Warning: The novel has been tagged with BE- a.k.a. there is no happy ending for the current and any future pairings within the set of short stories. Viewer/Reader discretion is advised.
Furthermore, this is my first time translating a novel- an ongoing one too on top of that. Any typos/fixes/clarifications wanted, please feel free to comment. Also highly recommend reading this in its original language if you can because no amount of translating will do it justice.
001
The young girl leaned over by the window squinting, envious of the prince currently shaking his head, reading the book aloud within the imperial academy. The maid-in-waiting behind covered her eyes, in a small voice, “Princess, don't look any more. You[1] won't be able to get in anyway- if the Imperial Concubine knows of this, you would be scolded again.”
The princess who was offended by the maid on the side was not unhappy, and only softly spoke, “No problem, let me[2] just look for a while more, I won't go in.”
However, the little maid did not let the princess finish speaking, and quickly carried her off and away.
Looking at the increasingly distant imperial academy and gradually disappearing reading voices, that pair of clear but childish eyes begun to acc.u.mulate mist, filled with unwillingness.
Once again…… It's the same every time.
Zhao Li Xin is the tenth youngest in the imperial family, called “Princess” by the outside.
When Imperial Concubine Liu had received favour from the Emperor, she was just a small n.o.ble, and climbed up the ranks when she had given birth to the prince. When she became the Imperial Concubine, she had become pregnant with another, and had told the outside it was a little princess after giving birth.
When it was known it was a girl, the Emperor[3] had loved the Imperial Concubine even more tenderly. Although he had also loved Zhao Li Xin dearly, he could not stop his own loved concubine from whispering words into his ears every day.
“The Emperor already favours me and Ming Zhe, if you treat Xin'er just as well, I fear my sisters of the back palace would not be happy about it.”
“Xin'er is a princess anyway, with the imperial family's protection, who would dare oppose her?”
“Emperor……”
The charming concubine who was in the embrace of the Emperor would privately, like calling out a pet, wave her hand to call out to him, touch his girlish tuft of hair, and in an inadvertent manner, “Xin'er, Mother is only doing this for your good. If you were a prince, would you be able to peacefully live in this palace until today?”
“Your Imperial Brother has already taken on disasters left and right for you. Become a princess, wait until the day your brother ascends to that position, then you can take back your place and a.s.sist him.”
“Xin'er, Mother knows you have it rough, but for our future, you will do your best, right?”
At the beginning, Zhao Li Xin would use silence as a way to express their own dissatisfaction, until finally, would only promptly reply with a short sound, then look at his Mother in front smile as if with a embarra.s.sed young girl's femininity.
He did not understand. Why couldn't he be like his Imperial Brother and act like a prince, then rightly study with his other Imperial Brothers in the imperial academy, receive praise when fluidly answering Father's question; and instead become a princess, like a maiden within her bedroom…… No, not even like so. The maiden within the bedroom was only confined within a four sided courtyard. He, on the other hand, was trapped deep in a palace's cage, only to be monitored by others in the end.
The people of the palace were the type go with the flow[4] to begin with. Who beside himself was not one of Mother's people? The wise would see that Mother's att.i.tude, and the way he and his brother were treated, were clearly different.
He was also a prince. Why could he not regain his position as a male? He wanted to become a person above others. What he wanted to do since long before, was to become the Emperor. He did not want to become a subordinate a.s.sisting the king eternally.
It was snowing hard on this day. When Fu Hong Wen was just coming of the imperial academy, he saw the third prince had a little girl by his side, hands also holding a lunch box. When they saw him, their eyes lit up in a second, and flashed a sweet smile, “Are you the young Grand Tutor that Brother frequently talks about?”
Perhaps the smile was too dazzling, Fu Hong Wen had fell into a trance. He then came back to his senses after a while, “Greetings to the Princess.”
Although it was said that Imperial Concubine Liu and the Third Prince had received favour, this favour seemed to not have extended to this princess. They had almost come of age, but had not received a t.i.tle yet.
