"My dear;" Sabrina said softly with tears in her eyes, "you do not need to defend yourself. I admire you more than I can say. You are a heroine. You must love Robert very much to have given up so much, to have endured so much, to be with him."

"Well, I do adore him," Esmeralda admitted, her spirits rising mercurially at the evidence of Sabrina's sympathy and understanding, "but I'm no heroine. I was quite accustomed to riding horseback because Papa was such a nip cheese-"

She stopped again, this time putting her hands to her mouth. It was "not done" to say such things, and she would not have slipped up except that she was so accustomed to speaking freely to Robert about her father and, of course, there had never been any occasion to speak of him to anyone else. However, Sabrina laughed heartily.

"You are a refreshment to the spirit, Merry. I wondered whether it would be necessary to avoid discussing your father. Papa Moreton was appalled-now don't start to look like a lost waif again. I a.s.sure you he does not a.s.sociate you with your father's peculiarities, and Mama Moreton does not even know about them. In fact, if you feel strong enough, they are very, very eager to meet you."

Esmeralda drew a deep breath. "Of course, but I cannot go to Cornwall at this moment. Please. I must wait for Robert." Her voice started to shake, but she added another, "I must," appealingly.

"Naturally you must wait for Robert," Sabrina said. "Dear Merry, there's no question of you going to Cornwall. The Moretons are here. Perce didn't know they were coming when he wrote to Robert. You were equally invited to Moreton House, and I thought you would go there, which is why I was just a little surprised-"

"Oh gracious, I hope the Earl and Countess of Moreton won't be offended," Esmeralda exclaimed. "I just did what Robert told me. I didn't even know Robert had written to them-or to your husband."

"Oh, that Robert!" Sabrina exclaimed, laughing. "If I know him, he never read his father's or mother's letters. Anything longer than five lines is too much bother for him. Perce was perfectly right, and I should not have scolded him about the note he wrote."

"No," Esmeralda protested, ready to leap to Robert's defense, but she paused as a maid carried in a tray, which she prepared to set over Esmeralda's thighs. Esmeralda shook her head. "I would prefer to get up," she said firmly.

Sabrina waved the maid toward a table, and Katy brought an exquisite peignoir, which fit Esmeralda very well. "I thought Meg's things would fit her," Sabrina said to Katy with satisfaction. "What a relief. That means we can shop at leisure." And when Esmeralda protested faintly at the notion of borrowing some unknown person's clothing without permission, Sabrina laughed, said, "It's only t.i.t for tat," and explained how Megaera had also arrived without a st.i.tch except what she was wearing and had worn Sabrina's clothes. "And, you know, Leonie came to England without any clothing, too. Well, neither had I any, but I was only nine. Still, it's becoming a family tradition. Really, I begin to think one of us will have to write a book. We seem to be very adventurous females. How did you happen to be all alone in Lisbon when Robert married you?"

Esmeralda almost dropped the cup she was lifting to her lips and stared at Sabrina. "Robert did not marry me in Lisbon," she said. "Did he not explain...? Oh, heaven, what did he say?"

"Merry-" Sabrina put her hand over Esmeralda's and squeezed it gently. "Don't be so frightened. We are all very eager to love you, and I can see that you well deserve that love for yourself. I will not deny that Perce and I were a little concerned when we first heard about it. It seemed so unlike Robert to marry for money-"

"Money?" Esmeralda squeaked. "How do you know about the money?"

Sabrina looked a trifle self-conscious. "Well, of course, when Robert simply announced that he had married a woman named Esmeralda Mary Louisa Talbot whom he had met in India, Papa Moreton began to move heaven and earth to discover who you were, and when the Earl of Moreton and Roger St. Eyre start to move heaven and earth, believe me, it moves. Your bankers were as clay in their hands. Merry, what is wrong?"

"Robert doesn't know," Esmeralda wailed. "Oh, he will be so angry. He will never understand why I did not tell him."

