Karen slipped out of bed and put on her dressing gown. 'Come downstairs with Mummy, darling,' she said, taking Peter's hand and picking up the pillowcase. 'We'll leave grumpy old Daddy to sleep.'

When all the presents were opened, she left Peter playing with his new toys in the living room and went into the kitchen to make a pot of tea. Adrey was already up, having risen early to make what she called kerststol, which turned out to be some kind of fruit loaf traditionally eaten at Christmas for breakfast.

'Peter loves his new teddy,' Karen told her. 'It looks expensive. You really shouldn't have.'

Adrey turned with a smile. 'He's such a good little boy. I wanted to give him something nice for Sinterklaas.' She reached into the pocket of her dressing gown and produced a small, brightly wrapped parcel. 'I get this for you too. You and Simon have been so kind and welcoming.'

Karen was surprised. Opening the package, she found a tiny brooch in the shape of a Dutch clog, encrusted with crystals. 'Oh, Adrey, how sweet,' she said. 'It'll look great on my black dress. Thank you so much. There's a little something from Simon and me under the tree. We'll be opening those later.'

Putting the kettle on, she thought how pretty Adrey was. In her red dressing gown and with her fresh complexion and her long blonde hair hanging down her back in a thick plait, she looked like a Christmas angel. Karen turned and gave her a quick hug. 'I know you must be missing your family today,' she said. 'And you must feel free to telephone them.'

'Thank you, Karen. I would like to do that very much.'

The kitchen door opened to admit Simon in his old navy dressing gown. His hair tousled and his jaw dark with stubble, he still looked grumpy. Glancing at the two women he enquired, 'Any tea going?'

'I'm just making it,' Karen said, reaching for the teapot.

Adrey touched Karen's arm. 'I go now to make the telephone call to my family, if it is permitted?'

'Of course, help yourself and take as long as you like,' Karen added.

'Thank you. Then I take Peter upstairs to wash and dress.'

Simon slumped at the table. 'Her family does live in Holland, you know,' he growled.

'I am aware of that.'

'Now you've given her carte blanche she'll probably be on the b.l.o.o.d.y phone all morning.'

'No she won't. She's not the type to take advantage.' Karen poured two cups of tea. 'Cut the poor girl some slack, Simon. This is her first Christmas away from home.'

Simon looked at the loaf, cooling on a wire rack on the worktop. 'What's that thing?'

'It's called kerststol. Adrey got up early specially to make it. It's a kind of fruit loaf. They eat it for breakfast in Holland at Christmas.'

Simon sniffed. 'Do they? Well, it smells OK anyway.'

'I'm going to put the turkey on in a minute. If you want, you can help with the vegetables.'

He snorted. 'No way. You know I'm all thumbs when it comes to domestic stuff.'

'All right, then, if Adrey is going to help me, you can take Peter to the park after breakfast.'

When everyone else was upstairs getting dressed, Karen took the telephone into the kitchen and dialled Susan's number.

'Mum it's not too late to change your mind,' she said. 'There'll be plenty for all of us including your friend.'

'That's perfectly all right,' Susan said. 'I have everything ready here. Ted and I are going to have a lovely day, thank you.'

'Oh, Mum, you're not still cross, are you? You know I'm only thinking of you.'

'I don't think that's quite true, Karen, but please don't worry. Maybe I'll see you sometime in the New Year.'

'Please, Mum, don't be like that,' Karen begged. 'Look, why don't you come round for a drink tomorrow bring Ted too. I could make a brunch with some of the leftovers.'

'I'll eat my own leftovers if it's all the same to you,' Susan said. 'I'm not cross, Karen, just a little disappointed by your att.i.tude. But don't worry. I'm perfectly all right and looking forward to having someone to cook for again.'

'But, Mum ...'

'No, I'm not being awkward, I mean it, Karen, I'm fine. Ted and I are going to have a really nice Christmas and I hope you do too. Goodbye, dear. Give my love to Simon and little Peter.'

'Oh thank you for the presents, Mum.'

'I'm glad you liked them. Thank you for yours. The scarf will go beautifully with my new coat. Happy Christmas, dear.'

'Happy Christmas, Mum.' Karen said faintly. There was a lump in her throat as she switched the phone off. She hated falling out with her mother. Sometimes lately it seemed that she couldn't do right for doing wrong.

Chapter Eleven.

Ted arrived on the dot of twelve. Susan answered his ring on the entry-phone and pressed the b.u.t.ton that released the main door to the flats. Ripping off her ap.r.o.n, she took a quick look in the hall mirror to check that her newly set hair was still in place.

When she opened the door she found him beaming outside, a huge bunch of chrysanthemums in one hand and a carrier bag containing a bottle of sherry and another of champagne in the other. He handed both to her. Susan blushed with pleasure.

