Chapter 57 | That Kind of Person Doesnt Exist

There were so many things she wanted to say to him, but for some reason, she felt like she was running out of time.

So, out of all the things she couldve said, Rienne said the thing she wanted to the most.

There is no child.

No one ever took me away from you, so you may take me back in full.

Or something like that.

But she couldnt remember what Black said back to herif he said anything at all. At the time, she was convinced it was only a dream, but apparently it wasnt. He really did come to find her.

[Rienne] How did he know..?

Rienne felt herself getting nervous.Did he find Klimah, who was supposed to be hiding? And then did he asked Klimah where she was? In that case, how was Klimah now? Was he alright? Maybe he was already dead..

[Mrs. Flambard] You were missing for so long, Princess. And everyones misunderstood because of the blood on your dress. You still havent said anything, yes? So I didnt say anything, either.

[Rienne] What?

The womans voice perked up Riennes ears, filling her with strange thoughts. Rienne looked up, staring at her.

[Mrs. Flambard] .There was a lot of blood, Princess. Everyone saw it. And now, he seems to think youve lost your child.

[Rienne] Excuse me?

This was something she hadnt considered.

[Mrs. Flambard] So

Mrs. Flambard nodded her head in embarrassment.

[Mrs. Flambard] I decided to stay quiet because I thought that would be for the best. And the doctor ended up confirming it because of all the blood.

[Rienne] No, but I.

She told him. She said, theres no child. There never was from the start.

Dont tell me he didnt hear me.

[Rienne] What did Lord Tiwakan say?

[Mrs. Flambard] What did he say? About the lost child, you mean?

[Rienne] Yes.

[Mrs. Flambard] Well, thats

The woman suddenly grabbed Riennes hand. Her touch was very kind and soothing, almost like a mother just before her daughters wedding day.

[Mrs. Flambard] He didnt say anything. He only told the doctor to save you, Princess.

[Rienne] Is that so

[Mrs. Flambard] But I caught a glimpse of his face, Princess, and I was able to see so many of his emotions. He looked sincerely worried for youas if his heart were breaking at what happened.

[Rienne] Thats.

Is that.really true?

[Mrs. Flambard] I think youve met a very fine life partner, Princess. Telling him the truth or not wont make much of a difference now, in my opinion. Im sure if you truly did have a child, he would have cherished them as his own.

[Rienne] . . .

He cant do that.

It was already very strange that he was so willing to accept a child of Kleinfelder blood as his own, but it would make no sense for him to feel affection towards the child Rienne gave birth to.

That kind of person didnt exist in this world.

[Rienne] Maam.

As the woman held her hand, kindly holding it with a kind face, she looked up to Rienne who had called out to her.

[Mrs. Flambard] Yes, Princess?

[Rienne] Do you remember the old king?

[Mrs. Flambard] You mean your father?

[Rienne] No, before that. The king of the Gainers family.

[Mrs. Flambard] Oh, yes I think I remember him, though I never met him up close. Wasnt he the king who died from a curse while on a hunting trip with his knights?

[Rienne] Did you say, curse?

[Mrs. Flambard] Yes, I did.

Mrs. Flambard lowered her voice, looking around as though what she was saying was a secret.

[Mrs. Flambard] Now, the rumor is a bit hush-hush, but they say the king was punished for doing something to earn the fury of God. He was still young when he died, and it was somewhere no one could find him, so many believe that to be the truth. They even say merely speaking his name is enough to bring down the wrath of God, Princess. So you mustnt speak that name too lightly.

Deep in her chest, Rienne could feel her anger pulsating.

A curse? So they killed him and then passed off some nonsense story about a curse as the truth? All so they could try and erase their sin of treason.

[Rienne] Dont say that, maam. There is no curse. And repeating such words only

Boom!

The bedroom door swung open with such force, it sounded like it was breaking, causing both Rienne and her nanny to pull back in surprise.

Standing in the door frame was Black, who had thrown the door open as if he were intent on destroying it.

[Black] Youre awake.

Seeing his face, illuminated by the flickering light of the candle, he looked unusually pale.