"No one can be angry about half a million pounds," Sabrina said, laughing, and then the first sentence Esmeralda had said hit her. "Robert doesn't know!" she repeated, stunned. "But why... Oh, Merry, forgive me, I don't mean to offend you, but I know Robert did not carry a broken heart home from India, and he was always so determined not to marry. So why-"

Esmeralda picked up her cup, sipped her tea, took a deep breath, and said, "Because he is the kindest, most chivalrous man in the entire world," and began at the beginning and told the story of her life.

Naturally, it did not take five minutes. There were questions, and pauses while Sabrina whooped with laughter, and other pauses when both women wept, and there were interruptions when emotions became too intense and Katy insisted Esmeralda must dress to give her a chance to calm down. However, before noon the whole tale was told-all of it, even including Esmeralda's pregnancy, at which Sabrina exclaimed with intense joy and reported she was in the same condition herself.

"And I was growing afraid that I never would be," Sabrina said. "Because, you know, Perce and I have been lovers for more than a year, but right after we were married-in September because William was killed a year ago August and it seemed wrong to marry virtually the day the official mourning was over-" Sabrina stopped, aware from Esmeralda's stunned expression that she had heard nothing of this before. "Robert never told you," she said. And then asked, "What in the world do you talk about?"

"The army," Esmeralda said simply.

Sabrina whooped with laughter again. "I should have known," she gasped, and embarked on the story of her life, which brought in Leonie and Megaera and their experiences.

By the time Sabrina was finished, Esmeralda was as lighthearted as she could be, considering that Robert was still in Spain and might be in danger. She was no longer in the least troubled by any irregularity in her background. "I'm awfully glad to know I am not the only one who has seduced an innocent husband," she said laughing.

Nor did her meeting with Robert's parents later in the day do anything to dampen her happiness. It was clear that the countess was utterly delighted with her new daughter-in-law. She was as kind as her son and would have loved any woman Robert was willing to marry. That Esmeralda was also gentle and most eager to be loved filled her cup of joy. She had never believed that Robert married for the money and now put it out of her mind. The earl was less simplistic in his response, but he knew Esmeralda was from a decent family. The earl had, naturally, applied to Robert's commanding officer for information and had received rather more than he expected, but it was good news.

Thus it was her father-in-law who told Esmeralda that Sir Arthur had not forgotten his promise to try to discover her relatives in Ireland. He had been successful and had traced both her Connor and her Talbot relations. Both had immediately offered her a home or any other help they could give her. And this, the earl said dryly, must be out of disinterested kindness, because Sir Arthur had no idea she was an heiress and could not have pa.s.sed the information to them.

All the while he had been talking and listening, the earl had also been judging, and before he parted from Esmeralda, he made it plain that he would have approved Robert's choice even without what Esmeralda brought.

"Not that I have any objection to an Indian heiress as a daughter," he said, bending down to kiss her brow, "but I am very glad to know that my opinion that Robert is an idiot need not be revised. I hate to revise an opinion."

"Robert is not an idiot," Esmeralda protested, smiling impishly. "After all, he did not marry me for love, either."

"That is what I said," the earl pointed out, with a teasing grin. "Any man who did not love you on sight is an idiot, my dear."

Thus Esmeralda's homecoming was truly a homecoming. She remained with Sabrina, not because she was not pressed most lovingly to live at Moreton House but, she explained, because Robert had told her to go to Stour House and would expect to find her there. However, she saw almost as much of the occupants of Moreton House as if she had lived there. Her days were very busy. There were arrangements to make with her bankers, there were long letters to write to her relatives in Ireland, there was an apartment in a neighboring mews to fit out for Molly and Carlos, above the stable where Boa Viagem and Luisa would live, there was her own shopping to do, for when the Season began, all of the Moretons' and the St. Eyres' social connections would wish to meet her.

However, despite the steady and absorbing occupation and the kindness of her new relations, Esmeralda's eyes grew more and more haunted as each day pa.s.sed. No one remarked on her growing fear. They were all afraid themselves. Perce spent half his time at the Horse Guards prying for information, but no one had any news more recent than that brought by Sir Charles. Roger St. Eyre came down from Stour himself to speak to Lord Castlereagh, but even Roger could not obtain information that was not available. They did learn, from Philip via the smuggler Pierre Restoir, that Bonaparte himself had left Spain before the English had reached Corunna, but that gave no a.s.surance the embarkation had been successful.