'Oh, Ted, how thoughtful. But you really shouldn't have.'

'Not at all, my dear. It's so good of you to invite me.' He took off his overcoat and hung it on one of the pegs inside the door. Susan saw that he wore his best dark-grey suit with a pristine white shirt and tasteful blue tie. She thought he looked very handsome.

'Happy Christmas, Ted,' she said. 'Come through and make yourself comfortable. Everything's almost ready so we can have a drink and relax for half an hour.'

'Oh, but I thought I was going to help.'

Susan smiled. 'It's all right. I haven't been up since dawn. I did most of the preparation yesterday afternoon.'

Ted followed her through to the living room and looked around appreciatively while Susan fetched gla.s.ses and poured the sherry. A cosy fire was burning in the hearth and in the centre of the room, the table was laid with her best gla.s.s and cutlery, set off by red napkins and crackers by each place setting. A Christmas tree stood in one corner, its coloured lights twinkling, and holly was draped around the mirror above the fireplace. There were red candles on the mantelpiece, their flickering flames reflected in the mirror.

'It all looks very festive,' he said, rubbing his hands and holding them out to the fire. 'Nice and warm too.' Susan handed him a gla.s.s of sherry.

'Here's to a happy Christmas,' she said.

Lunch was a great success. It was some years since Susan had cooked Christmas dinner for a man and she had loved every minute of it. Her reward was seeing him clear his plate with obvious relish.

'I'd forgotten how good home-cooked food tasted,' he said, pushing his chair back from the table and sighing. 'I don't think I'll need to eat again for at least a week!'

Susan laughed. 'I'm sure you will,' she said. 'I hope so anyway. I've got Christmas cake and mince pies lined up for later on.'

He smiled almost impishly. 'Oh well, I suppose I'll have to force them down.'

He insisted on helping her with the washing-up and then they settled down to see the Queen's speech on TV. When it was over, Ted went out into the hall and came back with a small package which he handed to her.

'Just a little token of my appreciation,' he said almost shyly.

Susan blushed. 'Oh, Ted, you shouldn't have done this. I haven't got you anything.'

'Indeed you have,' he said stoutly. 'This is the best Christmas Day I've spent for years. All the work and the planning you've put into it makes my little offering look meagre. Please open it and see if you like it. If not, please feel free to change it.'

Somewhat fl.u.s.tered, Susan quickly unwrapped the gift. Inside a black velvet box she found a single crystal threaded onto a fine gold chain. In the light it glittered and flashed like a diamond. She took it out of the box and held it up.

'Oh, Ted. It's beautiful!' Standing in front of the mirror she held it out to him. 'Will you fasten it for me?'

He clipped the chain around her neck and the crystal lay winking in the light at the base of her throat. She looked up at him with shining eyes.

'Thank you,' she said. 'It's a long time since anyone gave me anything as nice.' She stood on tiptoe to kiss his cheek but his hands cupped her face, turning it gently to kiss her lips.

For a moment his eyes held hers then he said softly, 'I'm so happy that I found the courage to speak to you that day on the bus, Susan.'

She smiled. 'So am I, Ted. And this is the nicest Christmas I've had for many a day too.'

'I can't wait for the next few weeks to pa.s.s so that we can start working on the allotments together.'

'Neither can I.'

They sat down side by side on the settee in front of the fire and Ted's hand found hers, squeezing it lightly. 'I can't remember when I've felt so happy,' he said.

'Neither can I.' For a moment they looked into the firelight together then Susan said, 'Tell me about your wife, Ted. Meg, wasn't it?'

His brow clouded. 'I'm afraid it wasn't the happiest of marriages,' he said. 'If you don't mind, I'd rather not talk about it at the moment. Let's not spoil a perfect day.' He smiled at her and squeezed her hand. 'What about you? All I know is that you have two daughters. I take it your marriage was happy.'

She nodded. 'Frank was a good man. Louise is my stepdaughter. Frank's wife walked out on them both when Louise was a toddler. When he and I married she was ten and she resented me dreadfully thought I'd stolen her beloved dad away, which wasn't the case at all. I tried my best but nothing seemed to work and I'm afraid she still sees me as an outsider.'

'But you have your own daughter.'

'Yes. Karen made up for a lot, but she has her own family now and lately even she seems to be drifting away from me.' She looked at him. 'I suppose we've always been what they call a dysfunctional family.'

'Sometimes I wonder if there's any other kind,' Ted said with a wry smile. 'Do you know, I think it's time to open that bottle of champagne. I can't think of a better occasion.'

Chapter Twelve.

We were three days into the New Year when the rehearsal schedule arrived. I rang Mark as soon as I'd opened it and scanned through.

'It doesn't look very intensive,' I said. 'Only two rehearsals a week and it seems we're still in that draughty old hall in Stoke Newington.'

