Whenever he mentioned the subject Germinie asked him innumerable questions. She wanted to know everything that was necessary to start in business. She made him tell her the names of the tools and appurtenances, give her an idea of their prices and where they could be bought. She questioned him as to his trade and the details of his work so inquisitively and persistently that Jupillon lost his patience at last and said to her:
"What's all this to you? The work sickens me enough now; don't mention it to me!"
One Sunday she walked toward Montmartre with him. Instead of taking Rue Frochot she turned into Rue Pigalle.
"Why, this ain't the way, is it?" said Jupillon.
"I know what I'm about," said she, "come on."
She had taken his arm, and she walked on, turning her head slightly away from him so that he could not see what was taking place on her face.
Half way along Rue Fontaine Saint-Georges, she halted abruptly in front of two windows on the ground floor of a house, and said to him: "Look!"
She was trembling with joy.
Jupillon looked; he saw between the two windows, on a glistening copper plate:
_Magasin de Ganterie._
JUPILLON.
He saw white curtains at the first window. Through the gla.s.s in the other he saw pigeon-holes and boxes, and, near the window, the little glover's cutting board, with the great shears, the jar for clippings, and the knife to make holes in the skins in order to stretch them.
"The concierge has your key," she said.
They entered the first room, the shop.
She at once set about showing him everything. She opened the boxes and laughed. Then she pushed open the door into the other room. "There, you won't be stifled there as you are in the loft at your mother's. Do you like it? Oh! it isn't handsome, but it's clean. I'd have liked to give you mahogany. Do you like that little rug by the bed? And the paper--I didn't think of that----" She put a receipt for the rent in his hand.
"See! this is for six months. Dame! you must go to work right off and earn some money. The few sous I had laid by are all gone. Oh! let me sit down. You look so pleased--it gives me a turn--it makes my head spin. I haven't any legs."
And she sank into a chair. Jupillon stooped over her to kiss her.
"Ah! yes, they're not there any longer," she said, seeing that he was looking for her earrings. "They've gone like my rings. D'ye see, all gone----"
And she showed him her hands, bare of the paltry gems she had worked so long to buy.
"They all went for the easy-chair, you see--but it's all horsehair."
As Jupillon stood in front of her with an embarra.s.sed air, as if he were trying to find words with which to thank her, she continued:
"Why, you're a funny fellow. What's the matter with you? Ah! it's on that account, is it?" And she pointed to the bedroom. "You're a stupid!
I love you, don't I? Well then?"
Germinie said the words simply, as the heart says sublime things.
XIX
She became _enceinte_.
At first she doubted, she dared not believe it. But when she was certain of the fact, she was filled with immeasurable joy, a joy that overflowed her heart. Her happiness was so great and so overpowering that it stifled at a single stroke the anguish, the fear, the inward trembling that ordinarily disturb the maternity of unmarried women and poisons their antic.i.p.ations of childbirth, the divine hope that lives and moves within them. The thought of the scandal caused by the discovery of her _liaison_, of the outcry in the quarter, the idea of the abominable thing that had always made her think of suicide: dishonor,--even the fear of being detected by mademoiselle and dismissed by her--nothing of all this could cast a shadow on her felicity. The child that she expected allowed her to see nothing but it, as if she had it already in her arms before her; and, hardly attempting to conceal her condition, she bore her woman's shame almost proudly through the streets, exulting and radiant in the thought that she was to be a mother.
She was unhappy only because she had spent all her savings, and was not only without money but had been paid several months' wages in advance by her mistress. She bitterly deplored having to receive her child in a poor way. Often, as she pa.s.sed through Rue Saint-Lazare, she would stop in front of a linen-draper's, in whose windows were displayed stores of rich baby-linen. She would devour with her eyes the pretty, dainty flowered garments, the pique bibs, the long short-waisted dresses trimmed with English embroidery, the whole doll-like cherub's costume. A terrible longing,--the longing of a pregnant woman,--to break the gla.s.s and steal it all, would come upon her: the clerks standing behind the display framework became accustomed to seeing her take up her station there and would laughingly point her out to one another.
