William gave us both a back-me-up-here look. "This was serious, wasn't it?"

I started to agree when Feather cut in with, "I already told you, I've been bitten much harder before. It's no big deal."

No she hadn't, and everyone in this room, including her, knew it. Izzy shifted uncomfortably in the beanbag. I probably should have been embarra.s.sed for Feather, as well, but my eyes were glued to the two of them like I was watching a soap opera.

"Yeah," William said, clearly hurt. "What you didn't say was how many times."

"A few," she said, shrugging into her coat. "Not that it's any of your business."

"I'm your boyfriend."

"Not my keeper."

Oh, ouch. I managed to tear my eyes away from the hurt expression on William's face.

"Fine," he said. "If that's the way you want it."

"That's the way itis , William." And, with a clatter of rubber soles on stairs, she left.

William let her go. His shoulders slumped, and he pinched the s.p.a.ce between his eyes. He'd apparently left his gla.s.ses in the same place as most of his clothes.

To Izzy and me, he said, "I don't understand it. Why would she purposely put herself into situations like this, like what happened tonight? Three hours ago I didn't even know there were vampires. Now I find out my girlfriend's addicted to them? It's too much, man."

I didn't want to break it to William that Feather probably had one specific "master" she saw on a regular basis. She probably drove to Minneapolis or Chicago or Milwaukee to see the guy... or gal. I hadn't heard that Madison had a resident vamp. Of course, now we had two.

Izzy nodded her head. "I hear you, brother."

"She says she pays for it sometimes."

I glanced up at that. Vampires were ultra-possessive of their ghouls. They kept a kind of revolving harem, bound together in secrecy and need. At least, Parrish had. Another reason dating him had been awkward to say the least.

"Who would pay forthat ?" Izzy asked, looking at the spot on the floor where the majority of the blood had been.

"A lot of people," I said, considering it. "Tonight... Sebastian was unusually harsh. A little blood can sustain a vampire for quite a while. Sebastian was wounded. Normally, they don't go for the kill like that."

n.o.body said anything for a while.

With a sweeping glance, William took in all of our cleaning. His gaze lingered on the stub of the arrow, as if trying to will himself to remember what had happened here. "You guys worked hard. Looks nice."

"Thanks," I said.

Izzy stood up and pulled at the hem of her blue b.u.t.ton-down shirt. Black stains made a Rorschach pattern on the cloth. "My turn for the shower."

"Borrow anything that catches your fancy in my closet," I offered, though I wondered if any of it would fit. Izzy was several inches taller and a few sizes thinner than me. After Izzy disappeared into the bathroom, William and I exchanged a long look. He ran his fingers through his hair, then sauntered over to sit beside me on the couch.

"So, you're dating this guy... this vampire?"

Was I? I had thought so, but now I had trouble envisioning a scenario where I really wanted to see Sebastian again, romantically speaking. I shook my head mutely. "I was."

"He's the guy you played hooky for though, right?" I nodded, but William barely registered my response before going on to his next thought. "Wait. That was this morning. Like, daylight. Vampires can go out in the daytime? That blows." "Not all of them."

"Well, thank Father Odin for that."

It took me a second to pa.r.s.e out what he'd said. "Aren't you a Druid now?"

"f.u.c.k," he muttered. "I meant, Oak and Ash, or something like that."

I started to stifle a laugh but then decided I needed one, even if it was at William's expense. He smiled along. "Sorry," I said, with a shake of my head. "It's been a long day."

"Yeah," he said, leaning back into the couch. "I was going to see if you guys wanted to hit an IHOP or something, but you look beat."

And I wasn't really in company mood anymore. I understood his desire to debrief, however. "Maybe Izzy would be up for it."

"Yeah," he said. With a lascivious wiggle of his eyebrows, he c.o.c.ked his head in the direction of the sound of the shower and added, "You think I should go ask her?"

I smiled, but I felt suddenly, inexplicably sad. Maybe it was the brave show of camaraderie William attempted, especially considering his girlfriend had all but dumped him five minutes ago. Or perhaps it was regret-regret that I was pushing away friends who deserved better.

"Let's ask her together when she comes out," I told William. "I've changed my mind. I feel restless. I need to go out."

"Cool," William said.

I nodded. It would be good to get out of this apartment for a while. I was fairly certain the Vatican wouldn't be back tonight, at least. Despite my conviction, I just didn't want to stay here at this moment.

The whole place felt violated, unsafe.

Barney came out of hiding to twine around William's feet. He reached down to scratch her on the flat s.p.a.ce between her ears. She purred loudly and bonked her head against his hand.

Izzy emerged a few minutes later wearing my black bustier. "Honey, you have the closet of a s.l.u.t," she said, making all of us laugh.