'So I see,' Mark replied. 'Still, at least things are moving. In the enclosed letter, Paul mentions extra sessions for the music and some with a ch.o.r.eographer. How's your dancing?'

I laughed. 'I think I can hoof it with the best.'

'I'm sure you remember my galumphing efforts. Let's hope Wickham doesn't have anything too energetic to do.'

'I see the first one is the day after tomorrow,' I said, looking at the schedule. 'How are you getting on with the lines?'

'Not too bad, how about you?'

'Oh, OK.' I was remembering Di's cool response when I'd asked her to test me. She'd treated the request as though I were some tiresome kid rehearsing for the school play. No one would ever have thought she'd once longed to become an actress herself. It was more the kind of reaction I'd have expected from Karen.

'See you on Wednesday, then,' Mark was saying.

'What? Oh yes, fine.'

Since Di had returned from her Christmas break, she'd been a bit distant. Apparently the engagement party had gone well and she'd had a great time with her family, but I could tell there was something brewing.

To tell the truth I was a bit jealous of Di's happy family life. I'd had a card from Karen and Simon and one from Susan, but no presents and certainly no invitations to visit or enquiries about the new show. I know it was partly my own fault. The trick I played on Karen last time I was staying with her was pretty much over the top, but there is something about Karen that stirs up the devil in me. One look at that sanctimonious, smug little face and I can't help myself. I realize now that what I did could have had disastrous consequences. I just hadn't thought it through and she was right to be angry with me. Nevertheless it hurt to be so completely excluded, especially at Christmas. Now that Dad has gone, I feel I have no one who really gives a d.a.m.n about me.

Inevitably my thoughts turned again to my mother. I wondered if she regretted what she'd done just as I did. Was she lonely? Maybe she had married again. I could have half-siblings I didn't know about; a whole new family! The thought excited me and I promised myself that I would look into ways of finding her again just as soon as the rehearsals had got underway.

I was right about Di having a bee in her bonnet. When she got in from work that evening, I showed her the schedule that Paul had sent but as she set about unpacking her briefcase, I could see that there was something else on her mind. Eventually she stopped me in mid-sentence.

'Lou look, can we just sit down a minute? There's something I need to tell you.'

My heart sank. I could tell from her face that whatever it was, it wasn't going to be to my advantage. 'OK, Di, what's on your mind?' I asked. 'I've been trying really hard to keep the place tidy and I'm not behind with my share of the rent, am I?'

'No, nothing like that.' She took a deep breath. 'It's just that well, while I was at home this time I met up with an old flame of mine again. Mike and I used to go out together when we were teenagers but we drifted apart when I came up to London to drama school and he went off to study law. He married someone else during that time but they divorced last year.' She glanced at me. 'We found we still liked each other quite a lot actually, the old spark was still there. Over the holiday we met a few times. Mike has just landed himself a fabulous job up here with a law firm. He said he was going to look me up when he started ask me to help him find a place to live, so it was lucky our meeting again.' She glanced at me again. 'So I thought I said ...'

'You told him not to bother looking because he could move in with you,' I completed the sentence for her. I laughed at her expression. 'Christ, Di, I thought you were never going to spit it out. You could have said it all in a few words: 'I've met an old boyfriend and we still turn each other on so we're going to move in together oh, and by the way, I want you to move out.'

She had the grace to wince. 'You make me sound like a ...'

'I make you sound like what you are,' I told her. 'A good friend who's put up with me for far too long. I know I've outstayed my welcome by a mile. It's high time I was out of your hair. Good luck with the renewed relationship, Di. When do you want me to leave?'

She looked so relieved that I thought she might faint. 'It's very good of you to take it so well,' she said. 'There's really no hurry about leaving. Where will you go?'

'Oh, don't worry about me,' I said lightly. 'I've got some contacts. I'll be fine.' Secretly, I have to admit that I'd never have been so generous if it hadn't been for Mark. I felt confident that he'd be more than delighted to have me move into the apartment with him. As for me, I was thrilled. The s.e.x was fantastic and I wouldn't have to pay any rent.

The first rehearsal was a bit of a shambles. Paul brought this guy along who he said was an experienced director. He introduced him as Marvin Nash. Neither Mark nor I had ever heard of him. Not that either of us was that clued up about West End directors but he was certainly no Cameron Mackintosh, anyone could see that. When we were finally dismissed, Mark and I went along to the Prince of Wales, the same pub we'd lunched at before, and sat down with stiff drinks to pool our opinions.

'I daresay it'll all come together once we get the music and ch.o.r.eography sorted,' Mark said optimistically.

I shrugged. 'I hope you're right. They're like a bunch of amateurs, and that Carla is the worst. G.o.d only knows what her singing voice is like.'