"I don't think you need be afraid, Bob," his sister laughed. "You won't find Dr. Burke a very severe kind of instructor. n.o.body but Gerald would ever have thought of choosing him."
"Sure, and didn't you agree with me, Carrie," her husband said, in an aggrieved voice, "that as we were not going to make the boy a parson, and as it was too much to expect him to learn Spanish, and a score of other things, at once; that we ought to get someone who would make his lessons pleasant for him, and not be worrying his soul out of his body with all sorts of useless balderdash?"
"Yes, we agreed that, Gerald; but there was a limit, and when you told me you had spoken to Teddy Burke about it, and arranged the matter with him, I thought you had gone beyond that limit, altogether."
"He is just the man for Bob, Carrie. That boy will find it mighty dull here, after a bit, and will want someone to cheer him up. I promised the old gentleman I would find him someone who could push Bob on in his humanities; and Teddy Burke has taken his degree at Dublin, and I will venture to say will get him on faster than a stiff starched man will do. Bob would always be playing tricks, with a fellow like that, and be getting into rows with him. There will be no playing tricks with Teddy Burke, for he is up to the whole thing, himself."
"I should think he is, Gerald. Well, we will see how it works, anyhow.
"Go on with your fowl, Bob. You will see all about it, in good time."
Bob felt satisfied that the teacher his brother-in-law had chosen for him was not a very formidable personage; and his curiosity as to what he would be like was satisfied, that evening. After he had finished his meal, he went for a stroll with Captain O'Halloran through the town, and round the batteries at that end of the Rock, returning to supper. After the meal was over, they went up to the terrace above. There was not a breath of wind, and a lamp on a table there burned without a flicker.
They had scarcely taken their seats when Manola announced Dr.
Burke, and a minute later an officer in uniform made his appearance on the terrace. He wore a pair of blue spectacles, and advanced in a stiff and formal manner.
"I wish you a good evening, Mrs. O'Halloran. So this is our young friend!
"You are well, I hope, Master Repton; and are none the worse for the inconveniences I hear you have suffered on your voyage?"
Carrie, to Bob's surprise, burst into a fit of laughter.
"What is the matter, Mrs. O'Halloran?" Dr. Burke asked, looking at her with an air of mild amazement.
"I am laughing at you, Teddy Burke. How can you be so ridiculous?"
The doctor removed his spectacles.
"Now, Mrs. O'Halloran," he said, with a strong brogue. "Do you call that acting fairly by me? Didn't you talk to me yourself, half an hour yesterday, and impress upon me that I ought to be grave and steady, now that I was going to enter upon the duties of a pedagogue; and ain't I trying my best to act up to your instructions, and there you burst out laughing in my face, and spoil it all, entirely?
"Gerald said to me, 'Now mind, Teddy, it is a responsible affair.
The boy is up to all sorts of divarsions, and divil a bit will he attend to ye, if he finds that you are as bad, if not worse, than he is himself.'
"'But,' said I, 'it's Latin and such like that you are wanting me to teach him; and not manners at all, at all.'
"And he says, 'It is all one. It is quiet and well behaved that you have got to be, Teddy. The missis has been houlding out about the iniquity of taking a spalpeen, like yourself; and it is for you to show her that she is mistaken, altogether.'
"So I said, 'You trust me, Gerald, I will be as grave as a doctor of divinity.'
"So I got out these gla.s.ses--which I bought because they told me that they would be wanted here, to keep out the glare of the sun--and I came here, and spoke as proper as might be; and then, Mrs. O'Halloran, you burst out laughing in my face, and destroy the whole effect of these spectacles, and all.
"Well, we must make the best of a bad business; and we will try, for a bit, anyhow. If he won't mind me, Gerald must go to the chaplain, as he intended to; and I pity the boy, then. I would rather be had up before the colonel, any day, than have any matter in dispute with him."
"You are too bad, Teddy Burke," Mrs. O'Halloran said, still laughing. "It was all very well for you to try and look sensible, but to put on that face was too absurd. You know you could not have kept it up for five minutes.
"No, I don't think it will do," and she looked serious now. "I always thought that it was out of the question, but this bad beginning settles it."
But Bob, who had been immensely amused, now broke in.
"Why not, Carrie? I am sure I should work better, for Dr. Burke, than I should for anyone who was very strict and stiff. One is always wanting to do something, with a man like that: to play tricks with his wig or pigtail, or something of that sort. You might let us try, anyhow; and if Dr. Burke finds that I am not attentive, and don't mind him, then you can put me with somebody else."