Esmeralda cried herself to sleep every night, and the only thing that could make her smile by January 26 was little Kevin, who was growing like a weed in summer. At teatime the next afternoon, the whole family had gathered in Sabrina's parlor. The conversation was strained and disjointed, and there were frequent silences. The last of these was broken by the sound of horses trotting down the street. Everyone burst into talk at once, frantically denying the need to listen in the hope that the carriage would stop, but Esmeralda could not pretend. She rose to her feet with a gasp and ran to the window. Silence fell again like a pall until she turned and ran out of the room.

Into that silence, her voice came, high and terrified. "Major Colborne, oh, no!"

And then a man's voice, but no one heard what he said because there was a concerted rush to the door. Naturally, the jam there prevented anyone from getting out for a minute. Chivalry was forgotten. The stronger males pushed out in front of the women and went racing down the stairs then out the open door, but there they all stopped, effectively blocking the view of their anxious womenfolk so that the countess began to weep aloud until her husband turned and said joyfully, "It's all right, Emma. He's just getting out of the carriage slowly."

Then Robert was shaking off Colborne's steadying grip, catching Esmeralda to him, and saying, "Don't cry, love, don't. I'm quite all right."

"You would be," Colborne snapped, "if you hadn't insisted driving at such a pace." And then to Esmeralda, "He's had a nasty knock on the head and lost a bit of skin on his ribs, that's all. When he's had some sleep, he'll be fine."

"I'm fine now," Robert insisted. "You're all making a fuss."

"I never make a fuss," Esmeralda said firmly, "but you are not fit to be seen or smelled, Robert. Your appearance is frightening your mother. She is not accustomed to filthy rags. Come to my room, and I will make you decent."

She did no such thing, of course. He barely made it up the stairs, although he stubbornly refused any a.s.sistance, and when Esmeralda tumbled him into bed, boots, and all, he fell asleep in the middle of a mumbled protest. Tactfully, no one disturbed them. Truthfully, no one wished to do so. Now that his family knew Robert was alive and not seriously hurt or ill, everyone was more interested in Colborne's news than in Robert himself. Even Robert's mother was content to leave him to Esmeralda. Robert was not easy to nurse.

Fortunately, he did not need nursing. He had been suffering from no more than a recurrence of the dizziness and raging headache, caused originally by his concussion and brought on again by the jostling of the carriage. About ten o'clock Robert sighed and opened his eyes. He, too, looked at the elaborate bedcurtains, but he guessed at once where he was and said, "Merry?"

She was there before the sound died, bending over the bed, kissing him, murmuring disjointed e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.i.o.ns of love and joy, and then pulling away a little to say, "You must be starved. I'll ring for the maid to bring up some supper."

"A bath first," he said, smiling. "We did get food along the road." Then he frowned. "What happened to M'Guire?"

"Oh, I am so glad he is safe, too. I didn't see him. I didn't know he was with you. But don't worry about him. I'm sure someone will have taken him to Molly's rooms."

"I hope you've done well by her," Robert said soberly. "I owe M'Guire my life."

Esmeralda's breath caught. "What happened?" she whispered.

"I haven't the faintest idea." Robert shrugged, but his voice was cheerful. "You know M'Guire isn't the greatest of talkers. From what I made out, I must have been hit on the head during the action and left for dead. When the French were rolled back and I didn't show up, M'Guire started to ask questions, found Hermes, and came looking for me."

"You mean no one else noticed you were missing?" Esmeralda said in a tight voice.

"Well, they had a lot to think about," Robert replied, the lightness gone from his voice. "Sir John's dead. He was struck by a cannonball." He blinked back tears. "It took him such a long time to die." But then he sighed and said, "Maybe it was worth it to him. He knew that we had beaten the French before he died. We buried him there, at Corunna."

"Oh, I am so sorry, Robert."