[Rienne] Yes.

And meeting him now wasnt as easy as she thought. She felt very uncomfortable.

Rienne closed her eyes, letting out a soft sigh in the meantime. But in the moment her eyes were closed, Black closed the distance between them before she realized it.

[Mrs. Flambard] I will take my leave.

The woman quickly stood up from her seat, bowing towards them.

[Rienne] You dont have to do that.

But as Rienne reached out to stop her, Black took a hold of her hand, gently pulling her back before she could.

[Mrs. Flambard] Call me if you need anything, Princess.

And with that, Mrs. Flambard quickly excused herself. It would appear as though she had no intention of awkwardly allowing herself to stay stuck in between them.

[Black] Youre just waking up now.

Hearing the sound of the door safely shutting, Black sat down in the chair that her nanny had left vacant, but that wasnt enough for him, so he pulled it closer to the edge of Riennes bedside.

He took Riennes hand and interlocked their fingers. Once their hands were tightly intertwined, he brought her hand up to his lips, giving it a sweet kiss.

[Black] You slept so long, I was about to wake you up.

[Rienne] . . .

Hearing Riennes echoing silence, Black tilted his head.

[Black] Did you want to sleep more?

[Rienne] .No.

Actually, she was still very tired, but she didnt want to go to sleep. If she slept, she would only end up feeling worried about tomorrow. Falling asleep at such a strange time would only mean waking up at a strange time, too.

[Black] Are you hungry?

[Rienne] Not especially.

[Black] Then what do you need?

[Rienne] . . .

Thinking about it, funnily enough, there was only one thing she really wanted.

She wanted to erase her memory. Specifically, all her memories of what she talked to that servant about. Of ever meeting him to begin with.

In comparison to now, her past worries seemed so simple. When all she had to do was wait for the perfect time and place to tell Black the truth about her pregnancy.

Thinking about that now, it just felt so foolish.

That was nothing in comparison to what now plagued her mind.

[Black] You can say anything you want. Like anything you can remember about the person who did this to you.

[Rienne] .I didnt see them.

Hesitating for a moment, thats how Rienne decided to answer.

If it became known that Klimah kidnapped her, it would only become harder to help him like she promised. Of course, Black already knew about him and what hed done, but Rienne didnt know that.

[Rienne] After I lost consciousness, I was alone by the time I came to.

[Black] Do you remember seeing me?

[Rienne] Yes

[Black] Alright then. Thats all that matters. Nothing too bad mustve happened since you can remember things clearly.

Black ran his hand through Riennes pale colored hair, his touch so soft and kind that she could barely feel it. When he acted like this, no one would ever guess he was dealing with the daughter of his enemy.

Was it becausehe was too young at the time to know what the Arsak family did? Could he only remember the Kleinfelders part in it all?

Was that why he could treat her like this?

[Rienne] . . .

The more Riennes thoughts started to spiral, the paler she became.

He said he was eight years old at the time, so he may not remember the names of all seven families.

But he wasnt the only one who didnt know anything. She thought that shed been the royalty of Nauk since the moment she was born, living in blissful ignorance all this time.

So that was probably how it was.

He still didnt know exactly who she was. To him, she was just the person he remembered as being the one his engagement was nearly arranged with when he was young.

[Black] Whats on your mind?

Black slowly swept Riennes face with his hand. His touch was as kind and friendly as a dancing flame, and yet, at the same time, it stung her like a sudden flash of freezing water.

[Rienne] I have something I need to tell you.

Her heart stung.

Rienne pulled together what little courage she had, tugging on Blacks sleeve. He said he liked it when she touched him, and she prayed that was still true.

[Rienne] But please promise me something first.

[Black] Speak.

Black looked down at her hand that was holding onto him. From Riennes point of view, there was an unmistakable hunger in his eyes.

I think I know why hes doing this to me.

He said he wanted a home. A place he could return to where nothing threatened him. A place where he could relax his mind and lower his defenses without fear.

For him, Rienne was that place.

Even if she deserved nothing, he deserved to get that.

..So I cant.

She couldnt say it.

My father killed yours and usurped your throne.

