"Crow..." She was too weak to speak normally. Normally, her mouth went off a million miles a minute. But now it was slow and quiet. Her lips were chapped from sleeping for so long. "It's okay."

"It'll never be okay." I'll never get over this. I'll never forgive myself for letting this happen. I'll never forgive my brother for doing this. He beat her so viciously, worse than Bones ever did to her.

"Is Cane dead?"

"No." I was embarrassed to say otherwise. "I shot him but he just left the hospital."

"Oh..." She couldn't hide her disappointment.

"He won't come near you again. Don't worry about him." It was hard to look her in the eye when her face was demolished with bruises. It physically pained me to see it. Not because she looked different-but because she was still in immense pain.

"Can I leave?"

I wasn't going to make her stay with me. The buttons didn't matter anymore. She'd been through enough. If she wanted to walk away I wouldn't stop her. "You're free to go whenever you wish." I thought she was safe with me but I quickly learned how incompetent I was.

"So we can go home now?" she whispered. "I hate hospitals..."

We? "You want to go to the estate?" I kept the hope out of my voice. If she asked me to drop her off at the airport right this instant I would.

She nodded. "I want to be in my bed-with my window."

If that were what she wanted, she would have it.

"I have a room with a private balcony. Would you want to move in there instead?" I should have offered that to her a long time ago.

"A balcony?" she whispered.

"Yeah. You can leave the doors open whenever you want. You could lay out there in the shade." If she even wanted my room I would give it to her.

After a moment of consideration she nodded. "I'd like that."

"I'm going to speak with the doctor and we'll be on our way." I kept my hand in hers because it was too difficult to pull away. I didn't want to leave her grasp, not even for a second. I almost lost her and it was the most painful feeling in the world.

She sensed my hesitance. "I'll be okay." She pulled her hand away, taking care of the difficult part for me.

I stood up and leaned over her. My mouth immediately moved to her forehead and I placed a long kiss against the skin. I held the affection for nearly a minute, my heart aching in violent pain. I'd never done such a thing, but it somehow felt right with her.

Like I should have been doing it from the beginning.

Chapter Nine.

Pearl Everything hurt.

Even days after my surgeries I felt weak. My body didn't work the same way it used to. The strength I once felt in my muscles was absent. If I had to defend myself, I was embarrassed to say I had no chance of succeeding.

I was that broken.

Cane was ruthless. When he got going, he couldn't be stopped. He wailed on me like I'd done something to him personally. Something in his mind snapped and he beat me to an inch of my life.

When I did nothing to provoke him.

What was his obsession with me? Crow wasn't going to return me to Bones so why did his brother keep fighting it? What did beating me senseless accomplish? Was his intention to kill me? I honestly thought I was dead. When I opened my eyes in the hospital room I couldn't believe where I was.

A part of me hoped I was dead.

I'd grown attached to a man who enjoyed hurting me, my own boyfriend sold me into slavery to pay off his own debts, I'd been raped by a madman, and there was no one waiting for me at home.

What was the point?

Crow took me back to his mansion and set me up in the room with the balcony. He carried me in his arms and placed me on the couch he positioned out under the shade. A table laden with books was placed beside it. Instead of having one of his maids attend to me, he stuck by my side. "Is there anything else I can get you?" He placed the armchair beside me and sat down. He wore jeans and a t-shirt, but he held himself with such rigidness it seemed like he was in a meeting. He was on edge every second we were together.

"I'm okay." I grabbed a book and felt my arm strain as I tried to lift it. Something as simple as a bound book was a struggle for me. It was pathetic. I'd lost all my strength in the fight and now I feared I would never get it back.

Crow assisted me. "It'll come back to you." He understood better than anyone how much I prided my ability to look after myself. Now I was so weak I had to rely on someone else to take care of me-something I hated.

I opened the book and turned to the page where I left off. I read through a paragraph when I felt his intense gaze on me. It was practically burning a hole though the side of my face. "I'm fine." I turned my gaze back to him, showing him that my resolution hadn't faltered when my body broke. That strength was still within my walls.

He lowered his gaze, shame and despair written all over his features. He didn't put up a stoic expression to hide his thoughts like he usually did. He allowed them pour out like a flood.

I hadn't looked in a mirror yet because I didn't want to see the damage Cane inflicted. But judging the swelling of my cheek and lips, I was still black and blue. My eyes throbbed and one was partially closed from the damage. I could see my demolished body and knew my face must complement it.

Crow turned his gaze to the balcony and looked across the vineyards. He didn't stare right at me anymore but I remained in his peripheral vision. Still and quiet as a statue, he lingered.

"You don't have to sit with me. I'm fine."

He didn't react to my words.

I may be weak but I didn't need his pity. "Crow, you can go."

"Maybe I need to sit with you." He spoke quietly, like he didn't want me to hear.

"No, you don't."

"You don't understand. Maybe you don't need me but I need you. So please, just let me sit here." His jaw was stern and he gripped the armrest like he would topple over at any second.

I respected his request and turned to my book. I didn't make a sound and neither did he. We just sat together in a heavy silence, him seething and me reading. I remembered the tears he formed for me, the tears from my pain. They mirrored my own when he told me his own heartbreak over losing his little sister. We'd both cried for one another. We were connected in more ways than we realized. But that didn't scare me anymore.