He looked at her steadily for a minute and then dropped his eyes. "I am, too-I think. But you know, Merry, the government would have made him a scapegoat. They would have torn him apart for this campaign, even with the victory at Corunna and despite the fact that I believe he has saved Spain. He was a sensitive man. He never had the resilience Sir Arthur has. I think that partly caused the mistakes he made. He felt he couldn't take a chance, that they'd be down on him like dogs on a rat if he was defeated."

There was nothing she could say, and she kissed him wordlessly and when he lay quietly, unresponding, she pulled the bell cord and went to the door to wait for the maid. When she had instructed her to arrange for a bath, Robert was sitting up. He put out a hand to her, and she took it and kissed it and then began to help him take off his clothes. She shuddered a little at the raw patch on his ribs, but she could see it was healing well, and she made no remark, merely handing him one of Perce's dressing gowns. He stood belting it, looking down at her.

"How beautiful you are. Merry," he said, smiling again. "I'm glad you grabbed me and were screeching 'Robert, oh, Robert.' I might not have recognized you. And then I would have made my bow to you as if you were a stranger."

She laughed. "I hope it's love that has changed my appearance and not that your eyes have gone funny because of that knock on the head."

"There's nothing wrong with my eyes. But maybe it's all the finery." Suddenly he frowned. The word "finery" had brought to mind the cost of such ornaments for a woman and that reminded him of money and a statement in his father's letter that had shocked and hurt him-and the truth of which he could scarcely believe. "d.a.m.n it, Merry," he exclaimed, "do you have some secret you don't want to tell me?"

"Not now, Robert," she said eagerly. "I've been waiting to tell you. You'll be happy. In July you'll be a father."

"A-a what?"

She laughed aloud at his stunned expression, unaware that he was thinking along other lines. In the ship on the way home, Robert had come across his parents' letters and for want of other occupation had read them. His mother's was simply full of joy at his having taken a wife and concern for him-motherly nonsense. But his father's had been read several times over in stunned disbelief. It had informed him that Merry was worth over five hundred thousand pounds and had inquired delicately why he felt the need to marry for money.

"A father," Esmeralda repeated distinctly, enjoying herself. "It is a natural consequence of...of consummating a marriage, you know."

His mouth opened, closed. "Me?" he said, still not really absorbing her meaning. "Me? A father?"

"I swear to you that I have been faithful." Esmeralda giggled. "Unless this is another immaculate conception, you must be the father"

"Oh my G.o.d," he gasped. "Sit down. Or should you lie down? Can I-"

"Robert," she choked, almost unable to speak for laughing, "stop. I am not ill. Honestly, you must not coddle me or worry about me. I have been with child since we left Lisbon."

He sat down so hard he almost bounced off the bed. "Since Lisbon? You could have killed yourself! You might have died on that retreat! Merry, for G.o.d's sake, why didn't you tell me? Why?"

"I didn't know myself," she a.s.sured him. "I wasn't sure until we were at Sahagun. One doesn't know right away, Robert. There are so many things that can cause a woman to...to be irregular. And after Sahagun...oh, Robert, my love, what could you have done for me? What good would it have done to tell you? If I had lost the child, you would have blamed yourself for what was not your fault."

"But it was. I never should have let you come. I should have sent you home from Lisbon. I will never-"

She put a hand over his mouth. "Don't say it, Robert. Don't. There is no need. I did not lose the baby. I do not think I will ever live through a worse experience than that retreat. I survived, and I still have our child. Don't you see? I want to follow the drum, Robert. I love it."

He pulled her close and buried his head in her breast. "I don't know what to say, Merry. I missed you. I can't tell you how different everything was when you were gone. I felt empty inside. But...but it isn't right. I don't want you to endure-"

"Oh, Robert!" She kissed the top of his head, which was all she could reach. "When we're on the march together, even the fleas are fun. The retreat... That isn't likely ever to happen again. You know it. And you told me yourself that the worst of it was...was not necessary. It's not because you want me to do it but that I want to do it."

"What about the baby?" he asked, without looking up.

