the order to protect her, he would protect Chidori no matter what the cost. That was the one thing that would never change, no matter what.

Tsugumi-kun, are you all right? You dont look so good

Yeah, maybe Im a little tired from all the tests Ive been having. Oh, by the way, I wonder if my companion and the girl who was with me at the movie theater have already arrived at the hospital.

Towards Suzushiro, who asked that question with an uneasy look, Tsugumi felt bad, but he tried to cover it up and turned the subject away. He couldnt talk about this with his friends. Besides, even Suzushiro would probably be troubled by a confession of his sordid past.

The foreign man and the junior high school girl? Yes, they were here. The girls parents came to pick her up after visiting the other girl, so I think theyve already gone home. And, um, Azalea-san went away after he saw Chidori sleeping and had a difficult conversation with staff. I wonder what happened to him?

Hmmm? Well, Ill ask Azalea later.

He wondered what Azalea talked about with the staff, but he didnt have time to discuss it now.

Also, all the kidnappers have been properly caught. The government will investigate the background of the kidnappers, but Chidori-chan should be careful from now on. The kidnappers were able to detect the aptitude of MagicalGirls in some way. Whether its based on rumors, information, or some kind of witchcraft, its still dangerous for girls who dont have the strength to fight.

Thats right. Ill be sure to mention this to Chidori.

From now on, they must be wary not only of Demonic Beasts but also of fellow humans. Chidori, who was prone to getting into trouble, would need to be prepared for this. Tsugumi would move as much as he could, but there was always the possibility that, as in this case, she could be harmed while he wasnt looking. It was best for her to be careful.

Im going to go now. I have to make a quick stop at the government. Ah, and by the way, Tsugumi-kun.

Suzushiro, who approached him easily, gently wrapped her hands around Tsugumis cold hands and said with a serious look.

If you have any problems, Im here to help you. Dont worry about it alone. When Tsugumi-kun looks sad, it makes me sad too.

Suzushiro must have noticed a subtle change in Tsugumi. Even though Tsugumi thought he was acting like usual, he apparently couldnt hide the fact that he was feeling down.

But seeing Suzushiros sincerity made Tsugumi feel deep warmth in his heart. She was just straight up worried about her friend, Nanase Tsugumi. Not the nameless Tsugumi, not Hagakure Sakura but the life-size Tsugumi. He was very grateful for that.

Yes, thank you. Im really lucky to have a friend like Suzushiro.

When Tsugumi smiled and thanked her, Suzushiro smiled with satisfaction. Then Suzushiro let go of Tsugumis hand with a shy smile, waved her hand, and said, See you later! and ran down the hallway.

Staring at his right hand, which gradually warmed up, he muttered wryly.

Youre too good of a friend to me, who only lies, really.

Tsugumi looked down while mocking himself. Because Suzushiros straightforward kindness was a little too dazzling for the current Tsugumi.

The day she was taken to the hospital, Chidori woke up in the middle of the night on the day she was rescued.

She had a lingering sense of fatigue and a dull ache that lingered throughout her body. Her physical condition was not perfect, but as a result of forcing herself to move, it was probably on the lighter side.

Chidori looked around the hospital room with a foggy mind and saw a black mass just beside the bed. Staring in surprise, she saw Tsugumi sitting in a round chair, leaning against the wall, asleep.

Seeing that figure, Chidori finally breathed out a sigh of relief. She knew that she had made it home safely.

Chidori quietly slipped out of bed and approached the sleeping Tsugumi. The moonlight streaming in through the window faintly illuminated his sleeping face. His eyes were red, as if he had been crying.

She might have caused him a lot of worries. Chidori felt sorry and gently traced her finger around the red, swollen eye. Then, perhaps feeling an itch, Tsugumi let out a small Hmm and loosely lifted his eyelids. The eyes, which seemed to be in a slumber, stared at Chidori.

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Chidori? Huh!

Tsugumis eyes widened in surprise, and he twisted and fell from his chair timidly. Seeing him like that, Chidori couldnt take it anymore and giggled.

You dont have to be so surprised.

Youre awake. Um, are you feeling all right now?

Tsugumi asked Chidori with a clumsy laugh as if the spot where it hit the floor was painful.

Yeah. I feel a little sluggish, but theres no other problem.

I see. Really, thats good. The doctor said that the wound is not too deep and the drug is something that will wear off soon, but I was still worried.

Seeing Tsugumi who said so with relief as he sat on the floor, Chidori was filled with guilts,

Im sorry. If only I had been more careful, none of this would have happened. Besides, Ive caused so much trouble for so many people.

The kidnapping could have been prevented if only Chidori had taken proper action in the first place. She wouldnt have bothered the government or the busy Jukka. And Tsugumi wouldnt have any reason to cry.

As Chidori was feeling down, Tsugumi opened his mouth with a wry smile.

No, its not Chidoris fault. Come on, lets go back to bed. Im sure youll be busy tomorrow with interviews and all that, so you should get some rest while you can.

But No, youre right. As Tsugumi said, Ill rest now.