After William explained our plan and Izzy dug out something more decent to wear, I took my turn in the shower. I changed into a new pair of jeans and a sage-green shirt. I didn't have the energy to work on being pretty. Grabbing the change off my dresser, I dug through my junk drawer until I found a pen and some paper. I wrote a quick note to Parrish. I didn't want him to freak when he came in, smelled the blood, and saw the arrow and bullet holes. He might think I was dead. Or fled again. So I just wrote, "Don't worry. I'll be back."

I started to sign it "Meadow Spring." I stopped when I realized what I was doing. Then it occurred to me that using my Craft name might be enough of a hint to Parrish to keep an eye out for Vatican agents.

It was worth a shot. "Got a new roomie?" Izzy's voice startled me.

"A friend from Minneapolis is crashing on my couch." I resisted the urge to cover the note guiltily, and, instead, grabbed a piece of tape to post it on my apartment door.

"Hmmm."

She sounded suspicious, but she waited until we were all in her car before dropping the bomb. "How did your boyfriend end up stuck on the wall, Garnet? s.e.x games gone awry?"

I sat in the backseat. I could see Izzy watching me in the rearview.

William looked shocked. "Jesus, Izzy," he said.

She turned down McKinley Drive. Streetlamps illuminated the lakesh.o.r.e. In the darkness the water appeared black, reminding me of blood.

"The Order of Eustace," I said, not caring how fantastical or crazy the whole thing sounded. After all, both of them had met a vampire for the first time tonight. Finding out about a secret Catholic Witch-hunting order wasn't going to be that big of a stretch. "They take very seriously the verse in Exodus about not suffering a Witch to live. They're after Sebastian."

I left out the part about the grimoire for now. I wanted to see how Izzy and William would react to this information first.

"They hunt vampires?" William asked, turning in his seat so he could face me. He'd put on his gla.s.ses, and he was the only one of us who hadn't had to change. "The Pope has vampire hunters?"

"Witch hunters," I corrected. "Sebastian is also a Witch." In fact, I imagined that the fact that the Order had to rely on their "source" for information on vampires was the only reason I was alive. They seemed scattershot in their approach to Sebastian, like they were operating on the fly. I think Sebastian might have been right: they were out of their league when dealing with him.

It worried me that the real estate agent hadn't been part of Leader Guy's posse. For some reason, she scared me more than the others.

"Really? A vampire can also be a Witch?" William frowned. "Being dead doesn't really jive with Wicca, does it? It's not very life-affirming to suck people's blood, is it?"

I wasn't in the mood to give William a Pagan 101 cla.s.s.

Izzy said nothing, just toyed with the cross she wore around her neck. I'd known she was Christian, but I suddenly wondered what denomination. She had always been so cool and open about my magic that I'd figured her for Unitarian.

"There's other kinds of magic besides Wicca," I said.

William nodded, thinking about this. "Are all vampires Witches?"

"No, William, I don't think so," I said. "Sebastian is definitely unusual. That's why the Vatican is after him." That much was certainly true, though they clearly wanted his spell. It occurred to me to wonderwhy the Order wanted Sebastian's grimoire so d.a.m.n much. What were they planning on doing with it?

"They might not be Witches, but they must all be magical," William was saying. "Feather said that was part of their appeal."

"She's just into the pain," I said, aware that I wasn't being entirely fair.

William's face crumpled slightly. "Yeah," he said. "I suppose that's true. Explains some things, actually."

I didn't want to know any more about William's s.e.x life, so I asked, "Are you okay? Are you going to see her again?"

William shrugged and turned back toward the front. "I don't know. No offense, Garnet, but I find all this vampire s.h.i.t hard to take. I've been struggling my whole life to find true magic, and the first supernatural thing I encounter is, well, not something I want to emulate, let's just say. Jesus."

He fell silent, clearly lost in his own thoughts. Izzy chewed her lip and pretended to watch the road.

Though it was probably only about eleven thirty or so, the streets were pretty deserted. Izzy's car was a newish steel-gray Toyota. The detritus of her life lay scattered on the seat and the floorboards. Bill stubs, discarded sweaters, magazines, one blue sequined shoe, and an unopened case of soda. There was nothing dirty-no sticky empty cans or wadded-up fast-food containers-just clutter.

"Is any of the good stuff true?" William said absently. "It just seems unfair, you know? Vampires.

Zombies. Killer monks. How about faeries or tree nymphs or angels? Tell me we have those, too."

You wouldn't want to meet a real angel in a dark alley, I thought but didn't say. "Sure," I lied.

"There's good stuff."

"Magic works, right? Otherwise the Pope wouldn't want it suppressed."

"Right," I said, and that, at least, was true. "They're afraid of our power. Always have been."

"The Burning Times. Right," William said, referencing the era when the Inquisition burned thousands of Witches-or those just accused of Witchcraft-at the stake. "Well, I guess that's something."