"Your mama will be delighted to keep it, or Sabrina would. She expects a baby a month or two before ours should come, and Katy can nanny both of them with a nursery maid to help her. Robert, this war can't go on forever. And when it's over we can have our son or daughter with us wherever you are stationed."

He looked up then and smiled at her. "I think I am being led down the primrose path again," he said. "It can't all be this easy. I've known other men who had children, and it was all very complicated, fetching peaches in January and tears over the nanny's misbehavior. Is life really going to be a bed of roses?" He bent his head again to the b.r.e.a.s.t.s exposed by Esmeralda's low-cut gown. "You smell like roses," he murmured, and then suddenly turned his head aside. "I'd better leave you alone, I guess."

"Leave me alone?" she repeated. "What do you mean?"

"Well, if you're...er..."

Esmeralda was laughing again. "Enceinte is the polite word, I think. My book of etiquette had that-although why it is more polite to say pregnant in French than in English, I have no idea. But I a.s.sure you, having a child is no reason to stop being married. My goodness, you would end up hating the poor little creature-and so would I."

"But I thought-"

He left that unfinished and pulled her between his legs, standing up at the same time so that his hard shaft slid up her body. Esmeralda gasped with surprise. She had not had the least suspicion of the side effect their discussion was having. Before she could react in any way, however, Robert was kissing her, pulling at her dress, running his lips down the side of her neck and then around to the top of her b.r.e.a.s.t.s.

"Robert," she whispered, "Robert, wait."

But he was not willing to wait, and when the maid most inopportunely scratched at the door, just as he was removing her pantalets, he roared, "Go away, and don't come back," reducing Esmeralda to embarra.s.sed giggles. When he had her naked on the bed, however, he did not mount her immediately but bent over her, gently stroking her body, placing featherlight kisses on her b.r.e.a.s.t.s and belly, and finally lying down beside her, still stroking her, running his fingers between her thighs, just barely touching and touching again the most sensitive spot in her whole body. She shuddered, lifted herself toward his hand in a mute appeal.

"Why did you want me to wait, Merry?" he whispered.

"There's no reason now, my love," she sighed, pulling at him urgently. "Come now. Come to me."

Later, when they were both content, she started to laugh. Robert lifted his brows. "It was the maid." She giggled. "That was why I said wait. I knew the maid would arrive right in the middle. Everyone in the house will know..."

"Everyone in this house would have a.s.sumed the worst, even if we were innocent as saints," he said, and then sat up. "But you are not a saint, and not innocent. I'd almost forgotten. Do you have half a million pounds, Merry?"

"Oh...yes."

"Why the h.e.l.l didn't you tell me?"

Her eyes were wide and apprehensive. "Because in the beginning I knew you would send me away if you found out I didn't need your help. And after...oh, Robert, I just forgot. It was so unimportant compared with all the exciting things that were happening in Portugal and Spain... I just forgot."

He was silent for a moment, staring down at her, wondering if any woman could "forget" half a million pounds. And then he smiled. Merry wasn't "any" woman. She was Merry, the only perfect woman in the world.

"All right," he said, grinning from ear to ear, "you win. If you think riding all day, sleeping in flea-ridden hovels, and serving endless cups of tea to a bunch of loudmouthed army officers is more interesting than half a million pounds, I guess following the drum is the life for you."

About the Author.

Roberta Gellis was driven to start writing her own books some forty years ago by the infuriating inaccuracies of the historical fiction she read. Since then she has worked in varied genres-romance, mystery and fantasy-but always, even in the fantasies, keeping the historical events as near to what actually happened as possible. The dedication to historical time settings is not only a matter of intellectual interest, it is also because she is so out-of-date herself that accuracy in a contemporary novel would be impossible.

In the forty-some years she has been writing, Gellis has produced more than twenty-five straight historical romances. These have been the recipients of many awards, including the Silver and Gold Medal Porgy for historical novels from the West Coast Review of Books, the Golden Certificate from Affaire de Coeur, the Romantic Times Award for Best Novel in the Medieval Period (several times) and a Lifetime Achievement Award for Historical Fantasy. Last but not least, Gellis was honored with the Romance Writers of America's Lifetime Achievement Award.