Koushaku 253 After his death

(TL: From Tanyas side)

I enter her room after knocking a while without answer.

Tanya.

She barely elevates her head to see me in.

Lady Iris how are you?

She lowers her head at my question and in a low voice mutters.

Im okay

You cant say that. Its so painful to see you, screaming every night his name while suddenly waking up. I cant even say that you sleep, its just fainting from time to time.

If this condition continues, my lady will fall ill soon.

My condition will become better with time, no worries Tanya

Its my responsibility. I shouldnt have told you the information that Dean died

I still regret that time.

It would have been good if I didnt report it.

Even if its just a postponement of her suffering.

Ive never seen her like this before.

Whether the man named Edward abandoned her or when the church accused her.

At any time, the young lady worries and immediately takes action.

She shed tears and continued to run looking forward.

but now

She was like an empty shell of her former self.

She sheds tears, faints, sheds tears and the cycle continues.

I feel like her strength is sipping out until nothing is left.

But I cant do anything to help her.

This is terrible and frustrating.

Instead of protecting the lady, I can only look at her suffering like this !

But she shakes her head quietly at my words.

I would have come to know sooner or later anyway. Because he is the first prince of this country.

She sighed at her words.

But I should have been more careful about the moment when to say it. You were very tired after all that happened and I brought in the news that your most loved person had died. Moreover, I was not able to comfort my lady. I couldnt say otherwise when you asked me too

It seems so painful. I cant even imagine your suffering and I dont know how to comfort you or help you. Losing someone I love is unimaginable.

Love?

I suddenly opened my eyes at the unexpected words I said.

In response, Iris is surprised for a moment but the next moment, she smiles sadly.

Oh, didnt you realize until now?

Iris reaction makes me think that I was correct at my statement.

Is that right? No, that cant be. You really were in love with the first prince all this time?

I wanted to cry at the thought of it.

Tanya. You must take a break.

It seems she used all her strength to utter those words.

No ! My lady youre in such a state, I cant rest now

Thats why. Tanya. If I fall ill or end dead, who will continue leading these people?

but

You are going now. This is an order. Rest.

She reluctantly speak those enraging words.

The orphanage children have visited several times.

She told me with a particularly gentle voice.

Orphanage? From the territory?

Yes, yes I hoped for the orphanages to be better places than before, and our efforts are bearing its fruit. So Tanya please think of them theyre awaiting our visit

Iris laughs softly Incredibly; she was able to smile, though it was awkward.

Next time, Ill talk to him when I gather the strength to visit his tomb. We must close the curtain to our history and memories in a time of sadness.

I was relieved to hear that.

I think my lady will recover it will take time but she can!