The fluffy white m.u.f.fler had complimented this princess' bright red face to be even brighter, their eyes lit like stars, unconsciously drawing in others, “No need for so much formalities, Grand Tutor. With the weather as cold as this, you should go back earlier.”
The child's cute appearance had made Fu Hong Wen not help but lament- his future self must give birth to a little girl as lovely as the Tenth Princess. But in an instant, he returned to his senses, and realized his treacherous action.
This is the princess. As an official, how could he have this kind of thought?
He could not help but turn back his head to take a look. The hands of the little girl in the middle of the snowy earth had already been frozen red; the maid-in-waiting behind carrying the umbrella could not have blocked off much wind and snow for the girl. Most of it had leaned toward the Third Prince.
Fu Hong Wen narrowed his eyes, and sighed inside his heart.
In regards to the imperial family, he dared not to interfere.
Fu Hong Wen did not pay much attention this little interlude. When he met up with this Tenth Princess again, it was already the beginning of spring. He did not know whether or not it was because it was a long time since he saw them, but Fu Hong Wen thought this little princess grew a bit taller again. Perhaps because the weather had turned warmer, people would appear taller if not enc.u.mbered by so much clothing.
Unlike the limpid, clear eyes of last time, this time, he was met with rippling, teary eyes, misty and unclear, not a hint of that lovely, enchanting appearance from the first time in sight.
Zhao Li Xin did not appear like a princess at all. Hiding out inside the cave of the fake mountain, messily rubbing their face, they arched over and rushed straight out, bringing along a nasal, soft tone, only calling out to him, “Grand Tutor”, but unable to ask why he appeared here.
Seeing the other party's bright red eyes and reddening cheeks from the force a moment ago, he was unable to hold back in the end. Fu Hong Wen lightly asked, “What is it that has made the Princess so unhappy?”
The other party looked at him astonished, then the mouth, with some difficulty, managed to lift up, “It is nothing, I only wanted to experience the feeling of reading aloud in the imperial academy, but Mother said I was making a fuss, and that girls without talent are virtuous……”
The voice grew smaller the more was spoken, the small head had also gradually lowered more and more with it. In the end, it was raised up again, eyes carrying an unclear sort of plea, along with it, an even more pitiable nasally voice, “Grand Tutor, are girls with no talent truly more virtuous?”
Seeing the little girl with the desire to make contributions like men, Fu Hong Wen's heart tightened for a moment, and in a tender voice, “Princess, girls without talent are ok, but those with talent are also fine. What is most important is in the heart. You are the Princess, with the Imperial Concubine gaining this much favour, if you ask the Emperor for an act of grace, the Emperor would surely allow for it.”
Zhao Li Xin disappointingly shook their head, “It won't happen, don't even think about talking about it with Father, Mother would not approve of it first.”
Although it seemed strange, Fu Hong Wen thought about it, “If the Princess does not dislike it, I can allow my little sister be your partner from time to time. Although my family's little sister can be stubborn at times, her knowledge is not bad.”
“Grand Tutor, can I take your words to be true?” Zhao Li Xin's lit eyes once again darkened, “Never mind it. If Grand Tutor's little sister entered the palace often, and taught me to read, if Mother saw, she would not be happy.”
“You can also come to the residence. This way, the imperial concubine will not be able to see.”
Seeing the other party's kind smile, their own goal fulfilled, Zhao Li Xin's heart beat faster, ears reddening along with it. Flas.h.i.+ng him a smile, the eyes also squinted, “Much thanks then, Grand Tutor.”
This smile pierced in Fu Hong Wen's heart without defence, like there was some unknown feeling buried like a seed, waiting for a certain day to break through the earth.
[1] The way the court lady addresses the princess is a more formal way of saying “you” (您, rather than 你, which is a casual way of addressing someone)
[2] Third-person way of addressing themselves. Typically, people never address themselves directly, only referring to themselves by their t.i.tle or relation to someone else as a form of respect. a.s.sume this is the case for most if not all instances of “You”, “I”, “Me” or any first person ways of addressing people that appear in this translation.
[3] Read, “Son of Heaven”.
[4] Read, “Sail with the wind”, or “See which way the wind blows”.