When Tsugumi told her it wasnt bad, she tried to deny it hesitantly, but then she kept her mouth shut and agreed with Tsugumi. If they discussed this matter now, they most likely wouldnt get an answer. Tsugumi seemed to be tired, too, so it would be better for them to take the rest of the day off.

Hey, how long have you been sitting there?

Chidori said, holding out her hand to Tsugumi, who was still sitting on the floor. But Tsugumi stared at her hand, looked away for a moment with a frightened look, and smiled as if to hide it.

Im heavy, and Chidori cant support me. Besides, I can even stand up by myself

Before he could finish his sentence, Chidori grabbed his hand and pulled him to his feet. Just like that, she let Tsugumi stand up, and the two of them fall on the bed together with too much momentum.

Whoa, hey, Chidori, what are you doing

Hey, what are you so afraid of, Tsugumi?

Hastily clinging to Tsugumi who was trying to retreat on top of her, Chidori said in a quiet voice.

I somehow know that Tsugumi has been hiding something from me for some time. It doesnt matter. Im sure even family members have one or two things they dont want to tell. But I definitely dont want you to distance yourself from me like that. Because I only have Tsugumi

Saying this, Chidori put a lot of strength into her arm that gripped Tsugumi. She didnt know what Tsugumi was worried about, what he was afraid of. But only in front of her, she wanted him to be his usual self.

Tsugumis eyes widened in confusion, then he rested his head on Chidoris shoulder and spoke in a quiet voice.

Chidori, what would you do if I told you that I wanted to leave home and live on my own?

The words, spoken as if in penitence, shook Chidori to the core. Hearing her heart beating fast, Chidori opened her trembling lips.

Why? Is there a reason?

Thats I just thought it would be better that way.

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Tsugumi mumbled and slurred his words.

Maybe Tsugumi has recalled something from the past?

This was what Chidori feared the most. Once the family ties were gone, there would be nothing to bind him to Chidori. As long as Sakura-oneechan actually existed, Chidori, who had no proof that she was his sister, couldnt stay by his side. Even more so If Tsugumi remembered the truth.

But that was not a reason to support him living alone.

Im against it. I will never allow that.

Shifting her body on the hospital bed, facing him, she gripped his head with both hands and looked firmly into his face. The bright moonlight shone on Tsugumis anxious face.

For now, this is the happiest moment. Im so happy that youre with me, that we can spend every day laughing. Even if Tsugumi and I arent really brother and sister, that feeling wont change Because weve been living together as a family all this time. Are those ten years so easy for you? Youve come to hate being with me that much ?

Thats not it! Theres no way I hate you But Chidori will surely regret being with me someday. Thats what Im helplessly afraid of.

With a pained expression on his face, Tsugumi told her this, pouring out his feelings. Chidori looked at him and screamed in her heart.

Tsugumi was remembering something. That was probably why he was trying to get away from Chidori in this way.

She didnt think she wanted to get her past memories back. She was curious about what Tsugumi remembered, but she was fine with it as long as Tsugumi didnt tell her about it. Because she loved the happy present more than the past, which she could never get back. Why couldnt he understand that?

I dont know what youre worried about, but you worry too much. Theres no way Id hate Tsugumi.

But

Even if I end up regretting it, its my own decision. I swear I wont blame Tsugumi. Then you dont have to worry about anything, right?

Saying that, Chidori smiled. She thought it was a bit aggressive, but she had to say this much to convince Tsugumi.

Tsugumi, on the other hand, squinted his eyes as if he were looking at something dazzling and laughed helplessly.

Youre a fool, Chidori. Youre really terrible.

I cant believe you wont even allow me to run away. He mouthed this in a small voice, stroked Chidoris head with a giggle, and then slowly got up from the bed.

Ill put living alone on hold for now. Im going to move to the nap room. I cant sleep in a chair all the time. You should go to bed soon, too, Chidori.

Oh, I have a big bed, we should sleep together.

When Chidori teasingly said this, Tsugumi opened his mouth with an exasperated look.

Dont say weird things. Regardless of when we were in elementary school, we havent done that once since weve grown up.

Im just kidding. Good night, Tsugumi. Ill see you tomorrow. If I oversleep, Id appreciate it if you wake me up.

Chidori gave a small wave of her hand while implicitly promising to come to see him first thing in the morning. Tsugumi let out a loud sigh and with just a slight smile of relief, he walked out of the hospital room.

Now alone, Chidori collapsed onto her bed and looked up at the ceiling in a daze.

Why cant anything stay the same? I dont want to change.

Muttering these words, she slowly closed her eyes. Tsugumis feelings and Chidoris feelings. The two of them still cared for each other, but why wasnt this going well?

Thinking of such things, Chidori drifted off to sleep. Unbeknown to her, she would wake up in the morning getting scolded by Tsugumi for not putting the futon over her head and going back to sleep.

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Chidori, who had lived with a misplaced button called memory, was unable to remember the truth and understand Tsugumis anguish, and Tsugumi, who was frightened of the future someday, was unable to understand Chidoris desire for the continuation of the status quo. The pathetic difference between them could only lead to a tragedy.