No, Emily, he retorted, jiggling the handle. Open the door. Now.

Though she heard the concern in his voice, she also heard authority, and she didnt put it past him to break in if she didnt do what he asked. Straightening, Emily drew in a gulp of air and inched over to the door. With so many emotions pummeling through her, she couldnt decipher if she was coming or going. Eyes glassed over, she swung open the door. Her words belted from her mouth before Gavin had a chance to speak. Did you know one in three women wind up in a mentally or physically abusive relationship?

Though his muscles tensed immediately, and blood raced within his veins, Gavin stared back wordlessly.

Sniffling, Emily nodded. But the funny part is, it doesnt start off that way. It starts off wonderful, as close to everything you imagined something solid should be. Then little by little, the relationship changes, and you wonder if youre going crazy. You literally start to question your own sanity. One minute, the person youre in love with is kind and caring, and the next, theyre flipping out. The first few times you write it off, assuming theyre having a bad day, but then it becomes a regular pattern of behavior. The person on the receiving end isnt oblivious to it but starts blaming themselves.

With his entire body on alert, Gavin clenched his jaw and tried to school his tone. In a low whisper, he brushed his fingers across her cheek and stared into her eyes. Did Dillon lay his hands on you?

Shaking, Emily swallowed. Did you know mental abuse can make a victim feel depression, anxiety, helplessness, nonexistent self-worth, and despair? But that doesnt matter because your feelings dont count, and you dont realize they never will. Sometimes the abuser makes you think they count. Then youre back to thinking that youre the one who belongs in an institution, not them. But on the norm, your needs or feelings, if you actually have the fucking courage to express themand most women dontare ignored, ridiculed, minimized, and dismissed. Youre told youre too demanding, or theres something wrong with you. Basically, youre denied the right to feel anything.

Crying hysterically, Emily started for the living room. Sitting on the couch, she stared up at Gavin as he walked into the room, his eyes pinned on hers. Sometimes you distance yourself from friends or loved ones. Sometimes youre not even allowed to have friends. Though youve given this person your heart and soul, their behavior becomes so erratic, its as if you feel like youre walking on landmines. But you continue to love them because they werent like this when you met, so it only seems obvious its your fault. Thenheres the hysterical part and just how twisted this whole thing becomesyou start making excuses for their inexcusable behaviors in an effort to convince yourself its normal. In an actual, damn effort to convince yourself youre the one whos made them become the monster theyve turned into.

Heart pounding, Gavin knelt in front of her. Anger-filled electricity zipped through his nerves as he reached for her hands, lacing his fingers in hers. For Christs sake, Emily, tell me what he did to you.

With tears streaming down her face, Emily started laughing. Wait, Gavin, heres the kicker. A couple of ladies from an organization fighting against domestic abuse told me I allowed this to happen because Im a product of my environment. I mean really, how clichd is that? Did I ever tell you about my parents? Did I ever tell you how after my father left us, my mother continued pursuing assholes?

Wanting to rip the answer out of her, Gavin simply shook his head. Emily had never opened up like this to him, and he knew he needed to let her speak. He squeezed her hands as his chest constricted with every unsteady breath she took.

Well, she did. She went through them like the world was going to end the next day. I get that being a single parent was hard for her. I do. But she definitely had a thing for picking up the local drunk at the nearest bar in order to help pay the next months rent. Theyd help for a while before they bounced out like my father did, but that never came without a price. She let them smack her around a bit if dinner wasnt cooked by the time they walked in the door, or if the house wasnt cleaned by the time they kicked off their filthy boots. They all looked different, but they came from a mold. Each and every single one of them was cut from the same piece of abusive wax.

Shaking her head, Emily squeezed Gavins hands this time. So, those women told me witnessing my mothers weakness drove my own, and her watching my grandfather beat my grandmother was what drove hers. They told me I was raised thinking it was okay for a man to do that to a woman. I was raised thinking self-worth was gained by catering to a mans needs at whatever cost. Even if it meant degrading myself time and time again.

But the apple can fall far from the tree. Fifty percent of children who grow up seeing that will never walk in their parents footsteps, whether its a boy watching his father beat his mother or a young girl watching her mother get hit. But this apple landed on the trees stump, Gavin. This apple took the same path as her mother. Pausing, Emily looked at her hands tangled around Gavins. When she brought her equally pained gaze back to his, it was all she could do to get out the words. They also told me because I physically fought back against Dillon the day of our wedding, Id finally broken the cycle.