Only for you, blondie, a Cessna and a feeble in the same day. No wonder I feel so nauseous."

"Hey, Alexandra, awful nice of you to come on up here," Wally greeted me as Mike and I rounded the side of the terminal building.

"This here's Eb May hew I think you know him works with me in the office."

"Hi, Eb. I'm Alex Cooper, this is Mike Chapman. I've known your sister for years, Eb used to baby-sit for my brothers' kids when they vacationed here every summer.

Detective Chapman's with the Homicide Squad in New York the D.A. has him with me on the case."

"Finest kind," said Wally, with a cheeriness in his voice at this reunion which made it hard to focus on the fact that we were all together because of a murder.

"And this fella is Trooper Lumbert, he's with the state police. Been real helpful up at your place. Keeps all them tourists away from Daggett's Pond, all looking for souvenirs of Miss Lascar.

Finest kind. Then we got Special Agent Luther Waldron, sent up here by the Federal Bureau. Real lucky to get him, never had a special agent on one of my cases before."

I was too far away to kick Mike in the shins, but he was humming the theme song from that old TV show and being fairly obnoxious: "Secret a-gent man, secret a-gent man, they've given you a number and taken 'way your name."

Typical meeting between fed and NYPD cop, which was likely to take a bit of the joy out of Wally's day.

We all shook hands and exchanged greetings while I asked Wally what he had planned for the day.

"Actually, ma'am," interrupted Agent Waldron, "I'm in charge at this point, so we'll be talking about my plans for the day, if you don't mind. I thought we'd all go up to your place. Show you the crime scene, then have you take us through the house, tell us how you left it and whether there are any changes, anything you might notice about the deceased's habits or belongings. Will that be all right with you?"

Mike had been trying to hold back but wasn't good for much longer.

"When are you going to bring us up to date on what you've got so far?

Leads, clues, evidence, theories?"

"Well, Mr. Chapman, my understanding is that you're here in an unofficial capacity, sort of a shall-we-say hand holding function, for Ms. Cooper. I don't think there's much I can tell you in the way of evidentiary information."

"Hey, Luther, let me tell you something. I'm here as a-' "Forget it, Mike. Give it a rest. I'll call Battaglia and we'll straighten this out. I'm sure Agent Waldron has his orders, just like we do."

Waldron turned to the three local investigators and suggested they go back into the terminal office with him to call their respective bases and inform the higher-ups of their next destination. I tried to smooth Mike over, but he and the fed were clearly off on the wrong foot.

"Isn't Wally perfect?" I asked.

"You'd expect to see him working with Angela Lansbury in Cabot Cove, wouldn't you?"

"How come he says "finest kind" after everything?"

"I don't know it's some kind of old New England expression Wally uses it all the time."

"What do you guess Eb is short for?"

"Old Mayhew name, Mike. It's Ebenezer."

"Jeez, I feel like I'm in a time warp expect to see the Mayflower pull up any minute."

"The Mayhews were the original island settlers. My house is part of one of the old Mayhew farms, built almost two hundred years ago.

They've got classic names, wonderful old names: Zachariah, Zephaniah, Experience, Caleb, Patience, Ransford..."

"What's the matter? Didn't they ever hear of John and Mary...?"

"And Michael and Kathleen and Joseph? They got a little farther than your people on the names, Mikey. Much more interesting."

Over Mike's shoulder I could see Special Agent Waldron emerging to rejoin us. I was determined to make the day as pleasant as it could be under the circumstances, and so I smiled and asked how long he had been on the island.

"Just twenty-four hours this trip, ma'am. But I was here a few years ago doing advance for the President on one of his vacations. Beautiful spot. First time for you, Chapman?"

I wasn't at all surprised to hear Mike respond the way he often did when he felt insulted and wanted to get back into the game.

"No, Luther, actually not. It's been a while, but I used to sail up here a lot Edgartown regatta spent some weekends with a girl whose old man kept a boat here.

Think he used to be in the Bureau. Found out the whole squad had been doing her decided to call it quits." He could bullshit with the best.

Luther ignored Mike and went right on talking to me.

I understand sex crimes is your specialty, Alex. At least that's what Wally tells me. Why would a girl like you want to spend all her time thinking about things like that?

Beats me."

It looked like I might have to admit Mike was right. The guy was on his way to proving what a schmuck he was.

"Did you hear the one about the woman who was raped by a man with a very little penis?" Luther went on, clearly thinking he was on a roll and would win me over with this one.

Before I could decide whether to say 'no' or a more strongly worded "I'm not interested," Luther announced that the woman said to her assailant, '"Did anyone ever tell you what a small organ you have?" And the rapist looked back at her and answered, "Lady, I never knew I'd have to play it in such a large cathedral."

I was silent. I had heard lousy, tasteless attempts at humor about rape before, but this was at a time and place to hit a new low.

"Mike, want to go over with me to the Hertz office?"

"We've checked that out already," Luther broke in.

"It's not the one Isabella used. She picked up the Mustang at the rental office in town, near the ferry terminal."

"Thanks. But it's not that. We're clearly going to need our own car today, okay?"

"We'll take you anywhere you need to go, Ms. Cooper.

I've got a government car... you can ride with me."

"Not possible, Luther," Mike said as he steered my elbow across the grass to the rental car area.

"She's allergic to polyester. Five minutes in the car with you and she's likely to lose it all over your best suit. Trust me, she's hell on synthetics."

We were fortunate to get one of the rental cars, since the annual Bluefish Derby, which attracted devotees from all over the Northeast, was in its last days and fishermen were everywhere. I pulled out of the parking lot and yelled to Wally that we would meet them all up on Daggett's Pond Way. The airport is in the middle of the island, so we turned west and began the ride to my house, twenty minutes up-island, taking the South Road so I could point out my favorite sights along the way.

"We've got to get some information about Isabella and the investigation. You think Wally will give it to you?" Mike queried.

"That's our best shot. We should be able to pick up a bit when they walk the crime scene with us. But at some point, back at the house, let's make sure that one of us has a few moments alone with Wally. I don't have to invite the trooper and Luther in for tea once they're through with me as a witness. But we'll ask Wally to stay, and you can suggest to Eb that he take you around the property and catch you up on some May hew history. Wally's a softie I'm sure he'll give us some direction, once we get Luther out of the picture."