During the weeks that followed, Nance was too busy to think of herself or her own affairs. She superintended the shopping and packing for Mrs.
Clarke; she acted as private secretary for Mr. Clarke; she went on endless errands, and looked after the innumerable details that a family migration entails.
Mac, sulking on the couch, feeling grossly abused and neglected, spent most of his time inveighing against Dr. Adair. "He's got to let you come out by the end of next month." he threatened Nance, "or I'll take the first train home. What's he got up his sleeve anyhow?"
"Ask him," advised Nance, over her shoulder, as she vanished into the hall.
Toward the end of November the Clarkes took their departure; father, mother, and son, two servants, and the despised, but efficient Miss Hanna. Nance went down to see them off, hovering over the unsuspecting Mac with feelings of mingled relief and contrition.
"I wish you'd let me tell him," she implored Mrs. Clarke. "He's bound to know soon. Why not get it over with now?"
Mrs. Clarke was in instant panic.
"Not a word, I implore you! We will break the news to him when he is better. Be good to him now, let him go away happy. Please, dear, for my sake!" With the strength of the weak, she carried her point.
For the quarter of an hour before the train started, Nance resolutely kept the situation in hand, not giving Mac a chance to speak to her alone, and keeping up a running fire of nonsense that provoked even Mr.
Clarke to laughter. When the "All Aboard!" sounded from without, there was scant time for good-bys. She hurried out, and when on the platform, turned eagerly to scan the windows above her. A gust of smoke swept between her and the slow-moving train; then as it cleared she caught her last glimpse of a gay irresponsible face propped about with pillows and a thin hand that threw her kisses as far as she could see.
It was with a curious feeling of elation mingled with depression, that she tramped back to the hospital through the gloom of that November day.
Until a month ago she had scarcely had a thought beyond Mac and the progress of his case; even now she missed his constant demands upon her, and her heart ached for the disappointment that awaited him. But under these disturbing thoughts something new and strange and beautiful was calling her.
Half mechanically she spent the rest of the afternoon reestablishing herself in the nurses' quarters at the hospital which she had left nearly four months before. At six o'clock she put on the gray cape and small gray bonnet that const.i.tuted her uniform, and leaving word that she would report for duty at nine o'clock, went to the corner and boarded a street car. It was a warm evening for November, and the car with its throng of home-going workers was close and uncomfortable. But Nance, clinging to a strap, and jostled on every side, was superbly indifferent to her surroundings. With lifted chin and preoccupied eyes, she held counsel with herself, sometimes moving her lips slightly as if rehearsing a part.
At b.u.t.ternut Lane she got out and made her way to the old white house midway of the square.
A little boy was perched on the gate post, swinging a pair of fat legs and trying to whistle. There was no lack of effort on his part, but the whistle for some reason refused to come. He tried hooking a small finger inside the corners of his mouth; he tried it with teeth together and teeth apart.
Nance, sympathizing with his thwarted ambition, smiled as she approached; then she caught her breath. The large brown eyes that the child turned upon her were disconcertingly familiar.
"Is this Ted?" she asked.
He nodded mistrustfully; then after surveying her gravely, evidently thought better of her and volunteered the information that he was waiting for his daddy.
"Where is Mrs. Purdy?" Nance asked.
"Her's making me a gingerbread man."
"I know a story about a gingerbread man; want to hear it?"
"Is it scareful?" asked Ted.
"No, just funny," Nance a.s.sured. Then while he sat very still on the gate post, with round eyes full of wonder, Nance stood in front of him with his chubby fists in her hands and told him one of Mr. Demry's old fairy tales. So absorbed were they both that neither of them heard an approaching step until it was quite near.
"Daddy!" cried Ted, in sudden rapture, scrambling down from the post and hurling himself against the new-comer.
But for once his daddy's first greeting was not for him. Dan seized Nance's outstretched hand and studied her face with hungry, inquiring eyes.
"I've come to say good-by, Dan," she said in a matter-of-fact tone.
His face hardened.
"Then you are going with the Clarkes? You've decided?"
"I've decided. Can't we go over to the summer-house for a few minutes. I want to talk to you."
They crossed the yard to the sheltered bower in its cl.u.s.ter of bare trees, while Ted trudged behind them kicking up clouds of dead leaves with his small square-toed boots.
"You run in to Mother Purdy, Teddykins," said Dan, but Nance caught the child's hand.
"Better keep him here," she said with an unsteady laugh. "I got to get something off my chest once and for all; then I'll skidoo."
But Ted had already spied a squirrel and gone in pursuit, and Nance's eyes followed him absently.
"When I met you in the office the other day," she said, "I thought I could bluff it through. But when I saw you all knocked up like that; and knew that you cared--" Her eyes came back to his. "Dan we might as well face the truth."
"You mean--"
"I mean I'm going to wait for you if I have to wait forever. You're not free now, but when you are, I'll come to you."
He made one stride toward her and swept her into his arms.
"Do you mean it, girl?" he asked, his voice breaking with the unexpected joy. "You are going to stand by me? You are going to wait?"
"Let me go, Dan!" she implored. "Where's Ted? I mustn't stay--I--"
But Dan held her as if he never meant to let her go, and suddenly she ceased to struggle or to consider right or wrong or consequences. She lifted her head and her lips met his in complete surrender. For the first time in her short and stormy career she had found exactly what she wanted.
For a long time they stood thus; then Dan recovered himself with a start.
He pushed her away from him almost roughly. "Nance, I didn't mean to! I won't again! Only I've wanted you so long, I've been so unhappy. I can't let you leave me now! I can't let you go with the Clarkes!"
"You don't have to. They've gone without me."
"But you said you'd come to say good-by. I thought you were starting to California."
"Well, I'm not. I am going to stay right here. Dr. Adair has asked me to take charge of the clinic--the new one they are going to open in Calvary Alley."
"And we're going to be near each other, able to see each other every day--"
But she stopped him resolutely.
"No, Dan, no. I knew we couldn't do that before I came to-night. Now I know it more than ever. Don't you see we got to cut it all out? Got to keep away from each other just the same as if I was in California and you were here?"
Dan's big strong hands again seized hers.
"It won't be wrong for us just to see each other," he urged hotly. "I promise never to say a word of love or to touch you, Nance. What's happened to-night need never happen again. We can hold on to ourselves; we can be just good friends until--"
But Nance pulled her hands away impatiently.
"You might. I couldn't. I tell you I got to keep away from you, Dan.