Yun Chang POV

“Looks like the enemy has set up camp over there.” I said as I looked ahead. In the distance, there were fires dotting the area in front of the mountains. Though there was a great distance between us, it was wide open area here so we could be detected if we were loud enough.

“This is…” Zhao Yun blinked and continued in a despondent tone, “Looks like we didn’t manage to force them to retreat in the frontal battle huh?”

“That can’t be helped. Our gear is significantly worse than theirs.” I said and sighed, “I just hope that they didn’t lose too many troops in the frontal battle.”

Though we had achieved a great victory in the first battle, any advantages we gained there was overturned in the second battle. I wonder if the enemy achieved their objectives with this battle.

“Ah, could this be a good chance to launch a sneak attack on them?” Zhao Yun asked as her eyes bulged, “If the enemy has just finished a battle, this might be a good chance to attack them unawares.”

“Un… But we aren’t clear on the enemy’s numbers. And besides, the battle that our forces just went through is undoubtedly far harsh than what they have been through.” I shook my head sadly, “It’s best to act prudently now.”

I do not want a repeat of what just happened after all.

“Un, alright.” Zhao Yun nodded, “Well then, we best go around them so we don’t get found out.”

“Un.” I replied and pulled on the reins, leading my horse around, “Troops at the back, do your best to stay low and tread lightly. Be careful not to make any loud noises.”

As I gave the order to the troops, I could see that the number was significantly lesser than what I first started out with. Only about a third of them remain.

There is also another reason why I am unwilling to take the risk and launch a sneak attack. Be it Guan Ping, Zhou Cang, I or the troops, I am afraid none of us has the will to fight any longer. For now, all I want is to see big brother as soon as possible.

Zhao Yun and I continued to lead the troops around. Only when we could no longer see the fires did we stop and continue our return to Xinye. It was a good thing that the enemy encampment was on that side as we did not have to deviate too much from our original route.

We were now riding slowly, and now that danger was far away from us, I began to relax. When I looked up, I saw that the moon was hanging behind some clouds which meant that it was about midnight now.

As we neared Xinye city, I began to feel more and more despondent and I began to imagine what would happen after my return. At this time, I felt like a child who had committed a mistake and was about to be scolded by her father.

I wonder if Li Dian and Cao Ren felt this way after the first battle? This sort of gnawing discomfort and painful anguish that refuses to go away. Thanks to that strategist who is allegedly called Shen Pei, they were able to even the odds.

“Don’t be like this, Lord Guan Yu.” Zhao Yun suddenly spoke up after being silent all this while. I looked at her and realised that she had been staring at me and felt a little uncomfortable.

“It’s a little difficult to get over this…” I said and trailed off. It was difficult to let go of all the feelings I had now but I still listened and tried anyway as I concentrated and tried to relax.

Up ahead was our encampment. I have no idea how a general who lost is supposed to be treated nor how the general herself ought to act. But I suppose it&r

squo;s the same with victories. First, I will have to settle the troops then report to big brother.

However, it was already late at night and big brother might have fallen asleep. Is it really alright to go see him now? I do not know but I do hope that he has fallen asleep. If he is, I will have more time to think of how to explain my failure and steel myself for the punishment that will come.

*Pu*!

Un?! Just as I was preoccupied with these thoughts, a loud sound came from the encampment in the distance. Zhao Yun and I looked over and saw that the fires in the encampment were now very brightly lit and the surroundings were illuminated.

“Lord Guan Yu, could the encampment be attacked?!”

“No, that can’t be. There are no sounds of combat.” I replied, feeling troubled, “And the fires seem to be just lights…”

As I spoke, I could see lights spreading out from the encampment towards us. When I looked closer, I saw that there were troops running over, though not at too quick a pace.

“This is…” I was a little suspicious but stopped, “Everyone, halt for now.”

At my word, the troops stopped marching. They tiredly looked ahead but did not know what was happening. Some thought they were enemies and held up their weapons tiredly.

… Those troops should not be enemies. No, that is… It took me a while to get to the answer and when I did so, my eyes bulged in disbelief.

*Tatatatatata*…

As the troops neared us, we could see that they were not wearing the uniform of the enemy nor did they yell for our blood. All they did was merely march in 2 lines on either side of us with fires in hand. Their marching was done in unison and their clothing was tidy. These were Feng Xian’s few and elite heavy infantry.

*Tata*

2 loud sounds filled the air as they saluted us. When I looked again, I saw that the 2 lines of fires seemed to form a bridge leading back to the encampment. I could not believe what I was seeing as this was the sort of welcome that was only reserved for victorious returns.

It was clearly unsuitable for this occasion, much less at this time. I turned back and saw that the enemy encampment was rather distant, which meant that they would not come to attack even if they saw the fires.

“Zhao Yun… This is…”

“No, I was not told about this…” Zhao Yun seemed confused as well and swiveled about as she looked around.

“Yun Chang.” Just then, a voice could be heard in the distance. It was light and very familiar, so familiar that I could identify who it was immediately.

When I looked ahead, I saw several people coming over from between the lights with 1 man, the one who called to me, leading ahead. However, I did not reply immediately as I always did. As I looked at him, I could feel my emotions getting more intense, stopping me from saying all the words I wanted to say.

“Yun Chang.” He called out once more as he came neared, making my heart skip a beat. Before I could decided what to do, I had already dismounted. And in that moment, the fires finally illuminated his face.

“… Big brother.”

“Yun Chang…” Big brother called out as he dismounted and looked me over before heaving a sigh of relief, “Ah, it’s good that Yun Chang is alright.”

Wu… My heart did a flip and my head felt faint when I heard this, and I felt like when I was drinking and merrymaking with everyone a long time ago. But was I tearing up back then?

“Big brother!” I yelled as I ran into big brother’s arms, unable to bear the swirling emotions inside me, and let out all of my hurt, regret and anguish as I called out to him. I buried my head into his shoulders and wanted very much to cry but there were many people around so I held it in. Besides, I had things to tell him, “Big brother, your little sister was inept and threw big brother’s face.”

Big brother did not reply immediately and merely patted my back lightly, “You did your best, little sister. I know. You did your best.”

My best. Yes, I did indeed my best yet I was unable to turn the tide. This is proof that there is much room for me to improve. I cannot quite say what I am feeling right now, but no matter what, I hope with all might to be able to win the next battle.

I want to see big brother achieve ascendancy so bad, to see the day when he could stand tall amongst the other feudal lords. In the end, this desire only made me hold him back.

As I thought so, tears streamed down my cheeks, so much so that even when I closed my eyes, it would not stop. Yet I could not tell him all of this and more I had in my heart. If I were to do so at this time, I would be no different from a manipulative liar. All this, would have to wait for after a victory.

“Yun Chang, are you alright?” I looked over when I heard a voice call out to me and saw Wen Yuan standing there. Her smile was not as bright as it usually was but she still looked like how she usually did. Standing beside her was Lu Bu of course, who looked wordlessly at me.

“Ah, Wen Yuan, Lord Lu Bu.” I greeted them. Judging by their faces, I could guess what was up, “Big brother, the frontal battle…” I said as I raised my head and wiped away my tears.

“As you saw on your way back, the enemy has set up camp outside Xinye.” Big brother said words that made me take a deep breath but then he continued, “The frontal battle was a draw.”