Again, at intervals, amid the happiness that overflowed her heart, amid the ecstasy that exalted her being, another disturbing thought pa.s.sed through her mind. She would ask herself how the father would welcome his child. Two or three times she had attempted to tell him of her condition but had not dared. At last, one day, seeing that his face wore the expression she had awaited so long as a preliminary to telling him everything, an expression in which there was a touch of affection, she confessed to him, blushing hotly and as if asking his forgiveness, what it was that made her so happy.
"That's all imagination!" said Jupillon.
And when she had a.s.sured him that it was not imagination and that she was positively five months advanced in pregnancy: "Just my luck!" the young man rejoined. "Thanks!" And he swore. "Would you mind telling me who's going to feed the sparrow?"
"Oh! never you fear! it sha'n't suffer, I'll look out for that. And then it'll be so pretty! Don't be afraid, no one shall know anything about it. I'll fix myself up. See! the last part of the time I'll walk like this, with my head back--I won't wear any petticoats, and I'll pull myself in--you'll see! n.o.body shall notice anything, I tell you. Just think of it! a little child of our own!"
"Well, as long as it's so, it's so, eh?" said the young man.
"Say," ventured Germinie, timidly, "suppose you should tell your mother?"
"Ma? Oh! no, I rather think not. You must lie in first. After that we'll take the brat to the house. It will give her a start, and perhaps she'll consent without meaning to."
XX
Twelfth Night arrived. It was the day on which Mademoiselle de Varandeuil gave a grand dinner-party regularly every year. She invited all the children of her own family or her old friends' families, great and small. The small suite would hardly hold them all. They were obliged to put part of the furniture on the landing, and a table was set in each of the two rooms which formed mademoiselle's whole suite. For the children, that day was a great festival to which they looked forward for a week. They came running up the stairway behind the pastry-cook's men.
At table they ate too much without being scolded. At night, they were unwilling to go to bed, they climbed on the chairs and made a racket that always gave Mademoiselle de Varandeuil a sick headache the next day; but she bore them no grudge therefor: she had had the full enjoyment of a genuine grandmother's fete, in listening to them, looking at them, tying around their necks the white napkins that made them look so rosy. And not for anything in the world would she have failed to give this dinner-party, which filled her old maid's apartments with the fair-haired little imps of Satan, and brought thither, in a single day, an atmosphere of activity and youth and laughter that lasted a whole year.
Germinie was preparing the dinner. She was whipping cream in an earthen bowl on her knees, when suddenly she felt the first pains. She looked at her face in the bit of a broken mirror that she had above her kitchen dresser, and saw that she was pale. She went down to Adele: "Give me your mistress's rouge," she said. And she put some on her cheeks. Then she went up again, and, refusing to listen to the voice of her suffering, finished cooking the dinner. It had to be served, and she served it. At dessert, she leaned against the furniture and grasped the backs of chairs as she pa.s.sed the plates, hiding her torture with the ghastly set smile of people whose entrails are writhing.
"How's this, are you sick?" said her mistress, looking sharply at her.
"Yes, mademoiselle, a little--it may be the charcoal or the hot kitchen."
"Go to bed--we don't need you any more, and you can clean up to-morrow."
She went down to Adele once more.
"It's come," she said; "call a cab quick. It was Rue de la Huchette where you said your midwife lives, wasn't it? opposite a copper planer's? Haven't you a pen and paper?"
And she sat down to write a line to her mistress. She told her that she was too ill to work, that she had gone to the hospital, but would not tell her where, because she would fatigue herself coming to see her; that she would come back within a week.
"There you are!" said Adele, all out of breath, giving her the number of the cab.
"I can stay there," said Germinie; "not a word to mademoiselle. That's all. Swear you won't say a word to her!"