"Sure, we shall get on first rate, Mrs. O'Halloran. Gerald says the boy is a sensible boy, and that he has been working very well under an old uncle of yours. He knows for himself that it's no use his having a master, if he isn't going to try his best to get on. When I was at school, I used to get larrupped every day; and used to think, to myself, what a grand thing it would be to have a master just like what Dr. Burke, M.D., Dublin, is now; and I expect it is just about the same, with him. We sha'n't work any the worse because, maybe, we will joke over it, sometimes."
"Very well, then, we will try, Teddy; though I know the whole regiment will think Gerald and I have gone mad, when they hear about it. But I shall keep my eye upon you both."
"The more you keep your eye upon me, the better I shall be plazed, Mrs. O'Halloran; saving your husband's presence," the doctor said, insinuatingly.
"Do sit down and be reasonable, Teddy. There are cigars in that box on the table."
"The tobacco here almost reconciles one to living outside Ireland,"
Dr. Burke said, as he lit a cigar, and seated himself in one of the comfortable chairs. "Just about a quarter the price they are at home, and brandy at one shilling per bottle. It is lucky for the country that we don't get them at that price, in Ireland; for it is mighty few boys they would get to enlist, if they could get tobacco and spirits at such prices, at home."
"I have been telling Gerald that it will be much better for him to drink claret, out here," Mrs. O'Halloran said.
"And you are not far wrong," the doctor agreed; "but the native wines here are good enough for me, and you can get them at sixpence a quart. I was telling them, at mess yesterday, that we must not write home and tell them about it; or faith, there would be such an emigration that the Rock wouldn't hold the people--not if you were to build houses all over it. Sixpence a quart, and good sound tipple!
"Sure, and it was a mighty mistake of Providence that Ireland was not dropped down into the sea, off the coast of Spain. What a country it would have been!"
"I don't know, Teddy," Captain O'Halloran said. "As the people don't kill themselves with overwork, now, I doubt if they would ever work at all, if they had the excuse of a hot climate for doing nothing."
"There would not have been so much need, Gerald. They needn't have bothered about the thatch, when it only rains once in six months, or so; while as for clothes, it is little enough they would have needed. And the bogs would all have dried up, and they would have had crops without more trouble than just scratching the ground, and sowing in the seed; and they would have grown oranges, instead of praties. Oh, it would have been a great country, entirely!"
The doctor's three listeners all went off into a burst of laughter, at the seriousness with which he spoke.
"But you would have had trouble with your pigs," Mrs. O'Halloran said. "The Spanish pigs are wild, fierce-looking beasts, and would never be content to share the cottages."
"Ah! But we would have had Irish pigs just the same as now. Well, what do you think--" and he broke off suddenly, sitting upright, and dropping the brogue altogether--"they were saying, at mess, that the natives declare there are lots of Spanish troops moving down in this direction; and that a number of ships are expected, with stores, at Algeciras."
"Well, what of that?" Mrs. O'Halloran asked. "We are at peace with Spain. What does it matter where they move their troops, or land stores?"
"That is just the thing. We are at peace with them, sure enough; but that is no reason why we should be always at peace. You know how they hate seeing our flag flying over the Rock; and they may think that, now we have got our hands full with France, and the American colonists, it will be the right time for them to join in the scrimmage, and see if they can't get the Rock back again."
"But they would never go to war, without any ground of complaint!"
"I don't know, Mrs. O'Halloran. When one wants to pick a quarrel with a man, it is always a mighty easy thing to do so. You can tread on his toe, and ask him what he put it there for; or sit down on his hat, and swear that he put it on the chair on purpose; or tell him that you do not like the colour of his hair, or that his nose isn't the shape that pleases you. It is the easiest thing in the world to find something to quarrel about, when you have a mind for it."
"Are you quite serious, Teddy?"
"Never more serious in my life.
"Have you heard about it, Gerald?"
"I heard them saying something about it, when we were waiting for the colonel on parade, this morning; but I did not think much of it."
"Well, of course, it mayn't be true, Gerald; but the colonel and major both seemed to think that there was something in it. It seems, from what they said, that the governor has had letters that seemed to confirm the news that several regiments are on the march south; and that stores are being collected at Cadiz, and some of the other seaports. There is nothing, as far as we know, specially said about Gibraltar; but what else can they be getting ready for, unless it is to cross the Straits and attack the Moors--and they are at peace with them, at present, just as they are with us? I mean to think that they are coming here, till we are downright sure they are not. The news is so good, I mean to believe that it is true, as long as I can."
"For shame, Teddy!" Mrs. O'Halloran said. "You can't be so wicked as to hope that they are going to attack us?"