Izzy, who had remained silent all this time, looked at me through the rearview again. "You haven't told us all of it. If this Order or whatever you call it is after Sebastian, they did a p.i.s.s-poor job of it, especially considering they had him nailed to the wall. How did you manage to get away? Or are they just really bad at their jobs?"

I couldn't look at her when I lied. "I don't know."

Izzy wasn't buying any of it. "Why you keeping the truth from us, girl? We risked our lives to help your boyfriend out, and you won't even tell us the whole d.a.m.n story."

She was right. I had put them at risk. I knew how hungry Sebastian was when I brought them to my apartment, but I didn't warn them; I didn't even really explain the danger.

"Okay," I said. "The Order left us alone because they were scared of me." Then I told them everything.

Izzy drove aimlessly through the streets of Madison as I talked. I explained meeting Sebastian, my suspicions about the real estate agent, the grimoire, Lilith, Parrish... everything. They sat quietly through the whole thing, never even interrupting with questions when I mentioned I'd run into agents before, in Minneapolis. It was spooky, honestly, especially William's silence. I began to wonder if I'd finally given him too much information and his brain had simply checked out, gone: tilt.

"Uh," I said, after a moment of silence had elapsed. "So, what do you think?"

Izzy just shook her head. William had removed his gla.s.ses and was rubbing the bridge of his nose again.

"s.h.i.t, Garnet," Izzy said. "Don't you think one vampire boyfriend is enough?"

"Parrish and I are exes."

"Ri-ight." She didn't sound convinced. She pulled the Toyota into a parking spot in front of an IHOP. It was late, but they were still open, catering to the post-bar rush.

"So, there really are G.o.ddesses?" William's voice was quiet. "Again, though, with the dark and scary.

Couldn't you have channeled Fortuna or something?"

"At the time, Lilith was an appropriate choice," I said. The one thing I had not told them was the hows and whys Lilith had become attached to me. I preferred not to spell out details.

Or maybe it was more that I didn't like how crazy I'd sound if I just blurted out,I walked in the door of the covenstead and interrupted the last rites. As the Vatican agents were getting a bead on me, I called out to the most destructive, evil G.o.ddess I could think of. She answered. They died. I woke up later. Yeah, that's right, I don't remember a thing, but the blood was on my hands . The last part made me sound the most insane. I could almost hear the expert witness for the prosecution explaining how people with split personalities act just like this.

How hadmy life become so complicated?

"You just drew the G.o.ddess into you?" William asked. I could see the twinkle behind his eyes returning as he contemplated the nature of the Craft involved in my merging with Lilith. "And she stayed? Weren't you in a protective circle? Didn't you ground?"

"No, William, I didn't. I didn't cast a circle, or meditate, or put on a hemp robe and chant." That came out harsher than I intended because he was right. In a moment of panic, I'd thrown years of safe practice out the window. Just like tonight, I'd just reached out to whoever was closest. I suddenly remembered the comforting weight of armor on my shoulder. Had I been close to accepting another more benevolent G.o.ddess tonight?

"Man, how lucky is that?" I looked up to see William in full pout, his arms crossed in front of his chest, chin thrust out. "I can't even meditate without falling asleep."

"Boy, you can barely tie your own shoes without help," Izzy said with a kind smile.

"Hey," he started to protest until he saw her grin. Then, he shrugged, "Yeah, you're right. I suppose if I could finally settle on a pantheon, that would help." I smiled, but I was still trying to decide if I felt lucky. I knew what William meant. He was asking why some people had an affinity to magic and others didn't. There didn't seem to be an easy answer. I'd learned magic the way a lot of people do: I'd studied books, practiced with the coven, and attuned my senses to the hidden world. But William was right. Some people seemed to get it relatively easily; others never did.

All I could say was that when I looked, I saw-I saw those things other people missed. I'd been able to read auras since as long as I could remember, though I hadn't understood what they were at first. It had nothing to do with my upbringing as far as I could tell. Sure, my parents were open to transcendental experiences, being aging hippies and all that, but they hadn't raised me Pagan, just, perhaps, open. My Romany grandmother was the closest thing I had to a claim at a family tradition, but when I was honest about it, she had been much more interested in teaching me quilting than palm reading.

Maybe affinity to magic was random, like some kind of recessive gene that popped up in some people like violet eyes.

In the darkness and the reflection of the car window, my eyes looked gray. I also looked exhausted. The shower had added a nice fluff to my pixie cut, but maybe because I hadn't bothered with much makeup, my face seemed washed out and old. I sighed. I wasn't up for this. I didn't feel hungry. I just wanted to curl up under my comforter and cry.

Izzy and William must have been having similar thoughts. "You know," said Izzy, starting up the car.

"I'm not really in the mood for a burger, are you guys?"