And it didn't scare him either.

I was too weak to walk.

It was embarrassing.

Crow had to carry me into the bathroom every time I needed to use it, and I was unable to fetch something I needed because my body wouldn't cooperate. I was a helpless corpse, relying on someone else to provide the things I needed.

It was humiliating.

The sun had disappeared beyond the horizon and the crickets filled the nighttime air. The fields came alive with the sounds of the breeze and the bugs that buzzed through the night. I wanted to sit there all day and appreciate the moment but I could barely keep my eyes open.

Crow sat at the edge of the couch and peered into my face. "Ready for bed?"

"Yeah..."

He lifted me into his arms and carried me back into the bedroom. The room was similar to my own but had its own qualities. It was slightly bigger and had a shower and a tub.

Instead of placing me on the bed he carried me into his bedroom and set me on his bed.

"What are you doing?"

He laid me back then lifted up my legs, removing my sweatpants. "Getting you ready for bed."

"In your bedroom?"

He returned my feet then tucked me in like a child. He'd never been so gentle with me, even when I asked him to make love to me. His clothes were stripped away and he got into bed beside me. "Yes." He turned off the bedroom light but didn't snuggle beside me. He knew my body was in immense pain even with the painkillers in my system. Too much pressure on my legs or arms would cause me immense discomfort. "When you're beside me, you're safe."

I stared at the contours of his face in the dark. "I'm sure I'll be fine down the hall."

"I want you here. Unless you don't want to be." Now he always gave me a choice. Before, it was his way or no way at all. I felt like an equal, not a possession.

"I do. But not if it's going to make you uncomfortable."

"I'd be more uncomfortable with you down the hall." He reached for my hand under the sheet and wrapped his long fingers gently around mine. "I don't want you to be anywhere else but here."

Crow didn't return to work. He stayed at the house and stuck to me like super glue. He didn't like a member of his staff come near me. He was the one who brought my meals, bathed me, and kept me company.

"I understand if you need to return to work." I sat at the table on the balcony, trying to eat everything on my plate. The medication I was on killed my appetite. I didn't have an urge to eat anything. If I had it my way, I wouldn't eat at all. "You don't need to stick around for me."

He didn't acknowledge my statement. He ate his salad and sandwich quietly.

When he didn't respond, I didn't push the matter. He was silently brooding behind his exterior. He was gentle with me when he looked after me, but he also seemed angry at the same time. "It's a beautiful day."

"I suppose." He ate half his food before he pushed the plate away. His appetite hadn't been the same. He was darker than usual, seething in a silent rage. If he didn't remind me he wanted to be there I would assume he hated me.

"I wish I could take a walk through the vineyards." I appreciated my health so much more when I didn't have it. Now that I couldn't walk, I wanted to run. Now that I couldn't use my arms I wanted to climb. One day, I would regain my strength. But the recovery would be a long process.

"I can carry you."

"No, it's okay." I chuckled because Crow came to my rescue when I needed anything. If I asked him to play me a song on the harmonica he would somehow pull it off.

"Anything you want, I'll make it happen." He said it with such conviction that I believed him.

"There's nothing I want at the moment." I was curious to know what became of Cane. He left the hospital but how injured was he? Should I expect him to make another attack? I didn't ask because it would get under Crow's skin.

"Do you want to leave?" He didn't meet my gaze when he asked the question, unable to say it with meaning. "Because you're free to go whenever you wish. I'll make all the arrangement to return you safely."

Freedom.

He was giving it to me on a silver platter. All I had to do was give the word and I'd be returned to America. I would listen to the traffic of the city and see the weirdoes pass me on the sidewalk. I would inhale the pollution and savor the smell on my nose. I would see skyscrapers block out the sun after five in the evening. I would see home again.

But how would I survive in my state? I couldn't even walk. I had no home to return to, not a cent to my name, and no job. I couldn't go back right now. And even if I could I wasn't sure I wanted to.

Something held me back.

"I want to stay."

He turned his gaze on me, unable to hide the relief in his eyes. "You're sure?"

I nodded.

"The offer isn't temporary. You can always change your mind."

"I know..." The buttons no longer mattered. He didn't own me anymore. I was free to come and go as I pleased-like a person. Our relationship was different. It was the first time I was treated as a guest.

"You have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Routine check up."

"Good. I need as many pills as possible."

A tiny smile formed on his lips, hardly noticeable. "I'll get you everything you need."

"Thanks." I picked at my salad but didn't take a bite. Everything Lars made was delicious but my stomach couldn't hold down food like it used to.

"Keep eating." His voice hinted with authority but he didn't exert it the way he used to, suffocating me.

"I'm not hungry."

"How do you expect to get your strength back if you don't eat?"

"I may never get my strength back..." I was more scarred than ever before. I'd lost nearly half my blood. I hadn't looked at my face but I knew it was demolished. I probably didn't look like myself at all.

"Button, you will." The nickname came by surprise but he didn't hesitate at the word. He looked at me the way he used to, full of respect and admiration. "I'll help you get there."

While the belief warmed my heart, it wasn't enough. Hopelessness flooded inside me. After nearly dying from my injuries I would never be the same. It would take months to recover. And even then, I wouldn't be able to run as fast or push as hard.

He spotted the unease on my face, knowing exactly what I was thinking. "Don't do that."

"Do what?"