I am not your home. Im not the one meant to stay with you, sharing a bed together until were old. Im the daughter of the one who destroyed your life.

She couldnt say any of that.

If she did, this man would only lose his home again.

Rienne wasnt sure if this was just an excuse to protect herself from the truth, but the reality was that she knew she couldnt take this away from him.

She couldnt take anything more from him.

It was already the Arsak family who stripped him of his home in the first place. It would be far too cruel and awful to do that to him a second time.

[Black] Why arent you saying anything?

Seeing Rienne open and close her mouth several times, Black started to get worried, taking a lock of her hair and rubbing it between his fingers, bringing it to his lips. Like he was trying to warm his hands.

[Rienne] Its.

[Black] Yes?

[Rienne] You may get angry once you hear this.

[Black] Thats for me to decide. So what is it?

[Rienne] But please, dont take your anger out on anyone else. Please dont get mad at my nanny.

[Black] Did your nanny do something wrong?

[Rienne] She didnt do anything on her own. She was only following my orders, so none of it is her fault.

[Black] If you so wish, I will do that. So speak.

Was this the right thing? Was it her own arrogance believing she had the power to protect this mans ideal of a home?

She didnt know what the right choice was.

But even if my heart is in so much agony over thisI dont want you to feel any of that anymore. I dont want you to lose anything ever again. I only want you to find the things you lost.

Everything you wanted to take back.

Everything you were supposed to have.

[Rienne] I didnt lose my child.

Rienne didnt notice this, but the fingers she was gripping around Blacks sleeve tensed, almost the point where they felt as though they were about to break. But Black saw it.

He held onto her hand, slowly loosening the tension in her fingers.

[Black] Did you want to talk about that?

He didnt seem to understand what she was trying to say.

[Rienne] Im trying to tell you I didnt lose my child.

[Black] You havent drank much water today, so you must be thirsty. Wait here.

So he tried to avoid the conversation, steering it in another direction. He was thinking Rienne was in denial, trying to run away from reality because she couldnt bear the shock of losing her baby.

As Black moved away from her, Rienne reached out and grabbed onto his sleeve again.

[Rienne] I never had a child. From the very beginning, I was never pregnant.

[Black] .? What did you just say?

Black, who was about to stand up from his chair, stared at Riennehis entire body completely stiff as he slowly sunk back into his seat.

[Rienne] I lied. To refuse the proposal.

[Black] . . .

[Rienne] And I know, Ive had several opportunities to tell the truth, but I kept hiding it. I was afraid control over Nauk would be taken away from the Arsak family.

[Black] . . .

[Rienne] But I know I shouldnt have done that. If youre angry with me, I completely understand.

[Black] . . .

The whole time Rienne spoke, he stayed completely silent. It was proof that not even once did he ever doubt her when she told him she was pregnant.

This man was completely honest.

Except for trying to hide his name.

[Rienne] Im so sorry. I was going to tell you before, but then the fires broke out.

[Black] You were bleeding..

After a while, Black frowned, muttering in a low voice to himself.

[Black] If it wasnt because of the child then whyAh. That was probably because of

[Rienne] .Yes.

Then there was silence again.

Was it just her that was feeling the oppressive nature of the quiet stillness in the room? He looked a little agitated.or maybe betrayed?

As the uneasiness gripped her, Rienne let go of Blacks sleeve, her fingers falling to take his hand instead.

[Rienne] My nanny isnt at fault. I am the only one to blame.

[Black] Yeah, no.I got that.

[Rienne] A, are you alright?He frowned, clear wrinkles forming between his tightly knit eyebrows.

He didnt look okay at all.

[Black] I dont know.

I shouldve seen this coming.

Holding onto Blacks hand, Rienne loosened her hold on him, her fingers helplessly falling away.

[Rienne] Im so sorry.

She wasnt sure what else she could say.

Black stayed like that for a while, slowly tilting his head as he looked towards Rienne. His eyes, their glare as sharp as mirrors, pierced Rienne.

[Black] I dont know how I would describe this feeling.But I dont think okay is the right way of putting it.

* * *